I Will Remember You
by LabyrinthDweller
Summary: CHAP25 REVISED! With a bad life left behind him, Ulrich has come back to Kadic Academy, hoping to get away from his ever violent father. But will his once friends break his alias before time runs out? T for language and abuse content
1. The Girl with the Sword

I literally have nothing else written about this story at the moment. But I know exactly what's going to happen. (and it's my most favorite idea ever) Hope you guys like. If you want to cheat at the story, go to my deviantpage. hahaha. cheaters.

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Chapter 1: The Girl with the Sword

_So I'm moving away from my True Family to my Foster Family_

It ended that day

Xana had launched yet another attack upon us. I had to stay back for a bit to deal with my irate father. Yumi and the others went ahead to the factory to get the tower deactivated as soon as possible. Knowing my father, I most likely had to sit this one out—or at least, until I found an opportunity to break free. My dad was more into the argument than most days, I must admit. So when Jeremy called me from the factory, his face turned beet red, and he directly ordered me not to answer it.

Since Jeremy had told me he wouldn't call unless it was an emergency, I answered the phone anyways. Dad looked like he was about to burst. But that's how he always is around me. Like I would care if he did or didn't.

"Come to the factory now," Jeremy almost begged, "Odd's injured, but he made it to Lyoko. I'm fine for the moment, but you never know. We need you here!"

Not really wanting to go without hard reason, I naturally asked him what else went wrong, to try and throw my father off just a step.

"And Yumi?"

Jeremy paused. I didn't know if I should take that as a good sign, but I waited for him.

"She's...upstairs, fighting back Xana…Ulrich, she's hurt badly. The only reason why we left her is that she was too damaged to go to Lyoko, and that she insisted we hurry."

My muscles tensed. She had told me (and technically herself) to back off when it came to our relationship. Reluctantly, I did, but that didn't mean I had no feelings for her still.

"How bad…?" I asked in a low tone.

Jeremy paused again, and I heard some sort of muffled sound, as if it came from the monitor. It didn't sound like Lyoko, so I assumed he had the cameras up. The sound was metallic, like metal slamming on metal. There was a scrambled feminine voice somewhere in there, and it sounded like she was struggling to keep up. Jeremy coughed, and replied with much hesitation.

"Odd's only got a sprained wrist. Yumi…has a broken arm and probably a few cracked ribs. Her shoulder's bleeding, too," He shifted his position, and I imagined him pushing his glasses up in anticipation. "Look, Ulrich, I know what you're going through with your father, but truth is, Yumi might not make this one alone."

I sucked in a breath and clenched my free hand. If I weren't on the phone at that moment, I would've probably sworn under my breath. If I also wasn't in front of my father, I would've sworn loud enough to be heard from five feet away. Bad habit, I know, but whenever someone's in trouble…even if it _is_ Sissy, I swear my head off if it's really that dire.

Like right now. Yumi was in dire need of my help, and, like always, my father could—and would—wait.

I hung up my phone and gave a cheery wave at my father, speaking in a slight British accent, "Cheerio, Dad!" And with that, before he could respond, I was out the door and already racing to the factory.

Because I had met him in Jim's room, (horror) I passed my own down the hallway. Thinking quickly, I jumped into my room, grabbed my katana that I use for martial arts, and then sprinted down the corridor, not caring if I got all of the 'looks.' Mr. Harris, the history teacher, tried to stop me as I raced down the hallway, but, me being me, I ignored him and tore right past without a second's hesitation. Time was short, and speed was crucial.

Instead of climbing down the ladder, I leaped after I closed the lid over my head. Pushing my skateboard (and my legs) to their limits, I leaped across the sewers, hoping to make it in just enough time so that Yumi wouldn't be torn limb from limb when I got there. I gave Jeremy a quick call as I scrambled up the ladder, telling him not to worry, and to tell Yumi that I'd be there within a few seconds. He obliged quickly by hanging up and dialing her.

Up ahead at the factory, I heard the chinking of metal and frantic footsteps that must've been trying to run, but instead came up with a half-hearted lope. I grimaced, and drew my sword.

Showtime.

**INSANITY: Doing something over and over again and expecting a different result. **

**Jeremy, totally.**

Back at Kadic, as I later found out, my dad was fuming. If I were there, I suspected that I would see just a little bit more than steam screech out of his ears. He stomped into Mr. Delmas's office, face as red as a ripe apple.

"Mr. Delmas," He seethed, shaking with rage, "It's time you know what the family is planning to do. Ulrich is obviously ignoring schoolwork here because of his friends. We are taking him from Kadic, and we're setting him up out of this district. Is that clear?"

"Of course it is," Mr. Delmas replied matter-of-factly, "I'm very sorry that we couldn't succeed here. I'll let him know as soon as possible." He shuffled a few papers, and began writing a random document. My dad turned and walked away, still red-faced, grumbling a complaint under his breath.

"It was my wife's idea to set him up here, anyways…," He slammed the door behind him, and got in his car. He fixed his rearview mirror so it was focused on a few of the school kids just wandering aimlessly around. He scowled into it, and drove home to my mother, who was waiting for the bomb to drop on her.

**PERSEVERANCE: Never giving up in what you believe in.**

**That's Yumi**.

Xana's attack was babyishly simple, but cleverly deadly. From Jeremy's explanation, (don't think that I figured it out all by myself) he took control over all things metal, shaped them to his liking, threw a 'tantrum', and flung everything at everybody. The main center of attention of the attack, though, was a swirling cloud of a specter in the midst of all the other chaos. At least it was better than attacking us with giant teddy bears or food monsters. I almost laughed out loud, and I probably would've if I hadn't have seen what it did to Yumi.

She looked alright for her situation. I mean, she was stumbling badly after she was branded the best sprinter ever to see Kadic and her shoulder was cut, the arm was broken badly, and she hugged her chest in pain every time she so much as took a breath. She was also running out of space to run, and her sleek hair was getting in her way…

Okay. So she was beat up. But that's the reason I was there, right?

Sucking in a big breath of preparation, I quickly unsheathed my sword. It occurred to me that my sword might fly from my hand from the Xana attack, but that's a chance I would have to take.

I decided not to call to Yumi so I wouldn't get Xana's attention, so in turn, I wouldn't get 'shot' at. Really stupid, because Yumi probably still thought she was on her own, because I saw no sign that Jeremy's call had reached her. Keeping low, I raced along the side of the factory until I came up and kept pace with Yumi.

Although it was hard for me to do, I kept one eye on Yumi and my other on all of the flying objects. It wasn't long before I realized that I couldn't keep doing this. Yumi was toast. Buttered toast in Xana's case. Even though she tried to run in a jagged line, her injuries wouldn't allow keeping up with that. Her loping was reduced to a straight line, down to a quick dead end. Something constricted at my chest, even though I wasn't being attacked. I dismissed it as a reaction to the cafeteria food, although deep down I knew it was much more.

A flash of silver caught the corner of my eye. It was headed straight for Yumi. Sharpened or not, it would have killed her at the speed it was going. I did the only thing I could. I acted.

This is where I get to proudly boast that "Man is better than Machine." Xana was fast, but I was faster. Maybe it was because I jumped off from the top floor, either that or I was just piled up to my eyes with luck. Whatever the reason, it doesn't matter, because Yumi made it.

Yumi must have been totally stunned as soon as I bowled into her, sending both of us sprawling. I instantly felt a pang of regret, because the exact spot where all my body weight was concentrated was her broken arm and torn shoulder. Ouch.

My left cheek was facing the ceiling of the factory when I knocked her down. Turns out that even though I was fast, I wasn't fast enough. The flying piece of metal _was_ sharpened, and it slashed from mid-cheek to almost the inside corner of my eye. Talk about real close calls. I gave a gasp of shock and relief as the metal soared past, damaging nothing else that was breathing. Fresh blood soared from my wound and splattered randomly on the floor. At first I felt no pain, just a cool sleek sensation where I was cut, like slipping into a soothing chilly pool, then the pain came searing across my face. I cried out shortly in agony, then we landed.

It was especially excruciating for Yumi, for one she hurt just another part of her body by slamming into the thick metal floor, and for another I landed straight on top of her already injured arm. She screamed in pain, and I rolled off her as quick as possible, being careful that my sword wouldn't hurt anything. As far as I could tell, Yumi was trying to contain her screams. She grasped her broken arm tenderly when I rolled off, desperate to try and soothe the pain. I rested my hand gingerly on her shoulder to reassure her, then looked up to locate how far away from the elevator we were.

Grimacing, I turned back to Yumi, one hand holding the sword, the other her shoulder. She forced her eyes to open and gave me a small nod of thanks. I noticed that she was biting her lower lip so hard that I expected to see blood at any second. I spoke softly, so as not to rattle her brain too much.

"We're about fifty meters from here to the elevator. Can you make it?"

Yumi let out a gasp and spoke in an unsteady voice, shaking her head slightly, "No. There's no way I can make it. It's too far."

I stole another glance up, and saw the whirlwind of a Xana ever so slowly creep toward us. Somehow finding the wise-crack do-no-good side of me within an instant, I replied to her, picking her up piggy-back style (which was hard with the sword)

"Well, that's just too bad!"

Yumi gave a short yell of protest as I grabbed her and slung her on my back. But even so, she wrapped her arms around my neck wordlessly. She gave a nod against my head to signal that she was ready, so I took off, running in that classic zigzag pattern.

It must've been quite a sight, to see me running from a bunch of flying metal objects with a girl riding on my back with me holding her legs and my sword at the same time. I didn't have to think hard to imagine what Odd would've said about this.

I wasn't the best runner in the world. I practically die half-way through the hundred meter dash. Problem was, the dash to the elevator was exactly that. To make matters worse, Yumi was on my back and injured badly. I had to deal with an approximate 120 pound girl on my back in addition to Xana throwing crow bars at me! (At this moment, I pray that Yumi'll never read this.) It was a wonder why I was gifted with super sprint on Lyoko.

Nevertheless, I pumped my legs faster, pushing myself so I could reach the elevator without collapsing. Yumi kept looking back to check Xana's position, and constantly gave me warnings whenever we got close to danger. You gotta hand it to her, even when she's close to uselessness; she makes do with what she's got.

Finally, we reached the elevator. I gratefully let Yumi slide off my back, and she slumped down, gulping in air and holding her arm like she was cradling a baby. Every now and then a wince would escape her lips from the constant pain and no support. Thinking about her well-being, I pushed the elevator button and waited, raising my sword in case any metal object decided to fly at us.

The elevator opened just a tad later than expected. On top of that, Xana just sent a swarm of sharpened javelin-poles hurling toward us. Without giving a thought of being careful, I grabbed Yumi by the sweater and half-threw, half-shoved her into the compartment. She gave a short shriek, but cut it off in an attempt not to alarm me. I ignored that.

My mind was currently focused on the speeding xanafied javelins headed straight for me. They were just as fast—if not faster—than the other one I faced only moments before. I grimaced, and leaped over into the elevator.

Xana caught on quickly, and sent one of the javelins over and straight for my head. Reacting faster than I thought I could, I brought my sword up and parried it by sending it flying upward.

I failed, but succeeded at the same time. The pole didn't kill me; it just grazed the same cheek that was already bleeding creating an X, just like on Ruroni Kenshin. The cut wasn't as long, but it was deeper. I batted the javelin to the ground with my sword, and kept my foot on it so it wouldn't rise again. The elevator door slammed shut as the compartment jerked, shutting out all the other deadly poles. Suddenly we were moving down toward the counsel room. Yumi laid her head back and heaved a heavy sigh of relief. I turned to her, cheek striped red with blood, and gave her an uneasy smile.

Yumi blinked and forced a smile out. She ran her good hand through her hair a few times, and then rested her forehead in it, still staring up at me.

"You have a real knack for saving tails, don't you?" she asked, her voice hitting a high-pitched note at the end from her broken arm. Feeling like a total idiot, I took off my top shirt and kneeled down, talking as I went.

"Erm, not really. It's more of a 'leap before you look' kind of thing," I said, gesturing to her left arm. "Where is it broken?"

Yumi painfully moved her arm and I took it gently. She spoke as I transformed my shirt into a makeshift sling, "Up by the elbow, I think. Careful, it—ah!!"

I'm sure that if she'd finished her sentence, she would've said 'It hurts a lot.' Scared that I had made it worse, I pulled back immediately and apologized. She nodded her head, accepting it, and continued through gritted teeth.

"It's alright—it just hurts, you can continue…with…," She paused in mid-sentence and her cheeks flushed to a rosy color. If my face hadn't been red already, I'm sure it would've flushed too. Noticing my mouth was open slightly; I shut it and quickly fastened the sling around her back. (which I almost had to hug her to do.) She uttered an embarrassed sound, and I mumbled something about professional nurses. Yumi gave a short laugh as I straightened up.

The elevator door opened and I stood up quickly, picking up my sword. Jeremy eyed it first, then almost dropped his glasses when he saw my cheek.

"Ulrich! What happened? Are you okay?!" He said, concern clouding his voice. I blinked a few times, then laughed out loud, even though my face hurt every time I smiled.

"Don't worry, Jeremy," I said after I was quite through laughing, "It looks a lot worse than it feels. I'm alright." Jeremy shook his head in wonder, and beckoned me in. I turned around and helped Yumi to stand. She winced as her ribs moved as she stood, but she tried to conceal her pain. I put a hand on her shoulder, then we walked over to the monitor.

"Xana's attack took us by surprise. If we had been a bit more aware, Yumi and Odd wouldn't have been injured." Jeremy explained.

"Stop blaming yourself, Jeremy," Yumi said, giving him a friendly smack. "It was as much our fault as it is yours."

Jeremy shook his head in disagreement, and in turn Yumi smacked him again. Something told me that her hits were painfully weaker than normal. Her face twisted slightly for less than a second as the unfamiliar sensation of pain shot up her arm, but she straightened it out and stared at the monitor intently, even though she didn't know what any of it meant.

It didn't take long before Odd and Aelita clambered up the ladder and greeted us with the concerned stares. I simply waved them off, but Yumi took them gratefully, and told them not to worry. Jeremy waited for the murmuring between us to calm down, before he raised the most important question.

"Return trip, or no return trip?"

Silence fell down on us before the murmur started up again.

"I say we go for it," Odd said, "Yumi's pretty much beaten to the bone. What excuse could we possibly come up with?"

Yumi shook her head. "I can live, Odd, and the last thing we need is for Xana to get stronger again. We wanna limit how much we use the return trips."

"I agree fully," I added, putting a hand up in defense, "I'd hate it if Xana would be able to come up with controlling fifty people at once and having them all go against us. This latest attack was pretty weak, but we've all seen what Xana can do. I vote against it."

Aelita nodded knowingly, speaking in her usual soft tone, "I see both sides of the argument, but if I would have to choose, I would go with Odd. Unless, of course, we can think up of a good excuse for Yumi's condition, then I'd say don't do it."

Everybody looked simultaneously at Jeremy. He was staring at the screen, the light reflecting off of his glasses and creating an eerie sensation for his eyes.

"We need a tie-breaker, Jer," Odd said cheerfully, "You're the guy to do it!"

Jeremy stared on, completely silent. Everybody else stared at him like he was a movie screen, and the monster was just about to jump out and devour him, but it was taking hours to get there. Finally, Jeremy pushed his glasses up, and spoke one word.

"No."

There was more silence. As usual, Odd broke it by asking yet another question.

"No to what?"

"No to the return trip. We can't afford to find out what would happen to Xana next. We need to save those until we need them for the worst emergencies." Jeremy jumped down from his 'high seat' and began walking to the elevator. Odd began protesting along the way.

"But what about Yumi's arm? And Ulrich's cheek, and my wrist? What are going to be our excuses?" Jeremy almost ignored him because of his stupidity, but replied nonetheless.

"A fall. Yumi's injuries result perfectly with a fall from the cliff in the woods. A little slip of the foot. For you? You fell down and threw your hand out to stop yourself. As for Ulrich…,"

"Let me guess, I was practicing with my katana and became careless," I said with a sarcastic tone.

"Not quite what I was thinking, but that's good too." Jeremy admitted. Odd threw me a wink, and Aelita giggled softly. I rolled my eyes, and was about to make a smart comeback in my defense when my cell phone buzzed.

Confused, because all my friends were already with me, I pulled it out and checked the number. Everyone gave an expectant look, and I shrugged. Who knew the principal would call?

"Yes Mr. Delmas?" I asked, trying to sound as polite as possible. Mr. Delmas cleared his throat before continuing, a strange tone in his voice. I tried not to look interested or worried, because somehow I knew what this was about.

"Hello, Ulrich, your father just left me with some crucial information,"

I paused. My dad wasn't at school anymore—that was good. Crucial information? That was bad. I answered slowly, hoping my voice wouldn't waver.

"Yes…what is it?"

Odd stole a glance over at me. He knew something was wrong from the way I was speaking. Great. Now I have to answer a lot of questions. I turned away from him and the others, straining to listen to see if Mr. Delmas was doing anything else. All I heard was a sigh, and the sound of a pen being put down.

"Your parents want to move you to a totally different school district. I'm sorry that we couldn't provide the proper learning environment for you. They already have everything set up. You will be moving to a public school tomorrow. Pack up tonight, Ulrich, your father will be here in the morning."

Mr. Delmas didn't hang up. I didn't either. I was struck stiff with shock. I imagine even my heart stopped beating for a long moment. What must have been three minutes passed, then Mr. Delmas sighed again.

"Well, Ulrich, I can't do anything. It's been a pleasure knowing you." With that, he hung up.

A pleasure? _A pleasure??!!!_ I'm about to leave the only school where I really felt like I belonged and he said it's been a _pleasure_ knowing me??!! I wanted to go over there and throttle him. I squeezed my phone so hard that I thought I would crush it. I was seething with anger. They were going to take me away from the only family I felt I really had aside from my mother occasionally. And Yumi…

Yumi…

Oh God, I hadn't gathered up the courage to tell her yet. I was going to leave the only person I've ever loved in my dust without even hinting that I couldn't live without her. They couldn't do this to me!!!

Unfortunately, I never had much voice when it came to arguments. They did do it to me. They took me away from my friends—my family, the only place I felt like I truly belonged and I could be myself. My heart stopped beating completely then.

"Hey man, you okay? Didn't he hang up already?" Odd asked, a worried tone in his voice.

I tore my cell away from my ear angrily, growling deeply at him as I shoved it in my pocket.

"Yes he _did,_ Odd!! Now stop questioning me!!!"

I could literally feel the entire room turn to stone as I slammed on the elevator button.

**SILLYNESS: Never sad even in the darkest hours.**

**Well, that's Odd.**

"Hey, Ulrich? Ulrich? Could you come out, please? Everyone's really worried about you!"

"The hell they are!" I spat. Was I annoyed? Oh yeah.

Odd was outside our dorm. I was inside. As soon as I got back I stormed and locked myself out here, never coming out. Hours had passed, and I had completely skipped supper. Yumi was sure to be long gone by now. It was already quarter after seven. At least my friends knew when to leave me alone. This was the first time they even bothered to contact me. Still, I didn't like it one bit.

Odd took almost no notice of my profanity usage and knocked harder. I scowled, and snarled at him to shut up and go away. Odd sniffed behind the door. I couldn't tell if he was laughing or doing something else. I was about to tell Odd off for the last time when he spoke up before me.

"I _have_ shut up and gone away, Ulrich. For as long as I dared could. But I couldn't stand it anymore. Ulrich, we've got to talk,"

I dismissed him with a "tch" and rolled over in my bed. Odd sighed beyond the doorway, and continued with a calmer, steadier voice.

"Has your cheek stopped bleeding yet?"

I was quiet as I pondered this. After a moment I got up and rubbed my washed and dried face in my hands, "To tell you the truth, Odd…," I said as I walked to the door, opening it. Odd stood there, more patient than I'd ever seen him, "I don't think it'll ever stop bleeding."

Odd looked me up and down. "How poetic. Can I come in?" he asked.

"Half of it is your dorm anyways…," I waited as he sat down on his bed, the continued on, solemnly, "Better get comfortable by yourself—you're losing a roommate."

Odd looked up at me like a lightning bolt, his vibrant violet eyes wide in shock. I sighed, and sat down on my bed across from him.

"Let me explain…," I said finally.

**SENSITIVITY: Knowing how to react kindly and softly.**

**All Aelita**

I could _not_ get up that morning. It was impossible. Thankfully I had packed everything the night before with Odd's help. My Dad would pick me up at eight. It was already 7:30. I had buried myself within the bed sheets of the cot, trying to steal a few more minutes of sleeping in this room. Fat chance.

Odd violently grabbed a struggling Kiwi and threw him on my stomach. I let out a loud whoosh of air and sat up, brushing the yelping dog off me. Odd gave me a long stare, and I looked up at him.

"What?" I asked, annoyed.

"Jeremy and Aelita know, and I left Yumi a message last night." He said in a sad, monotonous tone.

"So?" I retorted, trying to sound as if I could care less about me leaving. Odd sighed.

"Your friends would like to see you before you go."

I blinked, and got up. It was somehow always Odd that persuaded me to do things. Or maybe his seriousness scared me into getting dressed. Odd sighed and waited outside with my bag. As I got dressed something bad occurred to me. At the time it had happened I'd been too angry to notice; but now I did.

I left my katana at the factory last night.

"Shit," I breathed. That thing cost at least seven hundred bucks. I did not want to lose that thing—especially right before I switched schools. I opened the door just a little angrier than last night. How could I have been so stupid to leave it there? Odd gave me his age-old "question" look, and I scowled at the ground.

"I left the sword at the factory yesterday." I grumbled as I snatched my bag off the ground and headed downstairs. Odd followed, explaining as he went with an innocent tone.

"Don't you worry about it. Yumi noticed before she left and took it with her. Uh…she didn't give it to me though. Must've forgotten—or figured that, uh, that…,"

"That what?" I snapped, leaping the last two stairs. Odd fidgeted, and glanced at my bag. Sighing deeply, I set it down and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. His violet eyes stared deep into mine, and I forced myself to calm down. I really shouldn't have been treating him like that. He was my best friend, and I might not be seeing him for a while. A really, really _long_ while.

"Look, I've been acting like a real jerk lately, okay? I just…this has all happened so fast, and I, I don't want to leave you guys. You're all like family to me," _A family I never had_, a thought shouted as I spoke. At that time I ignored it, but it came back to haunt me forevermore. "And I don't want you to forget that, m'kay? You know I couldn't imagine life without you guys—and without Lyoko. Besides, you're my best friend. Why would I ever forget you?" I patted his shoulder, and Odd smiled at me before I let it slip away. There was a minute or so where we just stood staring at each other silently. I could see that tears were stinging Odd's eyes. I felt bad, because I did not feel the pain that you usually do when you're trying to hold back tears.

Truth was, I hadn't really cried since I was about five or six. Long time, I know, but let me explain.

I don't quite remember what caused me to quit crying, but I do remember it had something to do with my parents. They were fighting I think. Being only a kindergartener I started to cry when the shouting got nasty. All I remember is my scared mother and a fuming father. Everything blacked out for a while after that for about two hours. Afterwards my mother told not to cry ever again. So I didn't.

"We, uh, better go out and meet the others." I said as Odd sniffed a few times. He nodded, and started for the door. As he turned a thought came to my mind. Wordlessly I grabbed the dog tag that I wore around my neck and took it off. I remember the exact day I got that thing. It was a month after we had successfully materialized Aelita, so we decided to go out for a little mini-party. While browsing through a store, Odd saw this dog tag with the word SAMURAI embossed into it. After he showed it to everybody, they wouldn't stop pestering me until I bought it. That dog tag and I haven't parted since. So when I handed it dangling on the chain to Odd, it took him a while to pick his jaw off the floor.

"But I can't do that!" He exclaimed, trying to refuse the gift. I insisted, and forced it into his hand as he continued, "I can't take that, Ulrich! You love that thing!"

I shook my head and opened the door, stepping outside while dropping it in his hand. "It'll be safer with you. Besides, it'll be like a token," I paused and took in a big breath of Kadic's air, then started toward Jeremy and Aelita, who were at a bench near the vending machines, "So you won't forget…," my voice trailed off as I saw my friends.

Although I'm sure Odd was thoroughly confused, he didn't say anything, and pocketed my dog tag. Jeremy and Aelita looked up as I approached, the faintest hint of sadness surrounding them. Under normal circumstances, that would be weird, but this was anything from normal. Aelita managed a good smile, while Jeremy failed in trying to follow suit. When I finally got there I just stood, at a loss for words.

"Hey," Aelita said quietly.

"Hi," I mumbled as I looked around the courtyard. I dropped my bag and turned my attention on my two smarter friends. "Uhm…Where's Yumi?" I asked, feeling really stupid. Silence disturbed me, so I wanted to have a conversation—or, at least, attempt at one. Jeremy shifted his feet.

"Not here yet," he muttered. I could tell he was taking this hard. It kind of shocked me—out of all of them I would've never guessed that Jeremy would be the one to take this as hard as he was. Interesting.

I nodded slowly at his reply, and almost instantly my eyes became glued to the gate. No one, not even Odd said something to lighten the mood. There was no use.

As I was watching the gate I thought about how quickly this happened. One day I'm here, the next I'm packed up and leaving. It just didn't make any sense. How long were my parents plotting this? People just can't switch schools overnight—there has to be _some_ arrangement. Although, it sounded like it was all new to Mr. Delmas; not that he really cared, but still. He must've gone on uninformed until yesterday.

"Hey…you aren't anxious to leave, are you?" Odd asked meekly and in a worried tone. I snapped back to reality and swung my head toward him. Me? Anxious to leave? Are you kidding?

"Where did you get _that_ idea?" I asked him like he just told me he had a wolverine in his underwear. "I already told you—I _can't _leave; not without leaving everything behind here! You're my family, Odd! All of you," I looked around me, meeting everyone's eyes. Immediately, I felt like I wanted to crawl into a corner and die of embarrassment. Sheesh. I never realized what a big mouth I had. "All of you…," I echoed, and turned my gaze back to the gatehouse. Even with Aelita, Jeremy and Odd here, I felt empty. If you knew me well, it doesn't take a genius to figure out why.

Aelita knew me well.

"She'll be here, I promise," she whispered softly, putting a hand on my shoulder.

"She's usually here by now," I protested, fidgeting with my fingers, "What's keeping her, Aelita?" I asked her; for she was the only salvation I had at that moment. I was incredibly nervous. How could I leave without saying good-bye to the girl I loved? I knew my dad wouldn't wait for that if he showed before she did. I bit my lower lip. I guess I should add that I've never been this nervous before in my life.

"It's gotta be the arm, remember? Maybe she's having trouble with that. Don't worry, she'll be here." Aelita said reassuringly. I wanted her prediction to be right. Jeremy stared at me through his glasses with sky blue eyes. He blinked a few times, and I saw a tiny tear escape. Aelita turned her head toward him sympathetically, and left me to his side. He snuffled a few times, then said he was all right. For the time being, at least.

I stood there, waiting intently. Minutes passed, and she never showed up. I looked around, and grabbed Jeremy's hand. He didn't resist as I pulled up his shirt sleeve and checked the time. 7:49. I took in a deep shaky breath to try and calm myself so I wouldn't do something stupid. I was leaving in about ten minutes. If Yumi wasn't here, I might as well melt from sorrow and drift away forever. My face became twisted with worry. The bell had rung four minutes ago, but Mr. Delmas had let my friends stay out in the courtyard to see me off. Hmph. Nice guy.

Odd patted my back, trying to reassure me everything was fine; even if he knew that everything wasn't. I looked up to the sky and watched the few clouds floating in it change shape as the wind carried them by. Five minutes. No Yumi.

Five minutes. Yes, there was a dad.

He blasted his horn out at me even though I saw him pull up. I was glad that the windows of the car were tinted so my friends couldn't see his possibly furious face. I shook my head multiple times, and turned to Jer and Aelita. Aelita smiled weakly. I shook my head again, and pulled both of them into a hug. Jeremy started to cry on my shoulder, and Aelita didn't try to stop a flow of silent tears. I pulled away, and turned to Odd. Odd gave me a sad-but-I'm-trying-to-cover-it-up look. I smiled, and grabbed him into a headlock and noogied his brains out.

Normally, whenever I did this to him (which was often) he would shout in protest until I finally stopped, laughing hard. He'd scowl at me, then disappear into the bathroom to fix his messed up hair. But this time, he just remained silent and smiled as tears began to flow down his face now. I let him go, and picked up my bag, giving my friends one last glance. My father blared the horn again, and I began to walk out of Kadic for the last time.

I Opened the backseat door and threw in my bag and slammed it shut, opening the passenger door.

A high wince-gasp caught my ear, and I stood there reluctantly with the door open. I slowly turned my head in her direction. Yumi stared at me, her chocolate eyes shining on the brim of crying. She was standing on the sidewalk, hugging herself despite the nice weather. Her arm was in a sling and cast, and her shoulder bulged from the bandage underneath her turtleneck. Her posture was crouched over, hesitant and timid. I felt a pang of pity for her as I stared.

In her left hand, the broken one, she clutched the beech wood of my sword sheath. For a second, I feared she might break it, but that thought was washed away. The maroon hilt stuck up at the top, tilted sideways and catching the sunlight in a mournful way, reminding me of dark funeral attire. Yumi looked like she was about to die. I didn't blink as I stared at her, but something did happen.

One, single, tear escaped my eye and flowed down my scarred cheek, following my face to underneath my chin where it broke off and hit the pavement. It was only one tear, a miniscule drop of water, but when it hit the pavement, it shook the world.

I grunted sadly and turned away, clambering into the waiting vehicle. Yumi didn't stop me to give me my sword back. To heck with seven hundred bucks. It's rightfully hers, now. A piece of memory left behind to remind her of the friendship we shared. I wondered if she thought it was more than just a friendship.

My father grumbled as he hit the pedal and we literally sped off. I reclined the seat and closed my eyes, sighing deeply, thinking of what I left behind.

Jeremy. My friend who more times than not saved my life in the most unusual and uncanny ways. The friend who introduced me to Lyoko and an adventure I would never, ever forget.

Gone.

Aelita. The girl I and my friends saved from an evil super computer. The friend that always listened to me and calmed my hot-headed anger down when it was needed. She was unbelievable.

Gone.

Odd. My strange best friend. A match that no one would've believed. He and I shared more memories and laughter than most, and we were the tightest bond within the group. I would miss him terribly—he knew how to read me like a book, and even though I hated it at first, I miss it now.

Gone.

Yumi. I loved her. No, that's pessimistic. I _love_ her. More than anything else. I could've told her two minutes ago, but I didn't. I don't know why. Maybe I thought the sword was enough. I wonder if she feels as empty as I do when we're not near each other. I swear to God, I left more than half of me stranded at Kadic Academy.

Gone.

Gone, forever.

------------------------

Has anyone ever noticed how strange the word "gone" is? -shudder-

well, R&R as always. :)


	2. The Nightmare Begins

After being mauled and maimed by...fans...(including bRoK3n h3aRt or whatever here on fanfiction) and after all this doo-hickey work work school bad crap, I've finally finished the second chapter. Woo. Yay. Good for me.

And here's where Reese gets his teen rating. Domestic Abuse. It is not pretty...

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Chapter 2: The Nightmare Begins

_Welcome home, Ulrich…_

I changed the music in the car from my dad's country to my hard rock. I know, inconsiderate son hating his parent's music. But really—_bluegrass?_ Who listens to _bluegrass_?! Anything's better than that. My dad flashed me a weak glare, then kept his eyes on the road for the rest of the way. I could tell he was hiding something—but what?

Minutes passed in uneasy silence. I lay back in the seat with my eyes closed; trying to get a grip on what was happening to me and what might happen in my future. Let me put it simply: I couldn't.

The car—which was an old eighty's sedan—pulled up into the cracked driveway leading to my cramped little house with a mostly-green lawn and a few bushes here and there, and about three meters of backyard. The house was a very pale yellow-tan that reminded me of a palomino. (I never mentioned that I like horses. I do. Really. Magnificent animal. Now that I think about it, I know why I never talked about that…,) The paint had just begun to chip off, but you wouldn't notice from afar. Guarding the front of the house was a black iron gate fence, the kind you would see in front of a proud gothic church. Tall hedges surrounded the sides and back of the house, cutting us off from any friendly neighborly communication. God, I hated this place. It was a cage, and I was an anxious tiger, pacing back and forth within it and trying to find out how I could break free back into the liberties of wilderness. I sighed as I got out and shut the car door, grabbing my bag. Freedom was going to be a thought of the past from now on. I missed it already.

My dad all but shoved me into the house—not too violently, but violent enough to make a huge difference. I failed to fight back a scowl, and thanked my lucky star that he wasn't paying attention. Instead, his drilling dark brown gaze was boring into somebody else. I flinched away from him, shrugging up the shoulder nearest to his as if he were a dangerous virus. I don't really know why. Sixth senses scare me, but mostly because they're almost always right.

This one was so right it was wrong.

My mother stood frozen in the narrow hallway, staring at my father fearfully. Her fearful stare lasted under a second, because after seeing me she put a mask on and began to look happy and joyful. But it was too late, because I had already seen the panic in her eyes. A warning sign clicked into my brain as this slowly turned over in my head. Something was definitely wrong here with this family.

Did I just call this a family?

GEEKINESS: Wearing glasses and being obsessed over a certain topic to the point of insane perfection.

Is that Jeremy over there?

Dinner was bland. I'm not saying the food was good—it was Chinese takeout, it had to be good—but the atmosphere was bland. It was bland in such a way that no one talked, but the room was full of noise.

Anxiety radiated around my mother, shying away from the authority and bad temper of my father. She kept glancing up at him nervously, over and over again. My father apparently didn't notice, as he was reading stock reports in the local newspaper. It was if I didn't just come today—that my presence didn't really matter. It was fine by me, but did I seem like the only one who was totally confused about this strange behavior?

Okay. Dumb question.

"Meria, clean up and take the trash out. Now." My father said gruffly. My Mother, Meria, winced, and crept alongside the table, grabbing everyone's plates and woefully stacking them near the sink. Curious to see what would happen, I didn't offer to help. Later, I wished I would've.

After she slowly scrubbed away the plates and threw away the take out trash during the awkward silence, my dad crumpled up the newspaper and shoved it to her. The select place where he shoved it was questionable—a little low in the chest there—yet still I did nothing. She scrambled to pick it up before it hit the floor, and shoved it ungracefully into the garbage bag. I waited.

She stumbled and disappeared out the door. While she was gone my father got up and got a bottle of beer from the fridge and sat back down, opening it. I noticed that he was counting the seconds on the clock. An unknown shudder worked its way up my spine as I watched his intense eyes blaze with alcohol over dosage. They flickered once as the door quietly opened and my mother slipped back into the house. It was obvious that she didn't want to be noticed. Unfortunately, that old door hasn't been oiled since they bought the house—meaning that the creaks sounded like Godzilla was roaring just down the block. My dad scowled, and stood up.

What happened next was something I would never, ever forget for as long as I live.

My mother gurgled a small protesting "No" as my father approached her, fists clenched. She backed up against the wall, pushing herself against it as if it would somehow save her from the terror approaching. I watched on, a gaping spectator to a child's worst fears unfolding before him. My father growled lowly, towering over my petite mother.

"Damn woman—first you take a long time outside with the trash, now you've forgotten _again_ to oil the door."

"Lukas, I—,"

"Shut your mouth!"

"Wait—," I began to protest, but she cut me off.

"Ulrich, go to your room—Now!" she cried fearfully. My father seemed to light up with angry fire as she said that. He leaned closer to her, and I could see the wind of his breath brush her hair lightly.

"I told you to shut...your..._mouth_!!!" he scowled.

My mother shrieked as his hand reared back. There was one second's silence, then his fist came racing down, striking her in the cheek. After the first hit, he didn't stop. One after the other, he struck her, using different fists and different feet. Mom threw her hands up and ducked her head down as an attempt to protect her self as she slid down the wall until she cowered against it, trying to cover up her screams of pain as my father hit again and again and again.

Normally I would've torn the abuser off and beat the crap out of them if I saw this happening to anybody, but this was my _father_. First off, I was so stunned that I couldn't really twitch a muscle. Second off, my mother had told me to go away—that meant that it would be useless to try. Third off, and I repeat, he's my _father_. He helped _raise_ me. I never knew that he would be abusive. Hell, I never even expected him to _try_. It's just that being abused seems to be one of those things that are _supposed_ to happen to someone else. Either that or it's supposed to happen in fairy tales and fiction stories. And if it does happen in real life, it's supposed to be rare because our society is supposed to be golden-good. To suddenly come home and find your own father abusing your mother because she took too long taking the trash out is just…frightening. I swear to God, my knees were shaking as I watched the scene unfold before my very eyes. I didn't know what to do—for once, I didn't know what to do. Do you know how that feels? Do you know how it feels not being able to think of anything to do while someone close to you continuously gets hurt while you stand there and stare? Probably not.

It's worse than being damned to Hell. In fact, you probably _are_ damned to Hell if you just stand and stare. That means that I'll most likely have tea conversations with Hitler when my time's up.

"Go! _Go!!!_" My mother screamed in between punches.

Oh. Room. Right.

Slowly but surely I crept my way behind my dad's back, never letting my eyes stray from him for a second. My trembling hands finally curled around the stair railing, and forcedly I literally hauled myself up the wooden steps, unable to drown out my mother's screams below me.

COURAGE: Having heart enough to face your worst fears—no matter how terrible.

Yumi's here.

The beating session must've lasted for about another quarter of an hour before Mom's screams of pain died down to tears of sorrow. Even from my room way upstairs and my door shut tightly, I could still hear her crying into her arms. I heard my father's boots clomp around a bit, then heard the creaky door whoosh open, and then slam shut, making the entire cramped house shudder. I waited five minutes, standing anxiously in front of my door with my hand hovering just over the doorknob and listening as the eighties sedan rattled to life and clunked off into the evening. As I stared at the knob, I noticed my hand was shaking uncontrollably. Gathering up what little courage I had, I sucked in a deep breath, and twisted the door open.

My mother was still sobbing and still backed up against the wall when I silently crept down the stairs. (Well, as silently as possible with Godzilla-roaring creaks) She seemed to take no notice as I uncertainly climbed down the stairs. About four steps from the bottom, I stopped, swallowing a lump in my throat.

"…Mum?" my voice croaked like a British resident. She rolled her head around in her hands a few times, before finally looking up at me. Her eyes were puffy red from tears, and fringed with purple from already forming bruises. For the first time I noticed she looked paler and thinner than normal, and that her chestnut hair looked unkempt and ragged, kind of like mine most mornings. Her fragile frame looked battered, as if she's been knocked around quite a bit in the past. The tears seemed to have created a deep rut in her delicate cheeks, staining her pale skin to a dark peachy color. When she spoke, her voice rasped in a quiet whisper, her tongue striving to cooperate and create human words. Sometimes it was hard to decipher what she said, but I pulled through.

"Ulrich, my baby boy, oh Ulrich…,"

"Mum…?" I really didn't know what I should say next, so I just stood there, scared as a kitten that saw a snarling Doberman.

"I love you, Ulrich, you know that, right? Oh Ulrich, please say you know…,"

My mouth moved but no sound came out. She was talking to me as if I were a hallucination. It was weird and awkward standing there, with her staring at me as if I weren't really there, yet she thought I was. There was a jumble of feelings in my throat, and I tugged the next words out to try and calm her.

"Mom…of…of course, I…," I gulped, and slowly descended the rest of the stairs. Mom looked away, her forehead resting in the heel of her palm. Her eyes had squinted shut, and her teeth were gritted in frustration. More tears flowed down to join her already dampened shirt. Yeah. She truly thought I wasn't there.

Slowly but surely I advanced up to her and crouched down. "Mom?" I whispered fearfully. "Mom, it's me—it's really me. It's—it's Ulrich…,"

"Go away," she pleaded, "I know your tricks, just go away. Leave me alone."

"Mom," I felt my voice begin to crack and my eyes begin to sting, "Mom, I'm not a hallucination. Please, it's me!" I reached out a trembling hand and touched her shoulder. As soon as I did, she whipped her head around and gave me such a scary, fearful stare that I gasped and pulled my hand back. She looked me up and down, then finally in the eyes.

"You're not a hallucination?" She asked, still not sure.

"Mum…," was all I could say again. She stared at me a few minutes more, then began to cry again.

"Oh, Ulrich, I'm so sorry—that's right, Lukas brought you home today. Oh God, I'm so sorry. I didn't know, you see—oh I'm so sorry, please forgive me!" she pleaded. I'm sure she would've kept going on and on, but I interrupted her.

"Mom, Mom that's okay…I just…wanna know…er," I paused to try and see if I could say what I wanted to next. Thank God I could. "How long has he been doing this?"

My mom stared out into the distance, shaking her head. "I don't know. Oh God, it's been so long…,"

"When did he start this?"

Mother looked at me sadly, and turned away.

"Don't you remember? No, you don't, you lost consciousness just about every time. It's been this bad ever since you were four. I'm surprised he didn't kill you with the way he treated you. At least you've forgotten most—if not all—of this ever happening," she muttered, burying her face in her knees.

Holy crap.

Since I was _four_?

Holy _shit_.

Why can't I remember anything? You can't seriously tell me that I totally forgot that 'oh yeah, my dad beats the _fuck_ outta me every now and then just for fun'? You can't be serious that in fact the only thing I remember is a reason not to cry?

You just _can't_ be serious that my own father loves to take out his fiery anger on my mother?

But the letter was signed "Sincerely."

The letter of my new fate.

------------------

Let me tell you guys something I told bRoK3n h3aRt when she emailed me.

I'm thirteen years old. _Thirteen years old._ Why the heck am I writing about this...this...abuse story that's way way way outta my range of what I should write? What the heck? Why?

Do you have any idea how many people deny the fact that children are abused and families have domestic abuse? Do you know how many of them live on without ever telling their secret? I have no raw statistics for you, but I can say for true, that it is a lot.

Just to put a notice on the poor beaten souls out there. ;) Waaah, I'm acting so serious, my brain hurts! -runs away to dance with crazy monkeys-


	3. YinYang Shard

Hello, my friends my gang ya'all. (slaps self)

I...I think you've waited long enough.

Yeah. This chapter...doesn't really need an intro.

oh well.

**Chapter 3: Yin-Yang Shard**

_The last Remaining link_

I made a vow that night.

I took out my cell phone, and opened up the phone book memory. After minutes of staring longingly at my friend's numbers, I heaved a breath and deleted them all. I completely wiped the memory, and set the phone away. I sat on my bed sulkily, putting my thoughts into a plan.

I couldn't leave now. Now that I know what's happening, there's no way I could ever leave. My mother needs me, whether she admits it or not. I'm going to stay here for as long as possible, as long as it takes, until I can safely help my mom escape from this nightmare. She's put up with this for far too long.

The only thing is, I need evidence. Cold, hard, evidence. The problem with that is, I would have to wait until I could get something that was conclusive, that would turn the tide immediately in my direction, and so it couldn't turn back in my father's. That would take time. A long time. To be honest, I wasn't even sure how long it would take. But I knew that one day he would slip and I would be able to snatch my chance of freedom. Until then, I'm cutting off all communications with my family—my friends.

One, my dad would be furious with me about keeping contact.

Two, I couldn't bear to hear their voices again and hear how happy they are and I couldn't bear to hide from them my darkest secret.

Three, I love every single one of them, and to tangle them up in this mess as well as Xana would be wrong. I don't want to see them hurt on my account.

So it was decided.

Good-bye, my dear friends.

Hello, my dear mother.

**STUPIDITY: Some people say stupidity is bliss, but…**

**It's just a little Odd.**

Dad came home at exactly 1:36 a.m. last night. I know, because I couldn't sleep, and I was counting the minutes that I stayed awake. His boots clomped about for a while, but they never ascended the stairs. I assumed that he had fallen asleep on the couch, and kept reassuring myself that he wouldn't come up here for a long while. After telling myself this a thousand times over, I finally fell into slumber.

When morning arrived around eight o'clock, my dad had already disappeared from the house. I thought it was rather strange for a Saturday, but I didn't complain. You wouldn't see me crying over not having him here ever.

The day pretty much went on in silence between my mother and me. It wasn't harsh, hostile silence, more of a "we're here waiting for the bomb to drop" sort of silence. Believe me, when the doorbell rang both of us jumped six feet in the air, skittishly assuming that it was my father. Thank god it wasn't, but who it turned out to be would've still sent me six feet up. Maybe more.

"Ah, yes, Stern, I see I've come to the right place,"

"Er…Jim? What are you doing here?"

"One of the friends in your uh, group, wanted me to give this envelope. It _is_ addressed to you, you know." He said while handed over a small padded envelope. I took it, confused.

"A friend? Which one?"

Jim winked at me. Holding up his pointer finger, he shook it side to side like he was telling some kid that he'd been naughty. A sly smile crept up half his face as he answered, "Now that, my little friend, is specifically kept a secret, you hear? Yumi would kill me if—whoops! Uh-oh…,"

Uh-oh is right, Jim. If Yumi found out about that, well, let's just say been there, done that, _not_ doing it again. Jim must've known a little bit about how Yumi gets when she's angry, because he suddenly became a trembling little puppy.

"Er, um, you won't tell, will you?" He whispered, clearly shaken. I shook my head and forced out a smile. Okay, maybe it wasn't _that_ forced.

"What she doesn't know won't hurt her, right?" I responded. Jim straightened up and grinned widely. It seemed that because I wasn't a student at Kadic anymore, we were now buddies of some sort.

"Really? Oh that's a relief. Say, Stern, I have to go. Work and stuff. Lucky you now have all Saturdays off, huh? See you around, heh heh!"

Yeah. Luck-y me.

I retreated back into the house, shutting the door as quietly as possible behind me. Climbing up the stairs, my mind was filled with all the reasons of _why_ Yumi would spontaneously send me something a day after I moved out. More over, what did she send me? What would she want to send? The package had almost no weight at all to it; it was a wonder why she used a padded envelope. Maybe it was fragile? But then wouldn't there be weight to it?

Dismissing it as not fragile, I tossed it onto my bed and fished around in my dresser for something to wear. It was only nine-o-clock. I'm surprised Jim didn't comment on me still wearing my pajamas. Maybe he was too worked up about Yumi finding out about his little slip of the tongue. If I know him, she'll definitely find out somehow by accident; once again by slip of the tongue.

I had thrown on a pair of baggy dark teal jeans and a very light sea foam tank top. I was going to put on something else, but something twinged in the back of my mind, and my gaze floated over to the envelope on my bed. They say that curiosity killed the cat. Good thing I'm not a cat, right? (I mean, that would be Odd, no pun intended.)

Careful not to make any miniscule scraps, I slit open the envelope with my age-old pocketknife that I barely used—hence why it was in my end table drawer for two and a half years. Flipping it upside down, I shook it a bit so the contents fell out into the palm of my hand. Nothing much, just a small note card, and a necklace with a leather cord.

I read the note card first, entranced on how someone could write so neatly and so…cursively. (Is that even a word?)

_I know it's Chinese, but…_

_In a nutshell, the Yin-Yang was the egg in which the Earth was born. As you know, it's half black and half white. Black, representing female, and white, representing male. This principle is the basis for many oriental religions._

_This is my farewell to you._

_Good-Bye…Ulrich._

_Good-Bye…Ulrich__**…**_I read those words over and over and over again. Pain welled up in my chest. I'm sure Yumi knew that I would figure out who it was from in an instant from reading this, but she probably didn't want me to find out by means of Jim. I really didn't care. It didn't deduct its wealth whatsoever.

I stowed the note away in the dustiest corner of my room. It may sound cruel, but that must be the only place where no one but me would find it. Finally, for the first time, I opened my hand and looked down at the pendant.

It was half a Yin-Yang, the black/female half. I turned it over many times in my hand. It was made of fine ceramic, all in one piece. It was light and polished, hollow inside. There were a few notches peeking out from inside the pendant, and I turned it on its side just so the light could seep into the tiny cracks of the intricate clockwork that laced on the walls of the pendant. It was really well-made, and knowing Yumi this wasn't machine-made either. She likes the authentic stuff. It just brings to question how much this thing cost. Something interrupted that ponder as I studied it more.

It looked incomplete.

With the notches sticking out and the hollowness of the pendant, it looked ghostly, and, dare I say it, lonely. It hit me that there must be a white piece to this puzzle. Two guesses to where that was.

I ran my thumb over the cool smooth surface, pausing over the white circle, then rubbing over it again in a caring way. Did I just say caring? Weird, tender moment there. But my mind wasn't on this pendant or how I was treating it at the moment. No, it was with the pendant's brother, the white shard, and who the owner must be. Suddenly my thoughts washed over to Kadic, the sunlit courtyard, kids of all ages laughing in delight, shouting at each other in teasing ways and in all just having fun being together. Walking out into the warm sunlight to meet the rest of my friends at the vending machine of sour doom, or to meet them at a bench where we like to hang out. Talking, laughing, feeling free, feeling warm, fighting for worlds, fighting for words, fighting for what's right, fighting for friends, fighting for strangers, but most of all, fighting for love.

Goddamnit. Why?

Why did I take all those things for granted?

Why do I realize all these things now?

Why did they take me?

Why do I cry?

Believe me, I wanted to throw that thing out the window and watch the cars crush it into dust. I also wanted to keep it close to my heart and never let it leave me for as long as I lived. Both those wants choked me to tears.

I'm serious. The first thing I did was cry. Tears scrolled down my cheeks, the tears I should've cried when I saw all of my friends' sorrowful faces for the last time. The tears I should've cried when I gave Jeremy and Aelita good-bye hugs. The tears I should've cried when Odd didn't complain about his mussed hair. The tears that should've shown more when Yumi stood there, silent as ever on the sidewalk. I was alone now, and this pendant only made that more obvious.

I slipped it into my pocket and finished getting dressed by tossing on a loose unbuttoned shirt. I gathered the envelope and all traces that I had been sent something and headed outside. I found the nearest garbage can out on the street, and buried the envelope deep inside it. Talk about insecure. I wasn't taking any chances whatsoever.

Walking slowly back home, I thought about my current situation. Mom said that Dad probably wouldn't be home until 2:30, but don't expect exactly that. It gave me a lot of time to mope and think about…well, anything. Crap. I really needed a woods to go and sulk in at the moment. I think that was one of my favorite things about Kadic was the easy-access to the park. It was a little too calming for my own good.

Mom didn't ask me anything when I walked back in. I think she figured that I had had it all covered. I hoped I did. I really hoped I did.

**TALENTED: Having skills in many different ways, no matter which ways.**

**It's a talent of Aelita.**

"Meria!! Where are my beer bottles?!"

"I-In the fridge, as always…Lukas…,"

"'In the fridge as always, Lukas!'" my dad mocked. Wait a minute, why would he mock her? Especially in that statement? Oh. Uh-oh…

Immediately I stood up from the sofa, putting an old rotting classic book down on the coffee table.

"If you need more, I can get some." I said quickly, faintly hoping he'll let me pass. Urgh. I'm guessing he already had some alcohol today judging by his attitude.

"What…was that…?" my father said just like an impatient villain of some sort. You expect to see that on TV, right?

…Right?

My dad faced me in the living room, the sofa in between us. His dark eyes blazed with a certain type of hatred, one in which I wanted nothing to do with.

"Oh really? I bet not for _my_ use. You…! You stupid teenager!! You're the one that drank it!"

Has no one mentioned that I've never touched alcohol in my life? I haven't even the chance to access it much less drink it! And after this little adventure, I'm pretty sure I'll stay as far away from alcohol as possible. For the first time in front of my father, I said nothing in my defense. It would prove to be useless anyways.

"So, you think you could sneak away with that by offering to buy more? Stupid boy! You think we have the money?!" he roared.

Correction: We don't have the money because you've been spending it.

The look on my face must have told my dad what I was thinking, because suddenly without warning (and with agility and propulsion I didn't think he had) he launched himself over the sofa and grabbed me by the neck, pinning me onto the coffee table. Mom stifled a scream as I began to squirm in discomfort. Oops. My mom was a veteran to this thing, she knew the rules, what to do and what not to do. I was new to the game—and considering my cocky self, I thought I knew the basic rules.

And that's how I ended up like this. Smart, eh?

My dad started to ramble in my face, going from minor 'idiotic, imbecile, etc.' to major, in which he used words that I don't even use if I'm upset. As he yelled at me, I could smell the rank stench of alcohol seething from his mouth and teeth. I wrinkled my nose up and swung my head back and forth to try and escape the horrible smell. No such luck. My father tightened his grip on me, causing me to squirm more.

Suddenly I felt something blunt try to strike through my stomach. Air whooshed out of me as my organs squashed together in that awkward feeling of pain that comes in a fight. Realization struck me as I coughed to regain some senses. My father had begun to beat me.

There was nothing I really could do. I felt so helpless—and that was my worst feeling ever. I just can't stand feeling that way. Out of the corner of my eye I saw my mother staring at me painfully. She wanted to help, I know she did, but something told me that if she did the situation would only get worse. I guess I forgave her, as this was pretty intense all in itself.

It was strong, sure, but I've faced worse with Xana and all. I mean, my dad couldn't exactly spontaneously electrocute me or something. Ah, but there are worse things than getting electrocuted, as I soon found out.

A punch to the collar bone jarred me and I clacked my teeth together. Without warning, and without control, something slid straight out of my jacket pocket, clanked on the wood of the coffee table, and settled onto the carpet. I heaved a gasp of horror and hoped my dad didn't notice.

That little candle of hope that I have just keeps on getting dimmer and dimmer and dimmer as the seconds go by.

"What…," my dad snarled, "What…is that thing?" he scowled, snatching the Yin-Yang shard up in his filthy hands. I never took my eyes away from his as a gritted-teeth grimace appeared on my face. I said nothing in fear of saying the wrong thing.

"This…where did you get this?" he demanded. Ugh. Can anyone say breath mint? That alcohol's overpowering me. "Answer me, boy! Where…did…you…get…_this?_"

"I-I…," I started to say to no avail. I couldn't come up with a good, believable excuse. Needless to say I never come up with something that good. All I could do was stare at him and pray that he would let this go.

"Lukas, wait!" My mother unexpectedly piped up. My father turned in her direction, annoyance in his eyes.

"Lukas…," My mother began, "Don't you remember? I bought that for him ages ago. He just hasn't had it for so long because it's been here all this time."

Silence echoed the room. My father turned back to me, contemplating what my mother said. I already knew my father was totally unpredictable. I was just hoping that this was going to be a good day. My heart rate increased as he took longer and longer to decide. Finally, he sighed with a grimace.

"Fine. But I don't want to see it there ever again!" he decided. Both my mother and I let out sighs of relief. I felt a little sad since I'd still have to hide it somewhere, but it's what he said. I have no say in it.

"Kids these days—Why can't you honor the fact that your mother bought this for you? _Wear it, boy!_"

I had to stop myself from looking overly surprised. Uneasily I took the pendant from his hands and tied it around my neck. My father snorted and stomped out the door again—probably to get more beer. I gave a questioning look to my mother, but she just shook her head.

Like I said, my father was unpredictable. I was just glad it was one of his better days.

hmmm...Jim reminds me of someone...Gumshoe, yes, Dick Gumshoe...

ARGH! Now I can't think of one without the other!


	4. Timeline

GASP! Okay, this was completely rushed. I apologize if there are any mistakes, since this is the computer with the filtering system (growl!)

This was rather unexpected. This was rushed because SOMEBODY (cough) started chasing me with a huge medieval mace until I finally updated this. With all the work I have and want to do, I'm surprised I'm submitting this today.

Anyway, you know who you are. _It's all your fault._

_Edit: _Whew! I finally got on the computer without the filtering system. Thank god. This chapter was starting to bother me with so many blank spots._  
_

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Chapter 4: Timeline

_A quantum leap_

Every single night I have thanked God for letting my father be the most generous he has ever been the day he found the Yin-Yang shard. Because as it turned out, he became hostile at everything else, no exceptions. I felt like a Jew being pushed and harassed constantly by a Nazi. Though it wasn't as bad as what my mother was going through.

I admit, I did what I could to protect her. Every time my dad would start beating on her, I would throw myself in between them, there fore taking the heat of the punches, kicks, and the random object beating. But no matter how hard I tried, I could never protect her from my father's lust. I didn't even try when that came into play. At least, I didn't try to stop him when he was there.

Every morning that he decided to do that, after he had left the house for whatever reason he wanted to, I would always creep out of my room and try as silently as possible to slink into my parent's room. There, I would find my mother. She would always be in some protective position, moaning, weeping, or doing nothing at all. With the only thought in mind, I would always lightly touch her shoulder and shake her a bit.

"Mom," I would whisper, "Come on, Mom, you gotta get up. Come on. I'll help you over to the shower, but you gotta get up."

Sometimes it would take a lot longer than that, but more often than not she would always seep away from the bed, letting me almost fully support her for a minute or so as she struggled to find footing. Once she did, I'd help her creep slowly over to the bathroom. For a short moment I'd let her slump to the floor while I started up a nice hot shower for her. When she'd get in, I'd close the door behind me on my way out, and went off on my own business while I tried not to think about what I heard through the paper-thin walls the previous night. Most of the time, that certain "business" I usually attended to when he was out of the house would be my own wounds.

I soon found out a few days after the first few beatings that my father just didn't use his feet and hands. If he was really riled up he'd use anything he could reach—porcelain lamps; the shards cutting my hands as I tried to protect myself and pick them up afterwards, kitchen knives; sliced across my body, burning gas stoves; reddened fingers and white spots on my skin, any glassware that came to hand; my arms and legs suffered the most from that, and, as a lasting cold memory, the cheese grater; unique marks across my chest and back. I suspected that that was his favorite to use. The only thing I d about the times he used objects was that they almost always created white or red scars that stained my skin, possibly to remain for eternity. The bruises eventually healed of course, but never the scars.

It was true that the only scar on my entire body whose story I truly wanted to relive was the everlasting X on my face. Every time I would come across a mirror that age old feeling of a dagger twisting in your heart would greet me in a painful way, and I always looked in the other direction.

School was alright. Nobody ever questioned me about if something were wrong at my house, because nobody knew that I was acting very strangely than my normal self. I made no friends whatsoever, in hopes that if I had to leave this school again, I wouldn't be breaking other people's hearts. There was one girl, with deep crimson-orange hair and slate gray eyes by the name of Tara that talked to me a few times. She understood that I would rarely reply, but this didn't seem to bother her. A close friend of hers (who I assumed to be her boyfriend) was also friendly to me. Tara let me sit at her table at lunch since all the others were pretty much full and wouldn't exactly accept a boy who didn't talk. It seems wrong to say it, but I liked Tara. She knew what she was doing and had a real good hold on life as a tom boy. However, I could only think of one person when I saw her, and it shouldn't take a genius to figure out who.

Aside from Tara and her friends' acceptance, I had other escapes from my father's dark hand. At night, regardless the situation, I had always unpacked a spare notebook from my bag. Grabbing a stray pencil, I would always begin to doodle in my notebook. Under normal circumstances, I would write instead of doodle, but because writing could in turn become very dangerous for me if my father ever went through my things, I drew instead.

I never was a very good artist. Odd was the official sketcher of our group, as no one else seemed to be good at it. (I thought I saw one of Yumi's plant drawings once, but she was in such a hurry to pack it up that I wasn't sure about anything…) I must admit, my first few drawings were pretty awful, but the more time I spent on it, the better I got. Since I could never get any sleep no matter how I tried, about seven to eight hours of the night was spent drawing. Then, around four, four-thirty or so, I would finally find enough drowsiness to let me release into slumber for the rest of the morning until I was forced to wake up.

Two years.

Two years of putting up with my father, beating after beating, bruise after bruise, scar after scar. Two years of putting up with awful noises from the other room. Two years of silence, with no moral support of friends. Two years of approving teachers who nodded at my improved school work, which I did to please my father so he wouldn't be as angry. Two years of hiding in the moonlight, drawing relentlessly until dawn. Two years of silently noticing all the return trips taken by my friends, and doing nothing. Two years of knowing they were fighting for everyone's lives, and doing nothing. Two years of missing them, and doing nothing. Two years of wrenching heartache, and doing nothing.

Two years of nothing, until the final night.

Screams, yelling, and my father punching at me, trying to get to my mother who was behind (under, actually) me; for our family it was just another normal night. But something about this savage monotony changed something in me. I grew infuriated all within a few minutes, and the began to pound in my ears as I slowly rebelled against my father, unsteadily standing up as he kept beating at me. It was all coming down to this…

"Don't…," I growled, "_touch me!!!_"

Before I knew it, my father lay unconscious against the wall, with my knuckles burning like crazy from smashing into his face.

**Hard: It's a core. It's as hard as rocks. It's located in the brain.**

**Jeremy defect.**

Silence reigned supreme as my mother and I stared at what I had done. Suddenly, after my huge adrenaline rush, I felt stupid, and, dare I say it, scared. When my father woke up, who knew what would become of me? How could I be so _stupid_ to react to impulses like that when I clearly knew the consequences**[A/N: Say it with me now, O RLY ULRICH?** I was just on the edge of panicking, when my mother grabbed me from behind and turned me around in a tight hug.

"Ulrich…," she sobbed, "Oh Ulrich, what have you done…Oh…I have to call the school…, Ulrich, go upstairs, gather your possessions, go, go!"

I felt so confused as her tears plopped onto my head. Call the school? For what? Gather my possessions? What was she planning?

After a while I decided to hold back my questions and just go and do what she told me. I over heard her on the phone, talking to someone. Granted, I couldn't understand her because her voice was muffled, but there was one thing I thought I heard that totally twisted my head all the way around and back.

"Kadic…Delmas, please…,"

Boy, did I need to clean out my ears or what? The shock that I had from punching my father must've really made me scatterbrained. Now I was hallucinating that my mom was talking to Mr. Delmas. Ha ha. I needed to get out more.

Since I had very few belongings that fit into a duffel bag, it didn't take me long to pack and trudge down the stairs, still confused about this whole business about school and packing. My mom had just hung up when she turned around to see me standing in the door way. She held something close to her chest, but I couldn't see what it was. Tears began to well up once again in her eyes, but for a much different reason than before.

"I love you, Ulrich…,"

"Yeah, Yeah mom I do too…,"

"Ulrich…go back. Go back to your other life." She pleaded.

"Wait, Mom, what? What do you mean—,"

"Kadic, Ulrich, go back to Kadic. You know the way. Go to Kadic and leave this place far behind you. Go back to your friends. Please, just go back…," Mom revealed whatever she was holding close to her chest, and handed it to me. I choked back a sob as I saw a picture of me and all of my friends crammed into one tiny photo booth. It was from the exact same day that I got my dog tags. I reached out a shaking hand and took it from my mother's, finding myself unable to tear my eyes away from it. We were all smiling, more or less, as the camera took our picture. I was smushed up against the wall by Yumi, who was in turn smushed against me by Odd, who was making a peace sign in the camera lens. Jeremy was behind me and Yumi, uneasily grinning as he tried to keep his balance. Aelita was in between Odd and Yumi in the back, still confused on what the photo booth was doing. I swear I can still hear the laughter coming from the picture's ink. I never really realized how much they meant to me, or how much I missed them.

"Ulrich, I…," My mother started. I looked up to see her green eyes spilling out a lot of tears.

"When you leave, you…you can't go like this. You have to change your name, change your past. He will find you if you stay like this. You must listen to me, and change everything you ever thought you knew. Do you understand?"

I nodded slowly. Her plan was all coming together now. I didn't like it, but it was much better than getting scraped by cheese graters.

"Here…I prepared a name for you. Your middle name is Parker, that name has no connection to our family. Last name, Anders is what I said. It…It was my mother's maiden name. And your first…," Mom stopped to take in a shaky, teary breath. "Your first is your current middle name. Reese…," Her gaze drifted off into dreamland, even though she still talked to me.

"Reese…do you know why your middle name is that?" She asked me. Too shocked to speak, I just shook my head slowly. I never knew there was a meaning behind my name. "When your father and I first had a real 'date', so to speak, we were college students, you know, poor. As a very first gift to me he gave…he gave me a package of Reese's Peanut Butter cups," Her eyes diverted back to me. "I guess…back then it really meant a lot to me," She finished. I could feel my chest constrict as she kept talking. I knew the end was coming soon.

"Make your own past, and make it good. Go back to your friends and forget this. Build yourself a new life, just go, and don't come back, don't even look back." My mom hugged me one last time, trying to hold back all her sorrows.

"Mom…," I mumbled, "I will remember you," Honestly, I couldn't think of anything to say except for that. My mother pulled away from me, still holding me close. She planted a kiss on my forehead, holding it for about a minute before letting go of me.

"There's no reason to remember me…," My mother said. There was another moment of silence, then, she let me go, with no other words to say. I started to race down the darkened damp streets, the hairs on the back of my neck prickling from feeling her eyes on me, prickling from the everlasting touch of her lips on my forehead, and finally, prickling from the chill of her final words to my goodwill.

_There's no reason to remember me._

**CONFIDENCE: Believe in yourself. You'll find it will make many positive changes for you.**

**And Yumi too.**

A brisk, cold autumn wind ruffled my black jacket and unkempt russet hair as I stood at the front gates of Kadic.

I wasn't sure if I prepared for this. I was going to cut myself off from the world with the first few steps into the schoolyard. There was no way I could bear reconnecting with my friends, even with my alias. They were sure to find out eventually if I started acting friendly toward them. I wasn't worried about them recognizing me. I hardly recognized myself looking back on two years. As far as anything goes, I was safe, as long as I didn't drop hints everywhere—on purpose, or on . I imagined myself as a ghost, ready to take on life again from a totally different angle. However, I wasn't sure that this was going to work. I wasn't sure on how long I could keep in hiding; keep myself in fear's cage. Keep myself from going insane. I just wasn't sure about anything, except for one hard fact.

I was home.

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If you want to know what Ulrich looks like when he gets to Kadic as "Reese Anders" go to my profile, click on SWEET and click on Browse Gallery until you get to the one entitled AHAH LOOK IT'S ULRICH.

I don't think I need to explain any more. (sweatdrop)


	5. Rock

Next chaaapter! Hooray for, ah, nevermind.

I listened to the Hare Hare Yukai during most of this chapter. XD

* * *

Chapter 5: Rock

_Emotionless_

I went straight to Mr. Delmas's office, duffel bag still slung over my weary shoulder. The secretary didn't give me a second look after I said that Reese Anders was here to check in for the school year. I peeked at her computer screen and noticed that she was indeed very busy…playing solitaire, that is. It was pretty early in the morning, about 6:35, but it didn't give her an excuse to start playing games during her job.

I took a seat in one of the waiting chairs, letting my bag slide off onto the tile floor, exhausted. I had ran half of the way here nonstop with the duffel bag, and only when I felt the presence of my mother's eyes completely leave the back of my neck did I slow down to a fast-paced walk. Eventually I reached the gates of Kadic, but they were already closed for the night. I had chosen a near-by bench and, using my duffel bag as a pillow, I camped out there for the rest of the night, counting the stars in the sky to ease my exploding nerves. I guess I dozed off for a while, but it was a light sleep. I awoke at the wee hours of dawn, half-refreshed and ready to at least tackle a meeting with Mr. Delmas.

I sighed as I fiddled with my fingerless gloves, tugging and scratching at them constantly. I wasn't used to the feeling of wearing them, because I had never needed them to cover up multiple scars. Back at the public school they didn't exactly allow gloves, so I always kept my hands to themselves. No one ever said a thing to me there, but I was almost sure that they would here.

A yawn escaped my mouth as I kept an eye on the wall clock. Ten lousy, boring minutes passed before Mr. Delmas finally decided to show up to work today. He gave me a look, then quietly asked the secretary who I was. It took her a minute to cover up her solitaire game, and then another minute to recall who I was. I rolled my eyes and stood up.

"I'm Reese Anders. I'm here to check in for the rest of the school year," I said, finalizing the situation. Mr. Delmas's face went 'Ohhhh' and he invited me into the office, motioning that my bag could be left outside. I took it with me into the office.

Mr. Delmas asked me a bunch of questions, writing down all my answers. The only reason why he did this, he claimed, was that because he didn't have any parent contact. In fact, that was the first question he asked: Did I have any parent contact?

"No," I answered bluntly. He questioned me further.

"No I don't,"

"Guardians, Grandparents? Any of those?"

"No,"

"Orphanage?"

"My mother talked to you last night,"

"Can't I contact her then?"

"No,"

"Why not?"

"No,"

Mr. Delmas tapped his pencil as he stared at me. I returned his stare with no emotion whatsoever, never blinking. Finally he sighed, glancing down at his paper, and let it go. I secretly let out a breath of relief, and answered all the other questions. It wasn't long before Mr. Delmas nodded and I signed a paper saying that I would abide by Kadic's rules. It took me a minute to come up with a good signature with my new name, but Mr. Delmas didn't really seem to care.

Jim came into the room almost two seconds after Mr. Delmas had called him, telling me that he would show me to my room and around the school. As we walked he began to talk about Kadic's history, as well as his when he was working as a gym teacher. There were about five times when I caught him saying "I'd rather not talk about that," and going off on something different. I hid a smile as I listened to him. At least he didn't change.

My heart became a little wary as we got closer to my new dorm. The steps were all too familiar as we walked along, and the doors eerily coming back in my memory. Jim paused at a single, foamy green door, and pounded on it.

"Della Robbia, you lazy head! You've got a new room mate! Open up, will ya?"

Moaning and groaning were heard from the inside as Odd's sleepy voice called wearily out, "Ohhh, come on, Jim! I thought you had a key!"

"Now, Della Robbia, you know that the skeleton key's been missing for ages! Open up, now! Don't keep us waiting!" My throat twisted up into a knot. Oh, being here under alias is bad enough. Now I have to spend my nights with the King of Snore, my once-best friend. They sure don't make it easy.

The first thought that screamed through my head when Odd opened the door was, _Holy…Mother…of…God…Odd cut his hair…_I almost had to clamp a hand over my mouth to prevent myself from saying those exact words in front of them. I stared as he rubbed his squinted eyes in the light, noticing that not only had he cut his hair, but basically pierced his face too. What the hell happened while I was away?

The light shone on his eyebrows, showing me one of them pierced with a ring that came with little ball on it, while the other one was simply pierced with a hoop and a straight-through little pole thing. Okay, so maybe that's not piercing your face, but it's pretty darn close enough for me.

"Aw, Jim, it's so early…," he moaned, "Why'd he hafta come now?"

Jim gave Odd a smirk and burst into the room. Odd stumbled back, dressed in only his boxers. I tried hard not to gag as the room smelled of his god awful feet. Following uneasily behind Jim, I slid my stuff onto the bed that he indicated for me. As soon as he did he began rattling off the rules with as much memory as he could, while Odd mumbled and clambered back into bed, curling up into a skinny ball. I sat on the bed while Jim finished up the basics, my mind drifting off as I stared into space. I was back at Kadic, sure. But should I really be here?

My mother's green eyes and pale, frightened face flashed in my mind, and I suddenly had the urge to run straight back to her, even though I knew that I would be relentlessly running into a brick wall should I return. Burning white flashes of horrid memories furiously blinked in my mind; but just before I began to feel a pain overload from the flashes, Jim cleared his throat, and closed his statement.

"With that said, school begins at 7:30. Wake-up time is seven sharp. Got that?"

"Yes, sir…," I mumbled in reply. Jim gave me a strange look, as if he was contemplating if he'd seen me before, but then left the room, slamming the door behind him. Not ten seconds passed until Odd leaped out of his bed, bright-eyed and bushy tailed, eager to greet his new room mate.

"Okay, man, Jim gave you his rundown, let me give you mine! Kiwi's my dog, he sleeps in the drawer. Pets aren't allowed here, so that means Kiwi doesn't exist, got it?" he said hyperactively.

"Uhh…," I replied. Odd kept firing away.

"Second of three: You're the second person I've ever had as a room mate, so congrats! Just don't touch my stuff, okay?"

I watched as he pulled out his drawers and lifted Kiwi out, showing me his stuff. No room mate after I left? Did he just open my room this year or something?

"Okay, third, last, and most important!" he exclaimed, getting two inches away from my face. I leaned back as his morning breath swathed over my face, the back of my mind screaming on how discomforting this was. Odd didn't seem to notice as he laid out the most important rule, "See that dog tag hanging over my bed? You are not to touch that, ever. Permission or not, got it?"

I glanced over his shoulder to see my old dog tag draped over a nail in the wall, gently swinging back and forth.

"Is someone in your family in the army or something?" I asked, sounding clueless. Odd threw back his head and laughed.

"Nope, far from it! Maybe one of these days I'll tell you, 'kay?" he said, jumping back onto his bed while grasping a slightly-aged Kiwi, making him dance. Did he just drink one of those hyper energy drinks or something? The ones that have the warnings on the can? This was way too hyper for him in the morning. As I contemplated his sanity, I began to quietly pack away my clothes and few belongings into the dresser and drawers. When my fingers brushed the old photo booth picture, I quickly stuffed it into my pillowcase before Odd could notice. My heart began to thump a thousand miles an hour, like it does when you know you're hiding something that might get you in trouble. I sucked in a very nervous breath and tossed my 'drawing notebook' onto my bed. Odd had gotten bored playing with Kiwi, and wandered over to look over my shoulder.

"Hey—those are pretty good!" he said, pointing to sketchy drawings of people I saw on the street a week or two back. "There are some things that need tweaking, but I can help you with that."

"Really?" I asked. Odd gave me a light punch in the shoulder as he continued, "Why sure! Buddy, you're looking at Odd Della Robbia, Kadic's very own Salvador Dali!"

I held my breath and blinked many times to control my laughter. Somehow, even Dali's weirdness didn't seem to hold a candle to Odd's insanity.

ARTISTIC: It's okay. All great artists were insane.

Odd's just normal.

Odd gave me a grand tour of Kadic, pointing out each thinkable class, office, and break room. I was a little disappointed to hear that the new rec room that was installed a week before I left had officially crashed since kids got the idea to skip school by going there. Odd calls it the great fire, because his favorite pin ball machine was the first to go, and when Jim and another moving/garbage guy threw it into the truck, it gave a burst of short electric flame before it finally broke forever. I gave him a look of sympathy before finishing the tour. Sealing my lips was all I could do to protect my real identity. It was sad, but true.

When we were done, Odd led me into the courtyard, where Jeremy and Aelita were waiting for him to arrive. He gave a huge wave and smile as we approached; I just stared with the slightest start of the latter tugging at the edges of my lips.

As my friends came into detail, I tried not to comment on how good they looked. Aelita grew out her hair so it was probably past shoulder length by an inch, though she had it up in a ponytail, leaving two shorter locks of bangs on either side of her face. Her eye color had shifted from a bright aquamarine to a grayer, prettier sea foam color that reflected light like rainbow diamonds. She wore a darker, pinkish purple colored cotton shirt underneath a long knee-length knitted sweater coat that was a multi-hued pink and dusty rose color, the belt strings that connected to it tied loosely at the waist. She wore blue jean capris with embroidered pink butterflies and flowers along the cuffs, while she still had her shin-high pink boots that I remember well from last time. Her face looked baby-soft, making her look quite a few years younger than what she really was.

Some of Jeremy's geekiness was left behind, but most of it wasn't. His glasses were replaced with contacts, though something told me he still wore them from time to time, and his hair was just a tad bit shorter and a little more styled than before. He wore tan cargo shorts with a teal and blue striped collared polo shirt with a pocket on the left chest. The shoes looked a size too big for him, but the socks looked twice that big as they spilled out from over the lips of the shoes, even when he struggled to keep them up. He still had his good old laptop bag with him, and every so often he would check up on it now and then, as a sort of precaution. It was also apparent that he still had his major crush on Aelita, though it may have matured into a bit more by now.

Before I could open my mouth, Odd began to blabble about all he knew about me. Even though it wasn't much, it was enough of a jerk to make me remember that 'oh yeah, I'm supposed to be _silent._' I waited, diverting my eyes to the park in the background while Odd started to stumble over himself.

"And…um, and um…oh, holy crap!"

"What is it?" Aelita asked, blinking with a hint of a smile on her face. Ugh. Her voice was a little too dream-like for my hormones. Sue me, I'm a guy!

Odd shuffled his feet and elbowed my arm, "Um, I just realized I gave you an entire tour without knowing your name," he whispered nervously. I blinked and gave him a quick glance, straightening out my thoughts before I replied.

"It's…Anders, Reese Anders," I said, almost slipping up and saying 'Ulrich.' I shook my head, looking at the woods once again after all 'introductions' were made, regardless if I already knew them or not. (I almost fell backward when I heard Jeremy's voice—it had gone through that oh-so-special change while I was gone)

Some mindless gossip was traded between the three, when Odd said something that quickly jolted my eyes away from the marvel of trees.

"Hey, Yumi! Over here!"

The bright, Monday morning sun glittered on cropped raven hair that she had let grow a little less than an inch over the past two years. She was struggling to straighten a black denim jacket over a seemingly frillier shirt than I would normally imagine her wearing. Her pants were still black with a slight flare near the ankle, with the left pant leg sporting an intricate red cherry blossom design. Her shoes still remained the same, painful looking thick boots that more than once bruised my face in past sparring matches. To put it in a less perverted way, Yumi had noticeably matured, her face gentle but strong and her body in excellent shape. In fact, the most noticeable difference about this oriental beauty was that two front locks of her hair were dyed in a deep red which complimented her slick hair and wardrobe. A finishing touch was that, if possible, her milk chocolate eyes had become dark chocolate.

And…did she shrink over the two years, or did I grow five inches?

Aelita shook her head as Yumi drew near, smoothing her jacket down, "I still don't understand why you rebel against the shirts your mother got you last year, Yumi. They're really nice,"

Yumi looked up, letting out a whoosh of air, "Nice for you, maybe. Honestly, there's only one shirt I kind of like out of the entire collection, and that's this one with the fire kanji on the front, and if you must know I despise the…frilly sleeves." She said, spitting out the last two words. Was it just me, or was Yumi a little more bitchy than usual?

Before I could ponder this more, she was spitting at me without warning, "You, new kid. Got here last night, didn't you? Must be Odd's new room mate. Lucky you stuck with feet bomb over there." I blinked in surprise. Well, now.

Aelita stood up, placing a hand on Yumi's shoulder. "Hiroki must've pranked you again this morning. What was it this time? Stealing diaries or messing up alarm clocks?"

Yumi swiveled around, anger flaring in her dark eyes. Yikes. Sounds like Hiroki was becoming worse than Odd. Maybe Odd was even his mentor.

"That stupid little boy stole my eighth and ninth grade photo album, Aelita!" she hissed. Suddenly Aelita, Jeremy, and Odd switched moods, as Aelita nodded sagely.

"Ah, well, that is an excuse to be this bothersome about…," she said, totally letting Yumi get away with her attitude. It took me a moment to click about what was so important about this album when I realized that eighth and ninth grades were the year and a half that the Lyoko group had five members. My gaze drifted to the dirt. Yumi sucked in a huge breath, held it for a second, then blew out, calming herself down.

"New kid," she began, softer this time. I looked up at her, waiting for her to continue, "Sorry about that. Little brother's a monster. My name's Yumi, my family is from Japan,"

"Reese," I replied rather seriously. A smirk twisted her face, and she pushed me from the shoulder, making me back up a step.

"Odd, I don't know how you'll survive, this guy's a rock. Dead serious, just look at him!" Odd shrugged, making a little cuckoo sign around his ear for no apparent reason. Yumi blinked a few times at me, then asked,

"You look familiar, have I seen you before?"

Don't...panic…Reese. You panic, you die.

"I've never seen you before," I replied, then hastily adding, "I've been in a public school until now." Yumi stared at me some more, as if she knew her gaze was twisting my guts to an expert Boy Scout knot of supreme discomfort. She blinked one more time, then shrugged.

"Sorry, it's just I only know of one other person with green eyes like yours…," she said softly, her voice trailing off. It was apparent she didn't talk about my…"alter ego" much. Judging by the faces of Jeremy and Aelita, nobody did.

Odd, being a natural optimist, hated this state of saddened serious quiet period, and so he slapped me square in the lower back, making me arch it and give a small shout. News flash: he hit a big bruise with the force of an elephant.

"Okay, Reese, I gotta show you to the first classroom! So, toodleloos, ladies!"

Jeremy stood up in annoyance as if to challenge Odd. "First of all, you_already_ gave him an entire tour of the school, and second of all, _I'm not of the female gender_!" Odd gave a nonchalant I-don't-care glance over his shoulder as he led me away, speaking as if he really couldn't see Jeremy there anyways.

"Oh, Jeremy, I almost missed you. You should talk more often, you know?"

KNOWLEDGE: Knowledge is power; and in some circumstances, scary power.

Pink haired girls can be really scary.

The most probable thing I absolutely hate about this school is the funding.

Apparently, they didn't have enough finances to provide two separate different-roomed health teachers for the ninth and tenth grades here at Kadic Academy. The all-intelligent solution to this dilemma was to mish-mash the ninth and tenth graders together in one health class with one teacher. It would've been straight fine with me, if the powerful guy upstairs didn't have some sort of sick sense of humor.

First, Odd was my room mate. Honestly it didn't bother me much because I had a lot of practice in ignoring him. Rooming with him was just a mild discomfort.

But_this.__This_, my friend, is what's considered _bad shit_.

I know, I know, sue me I swore once again. But seriously, sitting me next to Yumi _in health class_ when I'm doing all I can to have us avoid each other at all costs just makes me want to puke off to the side. Sheesh kabobs. Ignore my consent, please.

Other than that, for my first week at Kadic, things went pretty well. Oh yes, there were times when I felt a pang of the past when I would secretly see Jeremy and the others dash off into the park whenever strange crap started to happen here, but I was doing very well in avoiding my friends. I sat alone in some sort of table in the corner for lunch, to which Odd complained about the first day, but as always I ignored him. The one thing that I had forgotten about, however, was something that a special someone made sure that I would never ever forget about or ignore again.

It turns out that, two years on me or not, Sissy still found me as the hottest guy in the school. Sure, she thought I was a stone silent emotionless complete and utter stranger from Madagascar or something, but that didn't stop her from dubbing me "her" property for the time being, as I said nothing against it. Sometimes, people just can't take a hint when someone ignores you.

There were a few times were Yumi tried to strike up an actual lively conversation with me, but as always I discreetly found a way to crush it to dust before it actually began. More often than not she received a cold shoulder from me, and go ahead and call me an ass because of it, but it was because I considered her the most dangerous of the group. I just couldn't imagine what would happen if I slipped and allowed myself to get closer to her and she suddenly found out who I really was.

No matter how hard I tried, however, there wasn't a way for me to sleep soundly at night. During the day it was fine, because I had distractions that pushed my nightmares to the back of my mind, but at night, thought was dominant. It was impossible—literally impossible—for me to push away the gruesome fearful images of my mother under the dark shadow of my father back at my house, with no one to throw themselves in between her and the iron fist of abuse. When I was asleep, the images became worse as they were accompanied with sound effects and harsh backgrounds that usually consisted of a post-apocalyptic-looking city with flames and smoke in the distance. Most of the time the nightmares would just be quick flashes of imagery pain and injuries, but it was enough to wake me up in the middle of the night—the nights when I actually did fall asleep.

Usually, after Odd collapsed somewhere in the room and started to snore, I would sneak out past Jim and all of the hall monitors to go and spend the 'dark hours' in the park. I visited the park so frequently between night and day that I nearly knew just about every tree and rock that was in there. Being there gave me more than enough time to think and plan on how my new life—my new identity—would run. Somehow, however, whenever I tried to concentrate on that, my thoughts would drift to the one place I never wanted to think about for the sheer reason that I shouldn't go back there, even if I wanted to.

Mother…

No matter how much I kicked her away from my head, she would always return one way or another. Each time I managed to fight back, until something drastically dire happened. I find it ironic that I first 'learned' about it in one of my nightmares, but that's just the way things play out sometimes. Wishing for it to change will never, ever, be glanced upon by whoever controls the stars up there. In short, my nightmare became reality.

I swear the stars were blood red that night. Maybe I didn't notice it at first, but then, this was one of the nights that I was inside my dorm. It was the end of my second week back at Kadic, and things had gone rather smoothly as far as creating a whole different personality for me. Odd had recently just fallen asleep on a whimpering Kiwi who had stupidly wandered into his lap just as he toppled forward onto the bed into unconsciousness, trapping the rat-dog underneath. Rolling my eyes, I managed to get a wink or so of sleep as I faced the old, off-white wall of my dorm.

Not surprisingly, it wasn't long before the familiar scene of my desolated nightmare cursed my slumber. I was standing in the usual spot, in a clearing of the apocalyptic destruction, turning in circles, knowing something was about to happen. The flames were way closer now, as I could sense the heat as they burned scraps no less than fifteen feet away. As I was turning myself around, I noticed a stumbling, incomplete figure step through the fire toward me. It resembled my mother, but its skin was pasty and paler than it should've been, while its eyes were devoid of pupils with an old parchment wash to them. The mouth was long, narrow, and stretched, blood red and gushy. When it opened it to speak, the voice was close to Mom's, only it was rasping and parched.

"R…Reese…," it called. I shook my head.

"No, stop, don't call me that!"

"Reese…,"

"That's not my name! Stop, please! I'm Ul—," I tried to say my name, but halfway through it, I forgot what it originally was. I struggled with my mind as the zombie thing came closer. It reached out a diseased, bulging claw-hand toward my chest, and I took a step back.

"You've left me…Reese," it cried, rasping its words in solemnity.

"No, you told me to go! I would never leave you!" I protested, trying to step back further but feeling the fire getting closer by the second.

"Look what you've done…you've done to me!" it hissed, the crawly voice rising in volume. I stumbled a bit, crying out as its claw lashed out and grabbed my shirt and chest, digging into my skin. Hot liquid ran down my torso as I locked my fearful gaze into its emotionlessly eternal eyes. The heat of the fire started to burn my hair as it tilted my head way back. Panic struck my chest, and my breath rate sped up to way beyond normal.

"You've killed me, Reese! Killed me!" it shrieked.

"I…,"

"You'll never rid yourself of the blood on your hands!"

My voice choked and croaked as its claws dug into my chest, twisting and turning. Before I could scream, the fire completely closed in around us, burning us both into oblivion. The tears on my face turned to boiling steam as my mouth opened in a silent screech. Then, I woke up.

I was in a literal puddle of sweat. My sheets were drenched to the mattress, and my pajamas only had a few dry spots left. Hair was damp, and armpits were smelly. Eyes were wild, and heart was racing. I was really messed up.

As quietly as I could, as so not to wake Odd and Kiwi (who had eventually found salvation in sleeping under Odd's scrawny torso) I got dressed and stalked outside into the woods to spend the rest of my Saturday night there. Or so I thought.

Crossing the courtyard was hard, as a billion voices in my head suddenly started to scream _Race to your house, go, go! No one will notice, not even your father! Just go and check up on her, quick, quick!_

I paused, frozen between the gatehouse and the park entrance. I looked to one, then the other, and then let out a breath of frustration. Rubbing my hands together, I easily scaled the gate and dropped down on the sidewalk. Without hesitation, I was on a one-way route to my house.

IMPROBABLE: A phrase geeks use on Star Trek, although it is possible to defy it.

As Jeremy often does.

My house was in a disastrous state.

Everything, I swear, _everything_ that was able to shatter into a million pieces was broken to exactly that, and everything that couldn't was upturned or disturbed. The lights on the main floor were left on, as the light bulb gently swayed from the cool draft in the room. I carefully picked my way through the mess, looking all over at what had once been a tidy place. Glass and ceramic cracked underfoot as I carefully made my way through the living room, not daring to choke out a call. No one was home, and it made the entire place feel uneasily ghostly.

The screen door in the kitchen slammed and I swerved around to find that it was merely the fault of the wind. I wouldn't have given it a second thought, until I saw something smeared on the wood of the door. My eyes widened in horror as my world twisted its shape.

There were blood spots on the floor near the door, and the red liquid was smeared onto the wood. The wind blew again, making the door slam a few more times. I felt like I was a sore actor in a horror movie, yet somehow I knew the blood was real. I unsteadily walked over, realizing that though the blood looked like it had been there for a while, it hadn't quite oxidized yet.

Sweat complimented my trembling hands as I uncertainly pushed the door open, like it was diseased. There was a small blood trail leading from the house to somewhere else, conveniently placed as if someone wanted me to follow it. I traced each splotch with sickened care, making sure my shoes never touched the liquid. The trail led me to a narrow alley a block away from my house, with the stench of dogs and meat heavy in the dark. My nose wrinkled up as I peered into the dark with only the light of a nearby street lamp as my guide.

Half a second later the horrible smell was the exact last thing on my mind.

A feminine body was broken and twisted in sickening ways in the middle of the alley, blood pooled around her. Her face was facing away from me, exposing her bloodied neck and chin. There were some places that her skin was totally scraped off by brutal tears. Her clothes used to be simple, before they were torn to shreds along with the meat of her torso. The rank dog smell suddenly clicked in my head as I estimated what had happened to her, and I became very dizzy. The body was small and petite, but still an adult, with mid-back length russet hair. A hair color that exactly matched mine.

My stomach churned as bile began to crawl up my throat as I half-consciously stumbled into the alley, no longer taking care to step away from blood. I didn't want to confirm who this was, but at the same time, I needed to know. Slowly, dazedly, I picked my way around the alley's junk and the woman's remains so I could clearly see her face. Whatever the dogs were that did this to her, it seemed that they killed her for sport more than for food. Way too much of the 'meat' was left on her for this to be a food fight, so to speak.

Gasping with surprise as I stumbled over an outstretched arm, bile rose up just enough in my throat that some of it flew out of my mouth onto the pavement, scraping my shirt as it fell. I shut my mouth with a clack of my teeth and a slap of my hand, preventing any more from flowing out of my trap. As I tripped forward some more, my gaze caught with the dead woman's. My hand went rigid and began to shake as her green, death gray glazed eyes stared straight at me, a hint of remorse still left in them. Her mouth was open in terror, and her face was scratched up badly. But even so, I saw her. My mother. Dead.

My legs went to oatmeal mode, and I literally fell back, slamming the back of my head on the brick wall. I began to hyperventilate, unable to tear my eyes away from her frozen features. I brought up my knees in some sort of pathetic defense, hugging them tightly to my chest. My heart thumped against my thighs, bile and saliva slowly creeping out the corner of my mouth. I tried to cry, but I was too choked to make any noise. The result was something half-way between crying tears and coughing up bile. My white shoes were stained red, though I didn't mind much as I had a different gray pair in the dorm.

Screaming voices and brutal sound effects bashed around in my poor head, racking my skull back to my horrid nightmare.

_You've killed me, Reese! Killed me!_

_You'll never rid yourself of the blood on your hands!_

_There's no reason to remember me…_

MERCIFUL: Believe it or not, it could eventually win you points in the long run.

Have you ever seen Yumi run?

Dawn found me caked with dried liquid puke, trembling in the dark alley in front of the corpse of my mother. There wasn't one second where I glanced away from the cold stare that her eyes gave me. No, it wasn't until a stray kitty accidentally knocked over an empty garbage can that I finally jolted back to reality, realizing that I had to get to school for morning classes. I was still used to the public schedule; I had forgotten that Kadic had morning school on Saturdays.

Uneasily I staggered to my feet, bending down to my mother's face and taking in her delicate features one last time before I bravely reached out two fingers and closed her eternal eyes. I sniffed and shook away a tear as I straightened up and dashed off in the wee hours of the morning.

Just before I hit Kadic Academy I paused at a garbage can and took off my shoes, burying them deep into the rotting junk that the can held. I don't care if they would be found later, or if they would take me to court because of it. My mind was so out of it and dazed that I couldn't process hardly anything that was going on.

The gate was once more an easily scale up and down, as was weaving my way to Odd's dorm and snatching some clean clothes and shoes along with my shower stuff. I must've stayed in the shower for about forty-five minutes before I felt semi-satisfied that I had gotten the filth off of me. Mechanically I finished my routine just as the early-risers started theirs, and wandered off back to the dorm.

I sat on the bed, lost in thought as I dug out the yin-yang pendant, gazing just past it as the horrible visions clouded my mind from any other thought. So what if Odd saw this—it's not like I would care anymore anyways.

_Don't!_ The smart side of my conscious screamed, _You can't do this now! You've got to keep up this act; if you don't, who knows what sort of chaos would happen? If this was your father's doing, you're in huge trouble if you reveal yourself now! Just wait patiently, the time will come, but it is not now!_

I blinked a few times to clear up my morbid, emo actions. I assured myself that my smart side was right, and shook my head, turning Odd's alarm off and waking him up. It took a while to complete this, but eventually the slime ball rolled out of bed and began to gather his hygiene stuff.

Going through the day without even saying one word was bad enough, but having the uncanny feeling that someone was watching me was even worse. I couldn't tell what was going on or who gave me that uneasy sensation, but I couldn't care less as I used all of my focusing power on my blabbering teachers. The morning flew by without me remembering anything from it, and soon it was lunch. Food here is better than in the public school, but anything that entered my mouth instantly turned to dry ash, reminding me of my fire-abundant nightmares. Looking back, the 'being-watched' sensation was in effect way more here than all day, but I was so engrossed in monotonously eating that I must've missed it.

After I dumped my tray, I gratefully wandered straight into the deep part of the woods. It wasn't long before my senses cleared, and I heard twigs snap behind me in a leisurely way, though I knew what was going on.

Someone was following me.

Forcing myself not to look back, I continued walking for five more minutes before coming to a small clearing with a huge aspen tree to the side. I stopped in front of the tree, and listened. Sure enough, the person behind me stopped too. I could tell they were close. I was about to speak before they beat me to it.

"You may have changed in looks…," A gentle voice softly said with confidence. My throat tightened as she continued, stepping out behind me. I didn't dare turn around.

"…Ulrich,"

* * *

Ooooh! Spooky!

Next Chapter: Attack of the Pandas.

God, shouldn't have trick-or-treated. OMG SUGAR.


	6. Trading Stories

Hello, shortie here. This short chapter is short. I had good endings, but I didn't think there was enough content to not make it short. Just to warn you, shorties, it's short. This is Shortie mcShortPants reporting today, Shorttown, Shortday, on the fourteenth of Shortember.

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Chapter Six: Trading Stories

_Can you keep a secret?_

"But you really haven't changed at all…," she finished. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her smile as she circled around me. I breathed her name in some distant sadness, feeling defeated.

"Aelita…,"

Her smile twitched a tad wider as she stood in front of me, and I let out a crushed breath.

"Am I really that obvious?"

To my relief, Aelita shook her head, "No…as far as I know. I mean, I didn't share with anyone if that's what you were asking. I figured that if you were caring this much to hide yourself, you probably wouldn't want to be found," she ended with a short chuckle, but then sighed.

"But…why?" she asked. I ran my hands through my hair and stuffed them in my pocket, sitting down with my back against one side of the tree. Aelita stared at me for a while, then sat down near me. Silence passed between us, before I took in a breath of preparation and began.

I told her everything, well, almost everything. I started from how I felt when I left, and continued on, editing the abuse scenes and simply saying that 'My dad abused us.' Aelita looked a little sickened by this, especially when I showed her the scars on my arm—the ones that weren't covered up. She put her hand to her mouth in a silent frightened gasp, and gently touched one. I gave a sigh, and fell silent after I told her about Tara and how my mother pushed me out the door to come here. I didn't say anything else, for that wound was still way too deep and bleeding. Aelita gulped to hold back something, and gave a shaky sigh.

"…Aelita, would you mind…telling me what happened…after I left?" Aelita, hand still on her mouth but looking away, thought for a while before nodding and relaxing herself. It was a few moments more before we got launched into a deep friendship conversation, Aelita slowly becoming more comfortable with the idea of my alternate identity.

"After you left, everyone was pretty silent to each other for about a week—Yumi especially. No one could forget how abrupt that happened. It wasn't officially declared, but no one spoke about you after that—at least, not much. Every once and a while, some one would bring it up, but there wouldn't be a reply…and almost always, someone would get up and walk away," I shook my head, and asked,

"Why? I was the most unstable of all of us. I was like the outcast within the group…why would you act like that?"

Aelita stared at me for a while, then gave me a light punch. I was a little surprised at this coming from Aelita, but what she said next made me keep my mouth shut.

"Ulrich—er, Reese, you should know that you were the first one that Jeremy showed the super computer to. You were the one who brought Odd and even Yumi into this. If it hadn't been for you, the group would only consist of you, me, and Jeremy, and I probably would still be on Lyoko right now. Even more than that, Yu—…,"

Aelita looked away, suddenly silent. I stared at her with curiosity, trying to figure out what she was going to say. It started with "yoo," that was for sure. Now all I had to do was try and figure out what she was going to say. You, you're, your, universal, Ukrainian, it couldn't be YouTube, could it?!

"Even more than that…what?" I asked. Aelita bit her lip, struggling to decide whether she should tell me or not.

"I…I promised not to tell," she stuttered. I gave her a skeptical look, but let it be for now. "But anyways…," she continued,

"Sissy got over you leaving kind of quickly…she found other boys to ogle at, such as Theo, and even William. Um…speaking of William he's been trying to get closer to Yumi, with you gone and such. Yumi's accepted some of his comfort, but, uh, she mostly claims that she needs to be alone. So far, he's been okay with that, but recently it seems he's been a little more up-front and maybe aggressive about their relationship and such.

"Jeremy honestly hasn't changed that much. He tries to be an optimist most of the time—making a conscious effort to be light-hearted for everyone's sakes, but he slips every now and then. The war with Xana just keeps on getting more and more complicated, and it drives him nuts sometimes. He doesn't like to show that.

"When Odd reached the age of fifteen, his parents really set him loose. 'Go out, get pierced, get tattoos, we don't care! Just don't drop out.' Obviously, he's complied, and he hasn't dropped out yet. Personality's the same, if not crazier, but…there's always his down side. It's…It's rare, but it really gets you down. It's that powerful.

"Yumi, uh, Yumi's been…down. Depressed. Angry. I don't know what's going on with her. I've only seen this "true side" twice, because of her mask being so strong around school, her family, and, well, us. She's gotten a bit quieter, but she tries to hide it whenever she can. Oh, and, from Monday to Friday she boards here now, but she spends the weekends with her parents."

I processed everything she told me. When she started with William a growl rumbled in my chest, waiting to be released. Even though I didn't really give him a chance to prove himself, I never really liked him.

Jeremy was of no surprise to me—the higher the Xana threat, the higher the stress. It just worried me that Xana and Lyoko might've become something that has hurtled way out of their control. My stomach knotted as I remembered how vicious the attacks could get sometimes. I never wanted to admit it, but Xana scared the living hell out of me.

Odd—well, it was scary to see him at first, but honestly, I should have seen it coming. You know Odd; he'll do anything to be as abnormal as possible.

Yumi surprised me. The most. I said Xana scared the living hell out of me, right? He does, or, he did, but after hearing about Yumi…I'm not so sure. It's not that I was frightened of her in particular now—it's just that I didn't want to hear that Yumi hasn't been doing well after my period of absence. She's strong, I know she is. Then why does it sound like she's suddenly falling apart?

"What about you?" I asked, wanting to keep conversation for just a little longer, "How have you been coping these past two years?" These past, long, two years.

"I've…well, mostly to the others…I've been the counselor for them. It's…mostly why I know what's been going on with them," she sighed, "As for me, I want a counselor of my own. It's kind of hard, you know…without my own personal refuge. I've been feeling, hurt sometimes. Boxed up, just a tool used by people sometimes. Jeremy, every now and then, reminds me that I'm more than that, but…it's still hard for me,"

I stared off into the distance. I don't know how long she had kept these feelings inside, but in my opinion these feelings were very un-Aelita-ish. Then again, some of my more recent feelings might have been very un-Ulrich-ish.

But was I really Ulrich anymore?

As we sat there in silence, I couldn't help but wonder if I was still Ulrich, or if I had changed to someone else entirely. Maybe I'm Reese now, and all traces of Ulrich have been lost. I looked down at my hands, seeing past the gloves to the marred scars underneath. Two years ago, these hands would've been clean of anything evil. They would be innocent, young, defiantly eager. Now, it's like their entire identity changed. I look at them now and I see deformity, insanity, horror, and, dare I say it, blood.

Uncomfortable feelings laced through me like a virus, some weeping, some pleading, but most were screaming. Screaming with anger and hate. I flexed my fingers in and out of fists, trying to make sense of what this rage was all about. Through my confusion, Aelita reached out and placed one of her soft, delicate hands over mine.

I blinked, breathing hard, and looked up at her in the eyes. Her gray-aqua-rainbow irises flowed with sincerity as she spoke her next words, meaning every letter of it.

"Reese…I know you, and I know you probably won't do this, but please, if you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm here. I'll keep your secret, and I'll never let it out, even under death."

"Aelita…," I said softly with some pain, "I wouldn't have told you everything if I didn't trust you. At this time, you're really the only one I do trust…,"

Aelita stared at me sadly, warmth edging out from her cool eyes. Her lips trembled with…well, I don't know what, but I was assured that it was some form of sadness or desperation.

"Will you…will you tell Yumi?" she asked me. I shook my head, dropping my gaze to her hand that covered mine.

"I can't…out of all of you, she's the biggest threat. If my father ever came looking for me…I don't want him to know that I was ever close to her. What he would do…I can't imagine. He never took the Orientals well—ever. If he learned that I…that one of my friends was from Japan…I don't know. I just can't let anyone know. He's…he's just so unpredictable…,"

Aelita squeezed my hands, never taking her gaze off of me, "I…I don't know how, but I understand. Please remember, though, I'm here for you,"

I mouthed the word 'remember' a few times, closing my eyes as my mind involuntarily jumped to the last night I saw my mother.

"I'm here for you…," Aelita said again. A few seconds passed, and then she stood up, brushing herself off. She gave me one last sad look, then jogged off back to the school. I sat there and rested my head against the tree trunk.

_Remember…_

If I really were to die sometime soon, would anyone remember me? And if they would, who would I be to them?

Ulrich Stern?

Or Reese Anders?

OPTIMISM: A feeling of the need to brighten the mood of those around you.

A rare Oddity that we need more of.

Next time we had health class I got there early, sitting down in my assigned seat, waiting for Yumi to show up. A few kids all around me were chatting about the most nonchalant things, it made me feel like an outcast, because when I do talk to someone, it's about my grueling past and my petrified present. Way more dramatic than even Sissy's conversations.

I tapped my pencil on my notebook, resting my head in my hand as I watched the red second hand on the clock tick by. As soon as it hit the twelve, the first bell rang as a warning for students to get back into class. I massaged my jaw, watching as the rest of the teenagers began to flood the room, taking their seats separately. After the main flow of kids slowed down to a trickle, Yumi finally showed up in the doorway. I gave her a quick glance, feeling my cheeks flush as I numbly turned away.

After all, the white half of our yin-yang shards shined glossily in the classroom light, carelessly bouncing against her chest in time to the steps she took. Underneath my shirt, my own yin-yang shard felt so cold it burned hotly against my heart. I sucked in a breath of cool air, trying to slow my pounding vessels and loosen my tightened muscles. She had kept it, and she bore the pendant with pride. Why hadn't I noticed it before?

She didn't greet me as she sat down, which was, in fact, a little strange for her. Almost every time either she or I sat down she would greet me in some sort of way, cheerful or not. I gave her another glance, seeing if I could sift any feelings out. All I saw was dark rings under her eyes, and a hint of contempt crossing her face. She stared straight ahead at the chalkboard, not even acknowledging that anyone else was there. I blinked a few times, then shrugged, guessing that it was a Xana attack last night—or some sort of Lyoko mission, whichever.

The lesson in health class was, to be polite, _downright horrid_. Yes, today was the day, the day of "the talk." The great thing about being older was that they didn't separate the genders, sending the girls to one room and the boys to another. No, they had to do it with both genders present. No exceptions.

Our health teacher apparently liked to cover _everything_, from STDs to slang. Most of the time I had my head in my hands, my fingers buried in my hair and applying severe pressure on my skull as she went through the things that could possibly happen. Jesus Christ, you can't say one thing without her launching into a long preachy speech about every possible detail known to man. Some of the immature boys in the class were always giggling off to the side as she talked. Most of the girls looked sick.

Yumi and I were severe outliers for our genders.

Everything for Yumi just went in one ear and out the other as her mind was lost in la-la land, which was way different than the rest of the females who were, strangely enough, all ears. I just wished that I could be in her position, because it was extremely uncomfortable for me to be talking about this sitting right next to _her_ and having quite a…interesting past. Not giggling off to the side must have been strange for a boy of my age as well. The luxury of la-la land was lost to me as every detail the teacher explained was hammered into my head like a railway spike into the ground. Each word hurt, and each explanation sent fifty sweat droplets dribbling down my face. Don't get me started on how I felt when she actually got past the first subject.

When that wretched class finally released us, everyone burst out of the room, running each other over to get as far away from that place as possible. Unfortunately for us, Yumi and I were the last to leave.

Yumi walked stiffly and rather zombie-ishly A/N: Bre zombie joke: number 14 as if she wasn't even there. As I uneasily bustled passed her at the door way and into the hall, I chanced a look at her eyes to check to see if she was a clone or not. Good news was she was Yumi Ishiyama and not some computer virus.

Bad news was that her eyes were red, puffy, and dry from the results of crying possibly all night.

Being out of character from the shock, I was about to ask her what was wrong before she turned in the opposite direction and disappeared into the crowd of teenagers. It wasn't long before I too was swept away in the forced current of adolescent boarders.

Yumi's expression puzzled me for the next class before lunch. I didn't pay attention to a word the math teacher said as I was certainly focused on what I had seen coming out of the health classroom. Sad to say, my first thought was _Did Aelita tell?_ and I had truly thought that for half the period, even though more than half my brain screamed that she would never do that. Questions raced through my head, all without answers.

Unanswered questions, every single one of them; until about lunchtime.

There was a crowd around Jim as he set up a good-sized TV, switching the channels until he found a national news one. I picked up a tray, not thinking much of it as Rosa served me some fish and chips. The murmured voices of kids demanded for Jim to turn it up, and with some grunting, Jim did. Unexpectedly, the entire cafeteria went silent. I took a cue, and listened.

"…Bob, are you sure that Meria Stern's son was the one that did the killing?"

I coughed, clenching my lunch tray. People shushed me within an instant.

"We can't be for sure, but his DNA is all over the evidence scene. Meria's husband doesn't know what to think—,"

_My ass…_I interrupted in my head.

"—except for the fact that Ulrich Stern is indeed missing—oh, oh wait, something's just in! LeeAnn, do you recall the unidentified body we found in the river near the abandoned factory?"

The news anchor lady responded with confusion, "Well, yes, but why?"

"The body of the person found in the river belongs to that of the very boy in question, _Ulrich Stern!!_"

Solid, dead, horrified, silence. The newscast rolled on, but no one paid attention—least of all me. Yumi did nothing but slam down her tray at the table, obviously furious, or, perhaps, just trying to be furious to cover something else up. Sissy began to burst into huge sobbing tears while Hérvé and Nicolas tried to comfort her unsuccessfully. Odd covered his mouth and turned his back to the TV, Jeremy trying to engage himself within his laptop. Aelita gave me one long look, then sat down. I shook my head, gathering the rest of my food.

How could I have been so _stupid_ as to just sit there in front of the corpse of my mother and completely forget that she'll eventually be found, and with my DNA around the house and the alley…who would they think killed her? If my father really had that clean of a getaway…I was screwed! In fact, I'm already screwed!

I'm_dead!!!_

* * *

Ironically, as I was typing this I was listening to My Chemical Romance's song, DEAD! Even more ironic? I love that song. XD Even more ironic? At the end of the song, they randomly break out into LALALALALALA. It's fun. And funny. And stinky. Like my feet.

God, I need a life.

* * *


	7. Dueling Personas

I...I typed most of this today...I mean, it was my only weapon I could use to escape from...Thanksgiving memories. Even so...things just are a little...oh...twitchy, at my house? I really can't think of what to type. I just...not...

(sigh) Pre-Note: Ishiyama could translate to Pebble Mountain in Japanese.

* * *

Chapter Seven: Dueling Personas 

_Fighting my sanity_

Odd snatched me by the elbow, forcing me to plant my butt next to his at the lunch table. I wanted to break away from him, but feared that it would stir some strange suspicion within the group. Though this suggestion was mad, I seriously couldn't think of anything other reason why I needed to get away.

Aelita sat across from me, next to Yumi, who sat next to Jeremy. Jeremy was still fazed by his laptop, though Yumi was staring silently at the screen, her fists clenched in suppressed anger. Aelita was gazing directly at me, as if to say 'why?'

Silence passed between them for a long, painful while. Though I was rather hungry, I found that I couldn't take one bite of the slab of salmon that was on my plate. That was really saying something, since salmon was one of my favorite meals. I poked it around for a while, just waiting for someone to shatter the thick sheet of ice with their tongue.

Tongues of steel, that's what Odd's got.

"It's all a media mistake. Our Ulrich would never—,"

"Shut_up_ Odd!" Yumi interrupted, slamming her fists down into the table, breathing hard. The force of the blow sent even the heaviest trays jittering a few centimeters off the table. My glass of water nearly tipped over, and it was only quick reflexes that saved it from completely spilling over, although I lost half of the water onto the table and over my gloved hand. I flinched as the cold water soaked into the cloth, but I covered that glitch by slowly retreating my hand into my lap.

Odd looked at her, shocked at first, and looking like he might be ready to shut his mouth and just forget about it. I mean, that's what the old Odd I knew would've done. But this Odd, he was different. Sharper, more defiant. Maybe the news he just received rattled him, but his retaliation alarmed everyone down to their toes.

"No, Yumi, _you_ shut up! Shut up, shut up, and shut up!!" Odd shouted, standing up and towering over Yumi, who was still sitting. Her dark chocolate eyes blazed with hateful anger, returning Odd's irate gaze. There was another second of raw stare down before they both broke, screaming at the top of their lungs.

"Odd, you selfish naïve faggot, why can't you keep your trap _shut?!_"

"Oh, I'm a faggot now, okay? Well _excuse me_ but I don't believe purple indicates that I'm _gay_, Pebble Mountain!"

"You're a crock of crap, you know that? Alright, fine, _what gives you the right to talk about him?!_"

"What gives _you_ the right to stop me, oh so mighty Japanese,"

"Don't…," she growled.

"geisha warrior…,"

"Don't…," she warned.

"slant-eyed, bitchy, emo, daughter of a dishonorable fat couch potato who just sits there and stares blankly at your stupid Jap samurai costume!!!"

Yumi's eyes practically burst with the fire of rage as Odd spat his last insult out. As soon as he finished, Yumi let out a blood-curdling scream of sheer fury and leaped clean across the table, bowling into Odd and knocking him straight backward. While he was flying back I saw a glimpse of his face, and my face lit up with worried shock. Odd wasn't scared whatsoever, in fact, his teeth were bared in a challenging way, making Yumi all the more angry. Now, I'm not a religious person in any way, but in that split second where Yumi and Odd were foaming all over each other in fits of rage, I made a very quick, very desperate prayer to any God that would mind hearing my plea for peace between my friends in hopes that it would be considered.

Odd slammed into the table behind us, letting out a grunt and falling back underneath it. Yumi clipped her forehead on the table edge, but she completely ignored it as she grabbed Odd by the lapels, smashing him again and again into the concrete floor. Odd's legs and arms scrambled, hitting and scratching Yumi whenever possible. Aelita, Jeremy and I immediately stood up and surrounded the two, Jeremy standing in silent shock, Aelita desperately trying to pull Yumi off of Odd to no avail, and me standing on the sidelines, burning to help, but not finding the courage to do so.

Suddenly Odd reached up with his mouth, biting Yumi in the cheek. Yumi yelled in surprise and pulled back her fist, ready to plaster his brains all over the pavement. I watched in horror, a sudden jolt of reality electrocuting me, but before I could stop them, someone else did.

A large hand nabbed my shoulder and pulled me back, making my butt slam into a table across the aisle, moving it back a few centimeters. The space between the tables was suddenly dominated by a fat, red sweatshirt, and a loud familiar voice boomed over everything, rendering the cafeteria silent once more.

"Ishiyama, Della Robia! Stop this racket this instant!" Yumi was jerked by her collar all the way back so she was able to sit on top of our table. The spirit of the fight was still in her eyes as she glared at Odd, who was also pulled out from under the table, saliva dribbling out of his mouth. Jim, who held them back from each other by their collars, furiously began to deliver to them something similar to the Miranda Rights.

"A swift trip to the principal's for you two! I'm surprised at you! Out of everyone at Kadic I would never suspect you guys getting into a huge bruising fight together! What's the matter with you?"

Odd gave a sharp tug against Jim, edging to get at Yumi. Yumi gritted her teeth in reply, never taking her eyes off of him. Giving a sharp pull that resulted in their shirts cutting against their neck, Jim turned his head around back at me.

"You, you look like a strong kid. Come over here and give me a hand and take one of these to the office with me!"

My mouth moved as if to say something in protest, but eventually all I gave was a nod laden with strong shock. Jim sniffed and backed out into the aisle, shoving Yumi at me. Almost immediately Yumi beat at my chest and stomped on my feet then tried to make a break for it at Odd, who was slowly coming to realization what he had just done. I fumbled for a bit, trying to grasp my cool, and snatched her by the arms, digging my feet down so I was a simple unmoving deadweight to her. She twisted and turned, trying to break my hold, all the while shooting me hateful glares. I gave out a silent groan. It was hard enough just to _keep_ her there, much less take her to the principal's office!

Yumi spat out a curse or two at me and Jim in Japanese, and once again stomped on my feet, trying to get away. She doubled her efforts when she realized that my grip was weakening, flexibly twisting her body in seemingly awkward ways. She was about two seconds from breaking away when Aelita leaped forward, covering Yumi's mouth tightly with her hand.

"Yumi, get a hold of yourself! Think of what you're doing!" She hissed desperately to her. As if by magic, Yumi stopped. She met Aelita's gaze momentarily, tensions thick between them. I sucked in a breath, waiting to see what would happen.

In the grasp of my hands, I felt Yumi begin to tremble uncontrollably. Her breaths became rather choppy and high, and when Aelita released her hand Yumi choked out a cough of realization, and slumped down.

Not expecting Yumi to suddenly become totally dependant on me to keep her up, I went half-way down with her. I gave out a grunt of surprise and awkwardly rearranged my legs so that they were in a stronger position to lift her up. As I did, I found it terribly embarrassing to do so.

Lifting someone up who's imitating a limp, sleeping form sometimes calls for changes in the ways you hold them multiple times. Unfortunately, when you're trying to do it quickly and with a dazed mind you may find yourself grazing places you wish you hadn't. For example, as I was trying to adjust my arms to get a better hold to pull Yumi up, they ended up right underneath her breasts—specifically, touching them. A serious blush followed suit, and I almost dropped her right there. Very quickly I transferred my hands to her armpits, lifting her up that way instead. Thankfully, she didn't seem to notice, or care.

A moment or two more of struggling led to us finally embarking to go to the principal's office. Yumi gathered enough sense to stand on her own, so I just walked beside her just in case she broke a fuse again. (Or maybe it was because Jim told me to anyways…)

Jim stopped us at the secretary's office, telling us that he wouldn't be too long in explaining what happened to Mr. Delmas. Odd and Yumi glumly took seats, leaving an empty chair between them. I was going to sit too, but Ms. Weber, the secretary, called upon me.

"Oh…Reese, was it? I was actually just going to call for you. There are a few things we need to discuss,"

Blankly I walked up to her desk as she began to explain Kadic's grading procedure. A few words actually made it into my head, because I was distracted by the conversation that suddenly sparked between Yumi and Odd.

"O…Odd…I'm…sorry, I…," Yumi began softly. Odd sniffed before he responded.

"Eh, just don't. I was the one who really started it anyways…,"

Yumi shifted in her seat, uncomfortable, "No…I…I was too insensitive about…about…,"

Both Odd and Yumi choked something painful down, each clearly uncomfortable about what Yumi was going to say next. Ms. Weber asked me who the report card should be sent to which jerked me out of my concentration on what was going on between them. Ms. Weber asked me the question again, to which I softly said.

"Er, I can handle that. My address is…complicated," I lied. Ms. Weber gave me another look, then was about to argue against me when without warning, Yumi broke.

Tears began to cascade down her cheeks, accompanied by high-pitched, shaky breaths. Odd was surprised and uneasy at first, but he cleared that away, scooting over the empty seat next to Yumi and putting a scrawny arm of comfort about her shoulders. In a short while Yumi's head rested on his bony shoulder, one of her hands clutching and twisting his shirt into knots. It wasn't long before Odd's shoulder was damp with bitter saltwater tears.

Both Ms. Weber and I had paid attention to this from the sudden interruption. Ms. Weber's face looked a little confused and disgusted, while mine was as emotionless as a statue. I was getting pretty good at covering up my feelings completely.

"Dear God," Ms. Weber began, "What kind of two-faced friends brawl against each other then cry on one another's shoulder?"

I blinked, then turned to her, standing straight like a soldier and replied in a low, stone-based voice meant to batter the listener, "Leave them be, they've lost a good friend."

Ms. Weber stared at me in surprise at my defiant response to authority, and looked like she was about to give me a demerit or two because of it, but found nothing to say. Unblinking, I stated that for now the matter of my report card was closed, and turned around to leave the secretary office. As I did, I saw Odd out of the corner of my eye.

He was staring at me in some sort of gratitude, his own welled tears glistening over his violet eyes. By the time I reached the door, he too had them rolling down his cheeks, a side of his face resting in Yumi's hair.

Whatever the punishment Mr. Delmas was going to give them, I hoped that it wasn't going to be harsh.

SWEETNESS: Like a candy sugarplum, it always helps in the gloomy hours.

Sugarplum pink hair.

Fire was in front of me, to my left and my right. Hot ash seared my vision, though despite that I kept my eyes open. My breathing was ragged and hard as I stepped back, desperate to get away from the fire. I backed into a black stone wall, freezing cold to the touch. My breath rose in panic as the dangerous fire crept closer and closer. I blinked my eyes as they played tricks on me, for I was seeing cackling faces within the licks of flames. I pressed myself against the wall, squirming away from the fire that began to burn me. Crying out for help was the only thing I could do now, but even before I was able to do that, hands that came from within the black wall clamped over my mouth and dug into my stomach. My scream was muffled, a face emerging beside me to mock my effort. Before I could recognize the face, it pulled me back straight through the black wall, and into cold darkness.

Now, instead of blistering heat, I was confronted by biting dark cold. I was floating in some sort of space-like dimension, with no gravity. Though it was pitch black, I could see details of color as clear as day when I looked down at my ash-laden clothes. As I floated around I noticed this was a confined area, surrounded by sharp, ebony crystals that did not reflect any sort of light whatsoever. They were frost-biting cold to the touch, and they pulsed with a sort of eagerness that I can only describe as blood thirst.

Confusion made me wonder why I was here, and how I got here. Before I could explore this place anymore, a figure melted out of the floor, smirking evilly at me. My breath was lost when my brain told me who it was.

It was me.

"Wh-What?" I whispered. His smirk widened, stretching to the X on his cheek. I twisted my body, bringing an arm in front of me, when I noticed one very important thing.

My arm was clean of any scars whatsoever. Confused, I began to feel all over for the familiar sensation of indentations in my skin. I touched my cheek to where the X usually was, and found it gone. All the while, the scarred me stood there, hands behind his back, grinning as I wound about myself in confusion.

"What is this?" I finally asked, "Who are you?"

"I'm…you…," he said maliciously, as if he was having fun toying with me, "Or, to be more specific, I'm the present you. I'm…Reese."

"But, no, Reese is just my alias!" I choked, panting and diverting my eyes everywhere like some sort of madman.

"_Just_ your alias?!" he said, throwing his head back and laughing at my foolishness, "You really don't get it, do you? You're dead, Ulrich. Dead as a doornail!"

"I'm_not_ dead!" I protested, watching as he 'walked' nearer to me, ever wearing that haunting smirk, "My father just forged it, I'm not dead!" My voice crackled painfully, and I held my throat.

"Your father? Whoever said _anything_about your father and the newscast?" He said, eyes gleaming playfully and grin stretching wider.

_No…_the thought ran through my head. I tried to protest, but my throat screeched and groaned, preventing anything but a rasped sound to escape past my lips. I couldn't speak, and the more time my throat had to malfunction, the worse my breathing got. _No…!_

Reese laughed again as he began to sing maniacally. "You're dead, Ulrich! Dead, dead, dead! Reese is the one in charge now, don't worry; he'll take care of you! Dead, dead, dead! Dead as a doornail, dead, dead, dead!"

The volume of his voice rose higher and higher as my breathing decreased, causing me to collapse in zero gravity. My eyesight wavered, washed over with sleep. _NO!!_ My head screamed to no avail. _I can't die! I can't die!!_

"Dead, dead, dead!!"

My hand fell from my throat as it completely closed, leaving me with no oxygen to feed my life. I could feel my brain shut down as every sense left me, my hearing the last thing to go.

"DEAD, DEAD, DEAD!!!"

I woke up with a cry of protest, jolting straight up so that I was sitting in bed. Kiwi, who had fallen asleep between my calves, yawned at me and gave me a look that clearly said, "What's your problem?"

I glanced over to Odd's empty bed, noting that he must be in the library still, organizing the books with Yumi. I had gone to sleep early, around seven-thirty, strangely exhausted and hungry for some rest. It was about quarter after nine now, the room dark and cool from the unforgiving gusts of late autumn wind outside the window.

I swept my hair back with a clammy hand, trying to calm myself down. Kiwi 'ruffed' at me and stood up, looking at me expectantly. I stared at him blankly for a while, then gave in and scratched his ears. He rolled over to expose his belly, asking for more. Absent-mindedly, I began to rub his stomach.

Aside from Aelita, Kiwi was the only one who recognized who I was. It made sense to me; after all, he was a dog. From the moment that we had enough time together, Kiwi was rubbing and licking me all over, as if to say "I missed you!" I think the only reason why he did was because I gave him the best belly rubs all around, but hey, what do I know? I don't speak dog. For all I know, he just really missed me.

A half-moon's light partially illuminated the room with weak beams. As I gazed out the window, I stopped giving Kiwi his belly-rub. He was disappointed in me for this, and 'ruffed' at me again. I looked down at him a little apologetically, and got out of bed. Kiwi watched me intently as I dressed, seeming to question what I was doing. While I put on my cloth D-ring belt, the last article I needed, I gave him a swift pet on the head and whispered.

"Don't worry, Kiwi, I'll be back by morning…,"

Kiwi licked my hand and watched me go into the hallway quietly. Keeping an eye out for monitors or other students, I crept down the hall and made my way to the staircase.

As soon as I closed the door behind me I heard voices coming up from below. I ducked behind a corner, hoping that they wouldn't see me.

"Jeez, I can't believe it took us three hours to organize the book shelves…," Odd complained as he and Yumi climbed the stairs, "Ms. Weber must've put extra books out on purpose; man, I'm pooped!"

Yumi gave a small giggle in response, "Pooped? Sorry Odd, but that's just something strange to say nowadays,"

"Unless I wanna be strange!" Odd protested, their steps getting closer.

"Say, Reese is your roommate, right?" Yumi asked. I gulped.

"Yeah, why?" Odd responded, "He's really quiet, and sometimes during the night he goes out, or just doesn't come to bed. It's like he can't sleep or something. But oh, he's an artist too. He could use a little work on some stuff, but he mostly draws in a realistic style. I think he draws people he sees on the street or something. By the way, that kid studies and keeps his grades up non-stop. It's actually kind of surprising, because he sure doesn't look like the straight-A kind. Kiwi loves him, too,"

I had to clamp a hand about my mouth to keep my feelings about his summary of me inside. Yumi responded kind of distantly, but still in a cheerful way. I could tell they were at the top of the stairs.

"I was just wondering…I mean, you heard him in the secretary's office, didn't you?" she asked, and I imagined her fiddling with a red lock of dyed hair.

"Yeah. Holy man, I didn't know Reese was like that. I saw the look on Ms. Weber's face; she was totally shunned that he said that! He's got some rare piece of nobility stuck behind that mouth of his—it's too bad he hides it all the time,"

"Mmm…," Yumi said, clearly past being here at the moment. Odd's voice softened a bit as he asked a sensitive question.

"Hey, you're gonna be okay, right?" He said, just outside the boy's dormitory door. I could see him clearly, and a little bit of Yumi as well. I pressed myself against the shadowed wall, trying to make myself less noticeable. There was a short lapse of silence when Yumi took in a deep breath before she answered him.

"Yeah…at least, for now…," A flash of skeptic feeling crossed Odd's face for a short bit, but he took her answer anyways, and bade her goodnight. Yumi did the same, but didn't move.

_Oh great…_the thought crossed my mind, and if I would've allowed myself to move, I'd do a real dramatic eye roll. I couldn't exactly slip out now with Yumi there. First off, she'd question me to what I was doing, and second off she'd probably get angry at me for eavesdropping on their conversation. My gaze dropped to my feet as I impatiently anticipated her leave.

She did eventually leave, but not in the way I kind of wanted her to. She softly murmured a few sentences to herself in Japanese, then turned around and ran down the stairs and out the door into Kadic's courtyard, just south of the cafeteria.

I'm not fluent in Japanese—hell, I'd probably die halfway through a conversation about the weather. But that's talking about speaking in native speed, I guess. At the public school there was an opportunity to take a short Japanese class worth a high-school credit. More interested in the language than the credit, I took the class, unable to push Yumi from my mind when I was learning it. I got pretty far in terms of vocabulary and pronunciation, but holding up a conversation was hard for me. Either way, I could at least translate what she said under her breath, even though I could roughly hear her.

There was a foreign word stuck in there that was translated from a different language to Japanese, but it didn't take a brain to figure out what "Urikku" meant...

_I miss you…Ulrich…I can't fake this…anymore…_

After translating that, my heart literally skipped more than a few beats. I suddenly contemplated if I should go out into the park like I was planning. It took a few more minutes before my heart told me to go—not because of Yumi, but because it was my only escape. I sighed, then turned and followed out the door, making my way to the park entrance without hurry.

I never realized how much I missed being alone in the park until I came back here two weeks ago.

FERVENCE: It's the only thing that can help you hacking codes against evil A.I.s

Jeremy could help with that too.

I was about mid-way deep in the park when I heard a soft, mournful sound. It didn't take a handful of my brain cells to decipher who it was—but still, curiosity edged me on to glance to see who it was.

She was sitting up against a tree in front of me, her knees brought up to her chest, her feet following the downward slope to a narrow pathway. Her arms were folded on top of her knees, cradling her head as she quietly wept into them.

Speaking of cradling, that's exactly what I wanted to do to her. In fact, I was really close to crouching down and doing that to…if it hadn't have been for my conscience.

_Don't…you…dare…You've already gone too far with this. You need to pull out! Love is a luxury you can't afford…_

Ulrich protested against this, but unfortunately, he was much too weak…compared to Reese.

"You shouldn't be crying," I said emotionlessly. Yumi jerked forward and onto the narrow pathway, stumbling down the slope and crashing. She righted herself so she was sitting up to face me, using her arms to support her. Stray locks of her hair tumbled in front of her face and eyes as she looked up at me, scared at first. Once she realized who I was though, she dropped her gaze downward and brushed the locks away from her face.

I stood directly beside the tree she was sitting against, a little foreboding and dark. At least, on the outside.

"Why should I listen to you?" Yumi said, softly but defiantly. I picked my way down the slope so I could tower directly over her. I didn't offer a hand of help, nor did I answer her question.

She stood up, brushing the dust off of her. She was a bit reluctant at first, but she did wipe away the dirt on her…_ahem_…rear end. After she was done she looked up at me again, the top of her head barely reaching my chin. Her dark chocolate eyes looked black in the night, but a shine from the stars gave them life—as well as her uncertain emotions. It was clear that she didn't know how to respond to me, or how to act around me. In the end, this made her frightened and angry.

Perfect for me.

"Do you always have to be there when I don't want you to?" She challenged. I retorted in the same stone-faced tone I had had since I got here.

"I look at it as you being there when I don't want you to," This sort of a response earned me a full-scale Yumi style glare. I felt a smirk tug at the edge of my lips—the same smirk that Reese sported in my nightmare. Reality struck hard.

_What the hell am I doing?_

A rustle in the bushes to my right caused Yumi to jerk her head over to see if she could find a reason for the noise.

"Dear God is the whole of Kadic out here too…?" she whispered unhappily. I looked over too for about a second, but the exposure of her smooth neck diverted my gaze. My hands suddenly became itchy.

"Is the whole of Kadic interested in watching you cry?" I asked smugly. Yumi shot her eyes back to me, once again giving me a glare.

"Oh, they would be, and I swear if I hear a word about it getting out to anyone, I will kick your butt so hard until you wouldn't be able to sit down for a month. Why are you out here anyways? Excuse me, but you don't seem to have a reason to be here!"

Thanks for flaring my anger, Yumi. This isn't going to be pretty.

"Neither do you," I said, a hint of anger in my voice, "It seems like he was nothing but a mere friend, and you liked him. Am I wrong?"

Yumi flinched. My heart skipped. She didn't really…?

"Why are you crying over him if you don't even know if he likes you back? How do you even know if he remembered you at all? There's no reason for you to be drying your eyes out over this…_boy!_"

Yumi tried to be angry by this point. She really did. But with as long as I'd known her, I knew that it was pure act. She couldn't put a mask on now because she was so exhausted by doing it practically all day.

"Besides," I added, "he's dead. Dead as a doornail. Dead, dead, dead."

Painful tears rimmed Yumi's eyes. The annoying tune that Reese sang to me in my nightmare suddenly got ensnared in my mind, and it was impossible for me to get it out. It danced right along with every word that came out of my mouth.

"Why should I listen to you…," Yumi said again, weakly, "You don't even know him…,"

"Why should he be any different than any other boy you meet?" I snapped, "Because he was…_special?_"

"No, he was more than that…," Yumi said quietly, sniffling, "Ulrich Stern wasn't just special to me! He was the only person I ever really trusted completely without cause outside of my family!" her voice raised as she defiantly stuck her face closer to mine. Her breath smelled of sweet lilacs, refreshing to the tongue. I scowled as she finished.

"I don't care what you say, Ulrich was part of my world, and nothing will ever change that!"

"Except for the fact that you used 'was.'" I pointed out. Yumi stared at me, stunned. Her lips trembled in angered, sad shock as more tears trickled over her face. Like the obedient statue that I was, I remained a rock. An emotionless…rock. She murmured something unkind to me in Japanese, and then fled. I stared after her for a few more moments as Reese, before Ulrich finally resurfaced.

I stumbled back, finding support against a tree. I clutched my head in pain, digging my fingers into my skin. The annoying tune kept playing in my mind, with a new phrase added to prove it's point once again.

_I thought I told you, fool! Reese is to keep the cool, 'cause you're dead, dead, dead!_

"Shut up…," I murmured, "Get out of my head, you impostor!"

_You're the impostor, not I, because I am now your head, why?_

'_Cause you're dead, dead, dead!_

"Dead, dead, dead…!" I whispered in horror.

The newscast was right. Ulrich Stern really is as dead as a doornail.

* * *

Dammit. I wasn't supposed to bash you with my emoing! Ok, you know what? Don't comment on the author comments. Comment on the story.

Just...let me be.


	8. Seeing Red

typed this all day, switching off between this, Phoenix Wright, and my all-important...um...nature-calling.

If anyone is wondering, yes I am still emoing. I WAS CLOSE TO STOPPING, mind you. Skit Troupe rocked my socks off, but uh...when I...um, got home...yeah. Nevermind.

* * *

Chapter Eight: Seeing Red 

_Though this be Madness…there be Method in it_

Aelita was looking for me the next morning after breakfast. I was looking for Aelita even _before_ breakfast. It didn't take us long to confront each other, which we did in the courtyard, stomp right up until we were half a meter away from each other, and simultaneously say—

"Free time at the park, underneath the aspen."

As far as that, our problem was solved. A counseling appointment with Aelita was sure to calm me down somewhat. She could help bring to light about what I did to Yumi last night. I shocked myself, and I shocked Yumi, but after hours of thinking last night, the conclusion I came down to was simply this:

Even though I hated to do it, it was indeed for her own good. This way she would shun me and hate me, never speak to me again and do all she could to avoid me. As long as the threat of my father was still out there, this was for the best. And, to add to that, as long as I was losing my mind and becoming a threat myself, this was also for the best. When I said good-bye…I really meant it.

We arrived at the aspen at about the same time, so we wasted no more by immediately plopping ourselves down, burning to start. I let Aelita go first.

"Yumi's hurt, Reese. What the heck happened last night?"

"I…," I began, but soon found my voice caught in my throat by the invisible net that signified that I was on the verge of crying. Leaning forward a bit, I failed to keep my voice from wavering as I shakily continued, "It's…I made a mistake. It might've been the right thing to do, and it felt like a shit-load of holy goodness shining on me when I did it—but when I told off Ms. Weber, I made a mistake…

"I don't know, maybe I was paranoid—hell, I _am_ paranoid, but for some crazed reason I suspected of Yumi beginning to find interest in me…and I…I can't just allow that. My father—he hates any Oriental of any kind, and if he ever found out about her…he'd—I, I would never forgive myself…,"

"So in turn, you totally shunned her away…," Aelita finished, drifting off and trying to make sense of my bizarre reasoning. I shook my head, crouched over my knees.

"I can't take any chances…," I whispered, "I'm even hesitant to talk to you. I mean…I can do it, but in the back of my mind there's always that 'what if' question, the paranoia never leaves! Everything I say and do somehow could connect to my father finding me, of someone else realizing who I am, of…of life just falling apart!"

Aelita let out a whoosh of air, "If you're bothered that much, you could leave you know…so you wouldn't have to worry. You could go to some sort of monastery—,"

"Monastery?!" I objected in confusion. Aelita glanced at me.

"You could continue school there, and you could live there when there isn't school. Sure, it may seem silly right now, but you could really do it—,"

"I_can't_! Regardless of hassle or not—my dad knows how to hurt me. He wouldn't attack me physically, no. No, Aelita. If he ever found me, his target would be _you_, and everyone I know and care about." Something was wrong, I could feel it. Aelita was…blocking me somehow. Something about me was bothering her, and it made her feel obliged to shirk me because of it.

"Hmmph," Aelita said under her breath, confirming my suspicions, "What about your mother? It's all over that your father's fresh DNA wasn't on the scene at all. He was on a business trip. The only DNA found was yours, and hers,"

Anger, sadness, and pain rose in my chest. She didn't really believe that crap, did she? The more she said, the harder it was to remain calm.

"The prime suspect of the case is you, Reese, Ulrich, whatever. How am I supposed to know that what you were telling me the last time wasn't a lie?"

Don't do this to me, Aelita!

"In fact…how do I know that you're not here to hurt us and tell everyone else about Lyo—,"

Finally, I burst. Hot tears rolled painfully down my cheeks as I screamed in frustrated desperation.

"I_didn't kill her!_ I didn't! I had nothing to do with it! What kind of bastard could_ever_ do that?! Shut up, Aelita! Just shut up!! Okay, you want the truth?_Fine_. The night before you told me you knew who I was, _I found her_. That's fucking right, princess! _I found her before anybody else did._ God, her body was probably still warm!"

Like a crazed madman, I grasped Aelita by the arms _very_ firmly, making sure we had complete eye contact. Aelita gave quite a few gasps and cries of shock and pain as I held her tighter and tighter and tighter, my voice, my anger, my sadness, and my desperation rising by the second. Tears clogged up the scar on my face, overflowing and following down my chin, dropping into Aelita's lap. My eyesight was blurry and unfocused, my thoughts disconnected from my mouth as my raving words flew out without any consent whatsoever.

"I just went home to check up on her! I just wanted to see that she was okay! The _worst_ crime I ever did that night! I wanted to see my mother to make sure she was fine after sending me away! All I find is a shattered interior and blood on the screen door! _Blood,_ Goddamnit! Blood that trailed from my house, to an alley, to…to…,"

I shivered as I continued, "My mother's shredded, fucked-up corpse that was half-eaten by hellhounds! But it's not like _you_would understand anyways—you barely remember your parents—much less your fucking mother!! You can't—I can't…I couldn't…save…My…My…," I looked down for a moment, focusing my eyes on the wet spot on Aelita's legs, where all of my tears had fallen and soaked her. "Grrraaaaagh!!!" I yelled, clamping a rigid hand over my face and digging into my skin. My other hand still held firm to one of Aelita's arms, though the grip was gradually weakening as I sobbed into my hand, my back jerking with each muffled cry I let out.

The raging fire that had suddenly burst out was finally simmering down to a level where the woods seemed eerily quiet—after all, no creature dared to make a sound after what just happened. Aelita forcibly tried to calm herself down, even though I felt her edginess to get away in her aura. Afraid of me—just like everyone else in the world. But then, who wouldn't be afraid of a teenage murderer?

White-hot flashes burned in my head—in between the white were short visions of my mother suffering in some sort of way; such as screaming, weeping, or pure silent stares of longing. Unpleasant sounds played in the background as each scene flew by, building up until a shrill sound of pain screeched through, etching into my mind and making me flinch every fifteen seconds or so. I scrunched my eyes shut, shivering and letting my hand slip down from Aelita's arm, digging my fingers into my face even further. Thankfully, it eventually stopped when reality snapped back to me when Aelita shifted position.

I opened my mouth to speak, trying to find the right word to begin, "I…I'm going insane, Aelita…," I confessed softly. Aelita sucked in a breath, waiting for another storm to break. I heaved in a sigh, holding it for as long as I could before letting it out.

"Every night when I do sleep…God, the nightmares I have…Before I found her there, they were kind of tolerable, but the night when I did and after…they've changed for the worse. Each new one pushes me farther to the edge of the cliff—but, shit; I'm probably already falling off of it without knowing it. Dual personalities play in my head when I'm not focused on anything. Reese—the "present" Ulrich—torments the "past" Ulrich daily, singing songs and laughing whenever Ulrich tries to break through. I…I'm usually Ulrich, but then again, where did Reese come from? I'm both, right? And yet…how can I hate one so much and pity the other half of me whenever I can…?

"When I see Yumi I tell myself every time, both as Reese and Ulrich, that love is a luxury I can't afford…,

"But then…isn't love the reason why I'm doing this? I'm trying to protect you all…I'm trying to make sure you won't get hurt because of me…isn't that the exact definition of the 'luxury I cannot afford?' Aelita…," I whispered, my cascade of tears finally trickling down so they rhythmically flowed down in slow casual movements. For the first time this autumn, I truly felt cold.

"I can't do this…I'm nearly fifteen…I'm just a…a boy…," I muttered, shakily breathing. A strange silence greeted my confession, broken only by my heavy breathing and the occasional leaf blowing down from the aspen. Seconds passed, set into stone as I finally retreated back from Aelita completely, though I was still seated in front of her. Both my hands were in my lap, trembling as the delusion of red swathed over them sickeningly. I blinked multiple times to bite back stinging tears that were threatening to show once again. Aelita didn't move for the longest time.

"Reese…," she said. I didn't respond.

"Reese…," Aelita tried again, a little louder. I still didn't respond.

"Ulrich!" She cried. I slowly looked up, only to be slapped in the cheek with the scar. My head was thrown back unexpectedly, then grabbed and jolted so I looked Aelita straight in the eye.

"Apologize, forgive, forget. I'm sorry, things have just been…stressful. Xana's been cooking up something big for the past few days, news casts have been blaming you, and all of the sudden, you're _dead_. You're response to me to all of this is you're going out of your mind, and you look like you're about to give up—,"

"And this bothers you why?" I retorted. Aelita puffed out her cheeks, and looked like she was about to slap me again. Honestly, I couldn't help but flinching. Her slaps _hurt_.

"You_really_ haven't changed whatsoever. You're still the same solitary silent_idiot_ you were two years ago. I'm worried about you because of the last thing I said!" she shouted. My eyes were, I admit, wide with surprise and a touch of fear.

"Giving…up?" I guessed feebly. I flinched immediately, expecting another slap. Thankfully, it didn't come, but Aelita's face lit up with affirmation and…anger?

"Yes,_exactly_!" she yelled. I flinched again. God, Aelita was _scary_ when she was angry! I felt like I should curl up at her feet and tremble at her authority! Jeez! Had anyone else witnessed this before? This was…this was as scary as Michael Jackson's dog that he took to a Nicaraguan plastic surgeon last Thursday! Holy _God!_

"At this point in time, giving up is the _last_ thing you should even _think_ about doing, Mister! You said so yourself two seconds ago: "But isn't love the reason why I'm doing this?" Well, if it is—_which it IS_—then_stop_ moping and _stop_acting like it's the last day on all earth and you just want to go end it all. If you're here so you can protect us from your father, then_stay_here. We know _squat_ about him, and you know lots. So, do whatever you need to so you can keep your identity, and I'll keep Yumi from blowing off the edge with you. Do we have a deal?!"

"Y-Yes ma'am…," I muttered softly. Aelita's cheeks puffed out again as she repeated her question louder. You know, she may scare me when she's angry, but puffing her cheeks out like that? That's actually kind of cute.

"Y-Yes Ma'am!!" I replied loud and clear, like she was a military general. Aelita settled back down a bit, though she still looked a little aggravated, and said, "Good,"

There were a few more moments of silence between us as the heat of the situation simmered down to a normal level. I was about to strike up a more normal conversation, when something not-so-far-off rustled in the woods. Aelita leaped and caught my mouth, whispering fiercely.

"Oh no, dear God! Quick, we need a good excuse to explain us being here, because there really isn't any way we could be study partners—we have no materials!"

"Uh—," I began, but was immediately cut off.

"Ohhh! They're coming closer—shoot! I guess I'll have to use that…,"

"Use wha—,"

I found out before she told me.

So basically, let me set the scene again for you.

Jeremy Belpois, who was looking for Aelita since her cell phone wasn't on her, was wandering in the woods hoping to find her. As he wandered nearer to a small clearing with an aspen, he unpredictably walked straight into a very embarrassing, _very_ unexpected scene, in which Aelita had grabbed me, pulled me close, and cemented our lips together.

_Whoaaahohhhh,_ thar, pretty face! I like you, and I've had more than one hormone rushes at you, but kissing me in an—_ahurr hurr_—open-mouthed beginning of a make-out way totally out of the blue sky yonder—and especially when your crush walks in on us? That's just…_awwwwwkward!_

Yes, she kissed me, but NO I did NOT kiss her back! My crush is sealed, pal! I like Yumi, hands down fair and square! There's no way I would kiss Aelita back! My lips stayed sealed shut during the entire…

Aw, who am I kidding? It was my first kiss. I admit I did sort of kiss her back, but I didn't get carried away. I mean, my hands were busy supporting me (she, uh, kinda launched herself onto me, you, uh, see…in her hurry to create an alibi within a split second…) and my eyes were wide with complete and cow utter _shock_. Okay, I confess my lips twitched a little bit, but believe me, they didn't open! Not one bit!

Come on, you believe me, don't you?!! Huh?!!

_Ahem_…Anyway, um, Jeremy was kind of…um…quietly pissed? Erm, yeah. That's a…less detailed way to explain it. I mean, if you see your crush kissing someone else randomly—and not just a peck on the lips,_nooo_! This is full-out kissing—and you really, really like them and you're almost 100 sure they like you back, wouldn't you be just a little…ticked?

Oh, and he had his glasses on too.

"Er_hem_!!" he coughed loudly. Aelita pulled away, although, not too quickly, and looked up at him, hands folded over the wet spot on her thighs that I had cried on. She tried to look innocent enough as Jeremy stood just a few paces away, but there was just something about the situation that kind of boiled her innocence down to negative forty. Maybe it was the fact that I was still messily sprawled over the tree's roots, trying to find some supportive hold on something besides the craggy aspen bark before I fell all the way back. Hmm, no, maybe it was something else. I don't know.

I had the sudden urge to right myself, but yet I didn't feel like I was allowed to do that. So, there I stayed, splayed out underneath the ancient tree, just waiting for Jeremy to break the ice.

"…We found out some things about…Mr. Hopper," Jeremy said stonily, "The others are waiting near the cafeteria…when you're ready." At the last sentence, Jeremy gave me a cold glare, and then tromped off back to Kadic. Aelita immediately put a hand to her chest, breathing a little harder than usual. I finally righted myself so I was sitting regularly.

"…What was that?" I asked her. Aelita didn't look at me, just closed her eyes as she gathered some thoughts while she answered.

"I'm sorry for using you like that—I had to act quickly. Why? Did it bother…," In mid-sentence she looked over, then swiftly dropped the question, putting a few fingers to her lips to stifle laughter. My face was redder than a poinsettia flower from what she had done—and, apparently, it looked hilarious.

"Th-This isn't funny!" I stuttered, "You could've _told_ me what you were going to do, couldn't you?!"

Aelita couldn't help herself. She started to giggle, which escalated into laughter as I kept talking.

"Wh-What if that was Mr. Delmas—or, or _Jim?!_ Dear God, what if it was Jim?! Could you just imagine—Or, holy crap! If it were Milly or Tamiya, we'd be in huge trouble! Hey! Stop laughing! Stooop! Th-This is important! Don't _do_ that again!" I protested, stumbling over my words. By this time, Aelita could've well been rolling around the ground she was laughing so hard.

"Oh man, I never realized you were so _cute_ when you were embarrassed! Is this why Yumi always giggled about you two years ago? Wow, no one can pull a face like that the way you can!" she exclaimed, trying to clamp her hand over her mouth.

I jerked back, raising a hand in defense. I was about to start rambling again, but the aspen stopped me by merely being in the wrong place. When I jerked back I hit my head squarely into the bark, making me cry in surprise and being drowned in saffron late autumn leaves. Aelita laughed harder. I gulped as I brushed all the leaves off of me, mumbling rather loudly how embarrassing it was to be kissed by her.

"Oh, Ulrich, stop! It was so adorable! Besides, with as much stuff going on in your life you need a little fun to lighten it up!" Aelita said, wiping a few tears from her eyes as she finally started to calm down. We both stood up, and I glowered at her.

"Fun, yeah fun. Just not _that_ kind of fun, God forbid!! Yeeeeuck! Could we, um, _not_count that as a 'first kiss'? I would have never have expected—,"

Aelita burst in my face, laughing again.

"Sorry, once again, but really it was the only way we could've made it believable. Alright, I guess it doesn't _have_ to be a real first kiss. Either way, I better meet up with the group now. Oh, and Reese…," she added at the end. I looked at her, expecting a serious, uplifting comment to send me on my way.

Well…I got this instead.

"You've got a leaf in your hair—right in front, right there!"

She gave a bubbly smile, then practically pranced off to Kadic. I wasn't paying that much attention, as I was wrestling with the leaf that was stuck in front of my face. Sometimes, no matter how pretty they are, those little buggers just _don't_ want to come out!

CHIVALRY: Something missing these days—mostly needed to help the elders.

Something taught vigorously in a traditional Japanese family.

It's night again.

Even though I really hated it at first, I was actually thankful of the 'kissing episode' earlier today. When I reflected back on it, it was actually a really funny memory, especially when Jeremy walked in. And the mock fight afterwards where I was humiliated so much I was struggling with my words…well, that was just classic.

I'm glad I have that memory tucked away someplace safe, because I'm back to being the way I was before. "Whiney, whiney emo!" as I heard Odd put it under his breath when I was leaving the room to come into the park for most of the night. Believe it or not, that actually made me smirk.

The night was cloudless, and the stars defied the light pollution like never before, shining their full might. Countless thousands of them, all up there, watching everyone on earth; which made me think of something as I stared up at them from in between the branches of the trees, the stray leaf clinging for dear life as the occasional wind bit down on them.

Was my mother a star up there? Was she watching over me from up there, disguised in the dark navy blanket of the sky? Well, if she was up there, could she at least give me something…? Some sort of sign…?

I sighed, blowing out white breaths of warm air as I focused on as many stars as I could at one time. My mind wandered on this subject for a bit before it ventured off to some other deep thought of mine. I wasn't doing anything much different, just gazing up at the stars still and ruining my neck.

"Oh…," A small voice said behind me. I blinked, and lowered my head, but didn't turn around.

"You…," they said, contempt present in their voice. I let out a whoosh of air, watching as it turned into mist and floated up and away. Oh, I knew this person, and I knew them a little too well. I understood why she was here, but still…it seems as though irony loves for us to 'accidentally' find each other during the night.

"The one Aelita…," she stopped, seeming to choke back some unknown emotion. I shook my head.

"Now_that_ wasn't my fault. Sudden impulsive panic on the girl's part. What was her name again…?" I asked, "Ileeva?"

An exasperated and annoyed sigh came from behind me as she directly corrected me.

"It's_Eye-Lee-Tuh_. Aelita. And are you positive it was her fault?"

"Um,_yeah_. I'm sure. I was underneath—Urk!" My stomach gave me a tiny shove. Talk first—think later. No wonder I'm a teenager.

"_What_?!" She said disbelievingly. "Do you mea—,"

"Gaaah! No no no!" I protested, swiveling around on my feet. Yumi was standing three meters away, a strange expression on her face. "I didn't mean, not like, nooo! Ah, _chikusho_…," I murmured, letting my voice drift off.

"Did you just…say 'damn' in Japanese…?" Yumi asked, putting one foot forward as if to hear me better.

"Uh…," was my all intelligent answer. In other words, I just said 'yes.'

"Then…you_understood_ what I said to you…last night?"

"Um…a little…," I said. Yumi gave me a look.

"Maybe…,"

She gave me another look.

"…Yeah…,"

Yumi's face twisted into an "oh crap" look, and she looked away. After all, what she said was probably one of the most disrespectful things a Japanese girl could've said to anybody. Fortunately, I didn't really take it to heart. I mean, I was being an ass. I deserved to be called what she called me.

"It…wasn't like that," I said finally, "I…actually don't know what happened then, but it just did. End…of…story,"

Yumi shook her head, "I don't get you," she said. "Just exactly…who are you?"

"A German-Irish boy…one could say…," I muttered, feeling…different somehow. Yumi blinked and stared at me, not sure what to make out of that. I mirrored one of Yumi's previous moves by shaking my head, but also turning around and gazing back up at the stars. I could hear Yumi's footsteps draw nearer in curiosity. I counted them, keeping my soft feelings at bay. Now wasn't the time to get mushy; especially after what happened during free time between me and Aelita.

"What are you trying to do here…?" Yumi asked. Responding with cold silence, I said nothing. Yumi's voice sounded a little scared as she softly whispered her next question, "You aren't…Xana…are you?"

"What?" I asked, sounding thoroughly confused. Yumi let a quick breath of relief loose, relaxing herself. For a short moment, I thought that nothing bad was going to happen tonight, but that's when Yumi pull her full weight on treacherously thin ice.

"So…what do you think of the stars?" She asked, stepping up so she was nearly beside me. I hummed shortly to signify I didn't know what she meant, so she elaborated.

"Say, just forget that they're actually scientific balls of nuclear destruction…what do you think of them…spiritually?"

I flinched, and looked down and away, not willing to answer. Yumi gave me a glance, and plainly said,

"I won't say it's stupid—,"

"It's not that." I interrupted very sharply, hoping to finish this conversation before it began. Yumi turned to face me.

"Why are you so bitter all the time?!" she asked, vague traces of venom lacing through her statement.

"You have no business in knowing that!" I retorted, facing her. Within seconds, the peace of the glowing, half-moon night was shattered with both our voices going back and forth with white-hot anger.

"Well,_sorry_ hot-shot! It's just that ever since you've came here; our entire group has been having difficulties. There's something about you that just _does_that! I mean, look at Aelita!"

"It's_my_ fault that she's running off and kissing every random boy that crosses her path? _My_ fault?! Sounds like personality disorder to me!"

"I dare you to say that about my friend again, you…you…," Yumi bit her lip to keep her tongue from swearing, though I pretty much knew what she wanted to say.

"Son of a bitch, right? I'm a bastard son of a bitch, is that what you were going to say?!"

"You know what, nevermind the fact that I don't swear that often. _Yes_, that's exactly what I think! A _player_, too! You're nothing but a simple player! A bastard, playing, son of a _bitch_!!"

My eyes flashed with anger.

"How the hell did your parents raise you? Are you some sort of spoiled brat? Did your daddy let you do anything you wanted? Did your mommy buy you anything you wanted?" she spat.

The ice is getting thinner, Yumi…

"God…I can't believe I even began to _think_ that you were…half-decent! And why? Why don't you want your report card sent home? What _bad_ would it do? Would daddy throw a tantrum? Would mommy slap you—,"

"Shut up," I growled, "Shut up, or you can fuck just _miles_ of off." I warned her. Being the overly confident hot-head that she is, she ignored me.

"Insults and intimidation won't work on me they way they do on Aelita. I swear, if I ever find you near her again I will beat the living crap out of you. Then when you go home, mommy won't even recognize you you'd be so beaten!"

"I'm warning you…,"

"Well, don't. The cafeteria was a different matter. Odd is my friend. You mean nothing to me. You're worse than _dirt_ to me,"

"I don't give a shit what you think," I said, "I don't think I ever will."

"That's very contradictory, don't you think? If you're warning me about all this crap, you must give _some_ sort of shit about this!"

I flinched. All she had to say now were the key words to unlock my building fury and…

"Well, maybe I guess mommy taught you _something_ worthwhile! Bra-vo, Mrs. Anders! Great job on teaching your son to warn others when he's about to throw his little temper tantrum! Too bad you couldn't teach him how _not_ to be the spoiled bitch you were when _you_ grew up—,"

Blinded by my anger, I acted with only one thought in my mind.

_You don't talk about her that way!!!_

_SLAP!!!_

Yumi's head flew back at an angle, exposing the bottom side of her chin. Strands and locks of her hair fell across her face from the force of the slap, shadowing her eyes. Time froze as Yumi didn't move, keeping her swept back look. Realization hit me as soon as the horrifying sound of palm meeting face rang in my ears, and my face changed from ferocity to surprised fear.

"Nnn…," I said, too shocked to form any human words. Yumi slowly rolled her head back, though she kept her gaze and face down, gingerly touching her reddening right cheek. She took her hand away and looked at her fingers, rubbing them together.

Did my eyes deceive me? Was that…blood? Was there blood on Yumi's fingers?

My vision became blurry, and colors mixed together, swirling and dancing around and causing way too much confusion. I rapidly blinked my eyes, waiting for them to re-focus. When they did, something was wrong. Every color I ever knew, cerulean, shamrock, amethyst purple, orange, yellow, chocolate…all of them were gone, faded to black and white, with shades of gray.

Except for one color.

Red was the only one I saw now. Yumi's shirt, the dyed locks of hair, the cherry blossom design on her pant leg, and the blood, the most prominent one, on her fingers—those were the only colors I saw. Everywhere, if there was red, I saw it stand out against black and white. I couldn't believe it.

I was seeing red.

I looked down at the hand that slapped her, at the palm. My eyes caught on something on the zipper of it, and I moaned when I realized that when I had hit her across the cheek, the zipper of my glove had caught some of her skin, causing her to bleed a bit. I glanced up, noticing the mark on her face that I left—the blood smeared around the wound.

Not only that, but all the fire that Yumi had been attacking me with had completely disappeared. It surprised me greatly, for this wasn't the normal reaction of the Yumi I used to know! The Yumi I used to know would give some sort of a war cry and launch her self at me, fist and foot!

Where had the fire in her eyes gone…?

"Yu…Yum…Are…nnnn…I…,"

Confusion clouded my brain, and I was stuck between two choices: Help, or run.

I took a step forward, reaching out a hand to maybe help her, but then retreated it. Sweat rolled down my forehead as I struggled to take another step back, stumbling a bit along the way.

_To hell with what the heck I was doing…_

_What the hell have I done?_

"Did…Did…n't…nnn…Muth, muth…," My voice dropped to nearly inaudible reaches as I finished the word I was struggling to say through everything. I could tell that Yumi could still hear.

"Nnno…no…I can't be like…not him…no…," Gritting my teeth, I bit back my tears. Finally, I shouted, "God_damn_it!!!" and turned around, racing off into the dark foreboding woods, despite the jell-o feeling my legs were suddenly sporting. How could I have done this? How? _Why_, Goddamnit, _why?!_

And let me tell you, both Ulrich and Reese were lamenting that night.

LUDICROUS: Ludicrous speed, GO!

Dear amazing God, how Odd can you get?!

For how long I was running, I haven't the faintest. Could've been a full hour for all I care, because I wasn't paying attention to anything. Branches scraped me, roots tripped me, I didn't even notice. I simply got up, and continued to run.

Eventually, I found myself blocked by a humongous rock face. It was climbable, I'll give it that, but because of my Vertigo condition, it looked ten times as big as it probably was. But height wasn't crossing my mind. No, nothing but red was crossing my mind, as if it were a drug.

The tears that I bit back before were now getting stronger and stronger, screaming to show themselves. Insanity broke through me, and as I stared at the brick wall I thought, _Hell…To hell with it!_ And I tore off my gloves.

The rock face was smooth, yet finely rough. I closed my eyes tightly, creating creases on my face, resting my forehead against the cool stone. Somehow, it felt as though it accepted me with open arms, inviting my bizarre way of punishment even more.

It was one punch at first—just one hard punch to the rock. But soon it escalated, adding one punch over the other. One after the next, over and over again. Hot tears flowed down my face, the vision of Yumi feeling her cheek in pain never leaving my mind. Each punch had twice the force of the last as I alternated hands, endlessly assaulting the rock with my fists. As I punched, I could feel the nerves die in my hand, driving me to punch even harder. Without the nerves telling me that this hurt, I had no reason to stop.

When I had started, I thought I was only going to do a few punches, but nothing too severe. I wasn't going to act like I was trying to split the rock, building up until all of my human force was into the punches. No, I thought I was just going to lightly punish myself, nothing too bad.

But I didn't even acknowledge how far I had disappeared into the monotony; even when my knuckles exploded, spilling more of that dastardly red color everywhere, onto the rock face, onto my hands, and the splatter of it from pulling back my fists and such staining my shirt and parts of my pants. That's when the pain came screaming back at me, here to stay until I really did stop.

And yet, I refused my instincts. I kept punching, even after blood was being drawn from my fists. A distinguished blot now dribbled down the rock face, large and gruesome-looking. Crimson stains stood out everywhere, all coming from the same person.

Me.

I don't know how long I punched it. I don't know how long I stayed there. Could've been an hour or so, but it felt like two. Finally, when my rage was at its peak, I gave one last punch into the rock, but this time I held it against it. Ramming my forehead into the cool rock, not caring if it was on the bloodstain or not, I screamed out loud in frustration, twisting my knuckles into the rock. When I ran out of breath, I screamed again, only this time through gritted teeth. Tears coursed down my cheeks and onto the stone, mingling with the blood. Without warning, I was overtaken with a wave of exhaustion.

Keeping my hand on the face, I slid down diagonally, turning so my back was to the rock My hand smeared part of the discoloring of the rock near me as I slumped to my seat, trembling and sobbing with crippled insanity. For a split second, I thought I saw a figure duck down behind a tree out past this clearing and in the woods. I blinked, and blamed it on my madness.

As sleep started to wrap its arms around me with drugged jerking and prodding, I began to mumble out curses to two (or three) very specific people.

"God fucking damn you…Reese…,

"God fucking damn you…Ulrich…,"

I fell asleep almost immediately after my last curse was whispered into the coils of wind in the night.

"God fucking damn you…Father…,"

My eyes rolled upwards as my head lolled over to the side as my heavy breathing became a steady rhythm signaling my sleep. Blackness took me down to pits I never even knew existed, and laughed at my pitiful state.

Reese and Ulrich trembled, not even caring what happened to them. After all, they just couldn't take their mind off of one person.

Yumi…

* * *

Oh, by the way, I wonder if any of you noticed at the beginning.

Shakespeare...Whoring...Addict.

Just thought you'd like to know.


	9. Macbeth

Short time to do this, but read it anyway.

I _told _you that I was a complete Shakespeare whore. All of the information about Macbeth put into this chapter was not researched--rather, it was read.

Shakespeare is a God.

By the way, I've been forgetting to mention, take a look at my profile if you haven't recently.

I doubt you'll be disappointed.

* * *

Chapter Nine: Macbeth

_Imaginarily Realistic_

I was falling down through a massive world consisting of cold blackness. As I fell I felt strange hand-tendril things pass me by, grazing me as if to snatch me away into their own little nightmare town where they could have the most fun with me in terrorization. Falling limply, I paid barely any attention to them as I shivered in cold sweat. Angry screeches and roars spawned from the dark, and the tugs became harder and more violent. Even though I was still falling, I was being stretched as if to be torn limb from limb. My tendons and muscles whined in protest as my bones popped with each hard pull. I blinked.

The moans and screeches became more frequent, and the black wrapped around me as the pull of gravity angrily fought for my gain. A rugged sound uttered from my gently gritted teeth, weary and soft. The blackness began to retreat, even though it was still trying to pull me back. My body undulated with the tugs and pulls, carelessly allowing them to do anything they liked to me. Gravity urged me downward, away from the blackness. Despite the blackness's strength, I broke away.

Headfirst I fell straight down, accompanied by glowing rains of something that reminded me of meteorites; the only difference was that when the rains were close enough, I could vaguely see screaming faces of pain imbedded in the fire. Most were feminine.

Bitter feelings flooded my heart as wind rushed past me, and I swallowed down the hollow sensation of regret. I felt…free, yet hateful. As the hate burned in me, the meteorites began to cackle madly. Pain turned into cruel merriment, which only made me angrier. I clenched my fists, and Reese's voice echoed in the dying sky. It was strange though, because Reese's voice was laced with raw, frantic fear, which totally contradicted my last 'encounter' with him.

"There's daggers in these smiles…! Get them away, away! Out, Damnit, out!"

I landed rather gently in a ring of fire even though I toppled over myself, landing stomach-down in dark ash and debris. Reese cried to my left, calling me to stand.

"Boiling trouble! You toil, you trouble! Up, stand up! Quickly! Now!"

Uneasily I slid up like a snake, weakly standing and facing Reese. His eyes were wide, born with panic, and his mouth was open to allow hyperventilation. He talked very quickly, eyes wildly searching around, waiting for an enemy to jump out of the fire.

"Fire, burn! This is foul, and foul is fair! Fair is foul, and foul is fair!" Reese shoved his hands in my face, begging me for help.

"All the perfumes in Arabia will never sweeten these hands…Blood! Filth! Out, damned spot, out!!"

Everything Reese was spitting out at me hardly made any sense…before something in my mind clicked. The words he was saying, in the succession he was saying them…Haven't I heard them before, like, in Language Arts class?

Before I could open my mouth to ask, Reese crazily grabbed my upper arms and squeezed them. I let out a pained expression as he made wild accusations, confirming my inquiry.

"Macbeth! Macbeth! Beware Macduff!!" He screamed.

Jesus Christ, _Macbeth!_ Reese was quoting Shakespeare's Macbeth! Holy Hell! Shakespeare in my nightmares? I didn't even know I knew this many quotes from him!

"M-Macduff?" I asked uncertainly. Reese shook me vigorously.

"Macduff will kill Macbeth! Macbeth, thou art Macbeth!" Crazed and foaming at the corners of his mouth, Reese pounded the knowledge into my head, "Macduff will be the death of you! Listen, God, listen, I beg of you!"

Reese grabbed my face, his hands dripping with blood. My features became smeared with blood as he continued to rant on.

"Will it take all of Neptune's great ocean to wash this blood clean from my hands? It's her blood! Her blood! Macduff's blood, it's hers!"

Wait—wasn't Macduff a man? Or are we speaking in a figurative sense? Is the death of me, this Macduff, is it going to be a girl that will kill me? Eventually?

"Wait, Reese please!" I pleaded. Reese moaned as his head lolled around, seemingly out of control, "Tell me, please, who is Macduff? Can I avoid it?"

"What's done is done…," Reese murmured, his hands sliding to my shoulders, still gushing blood. "It's too late. Too late. Macduff…Macduff…you cannot change it…Macduff…," It looked like he was going to say more, when someone else interrupted him.

A voice of a young toddler pierced its way through, the voice directed solely at me—or Reese. Both of us, actually. Reese jerked his head up, frightened as a rabbit as the scream called out, ringing bells in our hearts.

"Bruggerrrrrrr!!!" the little girl screamed.

"No…," muttered Reese, "No…! Macduff, they're here! It's here! Macbeth…!" For some reason when he said it, I looked at him as if he had said my name. Though his words suggested calm confidence, the tone of his voice clearly said otherwise.

"When shall we meet again, dear Macbeth? Thunder, lightning, or rain?" his lip trembled as he finished, "Storm's coming—that's when thou shall seal thy fate…,"

The girl screamed again, louder and more desperate, "Brugg-ugg-errrrrr!!!" Reese glanced behind me, and cowered in front of whatever was behind my back.

"Macbeth…," he whimpered, "Beware Macduff!"

The girl gave one last cry, and I couldn't bear it. I swiveled my head around to look.

"No!!!" Reese screamed, a tad too late.

All I saw was a glimpse of two figures—one small, the other tall and lean. The lean one reached out to me over several meters within an instant before I could see any details on any of them. Without a moment more to spare, I was knocked out.

When I awoke I found myself splayed out in the ashes, near the edge of the clearing of fire. My head throbbed hotly as I uneasily sat up. I put a gloved hand to my forehead, and realized that I was now 'Reese.' Or, what was better to say, Reese and I had molded into a normal person now. It surprised me to find myself still in this cage of a dream, but before I could poke around, someone grabbed my shirt and violently pulled me up with one hand, effortlessly.

"Whuh…What?!" I breathed. After all, I was staring into the blank, pupil-less eyes of a zombie that resembled none other but the Ulrich from two years ago. The other difference was that he was ten times stronger and seemed a little bigger than before. He grinned evilly, letting that grin literally stretch up to the outside corners of his eyes, similar to the Grinch.

"Fool. Pathetic…little fool," he snickered in my face. I choked back a gag as his breath—rank of road kill and rotting things—blasted my face. My legs kicked back and forth, desperate to feel ground beneath them again.

"Who…Who are you?" I asked. The grin stretched even wider, I swear!

"I'm the Ghost of Christmas Past!" he mocked in a high, impolite voice, making fun of Reese's sudden connection with literature. His voice became nasty and evil as he continued. "Long story short, your past will come back to bite you in the butt, asshole!" As soon as he said the last word, he spat right into my face. Rancid saliva ran down my chin, feeling like acid. I couldn't do anything. I was helpless.

I…_hate_…being helpless.

"Let 'im go!!!" The little girl from before screamed, pounding her pudgy fists into this Zombie Ulrich's leg. I tried to glance down to get a better look at her, but I couldn't. Zombie Ulrich wouldn't let me.

"Fuck off, twit!" Zombie Ulrich carelessly said, kicking the poor thing straight into the fire behind me. I heard one last call from her, followed by inhuman screeching that resembled pain, then she was eerily quiet. I winced, my eyesight gazing past the zombie in front of me. Her last scream echoed in my head hauntingly, and somehow, I seemed to feel her last pain.

"Bruggerrrrrrrrrrr!!!"

"Who…who was that girl?" I chattered, "What was she saying…?"

The zombie smirked.

"Oh come now, you don't even recognize her? Spitting image of your mother, you know!"

My heart just about stopped. I was lost in nostalgia, my thoughts drifted to Mother. This calm lasted for about one more second, before it was brutally interrupted.

_SHHHUCCCK!!!_

Blood exploded from my mouth as I screamed in terrible pain, flailing helplessly above the ground. Zombie Ulrich let out a quiet cackle. Well, quiet compared to my screaming. I guess it amused him to have his arm shoved up my belly. Not through my stomach, _up_my stomach—right up my torso. He kept shoving more and more of his arm in further, each shove causing me unbearable screaming pain. I wanted to cry for him to stop, but he didn't. An alien-like feel came to me as he forced his arm into my torso, and I felt him rise up higher in my chest underneath my skin.

God, it hurt so much. Whoever said that you couldn't feel pain in dreams should be shot.

When he was elbow deep, he paused, taking delight as tears cascaded down from my eyes, snot dribbled down from my nose, and blood flowed down from my mouth. I mixed my groans with yells, trying to break free from this zombie; but no matter what I did each movement I made hurt like hell.

Christ, this _was_ hell.

After he seemed satisfied in watching me suffer, the clawed hand that was now inside of me flexed itself, and wiggled around.

I yowled like a wolf.

He twisted his entire arm around so his palm was now facing the rest of me, and fingered around my rib cage like it was a piano. I gritted my teeth, sobbing as I struggled to keep it all in. Blood squirted out from between my teeth with each sob I took. Glee crossed Zombie Ulrich's face as he tinkered around for a bit more, until he found the sternum.

Something along the lines of hunger flashed in his glazed eyes, and he curled his nasty claws in between the ribcage and around the bone. I could only imagine what he wanted to do. I didn't want to go through it.

_Wake up, Damnit! Wake up, wake up, wake up!! Now!!!_

I twisted and turned, trying to force myself to rip my spirit from this dream and into the real world. Sweat rolled down my forehead, mixing with the bodily liquids already rolling down my face. I scrunched my eyes closed tight, trying to wish myself away. Feeling an out-of-body experience, I realized I was close to succeeding, and tried harder.

"Oh no, please don't wake up! Please, please, please! Stay asleep, please!" Someone, a girl, pleaded. She wasn't anywhere in sight, and the voice seemed to come from somewhere either in my head or from heaven, because it had a small echo to it like you would hear when a character is thinking in a movie.

"Don't wake up…!" she pleaded me. I don't know why, but through some act of craziness, I obeyed. But no matter what I did, I concentrated on the possible location of this voice, where it came from. I focused on her, and the pain wasn't half as bad.

It was hard to do that, but I put all of my energy into doing it. I closed my eyes calmly this time, and tried to reach out to her gentle, yet slightly scared voice.

"Oh…thank god…," she whispered, relieved. Somehow, hearing the relief in her voice rubbed off on me, and I felt relieved too. Zombie Ulrich scowled, and punched his claws around and into my lungs and heart, but for some reason I couldn't feel it anymore. It was barely potent—a mere itch in the chest.

What I could feel was some sort of soft, wet sensation slowly moving about my face, wiping it clean from anything that was on it.

It suddenly occurred to me like this felt like I was dipping in and out of reality and dreamland. I stirred and twitched a little bit, and I heard the girl wince and suck in a gasp. Curios, I creaked my eyes open.

Dead tired, I only had a second or two to catch my bearings before I fell back down into slumber. I was surprised that I didn't find myself up against the rock—rather, my head was resting in someone's lap.

Whoever it was they were now frozen, completely unable to find the power to move. They held a damp towel against my scarred cheek, as they had been wiping some of the blood that smeared onto it from the rock off. I gave one of my shoulders a little shrug as I readjusted myself, turning so instead of sleeping on my back I was sleeping on my side, with the back of my head to the person's stomach.

As I rolled, I saw a quick flash of two red streaks bordering a gentle face staring down at me. My mind never even processed the fine details of this until much later. All I thought of was this:

_She saved me from a nightmare…_

And with that, I fell back asleep.

COLORFUL: Bright and happy, and for everyone to know it.

They should add a pink color to the rainbow.

The next time I woke up, it was early morning, the dew shining on the leafless branches in the cold sunlight. My black jacket had been removed and now served me as a pillow, replacing the lap of the girl last night.

The girl…there were two, weren't there? No, one was in my dream, and the other was the one in reality. Who was the one in reality? I strained my mind to answer this question, knowing that I caught a glimpse of her face. It took me a minute, then I recalled the two red streaks hanging down around her features. My eyes widened in surprise.

That was…Yumi? After what I'd done to her, that was…Yumi?

Before I could ask myself why she would do that, something else came screaming back from last night. I now remembered the symptom that I received when I slapped her, and all the red that I saw. Most of that red was blood—

_Blood!_

I turned on my heel to look at the rock face, suddenly panicking. If that giant bloodstain was still there, who knows what people would think of…

…think of a viciously scrubbed to clean almost all of the blood off of the…bare rock.

Christ, she cleaned the rock _too_? Wasn't my face enough for her?

_Apparently not…_I thought to myself grimly as I stared down at my hands. They were wrapped in thick bandages, just enough to restrict the blood to bleed through and show. And she did all of this when I was _sleeping_? It's no wonder why I can't remember the nightmare I had last night!

I shook my head, because I knew something about that dream was direly important to me. Someone had warned me about something that I absolutely needed to remember. This was the problem when I didn't have a piece of paper right there for me to write things down. I'll forget everything that happened, such as this.

But then again, I don't even remember squat about anything in the dream. The last thing I remember before my brief awakening was sliding away from the rock and cursing my two personas and my father. After that, total darkness.

I shook my head, noting on the time, and put on my damp jacket. As I briskly walked back to Kadic I took a glance at the sky and noticed overly dark clouds on their way. Something triggered about that in my head, and I remembered a line from someplace I couldn't recall.

_Storm's coming—that's when thou shall seal thy fate…,_

Blinking, I adjusted my coat collar snugly against my neck, blocking out the chill of the wind. Sometimes life just doesn't add up.

OBJECTION: The author has no comments here. (she's busy playing Phoenix Wright)

Jeremy did it.

Health class came sooner than needed in the morning. I sat down in my usual spot, waiting for Yumi to arrive. Or, no, wait, let me rephrase that. I sat down in my usual spot alone, for Yumi still had to arrive. There. Doesn't sound as anxious now.

Yumi sat down quietly, seeming to be embarrassed. I wasn't really expecting a 'Good Morning' from her now, and I was right; she didn't say it, but she did say something else.

"D…Does 'Macduff' mean anything to you…?"

My head was confused at first, and I turned to look at her.

"No…," I said, a little gentle, "…why?"

Yumi sucked in a breath and turned away, not willing to answer. Contrary to her, I let out a breath and leaned back in my seat, keeping my hands underneath the table. I had replaced the thick bandages with something thinner, since they were already scabbed up, and put my gloves over that to hide the evidence. After a while, she found the courage to speak again.

"What about…Beth? Does Beth mean anything…?" I thought for a minute. These names sounded familiar, but I couldn't remember where I had heard of them before. I shook my head, and Yumi took in another breath.

"Beth or Macduff…," I pondered under my breath, "Macduff…Beth…Mac…," My eyes widened, and I sat straight up, saying a little loudly.

"Mac_beth_! That was it! Macbeth!"

The teacher, who was two seconds away from starting the lesson, gave me a grave stare. I waved an apology, and slouched back down, my mind racing furiously as the entire dream came back.

_There's daggers in these smiles…!_

_Boiling trouble! You toil, you trouble!_

_Fire, burn! This is foul, and foul is fair! Fair is foul, and foul is fair!_

_All the perfumes in Arabia will never sweeten these hands…Blood! Filth! Out, damned spot, out!_

_Macbeth! Macbeth! Beware Macduff!_

Yumi watched with curiosity as I feverishly scribbled every word down that Reese had said to me in my dream last night. Health lesson was lost to the both of us, and seeing as we were in the back of the class, the teacher never noticed.

"Those quotes…," Yumi whispered to me, "They're all from Macbeth…only, they're a little different,"

"Like…?" I asked, shooting a quick glance at her. Her yin-yang necklace dangled down, almost grazing the table. She pointed to one and explained.

"There, this one: Boiling trouble, you toil, you trouble…well, first that's horrible grammar, but second, the real line is 'Boil, boil, toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble.' It came from the three witches that Macbeth visited—,"

"You know all this?" I asked, surprised. Sure, she studied it at one point, but it seems odd that she would memorize this much. Yumi hid a blush and plainly stated that her mother was a Shakespeare freak.

After a few minutes more of pondering and scribbling on the paper, Yumi and I found out that we couldn't make head or tail about the dream. I hid some information from her so we wouldn't get too far anyways, like who told me this and so on. Still, Yumi was somewhat of a help with deciphering possible meanings for the messages. Some of them didn't seem quite right and were scratched pretty quickly, but one stood out against the others.

"It's scary…it almost sounds like…," Yumi drifted, staring through the piece of scrap paper. I looked at her, expectant for her to continue.

"Like…like a warning sign. For danger…or…I don't know…," She shook her head, "Dreams scare me—especially the nightmares. They're always so…psychic,"

I blinked at her. Out of everything I knew…I didn't know that Yumi was scared of dreams. I doodled a random little squiggle on the paper, mind drifting off to Japanese lessons to where lots of people messed up the name 'Yumi' with the word 'yume,' which just_happened_ to mean 'dream' itself.

Before I knew it, the squiggle turned into half a yin-yang. Hastily I erased it, brushing off the eraser shavings. I didn't look over to check if Yumi had noticed or not. Behind my shirt my necklace bounced against my chest in glee. I felt like I should shut that pendant up somehow. It was like an annoying supportive character that really didn't give any good information at all—it was just there to annoy the owner; like that stupid fairy in Odd's old Nintendo game.

Yumi tapped her own pencil on the table in contemplation, her nails barely skimming past her thin lips in concentration. After a while, she pointed to a word with a question mark after it that I circled for importance and asked, "Do you know what that means?"

Hands busy with themselves underneath the table, I stared at it, trying to make head or tail of the simple, weird word pronounced as 'brugger.'

"Well, uh, the person who said it was a girl—young, I think. I never really got to see her. She, um, screamed it, actually. Loud and long, too. It's still ringing in my ears even now."

A small fraction of her nail slipped past her lips, and she gently chewed on it thoughtfully.

"Young…like, two or three?" she asked. I shrugged, and said that was probably right. Yumi gave her pencil two more taps then set it down.

"Toddler-talk…," she murmured, "mmm…It could _possibly_ mean 'brother.' I mean, in a family with more than two children and one is in their toddler stage…they would look up to their older sibling, right…?" she asked rhetorically. I kept staring at the piece of paper. Indeed, it was the most probable meaning to this mystery word. It was the best definition that fit in the blank.

So…if the little girl was crying out for her brother, and Zombie Ulrich mentioned that she was a spitting image of my mother…did that mean that I have an uncle from my mother's side out there?

Maybe it was bad family ties that kept her mouth shut about talking about him, but was it really possible that I had an uncle out there that could possible take me in for a while—at least, when this was all over?

If it would ever be over…?

Whatever it was, information given to Yumi on that note was swiftly and strictly forbidden. When she asked about any reason why the girl would be in my dream, I shook my head and said that I had no idea—having no siblings of my own.

Which got me to think…what if I did have siblings? I mean, what would it be like to have one? Preferably I'd like a younger one—despite all of the horror stories Yumi tells all the time about Hiroki. Brother or sister, at this point I really couldn't care less. Either way would be wonderful for me.

The health teacher clapped her hands to give a theatric visual for everyone, and Yumi and I tore apart to concentrate on what was still left of the lesson. But even despite that, I could tell that neither of us was really paying attention as hard as we were trying.

Lunch came and went. Language arts came and went with much application to Macbeths' literature, quotes, and meanings. Needless to say, almost nothing fit together in the end—even with all that research. Yet, this isn't what I'm supposed to say. No, Macbeth was (surprisingly) _not_ the spotlight of the day.

Halfway through language arts, Mr. Delmas made an announcement over the intercom.

"_Students and faculty, please remain calm. All personnel are to be evacuated to basements and boiler rooms immediately. There is a tornado warning for the city area, and should arrive within half an hour. Students, if you are separated from your class follow a faculty member to the nearest basement area. This is not a drill. Thank you_,"

It seems to be when the principal says don't panic, everybody does. The sky outside had been dark all day, but just now it had gotten so dark you couldn't read a book outside if you wanted to. The sky had a tinge of sick tropical green to it, fringed with yellow in the clouds. That was enough to get everyone talking and over-acting the drama queen role.

Because the safest and closest area to evacuate to from the language room was the boiler room, our entire class plus a few others had to travel outside for a minute or so. I followed everyone from behind for some sort of reassuring quirk of mine.

The wind was already violent, whipping hair straight in a random direction with ease and flapping jackets uncomfortably. My collar whapped against my jaw and my neck so hard and so much there was a light red sore from where it did. Trees were waving wildly, remaining leaves torn off like someone punting a tennis ball. Weak branches were already being ripped off carelessly and tumbling about in a mid-air invisible roller-coaster ride. Kids and teachers alike had to nimbly avoid them as best they could. Jim got tangled in an especially twisted one, while a little seventh grade boy a few people in front of me got bopped in the head with a light, dead, yet thick branch of wood. He dropped behind, disoriented as he rubbed a new bleeding wound on his forehead. In the distance, thunder crackled with insane glee, as if to release a long-kept rage that was itching to get out for years. It was soft now, but any idiot could tell that it was about to get louder than a jet plane at mach seven around here way too soon. Flashes of dancing skeleton light spider-webbed the black wall of rain in the distance, prissily tormenting and mocking everyone who dared to look. Howls of wind gusted past under the arches, mourning and giving ghostly feelings and goose bumps all around. It was going to be one hell of a storm if it was still, oh, about twenty-five minutes off.

The seventh-grader with the wound wobbled around as we got closer to the boiler room, suddenly right in front of me. I put a hand to his back to keep him upright, and gently herded him into the right place. Jeremy, Aelita, and Odd were conversing lowly just inside, and I managed to catch a smidgen of their conversation.

"Are you sure this isn't Xana? You know he's been cooking up something good for a week or so!" Odd argued, looking distantly worried. Jeremy shook his head.

"Though it's a really late autumn storm, and we hardly get tornados here anyways, there's no sign that Xana's done anything,"

Aelita intervened with a good point, "Are you sure he hasn't attacked the super scan at all?"

Jeremy answered kind of frostily, probably still hurting from yesterday, "Yes, I'm sure, because the landline connection was positively working, as well as my laptop,"

Aelita looked down at her feet, which were drawing imaginary shapes on the smooth concrete floor. It was obvious she was ashamed, but hey, what are you going to do? Nothing can turn out perfect.

I was about two steps inside when Jim, who was holding the door, asked Mr. Delmas, "Is that everyone, sir?"

Mr. Delmas sounded pained and worried as he answered.

"No…we're missing three from all classes combined," he said. Jim's stomach rumbled a bit when he replied.

"Just three? Well, where are they?"

Mr. Delmas took off his glasses and wiped them, explaining lowly in both tone of voice and volume, "No one knows for sure, but we deducted that they were in the park. The storm has picked up a marvelous amount of speed, and we don't know if we could find them in time. Pray that they make it out safe—this is the worst storm we've faced in thirty years,"

Jim nodded sagely (which was actually quite hilarious) as he began to slowly close the door, "Who were these three, so we could keep an eye out for them? And, what were they doing out in the park?"

Mr. Delmas put his glasses back on the indent on his nose and slowly said.

"Miss Milly Solovieff and Tamiya Diop have been doing a report on foreign countries for a while now, you know that, right? Well, anyways, they've been requesting for students with ethnic backgrounds to come out into the park in the middle of class, simply because this report is taking so much time. I ordered the teachers to accept this, for it's becoming quite an interesting segment. Er, anyway, I got side-tracked. Miss Milly and Tamiya were interviewing Miss Yumi Ishiyama—,"

Before Mr. Delmas had begun her last name, I had bowled into him, bowled into Jim, slammed the door wide open with the help of the wind vacuum, and sprinted straight outside to the park entrance with long, determined strides leaping over pockets of wind in my crazed egotistical moment, despite the loud cries of shock from the faculty behind me. It sounded like they were about to come after me, but the storm bit back at them, and they closed the doors with an ending boom.

After that, I felt like I was trapped out there during Hell on Earth.

OVER-RULED: Authority calls from the judge! (more Phoenix Wright)

Authority calls from Yumi!

Mr. Delmas had said that the storm had sped up a lot, so I wasn't sure of how much time I had anymore. Less than twenty minutes, I knew that. By the time I got to the park it was as dark as night, so I knew that the storm was only moments away. With this in mind, I didn't hesitate to sprint forward into the woods, the bare trees resembling the bottom fangs of a beast's mouth. A small shudder ran up and down through me a few times as my first strides into the forest brought the first huge droplets of rain splattering everywhere and anywhere.

The first method of search and rescue that came to my mind was shouting past the top of my lungs, but for some reason I wanted to scratch that. Maybe it was the fact of the thunder getting close to ground-rumbling standards. Who knows? Despite that, I still cried at the top of my voice.

"Milly!!! Tamiya!!! Yumi!!!" A quick glance left and right, and I dashed ahead ten meters and shouted again.

"_Tamiya!!! Milly!!! Yumi!!!_" Still no luck. I was suddenly down to the hard part of the 'search' in search and rescue.

Getting on your hands and knees, and overturning every freakin' leaf you see just to find them.

_Krakka-Krakka BANG!!!_

I shot a glance at the sky, grimacing as I realized the storm was pretty much almost here. There wasn't even time to count out a second between the lightning flash and that roaring thunder roll. I sucked in a breath, and shouted again as I plunged off of the path and into the woods, hoping I was in the right direction.

"_Yumi!!! Milly!!! Tamiya!!!__Answer_ me, dammit!"

Was I scared? Well, duh. First tornado in thirty years with a storm like this to cover it—who wouldn't be scared?

I tore off a branch that had fallen on the old sewer cap when I found myself there, hopeful that maybe, just maybe, Yumi had led them to hide down there. Cupping my hands around my mouth, I called down.

"Milly, Tamiya, Yumi!!! Are you there?!!" Pressing my ear against the hole in the cap, I listened as best I could with the ear-splitting noise all around. The rain splatters were a little more common now as the storm picked up savageness. I shook my head in frustrated disappointment, and stood up. They couldn't have gotten much farther than this. There was only one conclusion:

I had chosen the wrong way.

Roaring in frustration, I turned around and ran back. When I hit the path I tripped and slid over the barely-wet dirt. A muscle twanged down near my ankle—not too bad, but still enough to be noticed. I bit my tongue to keep in my cry, and stumbled back up awkwardly, my legs already running before I was ready. Adrenaline, adrenaline. What_would_ I do without you?

As soon as I broke into the woodsy part of the opposite side of the path, I began screaming out once again.

"_Tamiya, Milly, Yu—_,"

_FLASH—KRUCK-KOOM!_

Barely enough to say 'one.' It was basically here. I growled before I called out again.

"_MILLY, TAMIYA, YUMI!!!_" I turned around in a few circles, cursing nothing in particular when I didn't hear a reply. I couldn't hear anything.

I wanted to scream. I wanted to just scream 'SHUT UP' to God so I could find the three girls. Hell, I wanted them to scream. I wanted them to scream like some zombie psychopathic maniac was shoving an arm up their torso. I just wanted _to find them_.

_Storm's coming—that's when thou shall seal thy fate…,_

Oh man, not that crap again. Not _now_!

"_Scream, dammit!!!_" I shouted, not wanting to give up but being left with no other choice, "_MILLY!!! TAMIYA!!! YUUUUMIII!!!_"

Nothing but the beastly wind and cracking of wood answered me. I wanted to kick something where it _really_ hurt. Why me?! Why them? Okay, it didn't matter who it was, it's just that when you put two young girls with one that I…like…in danger, something just snaps in my brain. Given, if it were anyone else I would do the same thing—but to tell the truth I don't think I would feel as bad if I couldn't find them like this.

_Give up._ That's all that suddenly came into my head. _Go back, now, before the storm really settles in! Leave them! Save yourself!_

Aelita's gray marine-rainbow eyes flashed in my mind, angry and stubborn.

_At this point in time, giving up is the last thing you should even think about doing, Mister! You said so yourself two seconds ago: "But isn't love the reason why I'm doing this?" Well, if it is—which it IS—then stop moping and stop acting like it's the last day on all earth and you just want to go end it all. Do we have a deal?!_

And just as soon as that quote finished in my head, a miracle bloomed in the midst of chaos.

It was faint, but definitely there. Someone was desperately calling out through the unbearable din.

Someone that seemed closer than real to me. I whacked my head a few times to see if I wasn't making it up, and listened. A few seconds of edgy pause passed, then the voice tried again, just a tad louder. And like a rocket, I was off, crying like a freakin' madman all along the way.

"I hear you!!! Keep calling!!! Keep Calling, I'm coming!!!" Leaping over dark molds of debris, trying see through the madness yet at the same time trying to keep dust out of my eyes, I followed the voice with all my heart, praying, just praying that I wasn't too late. Before I knew it, we were screaming together.

"Where are you, where are—,"

"—you must hurry, please hurry! We're over here, over—,"

"—here, please be here please—,"

"—come quickly, we won't be safe for very long, please we aren't—,"

"—safe, promise me you're safe, one more cry, just one more—,"

"—moment, don't waste another, just come—,"

And completely in unison, "—_Please!!!_"

"Here!" Yumi cried out desperately to my immediate left. I spun on my heel, and spotted them. Milly and Tamiya were pathetically crouched on Yumi, who was obviously trying to get them behind her so they wouldn't be hurt—but there simply was not enough room. They were in a shallow ditch right underneath an old sycamore that wavered about dangerously with the foul winds. It was the best ditch they could find, and in this darkness without knowing where to go, they were completely trapped.

Just as I was kneeling down to help them get up, a blinding white flash of hot lightning seared across the sky, seeming to skim the tops of the trees. There was absolutely no pause in between that and the earth quaking crack of bursting loud thunder that must have rattled a mountain in its whole. As far as my rocket science goes, the storm was here.

Down came the worst of the rain like a giant quilt of endless water. Combine that with the bitter autumn winds, and it wasn't too long before we all swore we were losing our noses to frost bite. Trying to ignore this, I grabbed the collars of the two littler girls and tugged them straight back. They stumbled a bit and fell, but picked themselves up quickly. Yumi was already starting to stand up when I grabbed her outstretched hand and pulled her the rest of the way. I had a feeling she knew who I was from her reluctance of accepting my help, but in this Hell, I don't really think she cared about that for a second more.

Not an instant after she stood up did the old sycamore give a groaning creak and crack, swaying menacingly in the lightning's flashes. And when I say swaying, I mean _really_ swaying, like, near forty-five degree angle swaying. Not quite, but close enough to warn us of it collapsing.

"_GO!!!_" I screamed. Yumi grabbed Tamiya's arm and sprinted as best she could in the soppy ground. Following her example, I grabbed Milly and split. It was hard to do with this horrible wind gusting right and left, but we made do.

Lucky us, the sycamore decided to fall in the line of direction that we were running. Knowing where fewer trees were, I shouted to Yumi ahead.

"Left, dive left!"

There was no hesitation as she jumped sideways, pulling Tamiya over with her weight. I was about to do the same when I lost Milly's hand.

"Kyaaa! My ankle!!" she yelped.

Oh, come _on_.

The sycamore gave one last crack, its death rattling gasping breath, and fell, taking out a few trees with it. Without flaw I reached down blindly, grabbing the first thing that felt like Milly and shoved up and over—which just made her cry even more because I had yanked super hard on one of her pig tails. Sorry, kid, but I'm sure you'll thank me later for saving your life.

The wood and splinters that flew out and fell from the sycamore's last stand were everywhere, the lighter ones carried up by the raving wind. Suddenly, Yumi cried out next to Tamiya, who in turn tried to calm her down even though she herself was hyperventilating with panic.

"God, you girls just can't make it easier, can you?" I complained as I picked Milly up piggy-back style and squatted over Yumi.

"Shut…_up_!" Yumi retorted through gritted teeth. Uneasily she sat up and brushed off a heavy branch from her arm, "There's nothing broken, so you_better_ be grateful!" she said angrily, testing her arm like a chicken wing. Heh heh. I'm so _not_ funny.

I was about to make a smarter comment than that to her while she stood up with Tamiya, when an ear-splitting screech interrupted all means of conversation.

The screech was inhuman. It was loud, long, and metal-wrenching. It was a mix of high and low sounds, both so mind-exploding loud it makes your teeth chatter just thinking about it. It sounded like a locomotive with a full load going ninety miles an hour with loud jets flying above, and in the midst of all that there was a huge screech like some movie monster bending all the metal in the building; the metal pieces scraping against each other all at the same time.

And even through all that, I recognized what was going on.

"R-Reese…," Yumi asked me, sounding like she really didn't want to know what was going on, "What's happening…?"

"Tornado…," I said, looking at the malicious sky, "Boost your legs, we gotta make a run for it," I said. Yumi instantly protested.

"Outrun a _tornado_?! We can't do that! We've gotta find a ditch somewhere, and fast!"

"Excuse me, but finding a ditch means groping about for God knows how long in the darkness with a twister on its way, and even if we did find one, we're surrounded by giant trees and debris. We'd be crushed if we stayed here! We have to split, and _now_!" I shouted back, adjusting Milly so I could hold her more comfortably, "Trust me, we gotta try running it!"

"That's…That's_insanity!_" she cried, grabbing Tamiya's hand despite herself. She was going to add more, but an especially loud, sickening metal-against-metal scraping sound blasted by way too close for both our likings. Before we both knew it, we were stumble-racing back to the path and through the park.

"Ladies, pray to God, we're playing a Devil's game!" I said as one last reassuring (not so reassuring, actually) word to get our legs pumping.

Yumi let me run ahead of her, seeing as I had more than an idea where to go. Following my mind's eye, I navigated the twisted and hilly paths of the park, taking detours when we found an obstacle. On the final stretch through Kadic Academy's courtyard, the Devil finally caught up with us in his game.

Winds of screaming devilish doom boasted their shrieks behind and above us. It sounded a lot closer than it must have been, but still, it forced our tired legs to fight against the bone-cold rain and—ow! Hail! It was _hailing_ now! Coin-sized balls of ice pitter-patted on our heads, and if it hadn't have been for the mud that gave us traction, we would've definitely slipped and fell multiple times.

The only part of my body that felt vaguely warm was the back of my neck, where Milly had buried her face and begun to cry into. I felt sorry for her, but what more could I do?

As this sorrowful thought ran through my head, I began to count:

_Cafeteria…_

_Arches…_

_Open hallway…_

Then, finally, we saw the rusty red colored door leading into the gym storage room, and, ultimately, the boiler room. Sleet was in my eyes, but still I kept them open to make sure this wasn't a stupid illusion.

Thankfully, it wasn't.

Yumi didn't even slow down for the door—just kept running and bowled right into it so she wouldn't have to deal with wind vacuum crap. Tamiya, who was Yumi's personal rag doll in that process, caught the door just long enough for a handicapped Reese and Milly to burst through after them. The door boomed shut behind us to compliment a thunder-abundant sky.

God, it was so warm in there! And guess what? A nice, big man in a red suit to give us a welcoming committee! No, not Santa Claus, you silly! Jimbo!

"Anders…!" he said rather surprised, "Milly, Tamiya, Yumi…! Anders, you…,"

Before he said a word more, I collapsed on the floor from my sheer numbness and exhaustion. I wasn't passed out, just collapsed. And I wasn't the only one either. Both Yumi and Tamiya dropped down, as well as Milly who just simply stayed down.

Jim stooped down and picked me up, helping me support myself while calling some other faculty members to come up to fetch the girls via old-fashioned walkie-talkie. Dazed, I swayed back and forth just like the sycamore in the park, barely registering Jim's words of praise to me.

"I've got to hand it to ya, Anders. I don't know an army soldier who would do what you just did. You really do deserve a medal of courage—and much more for that amazing feat,"

Okay, despite my condition, I just couldn't help myself.

"You used to be in the army, Jim…?" I said weakly.

"Uh, duhm, I, bai…," he stuttered, "I'd…uh, rather not talk about it…,"

Hey, I was wrong, I _could_ do more than just save Milly's butt. After all, out of the corner of my icy eyes, I saw a smile creep up her features. Tamiya couldn't resist but put a word in herself.

"But please Jim, we'd love a good story!"

I exchanged a crooked smile with Milly as Jim replied once again.

"I'd…rather not talk about it…,"

* * *

Awww...happy ending. 

That's strange...o.o I wouldn't expect that from the condition I'm still in...


	10. Chrysanthemums

Really quick submission before I leave and frolic for a week or so.

* * *

Chapter Ten: Chrysanthemums

_Farewell, wherever you are_

Almost immediately we were pushed in front of the largest boiler they had there, given blankets and hot drinks—Milly and Tamiya chose watery hot chocolate while Yumi and I went with some sort of sweet cinnamon tea. Yumi was a little disgusted at the fact that the tea was sweet, but she smiled when Mrs. Meyer asked if it was alright. I really couldn't care less—it warmed my body, and that's all I needed.

Jim wrestled with a weather radio, desperately trying to find a station that was clear from the storm. He didn't find any after a full half-hour, so Mr. Delmas forced him to give up. Adding to that, he said that we'd be staying the night down here as a precaution. Some of the wilder kids happily looked to this like an awesome adventure, and immediately began kidding with each other. The more prissy ones began complaining and whining, mixing with the worried ones. Yumi, Aelita, Jeremy, and I were silent on this.

Odd, however, was part of the wilder kids. No surprise there.

After two hours or so, the "Tornado Squad" (aka Milly, Tamiya, Yumi and I) were granted permission to move about freely as we weren't diagnosed with hypothermia. We were still advised, however, that when we were to go to sleep that we should sleep near a working boiler to keep all warning of it away. Frankly, I was fine with it, until we learned that only two boilers would be kept one during the night. Milly and Tamiya took one, leaving the other to Yumi and me.

Um, I don't mean to be rude, but _ugh!_

This won't go over well.

Just before the staff ruled 'bedtime' over the students, Yumi had a quiet little talk with the rest of the gang.

"Yeah, I knew it wasn't Xana out there after a while…," she said when Jeremy asked her about any suspicion, just in case Aelita was actually right.

"Really?" Jeremy asked, "How come?"

"Well, if it were Xana, that tornado would've hit faster and right on our heads, too. Yet, we're still sitting in Kadic Academy, aren't we? And outside, we were simply in the storm, and weren't technically_targeted_ by it, and made it out alive. Besides," she added, dropping her voice in embarrassment, "Xana wouldn't have allowed, uh, someone to uh, come in and find us…,"

Aelita nodded in slow agreement, though she still looked a tad worried about something I couldn't place. I stowed that away in case I could ask her about that later, if it was important.

Odd was bouncing all over the place, marveling at Yumi and vigorously shaking her hand, hyper through and through that his friend outran a tornado. Yumi tried to discourage his false beliefs to no avail.

"Odd, the tornado was close by, that doesn't mean that it was chasing us and we outran it," she pointed out semi-seriously.

"Pish posh!" Odd exclaimed, dismissing the entire idea, "Blasphemy! Fish food! You outran it and you know it!"

"But Odd—," Yumi cried before Jeremy intervened.

"Let him be—he's off prancing in Pony Land at the moment," he said, a smug smirk on his face. Odd looked thoroughly hurt, and thus began describing his happy place to anyone who would listen.

No one did.

"Alright now!" Jim clapped his hands, "It's time for bed! Grab a mat and a blanket and lay down!"

A share of groans went all around as the sound of kids shuffling mingled with the still raging storm outside. Mats were passed out with blankets, each kid taking one a piece. Near the end of the line the mats ran out, leaving three without them: Odd, Yumi and me.

That really wasn't that big of a problem compared to the one-person blanket shortage.

"What?" Odd asked, shocked, "You're running out of blankets?!"

"There's two left, and those two are reserved for Anders and Ishiyama," Jim bluntly explained, emotionlessly showing his care for Odd.

"Reese and Yumi, Reese and Yumi!" Odd argued, "They're sleeping next to a boiler, they don't need a blanket!"

"Della Robia!" Jim scolded, "Tomorrow we'll have a talk about this attitude of yours! As for now, Yumi and Reese will get the blankets!"

Odd pouted and slinked away while Jim handed Yumi a wool blanket and gave me a worn fleece one. It didn't look like much, but it was warm and comfy. Yumi looked sorry for Odd and I could tell she was planning on giving up her blanket for him.

As we passed the place where Odd was sulkily whispering to Aelita and Jeremy, Yumi folded her blanket in preparation to give it to Odd, but because I was on their side in the first place, I figured _to heck with folding!_ and unceremoniously plopped my blanket right on Odd's head carelessly, not looking at him as I never slowed down walking past.

"Ghosts, mother, ghosts!!" he yelped as he tangled himself within the blanket. Stifled giggled murmured around the room as Jim glared at him to stop. Yumi blinked in surprise, then jogged up to me as I approached the boiler.

"Hey," Yumi said, catching my shoulder before I sat down, "Why'd you do that?" I swiped the area clean with my foot as I answered dryly.

"No mat or blanket on cold concrete floor when we're in front of a freaking boiler—I'd rather be out in the storm. Besides, I don't need it anyways," _I'm not planning on sleeping tonight…_I added in my head.

Yumi mumbled something I couldn't hear and sat down so there was enough room between her and the boiler for me to sit down. I stared at her blankly for a minute as she wrapped her blanket around her before quietly yet forcibly ordering her.

"Move,"

Yumi looked at me, confused, "What do you mean?"

"Move over next to the boiler," I said.

"But you don't have a—,"

I smirked, "You may have fooled Mrs. Meyer, but I saw your hands shaking when you thought no one was looking. Get. Near. The. Boiler."

Yumi blinked when I told her that she was hiding how cold she still was.

"I-I was just traumatized, that's all…," she murmured down at my feet. I didn't buy it.

"You may not have hypothermia, but you're still pretty cold. And don't give me this 'trauma' crap. I don't know you that well, but I can tell you're not fazed easily. Now, move…_over_!"

Yumi muttered another thing that didn't reach my ears and reluctantly scotched over, barely touching the warm metal. I sat down next to her, relieving a somewhat relaxed sigh as my back rested against the cool wall. Yumi re-adjusted the blanket so it was tighter around her, therefore making it warmer for her. I gave a quick glance over, and something flooded me.

It's hard to describe what exactly it was that I felt when I stared at her, but it was clear that it was a whole Jackson Pollock mess of different emotions.

The most prominent of these feelings was true grief as I looked at the girl I had lost through my alias. I did it on purpose and for a good cause, but nothing could ever stop me from feeling the deep cold icy pain slowly snaking about my heart and draining all the happiness from me. My throat throbbed with the exertion of holding back bitter tears from my eyes as I heard each quiet breath drawn into her lungs. They were gentle, long and smooth, calming herself down from the harsh adventure recently experienced. I gulped and coughed lightly, blinking rapidly to force back the hurt.

And I felt sorry, too. I felt sorry for everything I'm putting her through; because you know it's all my fault. But then, sorry is just a word to describe what usually is a rather shallow emotion. People may say apologies just because it's courteous to do so, but anyone hardly ever _really_ means it. 'Sorry' is a poorly used word basically made to show sympathy when you don't really have any—it's as rare as hen's teeth. But I swear there must've been a hen's tooth in my pocket because I wanted to pull Yumi close to my chest, tuck her head underneath my chin and start sobbing at how much I wanted to apologize. I guess I would ask for forgiveness too, but I wouldn't expect any after what I had done to her. At least, I would never forgive myself.

Folded in the blankets of grief and sorrow was something completely different. Something utterly warm and somehow cozy. It was warm enough for me to sprout little sweat buds all over just thinking about her. Closing my eyes to calm myself didn't help because her fine chocolate eyes glowed softly in my memory, almond-shaped and beautiful. Raven hair hung down with a natural shine around a soft, beige-tinted face bearing no mishap of acne across her cheeks. Finally as a last addition her tell-tale red locks gracefully bordered the sides of her face, gently grazing her cheeks in delicacy.

And that was only by memory.

Breathing deeply despite my choppiness, I reopened my eyes to find that Yumi had settled down on the floor and curled up with her back to the boiler. The wool blanket was swathed securely over her body with only her head and a few fingers near her neck poking out. Her breathing wasn't as steady as slumber at first, but as the minutes passed by they became softer and more relaxed, following a pattern of dreams.

That's when all of those aforementioned feelings somehow became clearer to me. Two years ago it was a premature and arrogant feeling when I looked and thought about my relationship with Yumi—it was a simple crush that happened to be pretty strong, but I think that's as far as I took it. I never really seriously considered the bud that fluttered in my heart when Yumi came to mind—in fact, I think that I thought that the bud was as far as a crush ever got. But sitting here now, with this feeling inside, I think I've realized that if I kept my train of thought that way, this would never be. Even scarier than that, I don't believe that train of thought would've changed at all if my father hadn't have whisked me away on a whim of beer. So in that way, should I be thankful? After all, during those awful two years I had unknowingly revealed to myself what this bud could blossom into, and as I watched Yumi rise and fall the cherry red of this flower bloomed on my cheeks as the knowledge flooded my brain.

I was irrevocably and deeply lost within love.

If I had said that two years before, I might as well have been lying. I didn't know what love was. All I knew was selfish emotions that had a softie tinge to them. Okay, maybe I still don't know crap about this, but I'm a hell of a lot more sure about my feelings now.

Yumi.

That was her name. Yumi. All of the sudden I couldn't prevent that name from echoing in my head constantly, over and over, overlapping each other every chance it could. Yumi, Yumi, Yumi.

Her nose scrunched up and she stirred a bit, letting out a short hum and lightly closing her fingers. After a few more seconds, she released her tension and relaxed again, resuming a normal breathing pattern.

_Yumi, Yumi, Yumi._

I couldn't help myself but to pull back strands of her hair behind her ear and away from her face. After every last one was brushed back, I grazed her lower cheek down to underneath her smooth jaw, eyes transfixed by a stranger means than just beauty. Saddened, I let my hand rest on the lower side of her cheek and jaw, in a protective yet uplifting way. Yumi's sighs became deeper, falling further into relaxation, tempting me to fall with her.

I glanced up to see Jim struggling to stay awake behind a local newspaper that was ruffled about. There, on the front page, was a picture of a dark wood casket with no flowers or personal items to decorate it, except for one framed in brass photograph tilted up against it.

Mother smiled falsely at me through the paper's ink, rather young and beautiful. The picture was about as old as I was, and it suited as the only picture they could lay up as an offering. As if to sadden the mood, the headlines clearly read:

**Brutal Murder Victim Funeral & Burial held two days ago**

_Family did not show up because of nasty forecast_

My chest twisted up, knowing that mother's side of the family lived at least an hour and a half away and three hours at the most. It's no wonder they weren't coming. Sad, though, that they still held the funeral on the specific date instead of waiting for a date that would work for the rest of the family.

My eyelids drooped as Yumi's pulse traveled through my fingers, one thought running through my mind.

_Chrysanthemums_.

LIFE-SAVER: In subtle ways to save you.

Aelita knows how to save one

I woke up at about five o'clock the next morning, the storm still going on outside but it had calmed down considerably to the point where it was just a sulky thunderstorm throwing a small tantrum. Jim was snoring loudly, Mr. Delmas was sleeping like a baby all curled up and with a clutch of blanket resembling what could have replaced a stuffed animal, with his thumb ever so close to his moustache'd mouth. Mrs. Meyer, who was either an early riser or just losing sleep over Jim's snoring, was awake and brewing some half-hearted cup of coffee. I raised my head a bit to get a better view of the room now that I seemed to be wide awake, and for a split second our eyes met.

I thought about jerking my gaze away, but I didn't because as fate had it Mrs. Meyer already knew I was awake. Her face was a bit confused at first, but then she smiled at me and turned back to her coffee. As she did that I glanced down at Yumi, who was deep in sleep with my hand still on her cheek and neck. I watched as her eyelids fluttered a bit before settling back down, her breathing still patterned. Warmth was the only thing I felt radiate about her.

Mrs. Meyer bumped something accidentally, making a noise like a plate clattering on a table. It wasn't too loud, I suppose, but in the wee hours of the morning it sounded pretty bad. She looked up at me and around her, embarrassed, then righted her coffee mug once the coffee was ready. Nobody stirred.

Silence resumed for another fifteen minutes or so as Mrs. Meyer sipped her caffeine and read last night's newspaper. Again I was reminded of that single important word.

_Chrysanthemums_._Chry-san-the-mums, Ulrich, chrysanthemums_.

Yumi trembled a bit, and began to softly moan in her sleep.

_Chrifanfanums, Mommy, chrifanfanums!_

I looked down at her, eyes half closed in mesmerized wonder. Her face contorted slightly in discomfort and she shifted her position ever so slightly.

_She laughed._

I stroked back her hair some more and carefully watched over her.

_Well, that's better than I can pronounce it, I guess…_

Yumi let out a wince and softly mumbled out a word that I could barely hear myself.

"No…," she muttered, "no, don't…,"

I brushed her cheek with my thumb, and listened intently, suddenly curious on what was going on in her dream.

"Don't leave…no, don't go…," twisting herself into a position that resembled curled pain, Yumi clutched her blanket fiercely, still murmuring what was near-nonsense to me.

_Mommy?_

Unsure of what to do, I silently looked on as her dream reached a climax.

"I don't want…you to go…I don't want you to…," she gulped down some air before she continued, "…die,"

Worry swept over me, and I began to massage her gently. Her voice, although soft, had more than enough emotion in it to maybe make Odd cry. I moved my hand to her shoulder and rubbed warmly.

_Yes?_

"No…no don't go…," tiny beads of sweat began to sprout on her head.

_What's a chrifanfanum?_

"Don't leave me…," her voice timidly became more desperate, "Don't, please I'm not as strong without…,"

_She laughed again, and brushed back some stray hair from the boy's eyes._

_Why don't you come with me and I'll show you?_

"Please don't go…Ulrich…," My heart jerked and I stopped rubbing. Yumi's voice drifted off with the dream, leaving one last haunting cry for me to remember.

"Please…don't…go…,"

_Why aren't we taking the car, Mommy?_

_It's only a few minutes walk, sweetheart. We're only going to the botany._

_Votanny?_

Yumi's last few breaths were shallow and hollow with fear, her mouth open to amplify the effect. She was calm for two seconds before she woke up with a quiet, breathy gasp that sent a shudder running up her spine, opening her eyes quickly to the clammy reality of the boiler room. Our first reaction was bright, smudgy, pink embarrassment as Yumi first tested to sit up, noticing that my hand was on her shoulder.

Er, oops?

I swiftly yanked my hand into my lap and looked off to the side, lowly and darkly talking to her, hiding my embarrassment with "mysterious" anger.

"Go back to sleep. It's still too early to be awake," I said, focusing on a few sleeping forms on the other side of the room. Yumi sounded like she was going to retort, but simply lifted herself up enough to rest on her other side for as long as she could grasp. After a while I gave a quick glance over to see her facing the boiler, curled up within the thick folds of wool. The dim glow of the dying warmth flickered and highlighted the hair I could see and emphasized the harsh creases in the blanket. For half a second and no more, a smile twitched on my face, and I turned back to watching the other sleeping forms.

_A botany is a place where they grow flowers, Ulrich._

_Why?_

_Well, some people like flowers, or they like to buy them for other people as a present._

_The boy scrunched his nose in confusion._

_Flowers for a present?_

_She smiled as they walked._

_Ah, someday, Ulrich. When you're older, you'll understand. Someday…_

_But Mommy…_

_Hmm?_

_What's a chrifanfanum?_

_Oh dear, I thought you'd figure it out. It's a flower, with skinny petals. I personally love chrifanfanums—especially the yellow ones._

_Nuh-uhhhh! You said it wrong! It's _chrifanfanums,_not chrifanfanums!_

_The woman chuckled and took the boy's hand, swinging it in beat to their steps._

_Oh, silly me. Chrysanthemums, is that right?_

_Yes, Mum, chrifanfanums._

_Good. I'm glad you're right._

At about five forty-five Mr. Delmas woke up, taking a cup of Mrs. Meyer's coffee. He took a sip, choked back a cough that would have spit it out, nodded thanks to Mrs. Meyer, and turned away. When he thought no one was looking, he spit the coffee back into his cup. Poor Mrs. Meyer. No wonder why she teaches math instead of home economics.

Six thirty came and went with Jim gruffly waking up, and fifteen minutes later more and more students groggily awoke with strange aches, pains, and groans. After everyone was awake, Jim went upstairs to check the weather and reporting that Rosa was already cooking in the cafeteria. Quite a few people cheered after having Mrs. Meyer's cooking for a meal or two, and there was a mixed bustle of bodies pushing each other to get to the cafeteria first despite the pouring rain and thunder.

Gee, I wonder who was the leader of the pack in that race.

"Move it! Come on, I'm starving! Rosa's got bacon, egg on toast and sweet, sweet croissants for me to heal my poor forlorn creaking joints! Outta my way, lemmee through! _I need FOOD_!!" Odd screamed, forcibly shoving everyone out of the way and bursting past all faculties trying to barricade him, dashing out of the boiler room and on a one-way course to the cafeteria.

What a nutcase.

I was fairly in the back, but it didn't matter to me because I was never very hungry in the morning. Almost right as I was passing through the first door someone caught me by my upper arm and gave a short tug for me to stop. I did, and turned around.

Yumi held me fast with a firm grip. Her eyes were blazing with warning and what looked like anger. Rather shocked, I tested her grip and tried to pull away. She didn't let me budge.

By this time the teachers had left us, figuring that the two of us could navigate through heavy rains if we've outran a tornado before. It was just me and her; a complete showdown.

"You…," Yumi said dangerously, "Did I talk in my sleep?" she asked. I stared at her, green eyes to chocolate eyes, unmoving and unwavering.

"Yeah, you did," I said simply. Her eyes flashed, and long rays of electricity connected between our different irises, and the duel began.

"What did I say?" she demanded.

"I couldn't hear," I lied.

"Bull crap," she said, "What…did…I…say?"

I locked gazes and lowered my head. She didn't flinch as I answered, "You said something about leaving and going. That's all I heard, savvy?"

Yumi curled her lip and looked like she was about to punch me. She probably wanted to, but had to restrain herself. "Even more bull crap. Alright, fine, what the heck were you doing touching me?"

My eyes blazed with annoyed anger.

"I was _not_ 'touching' you. I was—,"

"It doesn't matter _where_ you were touching me," she interrupted sharply, "You had your hand on my shoulder, and I noticed my hair was pulled back. Your hand was on me. _Why?_"

I threw the arm that she held out and sideways in a rough ridge-hand, pushing her back into the wall but staying put. Proving my point with that, I gave a very sharp retort as she stomped back up to me.

"Excuse me, but I'm not the only one who eavesdrops on people who talk in their sleep, seeing as you did the same thing to me two nights ago!" I spat, putting a restraining hand on her shoulder so she couldn't come and closer. She glared at me, and snatched my hand.

"Sorry, pal, but your reaction was far from normal when you slapped me. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but I'm not ready to die yet," she scowled at me, and tugged my hand in front of her, "And these gloves, why the heck do you wear them all the time? Some sort of rebellious fashion?"

"Uhuhm, wah—," I said, trying to twist my way out of her grasp two seconds too late, seeing as she already ripped my glove off. Lucky me, it just had to be the hand with the worst burn marks and the more noticeable scars. God_damn_ my right hand!

All fire from that point on was partially extinguished as Yumi's eyes were now directed on my hand, widened and a little frightened. It was only then that she noticed the stray scar dotting my arm all the way up to underneath the lip of my jacket sleeve. Her voice came out in a whisper, like a scared little kitten.

"Whuh…these…your…your arm! Your hand! Whuh…what happened?"

My brain suddenly clicked into cretin mode.

"I can explain—," I said quickly, but then thought for a moment, "Uh…no I can't."

"H-how come I didn't notice…," she asked herself, drifting off, all the while turning my hand all around and examining it.

"B-Because…you didn't?" I said, mentally slapping myself because that was _not_ what I wanted to say. Yumi glanced up at me, as if seeing me like I was a different person. Inwardly wincing, I gave a desperate little tug, aching to pull away. Once again, Yumi didn't let me. The expression on her face suggested she wanted to guess what happened, but nothing came out of her mouth.

Thankfully our awkward moment was interrupted and I was saved by none other than Jim himself.

"Anders, Ishiyama, come on, breakfast won't be served forever!" he called from the door leading outside. Yumi was distracted for one second and I took the opportunity to snatch my hand away, grab my glove which was still in her other hand, and slip it back on so it wasn't as noticeable that I was hiding scars. Yumi gave me a strange, long look before I ducked my head in shamed embarrassment and stumble-ran out into the rain to get to Kadic's cafeteria.

Dear God.

Please don't do that _ever_ again.

_Is this a chrifanfanum?_

_Nope, not quite, that's an iris._

_Is this a chrifanfanum?_

_No, that's a lily._

_Then what's a chrifanfanum?_

_Come here, I'll show you…_

Midday came with an extended free time period because of minor fixing to do in the science area. In fact, the damage was bad enough for all afternoon classes to be cancelled. I took this quick opportunity to sneak out of Kadic into the city without an umbrella or even a rain coat.

After all, I knew where I was going to go.

_Is that…?_

_Yes, Ulrich, that's a chrysanthemum._

_I'sso big!_

_Yes, they can be. They can get even bigger!_

_As big as me?_

_Well, I don't know, you're pretty big and strong…_

_The cashier smiled to herself as the boy looked up at his mother with big puppy eyes._

_But I suppose there are some that are as big as you._

After I had found the right street, I closed my eyes and stepped forward, completely relying on my memory to take me where I needed to go. Through the rain I walked blindly, until I came upon a soaked doormat that was placed in front of a tiny shop with a rusty bell hanging just within the canvas awning's limits. I remembered when that bell used to shine in the sunlight with newly polished brass, boasting of its importance. I spent a minute staring at it, and pushed the door, ringing the bell even though it couldn't be heard over the rain, and stepped into the shop.

_The woman snatched his cheek like a granny, and he giggled and pawed at her until she stopped. She gathered a bundle of yellow ones, all healthy with slender saffron petals, and walked toward the cashier._

The smell hadn't changed much at all from what I remember, always the sweet aroma of different flowers mixing together to form one big natural perfume spray that was actually a nice scent to breathe in deeply, in and out. With the smells came so many memories flooding back that I almost staggered back out the door and into the rain.

There were three other people in the shop—the cashier, a guy who looked like he would eventually inherit this place, and two other ladies, one in her early middle ages and the other just leaving her middle age. They all curiously stared at me, sopping wet in the doorway, just wondering what in the world I was doing here on a day like this. I half-ignored them, though I did look at them back, and scanned the store looking at each bouquet painstakingly created for show and sell.

Marcus Botany. Slogan, _A rose by any other name is Marcus. _It hadn't changed one bit. Even the wine red carpet was the same from twelve years ago—only looking a mite aged since then. Ironically, it suddenly occurred to me that the slogan was a take off of a Shakespeare quote. I blinked my eyes a few times, and walked up to the guy at the counter.

_The cashier stood at the ready, asking politely._

_Five yellow chrysanthemums?_

_The woman replied, keeping watch as her boy jumped up and down, trying to see over the high counter._

_Five yellow chrysanthemums._

"Excuse me," I said quietly, "You…wouldn't happen to have five yellow chrysanthemums, would you?" The man, with short curly brown hair who appeared to be in his mid-twenties and whose name was 'Marty' stared at me for a second before replying.

"Oh, uh, yes, we have some fresh ones behind the counter here—I just haven't got around to putting them up—you said five?" he ducked underneath the counter which now barely came up to my stomach and was speaking as he was going through cupboards.

"Yeah, five yellow ones…," I confirmed, leaning over a tad to see what he was doing. Some water dripped on the counter, and I pulled back, finding a tissue box and hastily wiping it up.

_Do they has green chrifanfanums?_

_The boy tugged on his mother's dress eagerly, wondering if they had his favorite color. His mother twisted his mouth in a frown._

_No, sorry, but I don't think so. The stems are green though._

_Oh…_

_Downhearted, the boy thought for a moment._

_Do they has red ones?_

"O-Oh, and, do you happen to have a red chrysanthemum?" I suddenly asked. Marty bumped his head against the counter, gave a groan, and stood up halfway.

"What? You say a red one too?" he asked, rubbing his head ruefully.

"Yeah…," I answered softly, "Yeah, a red one too. Just one."

"Hmmm, let me check. I know we just had a large order for every red flower we could think of, but I do believe…," his voice trailed off as he disappeared into a back room.

_The woman looked at the cashier expectantly._

_Hmm, I think we have them. Just let me check here…,_

_She looked down at her boy as the cashier leafed through different tags of flowers. The boy looked back up at her with big, brilliant eyes._

_They has red ones?_

_Yes, they may have red ones._

_Yaaay!_

"Oh hooo!" Marty called from the back, "You're in luck, kid, we've got exactly three left. You say you wanted one?" He stumbled out of the room, holding three dripping blush-red chrysanthemums in his left hand. Laying them on the counter, he ducked down once more and brought out five yellow ones and laid them next to the red.

My eyes stung.

_Oop, you're in luck! Only three left! How many did you want?_

_The cashier lady returned with the flowers, bright and happy. The boy began to jump up and down with more hyper activity, eager to see the red ones. The mother smirked and placed a hand on his head, preventing him from doing that any more._

_I think just one will be fine._

_Do you want it arranged as a bouquet, ma'am?_

_Oh, I do believe that will be fine. Just the six chrysanthemums, then._

_Six chrysanthemums_…I mouthed as Marty plucked one red one out from the other two.

"Do you want it arranged as a bouquet, sir?" Marty asked me, I gave a short stare, then answered.

"Yeah…yeah that'd be great,"

"Any preference to how they should be arranged?"

_Does this look alright, ma'am?_

_The cashier held up the bouquet, all perfectly placed with the five yellow chrysanthemums circling the red one that was placed gracefully in the middle. The woman beamed, and nodded. The little boy began to complain, so she lifted him up onto the counter to look. He was immediately thrilled._

_Izzat our chrifanfanums, Mommy?_

_Yes, Ulrich, those are the chrysanthemums._

_Can we take them home and show Daddy?_

_Well, of course we will. I'm sure he'd be thrilled!_

_Frilled?_

_The cashier and the mother exchanged chuckles and nodded._

_He'd be very happy._

_The mother tussled his hair gently. The lady cashier decided to challenge the little boy and asked him a math question._

_Now, I think there are six in here, but I'm not sure—_

_I can count to ten!_

_Oh, can you? That's amazing! Would you mind counting six for me?_

_The boy put a pudgy finger out and pointed to each chrysanthemum as he counted._

_One…two…free…four…fife…feven…_

_Six, dear, six before seven._

_Six! Six chrifanfanums, right Mommy?_

_The mother grinned, and began to dig in her purse._

"Sir…?" Marty asked, bringing me back from my daydream. I shook my head, and replied as steadily as I could.

"Uh, yeah…if you could arrange it with the red in the middle and all five yellows around that one, that'd be perfect…," I said, digging into my pocket for my meager wallet. I knew I had enough for the bouquet. Flopping the damp fake leather wallet onto the counter, I sifted through the few bills I had, waiting for the charge. As he was wrapping the bouquet up in translucent creamy paper, Marty punched in the price and told me directly.

"That will be eight euros straight, please," he said. I nodded and picked out a ten and tossed them on the counter. He took them and opened the drawer as he was about to give me back my change. I took the flowers by the stems and quietly said, "Keep the change…,"

Marty gave me a strange look. I met his gaze and held it until he shrugged and closed the box. I was about to take a step back when I realized the older lady was behind me, and quickly side-stepped and avoided colliding with her.

"Dearie me, child, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in school?" she asked as she carefully placed some white lilies and a deep rose on the table. I shrugged and politely explained.

"The tornado had some damage to our science building, afternoon is cancelled,"

The lady covered a nasty cough and began picking through her purse as she replied. "But what are you doing here? I would imagine a flower shop would be the last place a high-school student wants to be…,"

I blinked, and looked down.

"Ashamed, are you?" she continued as Marty totaled her price up, "Is it for someone special?"

I looked up, but kept my head down. I heaved a sigh, "It's…nothing, really. And it's not what you think, either…,"

The lady gave me a look that was deprived of expression but flowing with hard-earned wisdom. Her thin mouth curled into a small smile, and she gave a curt nod. I bowed my head as a good-bye to her, then slowly walked to the door. The younger lady called after me and asked if I wanted an umbrella, but I shook my head and stated that it would practically be stealing. With that, I left the shop and walked straight into the pouring rain, heading toward the nearest church.

_Mommy…_

It didn't take long for a pastor to answer my booming knocks.

_Yes, dear?_

_I'm tired, Mommy…_

After a quick peck inside, I got my answers faster than hoped, and I was back outside within a flash, despite the pastor's worry.

_We're almost home, sweetheart._

_The boy gave a large yawn._

_I'm tired…_

Following straight directions, I found the place was ease. Step one was completed, now I just needed to do step two.

_Oh my, just look at that yawn. Tell you what, I'll give you a piggy back if you'll hold the flowers for me, hmm?_

Nobody was in the little office, so I had to search by myself. I concentrated on looking for the new ones.

_The boy rubbed his eye with one fist and reached up his other as his mother kneeled down. Soon he clumsily climbed onto her shoulders, grasping the bouquet in his chubby hand and resting his cheek on her head, the other hand's thumb busily being sucked on._

Interesting to say, it didn't take me long. It was plain and simple, with only a curved design on the sides. The font was just a clear times new roman in caps lock, with only a name and date put on it, and a short little epitaph beneath it stating how she died. A lump formed in my throat, and I found it incredibly hard to keep back something that I had been keeping back for far too long.

_Oh boy, you're getting so heavy! Look, there's our house, Ulrich!_

_Mmmm…_

_Ohhh, you sound really tired. Do you need a nap?_

_No, Mommy, I'm fine…_

_Look, Ulrich, Daddy's in the doorway! Go on, look!_

The rain was cold. Painfully cold and hard. My clothes were now a heavy burden, numbing my skin and not protecting me from the wind anymore. The cold gusts of wind and rain seeped down into my bones, making me forget that I had skin and muscle. I was numb all over, and my instinct screamed at me to run for shelter. Run, run away as fast as you can. You can't handle this.

It's too much.

_The boy lazily lifted his head to catch a glimpse of his father smiling and waving in the door. He had apparently just arrived home from work, and was eager to see his three year old boy. Ulrich blinked, and kept his eye on him as they approached._

Warmth burst on my cheeks as saltwater mixed with the sleet, damming up in my scar then finally flowing over, dripping down my chin. I bet you would never tell that I was crying. I bet you would never see the pain on my face, betrayed by the warm water turning cold when it brought itself into the world. The beginning of its life was warm and promising, but it turned cold and bitter near the end of its purpose. I choked, realizing that it was a hell of a lot like my life right now. I clutched the bouquet. I wanted to leave it as the only offering there was, but I didn't want to let it go, because letting it go meant that I accepted her death.

I didn't want to accept her death.

_Whoaaah, the little tyke's tired out! How did that happen, please Meria tell me your secret!_

_The young woman blushed and put a few fingers to her mouth._

_Oh my, you just need to know what it is that will excite and then bore these kids, you know…_

_So what was it?_

_The botany._

_The_botany?_ Now that's a surprise! Well, I suppose that explains the flowers, then?_

_Oh, indeed._

_The man threw his head back and laughed in merriment. Ulrich rubbed his cheek into his mother's head, trying to get a more comfortable pillow. His father roughly messed with his hair and the kid complained, taking a soggy hand out of his mouth and pawing at his dad's arm. The man laughed again._

_And Ulrich picked out the colors, too._

_Did he now? Well, he does seem to have good taste! Come inside, we'll set it up on the kitchen table._

Father.

_Meria stepped closer to the man before he turned around, looking him in his deep brown eyes. The man, Lukas, paused, returning her gaze._

Mother.

_A small kiss was shared between them before the door was unlocked, and the family was released into the household. Ulrich was set down to bed for a short nap before supper, left with two kisses—one from his mother Meria, and the other from his father Lukas._

God.

_They were the happiest they could ever be._

Where did my life go wrong?

"Enjoying the scenery, are we?"

That voice. That chilling voice. It sounded cheery, but I saw past the mask. I knew what it was. I knew who it was. I knew what it could do. I heard, I knew, I hated.

"You…," I said through gritted teeth, "What the fuck are you doing here?"

My father shrugged underneath a jet-black umbrella. "Just enjoying the scenery," he said casually, "What are _you_ doing here? Thinking of the past?"

I swear the stems of the chrysanthemums broke under my grip. My father grinned maliciously.

"Chrysanthemums." He said, "Chrysanthemums were her favorite, were they not?"

"Shut up," I growled, overtaken with anger and the animal need for revenge. My father began to whistle _Stairway to Heaven_, and took a few steps forward. I dropped my feet back in an offensive stance.

"Meria Stern…," he said carelessly, "Surviving husband and—,"

"Go away," I said, "The newscast—even _you_ said I was dead. Just go—,"

"Surviving husband and daughter," he finished. At first I was confused, thinking that he was calling me a girl. Thinking that was way too bizarre even for him, I looked at him curiously.

"…Daughter?" I whispered. My father's grin spread.

"Oh, you never knew, did you? Back about, oh, two and a half years ago; a sibling of yours was born,"

I wanted to retort, to say that he was wrong, but I was too dumbstruck to do or say anything.

"Meria was frightened of having another child, you know. She aborted the past three—,"

"Past_three_?" I choked, "Past _three?_"

Dad ignored me.

"But there was something about this one that was different to her. Don't ask me what. But she kept all business about this baby secret from her own husband. When she fell into labor in the middle of the day, she personally drove herself to the hospital instead of calling _me_. There, at which hospital I do not know, she gave birth to a younger sibling of yours. Apparently fearing from this child's 'safety', she immediately put the baby into hiding, and never told anyone—not even you."

"Y-You knew?" I stuttered. My father laughed, clearly saying in that laugh that I was an idiot.

"I was _living_ with her, unlike you. I knew of her condition."

"Th-The kid…the girl…where…,"

"Where IS she?" My father finished for me in a drunk-happy voice. The rain was silenced as he replied to me.

"Mrs. Periwinkle is an old bitch who daycares kids, sometimes even caring for those like the orphans or the homeless. She was put there for safe-keeping, and they were warned not to let me near her. I know where she is. I just decided to play along with Meria's game for a while. Periwinkle's should be close enough to Kadic, you won't be able to miss that ancient Victorian house she's got."

My jaw dropped open with my tongue lolling out. Maybe he was lying to me, but I found myself unable to believe that this was a lie. My teeth clacked as I asked him one last question.

"Name—what's her name?"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk…," My father said, waving a finger at me, "Now, I can't do that. After all, my job is to give you a backwards heaven…," With that, he turned and began to leave.

"No—wait, please!" I pleaded, falling to my knees into the mud. He didn't listen, and disappeared into the madness of the rain that finally made a return in my mind.

"My…My…," I knew the word, but I struggled to say it, "My…My sister…My sister! My sister…!"

Hot tears ran down my face even more frequently. A sister. I had a sister. A sister. My sister. My family.

My only one.

My last chrysanthemum.

* * *

WHOAH, WEREN'T EXPECTIN' THAT, WERE YA?  



	11. Backward Heaven

snerks I love the new year! It gave me a gift! SIIIICKNESS:D

Haha no.

Lalalalala Backward Heaven. Baaackward heaven. Very...very...VERY important in this story.

Thank you.

* * *

Chapter Eleven: Backward Heaven

_Angel of Mine_

I dragged myself up the stairway to the dorm, spaced out and dripping water and some mud everywhere. Eventually, after ten more minutes of sobbing on the ground, I left the bouquet to rest steadily against the plain grave. Then, slowly, painstakingly, I made my way back to Kadic Academy. The rain had washed off most of the mud, though there were still two huge stains on my shins with one or two surviving clumps of filth sticking to them.

Needless to say, I left a trail of slippery dirt as I staggered in the hallways. All of the sudden I knew that I never wanted to be a school janitor.

The door to my dorm was slightly ajar, with the noise of Odd, Yumi, and Aelita having a small get-together within. I guessed that Jeremy locked himself up in his own dorm to emphasize his feeling on the 'kissing' incident. Subdigitals boomed rather quietly from within the room, adding background music to conversation.

And yet, all of this was completely lost on me as I gave the door a push and slid into the room, dripping, melting, dragging myself over to my cot. Odd, Yumi, and Aelita all became silent, watching me stalk in, strangely curious.

I took my jacket off and let it plop into our laundry basket, slipping out of my socks and shoes and leaving them near the door. My pendant dangled just behind my shirt, threatening to show. For some reason, I didn't take my gloves off even though they were itchier than poison ivy. Instead I just sat down on my blankets, staring off into space at the floor and not taking notice to the others.

Odd was the first one to break the awkward silence.

"Reese…there you are! Everyone's been worried ever since you left! Where were you?"

Interestingly enough, when Odd said _everyone's been worried_ Yumi flinched and looked away. I do believe I was the only one who noticed too, since Aelita had twisted her back to look at me and Odd was focused on me as well.

To answer Odd's question, I said nothing.

"If we're bothering you…," Aelita piped up, "We can leave…,"

I shook my head and lowly stated that there wasn't any bother if they stayed or not. They kind of looked a bit uncomfortable, but they stayed anyways. I simply continued to stare off into Wonderland.

Kiwi crawled out from a random drawer and trotted over to me, tail leisurely wagging. For some reason I could tell that he sensed that something was wrong just by the way he looked at me. I glanced down at him as he approached, panting freely without saliva.

"Rrrrff…," He said quietly, sitting down and putting a paw up, scraping my dirty pant leg. His doggy eyes looked up at mine in some sort of sympathetic way, and I flinched, looking away. I couldn't deal with friendship at a time like that, even if it was coming from a canine.

Although it was clear I had literally crashed their party, Odd didn't seem to mind and actually was a little inviting to me, getting everyone else there into asking questions about why I had left for a while. You know, there was just some times where I wanted to wring that boy's neck.

"Reese, man, you're _soaked_. How long did you spend out in the rain there?"

I was silent for a moment more before giving in and simply replying, "Long enough…,"

Three pairs of eyes were all focused on me, one violet, one rainbow gray, and the other a deep sea of chocolate. Chocolate. Chocolate, huh? Though I wasn't making contact with her eyes, I was drowning within them. There was something different in them now; in the way she looked at me. Hatred might have still been in them, but it was only traces of it now. The chocolate was laced with troubled matters, curiosity, and some sadness. It made my heart twist abnormally.

"Where did you go…?" Aelita asked. I shook my head, and absent mindedly ruffled Kiwi's ears.

There was another patch of silence before the three of them reluctantly broke up, starting with Yumi who muttered something about being tired as she got up and walked out. Aelita looked like she wanted to stay longer, but it wasn't long after Yumi left that she followed, commenting on doing another get-together like that again sometime soon. Odd gave a smile at her as she quietly shut the door, and got up to turn the music off. Kiwi barked and ran in a circle near Odd, finally collapsing and stretching himself out on the floor. Odd chuckled and patted the dog's belly, picking him up afterwards and setting him in the sleeping drawer.

Still dripping wet, I lifted my legs onto my bed and lay down, facing the wall. Taking no notice of the use of blankets, I laid there, my knees slightly bent and my arms loosely placed out in front of me. I breathed deeply, closing my eyes and thinking of nothing but her, whatever her name was.

Through my eyelids I saw the lights being turned out, and I heard Odd get into bed, mumbling something to himself loud enough so I could here.

"There are just sometimes when I swear, Reese, I wonder if you're really alright…,"

I gave a deep sigh, and replied in a soft tone.

"Same here…,"

_Same here, good buddy,_ I repeated in my head, _Same here…_

UNIQUE: Just…like…everyone…else.

Unless you're Odd.

Foggy. That's what the days were now. Drearily foggy. During my free time on these days I actually stayed inside instead of wandering through the woods. While Odd blasted our ears out with really loud music I was leafing through countless maps and phone books, utterly desperate to find out as much as I could about this Mrs. Periwinkle before Saturday rolled around. Odd really started to think I was insane then. I gave a small smirk, and shrugged him off.

Saturday finally came, and in the morning during classes I went over the route I had plotted out. Fancily enough, the route just _happened_ to pass right in front of Yumi's house.

How fun.

Needless to say I waited for a while after she had left for the weekend before leaving Kadic myself, so as not to raise any other suspicions.

When I had embarked it was lightly misting, even though the fog was thin enough to see at least see over twenty meters. As I passed through the gates I felt something unmistakable hit the back of my head, and I held back a shudder. Please just be patient, Aelita, I swear I'll tell you. Eventually.

It took all of my power not to let my legs walk ten times faster than they were already, as antsy as I was. Breathing in the mist helped me to calm down a bit as it cleared my senses and my brain. But still, I knew there was nothing that could ever prepare me for what I was about to experience next.

My little sister.

If only I knew her name, maybe I wouldn't be so nervous. Maybe if I knew what she looked like, then I would be even calmer.

_Oh come now, you don't even recognize her? Spitting image of your mother, you know!_

My spine rippled. That Zombie Ulrich freak's face melted in front of my eyes, his grin as wide as before. So that's what that dream meant. It was trying to tell me that I had a little sister. Sure, that's great and all, but I didn't know about her until a few days ago. Why was that plunged into my dream randomly like that? Well, I don't care if the reason remained foreign to me. My head hurt, so I tried to focus on walking and nothing else.

Passing Yumi's house summoned a strange twitch in my head, but I forced myself not to look for fear of seeing somebody looking back. My green eyes became horribly interested in the passing concrete underneath my feet, and I turned my head away to avoid the Japanese presence at all costs. I don't think I could bear to stand up to her again after what happened the morning after the storm.

Dazed and vaguely hungry for some reason, I continued to monotonously put one foot in front of the other. It felt like it was only a second's pace after Yumi's house before I stood in front of a great dark maroon Victorian abode. Though it seemed rather spacey for an old lady, the reason that she housed quite a few children made all of reason forgive her.

Right on the chest-high black iron fence was a pale blue sign in fancy print delicately saying "Mrs. Periwinkle's" with great dignity. I gulped, and gently pushed open the unlocked gate. This wasn't going to be easy, one way or the other.

Finding an old, dirty brass doorbell, I pushed it to hear the soft chime within the abode. I stood in front of the door, looking to the side windows that were covered with thin white curtains for any sign of ghostly movement. After a short while, quick footsteps were heard and the door was unlocked smartly and creaked open to reveal a college-aged dirty blonde with cappuccino tan eyes. She looked like she was rather sharp and kind, and a little wary of other people. Or maybe just wary of people with giant scars on their face, whichever.

"Can I help you…?" She asked questionably. My mouth felt numb and stupid as I replied.

"Um…I'm looking for my little sister…she's about two and a half…," I said quietly.

"Name?" The girl asked. I felt like I was about to wince.

"I…don't know," I confessed. She looked at me skeptically and simply replied to that.

"Come inside onto the mat. Wait there and I'll be right back," She creaked it open wider and I tentatively stepped in, wiping my feet on the indoor rug and patiently, nervously standing there as the girl (who was holding a half-asleep toddler in one arm) disappeared into the house for a moment. I tried to calm my nerves by taking in the details of the house.

The ceiling was high and a cheap, bright mini-chandelier dangled overhead a few feet forward. Immediately to my left was a coat hanger, and just beyond that a homely little box-bench for storage and rest. The hall was a tad narrow, but wide enough for about three people to stand shoulder to shoulder to reach across comfortably. Noises were heard around the house—different toddler and young children noises. None of them were upset too badly, although it was pretty obvious that they either needed food or sleep soon. To answer my question the room was full of the sensational smell of gravy and mashed potatoes, a soothing Western-type of dinner. I contemplated that it was either lunchtime or just after, and the little ones would be needing their nap soon.

The girl came back with a short old lady dressed in a pale purple gown with little red flowers dotted all over it. She wore a white, slightly stained apron with a frilled edge. Though she was slightly bent over, the look on her gentle wrinkled face told me that she was a lot younger in personality than that. Her old and color-depleted gray eyes shone with kind mischief and wisdom, and her peppered gray-and-white hair was pulled back into a bun. She came up to just below my shoulder, and was a tad heavy but not too much.

And so I met Mrs. Periwinkle.

"Oh my dear boy, looking for someone, are you?" she said to me in a strong, aged voice. Turning to the girl and waving her hand, she quickly asked, "Grab my spectacles, will you Miss? I must see this boy better," The girl gave a tight smile and a nod, then disappeared for two seconds to return with a pair of half-moon glasses which Mrs. Periwinkle placed on her curved nose.

"Now then, who was it you were looking for?" she asked. I replied in a louder voice than I had to the girl, basically, in a normal talking voice, hoping the old lady could hear.

"My sister…," I said, "She's about two and a half…and I think she's lived her entire life with you…,"

Mrs. Periwinkle didn't say anything, but slowly _shffed_ forward in her thin slippers, studying my features. The girl was looking at me intently, still wondering if I could be completely trusted or not. She gave the toddler she was holding a little jog to readjust her grip, and the kid burped. A smile flashed across her face before Mrs. Periwinkle spoke again.

"Hmm, that's a mighty scar you have there, boy. How was it that a nice young man like you got that?"

"Umm," I said uncertainly, "Moment's chance, I guess…I think I was trying to help a friend of mine when I got scratched,"

Mrs. Periwinkle made no comment or gesture as she continued to take in my face in detail. The girl quickly excused herself to go check up on the other kids with a short nod from Mrs. Periwinkle. After she left, Mrs. Periwinkle finally spoke what was on her mind.

"You have the loveliest eyes, has anyone ever told you that…?" she said gently. I blinked, wondering if she was onto something.

"Yeah…maybe, once or twice," A smile stretched across the old woman's features as she continued.

"God rest her troubled soul, you must be Meria Stern's boy, aren't you?"

My body went rigid as my tongue uttered nothing but pure undisturbed silence. I could do nothing in return than to meet her gaze in utter pleading. She got the message pretty quick as the thin smile became warmer.

"Don't worry, I won't tell. I assume your life is troublesome enough already." She confirmed, calming only a small fraction of my nerves. Mrs. Periwinkle turned behind her and called out for the girl.

"Sarah! Would you be as kind as to bring little Nevaeh out?" she shouted rather loudly for someone her age. From inside the house the college girl called out an 'alright' and it wasn't long before she reappeared with a different toddler in her arms. Mrs. Periwinkle turned back to me with a knowing look, and stepped to the side.

Sarah set the small girl down on the floor. She looked at me with the brightest of eyes, pure lime-emerald green, just like mine, just like our mother. Her russet hair fell down to about mid-back, which is pretty long for a toddler. Her cheeks were chubby and her nose was that of a button. She looked at me rather curiously, but didn't want to advance forward. Her limbs were somewhat stubby with small fingers, already growing up into a small child. All in all, when I looked at that face of hers I could think of no one else but a very young version of my mother. My eyes began to sting the more I looked at her.

"You said her name was…?" I asked very quietly, my voice on the verge of cracking. Mrs. Periwinkle supplied me with an answer and a reason.

"Nevaeh. If you understand, the name 'Nevaeh' is simply 'heaven' spelled backwards."

Nevaeh. A backwards heaven. My father literally gave me an obvious clue to her name, and I completely missed it. I blinked back my emotions multiple times as I stared at her, completely bewildered for no reason at all.

"Any middle name…?" I asked softly. To my surprise, Mrs. Periwinkle shook her head.

"Why no…! No, Meria decided that it should be up to someone else to give the middle name to her. Someone…like you," She said slyly. I wavered.

Nevaeh tugged on Sarah's pant leg, and Sarah crouched down as Nevaeh asked her a question into her ear. Sarah smiled and answered loud enough so we could hear.

"Well from what I hear, I think that's your big brother! You know all the other kids that talk about their big brothers right? Weren't you the one that wanted one too?"

Nevaeh stared at Sarah for a bit, emotionless. That's when she let go of the pant leg and looked straight at me. For her, the ice was as good as broken. For her, opening up to people was a lot easier, at least at this age. For her, I guess I seemed like a wish come true.

The little girl walked up to me slowly, each step echoing in my ears. As she approached, I crouched down to a catcher's position, never breaking eye contact with her. We were centimeters away when she stopped, staring directly at me. That's the exact moment when I heard her voice for the first time.

"Bruggers givin' hugs, don't thay?" she asked. My heart twisted when I heard the use of the word 'brugger' and was once again reminded of my insane dreams. I gave a small smile at her.

"Yes, yeah I would think so…,"

Another moment of silence lasted for about five more seconds before Nevaeh closed the gap between us and threw her short arms around my neck. The side of her forehead pressed against my chin. Although stiff and unsure at first, I wrapped my arms around her back, pulling her just a little closer. I could feel her happiness seep through her in the tender hug.

I never knew little kids could be so warm.

TECHNICAL: Hey, nobody likes a literalist.

Unless you ARE a literalist, just like Jeremy.

I politely refused lunch as I had already eaten at Kadic, and simply acted as a cushion for Nevaeh as she ate her food. Most of the other kids were being shooed off to bed by Sarah, and Mrs. Periwinkle requested that she and I had a little talk. Nevaeh didn't have any intentions of leaving any time soon, so she simply stayed on my lap while Mrs. Periwinkle started our conversation.

"Are you partial to tea?" she asked. I told her that just a cup would be fine as she put on the pot. She then reached down to open the oven which was keeping a batch of chocolate chip cookies warm.

"One cookie or two?"

"Uhh—," I began before I was interrupted by Nevaeh.

"I wanna cookie!!"

I could hear Mrs. Periwinkle softly chuckle as she picked out two perfect cookies and set them on a tea plate. She placed the plate in front of us and Nevaeh grabbed one, beginning to nibble on it greedily. Mrs. Periwinkle tut-tutted and explained that everyone loved her cookies a little too much. I took a pinch of the other one and popped it into my mouth, and I have to say that her cookies were probably the best I've ever had in the world. The dough was creamy with just the right about of sugar and maybe a hint of nutmeg or cinnamon and the chocolate, although it was almost already melted, melted even more in your mouth deliciously. I don't think I'll have a different brand of cookie ever again. This delicacy was gone before Odd could sniff it out from Kadic Academy.

After the tea was ready (some sort of mint) Mrs. Periwinkle sat down kitty corner to where Nevaeh and I were. There was a short period of silence, before the real talk started.

"I wondered if you were going to come…," she started, leisurely stirring her tea. I put down my mug and answered.

"Really? Honestly, I didn't even know I had a sister until a few days ago…," I said truthfully. Mrs. Periwinkle became absent-minded as she recalled what happened. I was thoroughly amazed at her memory. For a woman in her early seventies, this was really good.

"Meria contemplated whether or not to tell you. It's apparent that she decided not to…,"

Nevaeh shifted her position so her head rested on my collarbone. Suddenly tired, she began to chew on the other half of her cookie with less gusto and more relaxation. I rubbed her shoulder warmly as Mrs. Periwinkle continued after I asked her why.

"Well…Your mother was very scared. The first thing she told me was to make sure that her husband, Lukas Stern, was not to get close to Nevaeh, _ever_,"

I can believe that.

"And the second thing she told me was that if her son ever came looking for her that I should show him to her. She had complete faith in you to be a good brother to your little sister. For some reason she almost foresaw that she wouldn't be able to see her daughter again in her lifetime."

The information soaked into me like a sponge as she talked. Crumbles from Nevaeh's cookie tumbled down my shirt, some of them even getting underneath my shirt. I ignored them as silence separated us for a moment. Mrs. Periwinkle sighed and put down her cup, rubbing her hands together like a massage. That's when she began to tell me the tiny details of the story.

The day Nevaeh was born, after all the hospital shenanigans and papers and stuff, my mother personally drove her baby girl over to Mrs. Periwinkle's, whom was a gold star in the eyes of a good family friend. She had little time to explain her situation, but got through enough of the story to get them to understand that she was totally unable to safely take care of her baby. My mother told them my sister's name, and also to look out for me, Ulrich. She also mentioned that she didn't know what the future held in store for her and her son, but she could tell that it couldn't get any better than it was with the alcohol binge my father had been on recently. Handing a school picture of me to Mrs. Periwinkle, my mother bade her a sad yet hopeful farewell, and gave her daughter the only kiss she would ever receive from her mother before stumbling out to her car to drive back home.

The next time they would ever hear of Meria Stern would be on the late evening news on the murder report that wasn't too long ago.

After seeing this Mrs. Periwinkle worried over Nevaeh and my suspected "death." She was probably one of the only other people that didn't trust my father when he appeared on national television. It was here in this story that she finally said that my father had visited here once.

My spine stiffened and I quickly asked what he wanted. Mrs. Periwinkle shook her head, and simply explained that he was there looking for Nevaeh Stern. Already that sent an alarm off in her head since only the people living in her house and Meria knew about Nevaeh, so she only let him get as far as the rug in the hallway. She began to ask him questions about his name, to which he didn't answer. Eventually she just shooed him out the door, but not without figuring out his back story beforehand. Evidently he had found out the information from my mother (probably tortured it right out of the poor woman) and had come down to try and weasel his way in to bring little Nevaeh home. The whole incident occurred about eight months ago, give or take.

To tie up her story, she said was only a bit surprised by me showing up at the doorstep. She figured that if Meria had put as much faith into me as she did, that she should too. There were only a few questions coming from her, but I knew there were a million questions burning inside me to contradict that. I kept quiet on that part and only answered _her_ questions.

"It just makes me wonder, if you're alive, then who was that poor boy in the river and if you were involved in Meria's death or not…," she said thoughtfully. A lump formed in my throat, and I clutched Nevaeh's shoulder a little tighter than before.

"I don't know who that boy was," I confessed, "but I do know the only thing I ever did in involving the murder was being the first one to find her body. For some reason I couldn't tell anyone, nor could I think straight…," My voice drifted to a softer, darker level as I finished.

"There was so much…blood…I couldn't believe…anything,"

Mrs. Periwinkle gave me a sad, sympathetic stare, somehow feeling the truth in my words, "What's going on with you now?"

I heaved a breath of preparation and told my part of the story, everything. I told her more than I told Aelita, even though she was a near-stranger. I started with leaving my friends at Kadic and followed through with everything (editing the Xana of course) I told her of my father's abuse, Aelita's counseling, my troubles with Yumi (edited), what had happened to my friends when I was gone, but most importantly I kept pressuring that I was under a strict alias. Mrs. Periwinkle stared gravely into her near-empty cup, taking everything in.

"So…you're Reese Anders, is that it now?" she confirmed. I nodded.

"I can't let anyone else know who I am. I know my father's out there and probably looking for me. He found me at Mom's grave a few days ago and that's how I wound up here, but I don't know if he knows where I'm living, though some sick gut feeling tells me he knows where I am,"

Mrs. Periwinkle set her cup down, "Well, the bad thing about gut feelings is that they're usually true. I guess the only exceptions are the gut feelings of butterflies being mistaken for bad feelings. When my husband was still alive he took me skydiving. I thought it was a bad idea at first, but nothing terrible happened, and it was actually quite thrilling…,"

Somehow that little statement worked a smile on my face, making her smile in return. Nevaeh gave a tired groan, her cookie having been eaten from the beginning of our talk. She caught a few winks of sleep sitting on me—actually, she slept almost the entire time, and yet she still seemed like she needed more. I rubbed her shoulder once again, urging her to catch all the minutes of sleep she needed. It wasn't long before she fell back into slumber again.

Any conversation made after that was simply small talk. Mrs. Periwinkle told me that she was Sarah's great aunt and that Sarah has always had an interest in little children and is taking classes in college for a job that involves working with them. I got into more depth about my friend's personalities (she was, _ahem_, especially interested in Yumi. Even though I never mentioned I had a crush on her, some creepy sixth sense must've told her that I did) making her laugh when I explained Odd and making her eyes shine with interest when I was describing Jeremy and Aelita. After a while, the toddler's nap time was over and Sarah had reappeared from her hallway duties to start watching over the kids as they climbed down from a staircase that led upstairs to the bedrooms. Nevaeh woke up once again, although not as pleased as before when she learned that it was about time for me to go.

"I doan want you to go…," she whined, burying her face in my neck. I tried to comfort her in saying that I'd be back as soon as possible. Mrs. Periwinkle watched as I tried to reason with an unreasonable age-group, and after a while she spoke an idea that had popped in her mind.

"You know, whenever you have time and if Kadic would allow it, you could come and pick Nevaeh up and she could spend the weekend with you at the dorms sometime. I'm sure she'd love that." She offered. I looked at her quizzically.

"I'm not sure if I could do that, but if I can I'll definitely look into it. You've got enough children on your hands anyways…," I replied. Mrs. Periwinkle dismissed my last sentence with a wave of her hand.

"Poppycock! Most of these children are daycare only anyways! You go off back to your dorm, and I'll be damned if they won't let you bring your little sister over for two days out of a week! If they refuse, tell them to call me! My number is easy enough to find. Don't worry; I'll turn them around faster than a mule can kick!"

And I believed she could, too.

Nevaeh looked mighty disappointed and tired when I was at the front door, rubbing her sleepy eyes and still complaining about my leave.

"I'll be back tomorrow, Nevaeh, don't worry," I soothed. Nevaeh shook her weary head.

"Doan want you to leave, though…,"

Ohhhh. This is getting sappy.

"I like havin' a brugger…,"

I kneeled down to her level and smiled, "And I like having a sister…," I said, pulling her into a bear hug.

_I like having a sister more than you'll ever know…_I continued in my head as I shut the door behind me.

Maybe, just maybe, I had an escape from my paranoia and my troubles. As long as Nevaeh remains untouched, I could be unstoppable.

FIERY: Fueled by the strong emotions that fuel the fire, yet can still be a gentle candle.

Only Yumi has enough fire in her spirit.

Sunday came and went with me spending most of my day at Periwinkle's with Nevaeh. Faster than I would've thought possible a strong bond was formed between me and her, like a kitten to an older cat, a blind man to his seeing-eye dog, like a princess and her protector.

Like a sister to a brother.

When I came back to Kadic Odd finally asked me where I had been the past two days. To throw in an element of pure surprise, I smiled at him and simply said that I was 'hanging out' with a new friend. Odd stared at me in shock when I smiled, and sat in the corner of his bed until it was time to go to sleep.

Monday's free time was rather interesting. Odd had dragged me out into the woods to 'study' with him and the rest of his 'study group.' Turns out he just wanted me there for the sake of me being there.

Jeremy, Yumi, Odd and Aelita (whom I haven't told about Nevaeh yet) were all sitting in a rough circle around a small enclosed clearing, some doing actual work but at a relaxed pace. Even with me there and my book (I usually read Stephen King or something else dealing with other-worldly things) the atmosphere was calm and rather joyful. Small talk was shared in between the group, and Jeremy cleverly put in a well-disguised comment about Xana, saying that "the times haven't been stressful with the computers, either." Odd gave him a wink and cleanly stated that he liked technology too much. Too bad only one of them knew that I caught on and understood what they were talking about.

However, this peaceful gathering wouldn't last much longer.

Jeremy had made that comment about the super computer being quite for the past few weeks. Aelita has been expressing her worry over Xana cooking up something big, and I could even tell Odd and Yumi were tense whenever something electronic didn't work right. Xana had almost been _too_ quiet, and most predicted that it was the calm before the storm.

The calm had passed, the storm has now come.

Near the end of free time we were interrupted by one hell of a rude awakening, more for me than for anyone else. Why?

Because right out of the middle of the forest stepped in a slightly taller, slightly more teenaged, and slightly _perfect_ replica of what could've been _Ulrich__Stern_had he not have been abused by his father.

Xana just walked in and crashed the party with a perfect, _and I mean perfect_, Ulrich clone. No symbols blazed in his perfect green eyes, and no metallic voice betrayed his true identity. Xana had really outdone himself with this one. After all, if even _Jeremy_ who has known me the longest out of any one looked up in pure shock, something was definitely a little too perfect.

"U-Ulrich…? I thought you were dead!" Jeremy stuttered. Coolly, Xana replied without any hesitation.

"Dead? Oh, you mean the newscast? Must've been some other guy, definitely not me though. I mean, everyone has a twin out there, right?"

Odd squealed. Yumi gaped and…blushed? Jeremy put his laptop immediately away much to my dismay. Aelita looked confused and untrustworthy. I just hid my nose in my book so no one could see how sick I looked.

Xana, you really _have_ outdone yourself with this one…

* * *

Before you start yelling at me for throwing yet ANOTHER "curveball" your way, let me explain.

This "perfect xana clone" thing has been around ever since this story _began_ waaaay back in my head a year and a half ago, before I began to write it down. The sister thing only started after I began to write this.

And I'm truly sorry if your absolutely going INSANE from the amount of curveballs, but just, you know, there can't be a good story without curveballs.

And there can't be a good curveball unless it's at the end of a chapter. :)

By the way, I bet you think Reese is my favorite character. I bet you really think that. _WRONG._ Dude, Mrs. Periwinkle is just awesome. There's no denying that. Mrs. Periwinkle rocks!

mmkay, I think I'm done here. I hope. Mmmmyep. (OMG Jhonen Vasquez favorite expression at last second! Someone eat a undead baby smothered in tartar sauce!!!!!) (PS. The Undead Baby Smothered in Tartar sauce is an internal thing between me and a few friends. Don't expect to be found if you are lost)


	12. Vertigo Loss

Hello here, I listened to Hairspray during the end of this chapter, and during the main "meat" of this chapter...

I watched Silent Hill.

Why yes, I am a tad insane.

* * *

**Chapter Twelve: Vertigo Loss**

_What have you done now?_

_All this had led to Summer's conclusions and theories about the Jaunt; and that, of course, led back to Patty's persistent question about the mice…_

You have no idea how many times I had to read that sentence before it finally stuck in my head. Five? Six? Twenty? My mind was all in a hellish blur of confusion, anger, and for some reason betrayal. I jealously listened to the intense, stunned, breathless conversation that sprouted only seconds after the Ulrich clone had shown up.

"Are you okay? Those reports were nasty!" this came from Yumi

"I told you guys already, that _wasn't_ me. That one guy must've had my exact name. There's no way it could've been me." –clone.

"Well, where've you been? Everyone's been itching to talk to you—we couldn't reach you by phone!" –Odd

The clone gave a skeptical swish of his hand while he dug into his pocket, "That's because I got a _new_ one. I seriously would've called you guys, but the reason why I got a new one was because the memory in my old one got erased through some sort of virus. Sorry,"

_Sorry is goddamn right…_I retorted in my head, _I erased and blocked those numbers by my own damn will, and for much better reason than yours!_

Hell yes, I was angry.

"How have you been?" Jeremy asked as he stood up. My grip on the book became tighter and tighter and tighter, and soon I feared I would crumple it all to dust. Xana screwed his mouth as he answered blatantly…and faultlessly.

"Alright…so-so…It wasn't the same at the public school. I couldn't stop thinking about you guys and Lyoko, honestly enough."

Odd piped up squeakily from his excitement, "But hey, you at least got_two_days to sleep in, instead of only _one_ here!"

Chuckles and laughter were shared all around, even Aelita laughed…nervously. Swift eye contact connected between us, and I could hear her stomach churn sickly with realization. But there was no stopping Xana now.

The clone's face became grim and slightly shadowed as he continued darkly.

"Hey guys, I know it may sound weird, but you can't let on that I'm here. Just leave me be for a bit, I'll be fine. It's just that, with this newscast and all I don't want a whole commotion going on at Kadic with even more confusion. Wait until my parents contact Mr. Delmas, alright?"

Though Jeremy looked a bit worried about this, (not to mention Aelita's failed hidden expression) Odd jumped right in without thinking twice, willing to do anything for his 'good buddy.'

"Hey, it's no problemo, right? We gotchya covered, old buddy!" he said, leaping around like he was a cat or something. Oh wait…

The clone lit up with both happiness (sickly) and with a touch of anger.

"_Old_? Who are _you_ calling old?! Just look at you! Metal face! Porcupine! Odd!"

Holy God, he had more charm than I could ever accumulate in weeks! With one statement, he had all five of them laughing—and only one of the five was laughing quietly. The sixth one, however, had officially lost his place on the page from paying attention to the clone so much even though he was staring at it the entire time.

Now I'm ticked even more.

The clone suddenly got a slightly nervous expression on, and glanced at Yumi. My eyes were suddenly fixated onto her over the top of my book, a growl circulating around in my chest, waiting to be released.

"Uh, Yumi…," he began, shifting his feet, "Is there still time to talk…?"

Shocked, Yumi blinked multiple times as she sputtered out a high-pitched reply, as if her brain was floating around elsewhere in Wonderland—namely, probably with the clone. Probably.

"U-Uhh…I think so…um…there's still…fifteen, ten minutes left…right Aelita?"

Aelita jerked as if she was ripped from her thoughts, and looked around frantically for a bit before she got the question, and fumbled for a clear view of her watch. She replied kind of quietly, trying not to sound like she was suspicious of this new Ulrich, "Um, y-yes, yes there's about…just over ten minutes left. Why?"

Just over ten minutes. Goddamn. If that clone was going to do what I was thinking of in my head, I had next to no time at all. Swiftly I closed my book, giving out a hushed curse and opened it again, flipping through the pages until I found the page I was on, and put the book mark in. Closing it again, I stood up, stumbled a bit from my sleeping foot, and staggered off in the direction of Kadic Academy.

Or, what _looked_like the direction of Kadic.

Trying not to be too clumsy, I doubled back and around into the undergrowth, off of the beaten path and back around until I was in hearing range of the group. I hid behind a tree, suddenly wishing that they had leaves to better hide behind. It just meant I had to be extra careful.

"Oh him…?" Odd said, as if answering a question, "He's a new guy, only been here for a month or so. He's my new room mate. His name's Reese, and that's one of the only things he's ever said to me after he came. Kind of a…keep-to-yourself type,"

"Oh…," The clone said, sounding a bit distant, "that means I'll actually have a room to myself now? Huge score!"

Laughter was, once again, shared with the group, ending with a choked gasp from Yumi as the clone hurried up.

"Hey Yumi…you wanna take a walk?"

Autumn may be cold, but I was burning so hot I was boiling behind that tree. I needed ice.

_Now_.

Following behind them at a far distance, I followed the 'couple' as they took a leisurely paced walk through the woods. Not a lot of important words were exchanged between them—mostly, if all, was small talk. And yet I could tell that Xana was building up a tidal wave of a plan by just talking with Yumi.

Not just any Yumi. _This_ Yumi. _Their_ Yumi. _Our_ Yumi. She's not my Yumi, but she might as well be mine at this moment, because this was going to take a drastic turn for the worse, and unprepared for it, something just might happen that could drastically change the group if…

If I, who was one of the only ones who knew the truth, didn't stop that from happening. Forget about Aelita. They would be worried if she left after them. She wouldn't be able to come. I had to do this by myself.

Alone, and doing it for someone who already thinks I'm dead-insane. I can say it now, this won't be the easiest thing I had ever done in my life.

After a few minutes of nothing but tracking and waiting, the clone finally came to his conclusion at the top of the cliff—the top of the rock face I had bombarded my own knuckles into. A fall from that cliff could be quite devastating, I grimly noted.

"You know I…," Xana started, staring off into the distance, "I missed you…,"

Yumi couldn't take his eyes off of him as she replied, "I—we missed you too…," she took in a breath before continuing, "a lot…,"

"Was it hard? F-Fighting Xana, I mean…," Xana himself corrected. Yumi shifted and looked down as she answered him lowly.

"It was…in more ways than just physically fighting too…," she said. I cringed, because from the tone of her voice I could tell she was painfully telling the truth. Already in my head a chorus of cuss words was starting up, all overlapping in the strangest and most melodic of ways.

Urk.

"What do you mean?" the clone innocently asked. Yumi pulled back a lock of her hair—a true sign that she was utterly nervous beyond recognition. Pulling a rabbit out of a hat, Yumi tried to leave.

"It'll take a few minutes to get back to Kadic—maybe we should go…,"

"But Yu-Yumi wait!" The clone pleaded. Yumi paused and stared at him as he explained his situation.

"I don't know exactly when I'll be coming back to Kadic, but you have to agree that once I do I won't be left alone. This…this is really the only time we can talk before we won't have that much of a chance anymore,"

Yeesh, that was smooth. This was supposed to be _me?_ Fat chance of that!

Yumi dipped her chin and gaze, lost in thought about what he was saying. Two or three seconds, and she looked up. I began to get panicky. I didn't have a lot of time left.

"Alright," she said, "Talk, then."

I could touch Xana's triumph from where I was standing. It made me sick.

"Yumi…I-I…,"

Bile clogged my throat.

"I guess I…,"

Fingers dug into rough bark.

"I love…,"

I was ready to get this over with, no matter how un-planned it was.

"…you,"

Freezing air. It felt very cold to me now. Way too cold as Yumi's eyes went wide and her mouth moved up and down with shock.

Freezing…cold…red cheeked, red hot…

Anger.

"Like_hell_." I spat as I finally stepped out from my hiding place. Both of them snapped and turned my way. Yumi was the first to react.

"R-Reese!" she said, rather—

"Surprise…," I growled darkly, never taking my gaze off of Xana. That clone…for a split second that Yumi wasn't paying attention to him, his eyes and mine met. And within that short soul gaze, I inwardly trembled in freakish despair.

He knew. He knew _exactly_ who I was. And _that's_ why he was doing this. He was toying with me; boldly speaking that I was his little puppet as far as identity goes. Even if this attack failed in visual ways, he would have his victory over me. Xana…you anger the hell out of me.

"Excuse me? Did I do something wrong?" The clone asked, and although he wasn't smiling, I could feel the degrading stamp of an evil smirk lay down upon me from him. I flashed him the nastiest glare I could muster as Yumi gave me a very cold-hearted speech.

"Reese, you are by far the most complicated, rude and idiotic person I've met in my life. If you don't mind, I've known this boy for three years—I believe I know what I'm getting into—,"

"Like hell you do," I repeated, taking a few steps forward. Yumi's face flared up with all the old angers that I missed seeing so much within a girl's features. I would've been quite insulted if I didn't know what was really going on here.

"Like hell _you_ do!" she retorted sharply, "I've never seen a boy so…so_jealous_ of someone else, when they've only known the girl for a month! If you don't get this now I'm going to pound it upside your head so you do: Ulrich Stern is my friend, and I've known him—and like him—far more than you with me. Get over it, Mr. Anders, I'm not yours."

"Suit yourself," I growled, "Don't say I didn't warn you, though. I don't think you should trust him—_at all_."

"What you just said went in one ear and out the other," Yumi seethed. The clone acted as a piggy caught in the middle, and said nothing.

"But I bet it left a remnant or two somewhere in your head!" I said, flashing my eyes to the clone while shoving Yumi out of hearing range, "I'm warning _you_ as well. Don't lay a hand on her…," I whispered dangerously. The clone raised one eyebrow as he replied in a normal talking voice that Yumi could very well hear.

"Dude, just let it go, will ya? As I recall you were stumbling off back to Kadic," He said, pushing me aside back to where I had arrived. I released a scowl, but Yumi got in my way.

Her eyes were ablaze with the fire that had been missing nights before as she stood in between me and Xana, guarding the clone with excessive fierceness. Yes, this was the real Yumi—the one I had carried awkwardly on my back while dodging metal spears of destruction, the one I had helped through her parent's fight, the one whose first action toward me was to kick my face flat to the gym floor, bruising it for the first time out of many more to come.

And she was protecting our sworn enemy.

I clenched and unclenched my fists. Somehow I just had to prove that Ulrich was actually Xana. I could never willingly surrender Yumi to a kind of danger like that. But the only way I could've proved that Ulrich was really a clone…would be to toss my alias aside and expose Yumi to the danger of my father.

Lose-lose situation. Hand her over to Xana or to my father. I couldn't do either, and yet the clock was ticking. I could feel Xana's victorious grin mottle my spirit as each second passed, and finally I gave in.

I took one look at Yumi, saying something closely to what I had said before.

"Don't trust him,"

Yumi narrowed her eyes.

"Get lost."

My upper lip twitched, seeing Xana's overwhelming smirk behind Yumi stretch up his cheeks. I gave in. I gave in.

I turned around, and gave in, walking away.

"Forget about him," Xana cooed, as Yumi pulled back.

"I can't believe that…," Yumi began with fiery anger. Xana shushed her, and it sounded like he pulled her close from the uttered gasp that Yumi gave. I flinched, remembering the time I had hugged her getting the sling around her arm.

I reached the beginning of the woods, not more than six meters away from Yumi and Xana. Feeling an unbearable twinge at the back of my neck, I slowly turned my head to look back one last time, forlornly.

My eyes locked fast in detestation as the scene folded out in slow motion. Yumi's eyes closed, her chin in Xana's fingers and tilted toward his face, and Xana, eyes open in hunger and triumph, leaning farther and farther in. His perfectly copied green eyes flashed and molded into a bright red color, a black Xana symbol buzzing within them. Black specter traces appeared on his exposed skin, snaking eagerly toward Yumi.

Never in a million years, Xana.

Only a few sprinting strides to cover the distance, and Xana was shoved back away from Yumi towards the edge of the cliff from the force of my punch to his cheek. Yeah, poor Yumi whatever. She just stayed where she was as the clone was pushed away from her, a meter from the cliff edge. Opening her eyes in shock, she said only one word.

"R-Reese!"

"I thought I told you…," I snarled the darkest I had ever growled, "Don't lay a hand on her,"

Xana opened his mouth to reveal a long pointed tongue peeking out from his teeth and hissed loudly and angrily at me, despite the smile on his face. He reared back his hand in a delayed counter punch, but I wasn't as rusty as he suspected. Twisting my body to one side I leaped, arm outstretched, toward the phony Ulrich. Blinded by my anger, it all came too late to me what my instinct was doing.

All I was thinking was of the best way to get rid of a pest like Xana, and apparently my instinct reacted faster than I could counter-think.

I guess I really am a teenager.

A sharp, high-pitched gasp was my wake up call that came seconds too late. I saw a trace of fear in Xana's eyes as we flew in slow motion over the edge of the cliff. My hand disconnected from his chest as he fell down. My feet kicked in the air as I did a half-flip, catching a moment's glimpse of Yumi's dark eyes, wide in stupefaction. Gravity suddenly gave what seemed like a harsh pull, and I was a goner from her sight.

Anyone still wondering on why I am petrified of heights?

A scream played around the edges of my lips, and every limb in my body began to flail desperately for solid ground. Thank the God that I was close to the cliff. One of my arms smacked against a fairly good-sized inset cliff in the face, and my hand dug onto it without thinking. My shoulder yelped as my entire weight suddenly snapped to its attention. Through gritted teeth my scream finally came out in pain and I shut my eyes in fright. Sightlessly I threw my other arm up and grasped a hold for the sake of my shoulder. As soon as I did, a sickening thud came from below, and my eyes shot open, staring at the rock.

"R-Reese…!" Yumi called from above, her head visible with hair falling down the sides of her face. I gave a quick glance up to see that she was seeing just past me, and reluctantly looked down.

Xana lay crumpled on the ground, seemingly kilometers below. His red eyes blazed in a fierce glare at Yumi, then his image began to ripple. I didn't wait to see him disappear, because with that little glance came _instant pure regret_ with the _overwhelming dizziness _of looking _down from an unnatural hellish height_.

Slamming my eyelids shut, I pressed my sweaty forehead to the rock, panting heavily. That chorus of multiple cuss words returned in my head, louder than before. Finding some sense in my head, I scraped my feet along, looking for a good place to put my weight on. I found something that was barely adequate, but it was good just to feel something underneath my toes. Taking in a huge breath, I raised my eyes to Yumi's call once again.

"R…Hey Reese…Reese!"

I didn't reply, just kept my eyes locked on her and nothing else.

"Can you climb up…?"

I risked a few glances upward to the rock, figuring that maybe—just maybe—I could make it. Pulling all of my weight up like a life-or-death pull-up, I reached up with one hand and grabbed the next most convenient handhold ridge, using the previous one for my feet. It wasn't perfect, but it was okay.

With my other hand, I began to reach up for the next handhold, convincing myself it wasn't as hard as it seemed.

Suddenly the ledge underneath my feet gave way, and I was holding on for dear life with my hands once again.

Yumi gave a short gasp and immediately asked if I was alright.

"Guhgg…," was my all-intelligent answer.

Thankfully for my phobia, the going wasn't as hard as that the rest of the way. The cliff got rockier and easier the farther up, and since I was about only halfway down anyway it wasn't initially that far of a climb. That didn't stop my hands from getting damper than a fish, and if it wasn't for my gloves I would've definitely fallen from the slippery trait of my palms. Any time I had ground underneath my feet, my knees began to shake and tremble from the anxiety that rocked my body. And yet, I still got all the way up.

Near the top Yumi reached down her hand to help me up. As much as I wanted to grasp it, I ignored it and clambered up right next to her like a scrambling madman, laying myself down on the ground so I faced the sky, breathing roughly. I could feel her eyes riveted on me, but I kept my eyes closed as I recovered from my vertigo condition.

"Reese…,"

She uttered a few sounds like she was going to say something else, but in mid-speech she decided to ask something else.

"You saw something…unusual a-about that boy…didn't you?"

I coughed and sat up, scooting away from the edge of the cliff, lowly stating my answer to that.

"Don't tell about 'Macbeth' and my hand…," I bargained, "and nothing comes out of these lips."

Yumi gave a stare. I already figured that she agreed to the deal, but I waited for her to confirm it vocally.

"All…alright then, it makes a deal,"

Without giving her another look, I stood up and walked back to the woods. As I entered, I called over my shoulder.

"We're late for class,"

Yumi gave a jump, then scuttle to a stand, sprinting into the woods with me back to Kadic so as not to miss any more of school.

DANCER: Happiness! Everybody get down, footloose!

Kick off those yellow shoes!

"Is he gone?"

Aelita paced worriedly in front of me near the aspen tree, chewing on a nail. When I told her that he had disappeared, but may still be out there, it only gave her a tad bit more of relaxation. I watched her for another five minutes before she heaved a sigh to calm her down.

Cold sunset blazed on the horizon as gray clouds slowly rolled in. The first, late snow of the season was scheduled for tonight and tomorrow, light but plentiful flurries to blanket the area with three inches of fluff. I never really liked winter that much, but I really did like how much the snow was perfect for daydreaming in class.

"Reese…," Aelita said, calling me by my alias to be safe, "Why were you gone for so long?"

To Aelita's surprise, a small grin was plastered on my face, and I sat down in the tree's roots, and began to explain the complexity of my little sister to her. She was surprised at first, but then let out lots of laughter as I told her everything that had happened when we had played and such.

"Ul—Reese, you're so lucky!" she exclaimed after I had finished, "To have a baby sister like that, and in a time like…,"

"Hey," I interrupted, "Don't forget my friend, now,"

Aelita turned a light shade of pink and giggled.

"Oh come now…I'm not really doing anything—,"

"Au contraire," I countered, "You're doing way more than I could've hoped."

There was a short, fluffy silence between us as we stared at each other—lime eyes to gray diamond rainbows. Then, disaster struck!

Disaster struck with the first snowflake billowing down and landing squarely on Aelita's nose.

The cold chill melted away with the snowflake as we shared a few moments of sheer laughter with each other, enjoying the nervously short peace while we could.

At least I knew that Aelita went to bed happy that night. Because when I crawled into my cot polar opposite thoughts from that evening were prancing through my head, worrying me even more.

I was so close to telling Yumi who I was. I was so close that in fact, if I didn't have a strong willpower, I would've screamed it out to the world tomorrow morning I was that close. I nearly slipped and gave Yumi up to my father, and I _did_ slip and gave her up to Xana. Though it was a close rescue and I succeeded, it would haunt in my memory forever that _I gave up _Yumi to the sworn evil of the world. What the hell made me do that? All it did in the end was that it us showed us that I could do it again.

And by _us_I mean me and Xana.

I shivered underneath my warm blankets. I had a feeling that next time I wouldn't be so lucky.

Kiwi settled into the crook of my legs, giving a quiet 'ruff' at all the snowflakes out the window. I gave a soft, sleepy moan and forced my wide eyes shut.

The last thing I saw before I fell asleep was Yumi's face from above my head, reaching out a hand—

—with me completely ignoring it.

* * *

HA! HA!!!! _HA!!!! _

_I fooled you hobbitses!_

I bet you so thought he was going to tell her. Oh man, you don't even know. Yumi won't know. She woooon't! Never evah!

...well...maybe, maybe not. nyah. You're going to wait until I post more chapters.

Okay, I'm going to walk away from this story for a while to work on my other stories and stuff. Because I need to. (For those interested, I'll be working on Time Paradox and Unknown Scar)

Until then!


	13. Brugger Bows and Periwinkle Woes

Oh my. It's been so long. I've been feeling poopy, been working on my schoolwork, and my computer's power supply went out for a walk so we had to get a new one...

I'm still feeling a tad bit poopy, but not as much.

I'd like to dedicate this chapter to my friend and crazy TeamAWESOME partner, known as HopelessIdiot both here and on DeviantART. Without her, the "Brugger Bow" would never be.

* * *

Chapter Thirteen: Brugger Bows and Periwinkle Woes

_Short Release of Mind_

It was damp. That was my first impression of the new environment I stood in. It was damp, and water was silently dripping from some random place above onto my head and the floor. Though I couldn't see a thing at first, soft, warm light slowly made the room dim enough to barely make out certain details of the place, such as the abused, old look of the strange, labyrinth-like room. The labyrinth was made up of ten feet tall chain link fences and metal walls, both wet and rusted, as was the floor. The ceiling was lost above my head in pitch darkness, the water dribbling down from there. I glanced around, waiting for something to happen. After a while, it seemed like nothing would. Taking a glance behind me to reveal that I was at a dead end, I heaved a sigh of preparation, then stalked out into the maze.

I felt half-conscious as I navigated through, my legs walking fast, disconnected from my brain. It seemed as if they knew where they were going, as I made no mistakes and went straight to where I apparently needed to go. That place just happened to be another wide dead end. I stopped, stood there just in front of the rusted steel wall, just staring and not feeling anything.

Footsteps from behind me made me slowly turn around, revealing something that threatened my instincts to stay unconscious.

I wanted to scream.

Yumi stood there, pasty green skin, large eyes with small slits for pupils and a pale red for the whites. Her arms were elongated, swaying just above her kneecaps. Her fingers were long and spidery, devilishly hooked at the ends. She was skinny, like a sick Disney princess, and her torn and dirty tank top revealed enough of her torso to allow me to see bony ribs poking out hungrily, heaving in and out with each labored breath. Twisted ears had a gnarled impression as they jutted through the greasy mat of her hair. Each step she took with her barefoot sent mini pools and fountains of blackish thick blood spraying from the harshness of the floor. Her cheeks were sunken, and her mouth was, surprisingly, a normal size. However, just a peek beyond her lips revealed jagged teeth, and the exhaled breaths were dotted with black beads of liquid shooting out. I gagged as I stared at her, the crusted brims of her eyes resembling some sort of disease.

What stood in front of me was my fault.

Yumi stepped forward, and I felt emotions and reality burn back at me, my head finally coming awake in the dream. My Adam's apple jogged up to the bottom of my chin as a cry got stuck in my throat. She took another step, and I began to sob. Water dribbled from the ceiling, joining my tears as Yumi began to speak in a calm, cold voice, shivering my spine dead.

"Macbeth, Macbeth…," she began. My lower lip shuddered in recognition, and my mouth split open in faulted pain.

"You were told to beware Macduff…,"

Coughs escaped me and spread bile to my tongue. Yumi came closer, the faintest hint of a smile on her face.

"You were given a choice, Macbeth…," she listed, then opened her arms wider as she said the next name, as if indicating herself, "Or Macduff…,"

Oh God.

I felt a string of mucus begin to ooze out of my nose as I finally realized the mystery of the names. I already knew I was Macbeth. Now I knew the other one.

Yumi was Macduff.

Yumi was going to be the death of me.

"Macbeth, Macbeth…," she continued, only about twenty centimeters away now, "You left Macduff. You've chosen ignorance. Your world will end. Macbeth, Macbeth…,"

Saliva gurgled in my throat, and my knees began to buckle as she finished.

"Ended in new life, Macbeth will have no slack. A short time to ponder, but no turning back."

"Yu…Yumi…," I whined, watching as the black blood became more and more frequent. She gave one last step closer, and we were almost touching. Her small pupils fixated on me, slicing through my mind. My stance wavered as she finished up.

"Macbeth has nowhere to run or hide. No escapes for Macbeth, save the dagger that may float in front of your eyes. Is it there? Can you grasp it, Macbeth? Tell me, what will you do before this world ends…?"

I couldn't stand it anymore. I fell forward, grasping onto the Yumi zombie and toppled to my knees, whimpering and weeping at the monster I had created. Yumi fell with me and kneeled right there in front of me, letting me cry.

"Yumi…," I blubbered, "Oh no, Yumi, no no no…I'm so sorry…I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…,"

Warm liquid from above splattered onto me, and for the first time I realized that it wasn't water that was dripping from the ceiling.

It was blood.

My throat rattled and a loud, strangled scream escaped me, and all reality just broke down. Yumi stayed silent and still, waiting and watching. Thoughts came to my mind—I was going to die. I was going to die, and these thoughts kept running through…

_Mother—_

_Aelita—_

_Yumi, love—_

_Xana—_

_Father—_

_No, God no, not…_

_Nevaeh—!_

Hooked fingers scraped along my back, digging into my skin and making my shoulder blades drool hot darkness. Yelps of pain mixed with my sobs, but it soon occurred to me—the zombie was hurting me, but for once not mortally and for once, not in pure pleasure. Her breast pressed lightly against mine, and felt her sharp chin rest on my shoulder.

She was embracing me.

"You belong to us. Here you'll stay, then…," she whispered, pity and a small amount of affection in her normally emotionless voice, "as a friend and memory,"

One last strangled sob of no, and I slipped back into the half-dream state as Yumi rocked me from side to side. Dizziness took me, and the blood from the ceiling swam around until it blacked my vision, and I fell back into darkness.

ANESTHETIC: Healing wounds with truth.

Given by Aelita

The arrival of snow had made the kids very hyper and antsy, especially with winter break just around the corner. I had already talked to Mrs. Periwinkle about my staying at her house during the break, and quite regretted telling her that in addition to that, Mr. Delmas had politely refused in letting Nevaeh stay with me for a weekend; "for her safety" he reasoned. I could understand that part, and Mrs. Periwinkle could too, only…she thought I was perfectly capable taking care of her as it is.

In the middle of free time Ms. Weber had called me into the principal's office to discuss 'rooming matters', and I found myself sitting in a chair right in front of Mr. Delmas's desk.

"Now, I've already told you about the reason why I think it would not be a good idea to house your little sister here, and although you agreed you gave me a number to where she resides. I'm just about to call that number; I thought that you'd like to be here for it,"

Solemn, I nodded in readiness. Of course I wanted to be here for it, but as Mr. Delmas put the phone on speaker, I suddenly began to question this…

"Yes?" Sarah answered, just as the last few toddlers made their way to bed, "This is Mrs. Periwinkle's Day Care, how may I help?"

Mr. Delmas cleared his throat before he spoke, "Yes, this is Jean-Pierre Delmas, I'm the principal of Kadic Academy. May I speak with Mrs. Periwinkle?"

"Certainly," Sarah obliged, turning around and calling for her great aunt. As Mrs. Periwinkle came into hearing range, Sarah quietly explained who was on the phone. A low, knowing and slightly dangerous 'ahhhhh' came from Mrs. Periwinkle, and the phone was exchanged.

"This is the head of Kadic, I presume?" she greeted without a hello. Mr. Delmas didn't seem to notice and folded his hands, proceeding to talk.

"I was given your phone number as one of the responses to Reese Anders keeping his little sister here at Kadic, and was just calling to see—,"

"Oh, you don't have to tell me. I know of this blasphemy of which you speak. Tell me now, how would Nevaeh coming to be under the care of Mr. Reese for hardly two days not be an asset to both of their growths?" she interrupted. In the short silence Sarah was heard quickly and urgently hustling the last of the children into their beds and closing the doors, recognizing the top of the volcano coming loose.

Oh, how it ever came loose.

"Uhm—," Mr. Delmas paused, shocked. Mrs. Periwinkle suddenly sprang into hot-headed action.

"Now look at this here! Your pauses, you must think of a reason! Think hard, my good fellow, because as soon as you see those two together, you'll forever regret your first decision, don't doubt my judgment! Listen here, you no-good spittin' ungrateful 'prince'-apal! I'll be damned the day I kept these two separated from each other! Do you see our little predicament?"

My mouth stretched wide across my face in a straight line, pulling my cheek muscles back. A flush of red began to spread along my cheeks from the effort I took not to break out in laughter. Mr. Delmas blinked superbly in surprise, struggling to find something to say.

"Well, now here, I'm not sure if a middle-high-school is appropriate for a toddler—,"

Like a flash as hot as fire, Mrs. Periwinkle pounced upon him in a second.

"Your excuse is hardly adequate, I dare say! You've not seen the best of Mr. Anders, have you? In his hands there would be no harm coming to her whatsoever—verbally or otherwise."

I turned my face to the side in embarrassment, little spurts of spit popping past my lips, mirroring the laughter I was hiding. Mr. Delmas was about to say something to close the case, but nothing could ever close the case of Mrs. Periwinkle.

"My, you mule-honkin' son-of-a automobile dealer! I've never seen such ignorance for the children and youth of these times! Damned fish food, that's what I say! You polyester primpin' handheld monkey-wrench! Look at yourself and the office you no doubt surely sit in! I snort in your direction! My nose is upturned at you on the street, and my scowl is for you, dear man! No one can stretch the relationship of siblings, and I dare say you will _not_ be the first! You bee-hive lickin' freebootin' shenanigan! I'll die the day you disallow little Nevaeh to visit her brother! Upholstered beach spandex man!"

By the time she was finished, I was crouched all the way over, my head almost between my knees and my hands covering my face, my body randomly jerking from the failed attempts at holding the laughter in. My God, this woman. I'd hate to be Mr. Delmas.

A soft knock at the door was heard, and it clicked slowly open and Yumi peeked in, talking before she saw the scene.

"Um, Mr. Delmas, Sir, Ms. Weber wasn't here so I was just wondering if I could…,"

Silence filled the room, Mr. Delmas staring at her with wide eyes, me crouched over and jolting with each voice-cracked squeal of random short laughter that sounded like crying, and Yumi looking in, very confused and suddenly apologetic. Before she could excuse herself, however, Mrs. Periwinkle butted in again, still on speaker phone.

"_Oh-hooooo,_I get it now, you're going to try and pull the 'I'm way too busy' trick on me, I see through your ghostly lie, poltergeist! Pray tell, how old are you?"

Mr. Delmas's voice sounded rather beaten and high as he stuttered his answer, "F-Forty-eight…,"

Forty-eight and almost white? Wow, Mr. Delmas.

"_Forty-Eight!_ Bah! BAH! Hardly enough to be workin' enough! You whinin' whippersnapper! When I was growing up we never complained 'bout nothing, you better believe that, you jaw-slack drool factory! No one wants to hear a utopian whiney-face sissy Sasquatch moan about his Brady Bunch troubles, no sir! No, I'd rather hear an affirmative to allowing Reese's little sister come stay with him on the off days whenever they please, so what do you say you lumber-jackin' fool-trappin' mole-pluckin' nose-pickin' xylophone-stealin' quarry-blowin' art-burnin' cow-squealin' beet-pluckin' lukewarm-tea drinkin' horse's arse!"

Total…complete…vacuum…silence.

Yumi was still in the doorway, her jaw dropped open. My body tremors became intolerable and I sat back, leaning in the chair and keeping my face covered. Mr. Delmas turned into a marble statue, blank for words.

"Pbbbt…mmf, eeep!" my lips sputtered from behind my hands. I love Mrs. Periwinkle so much. Not because she was doing this for me, mind you, just because. Just because.

"Answer me, thick-headed gnome-beard! Answer or I'll answer for you! Answer in the name of the fat oily sunscreen you lather on your fleshy-white whale beer-belly! Answer in the name of the Kikkoman soy sauce I'll hold over your head when I come down there to get your answer! Yes I know where you are! Answer me this instant, you poppycock pinsnippit picklin' Queen Marie Antoinette, you hairball-hockin'—,"

"Alright, okay, OKAY!" Mr. Delmas screamed to be heard. Mrs. Periwinkle barely sounded like she had enough patience to wait for him, but did nonetheless, a whole barricade of taunts shoved behind her lest he take too long. He made sure he didn't.

"Yes, yes, Reese Anders may have his sister over for as many weekends as he would like—,"

"What's that, I can't hear you! I'm going deaf in this ear from all your rootin'—tootin' shoutin'! And proper courtesy, you know! You young whippersnappers haven't been taught to be polite to your elders now, haven't you? Those Japanese people, spend a decade in Japan learning your goll-dang respect, squirtin' savage! I said _I can't hear yoooou!_"

Loud giggles unwillingly burst from Yumi's mouth, and finally my hands fell from my face, revealing a fire-engine red splash of joy creases and a tight grin that barely held back my rather abundant laughter. My head laid back over the chair, soft thrusts of premature chuckles poking my vocal cords. I thought I was going to die right here, laughing all too hard.

"Y-Yes Ma'am! Of course, Ma'am! Reese Anders's sister may stay here, Ma'am—,"

Once again cut off.

"What's that I hear? My my my! Only respect for the elderly? Shameful! Shameful! I'll have your head over this in the French Revolution! You lard-flabby faced cat whooper! Polly-want-a-cracker slacker! Puffin-fluff-pin worm! Black-beetle-face-huggin' alien! New-fangled-Nuclear rotten grocery bag!"

Mr. Delmas had the greatest look of stupid defeat on his face. I wish Milly and Tamiya were here, _seriously_.

"Yes Ma'am! Mr. Reese Anders and his dear brother—uh, sister may stay there—here, every-no, weekend-days! Ma'am!"

There was a short interval of anticipated silence where Mrs. Periwinkle was silent. All three of us waited for her next words, two of us eager, the other one sweating.

"I see. Very good, my man. Work on that stutter there, it's not flattering in public!" She exclaimed, then promptly hung up.

Three seconds.

Two.

One.

I couldn't hold it any longer, and I completely collapsed in the chair, chest, belly and face hurting from the get-go at how hard I laughed. _How hard I laughed._ It was the greatest feeling in the world. I don't think I've ever laughed harder in my life. Yumi joined me with hearty giggles, both of us knowing it was impolite but we just simply couldn't help it. My temples thumped in time to my choking laughter, and I proceeded to clumsily stand up, holding onto the chair. I wanted to thank Mr. Delmas for his time and humiliation, but words couldn't come clearly out of my mouth. A thankful wave and nod had to suffice, and I stumbled out, brushing past Yumi, who held the door open wider.

"Um…Miss Ishiyama, what is it that you wanted?" Mr. Delmas shakily asked. Yumi put a hand just over her mouth as she replied breathily, chuckling in between statements.

"Oh…it's nothing Mr. Delmas, really! I'll talk to you…Hahahahaha! I'll talk to you later, okay?"

With that she shut the door. One short moment passed with no laughter as we gave each other a short stare, then we fell down, clutching our stomachs with the boisterous noise we made together on the secretary's floor. It was just too funny to let go. Minutes passed, and we were still laughing with as much gusto as when we had started, only by this time we weren't quite on the floor anymore.

Ms. Weber entered to see us up against the walls, coughing and choking and aching, but still smiling widely and hooting excessively. A confused expression crossed her face, and she hurriedly asked us to leave, questioning in her voice. We obliged, still chortling. We were still so bad that Yumi wrapped an arm around my waist and leaned, while I grasped her shoulder for support. Vaguely we heard Ms. Weber ask Mr. Delmas what that was about, and him, raw-faced, explained that it must've been a laughing-gas lab. This just made us laugh harder.

In between our chuckles of enjoyment, little words were sputtered out in memory, launching us back into full-blown laugh-attack once more.

"Poppycock!"

"Pinsnippit!"

"Lumber-jackin'!"

"Cat whooper!"

No one understood when we got to the courtyard, but we didn't care. By the time we had walked to the dorms we still hadn't calmed down, but we were steady enough to walk by ourselves. We separated at the staircase, both laughing and still calling out the insults that Mrs. Periwinkle had. It wasn't until I reached my dorm that I realized that I had just spent the happiest time of my life laughing together with Yumi.

It just made me laugh more in merriment.

The very first thing I did when I got back was pull out a notebook and began to write every word she said, a perfect copy.

Odd thought I was a real nutcase.

CORNY: The only thing better than hairspray,

That's Jer!

Winter break arrived finally, and not a moment too soon. Kids were jumping off the walls on the last day of school—literally. I was only too glad when Sarah drove up the car, with Mrs. Periwinkle in the passenger seat and Nevaeh was bouncing about in the restrictions of her seatbelt, just a tad too eager to see me. At the reluctant signal of Mrs. Periwinkle's old wrinkled hand, Nevaeh unbuckled her seatbelt with the help of Sarah, and as soon as I opened the door she leaped out and tackled me at the stomach, with a few random spectators to watch.

"Waarrrgh!" I cried, stumbling back and just barely catching her. Luckily my duffel bag was set off to the side so I didn't trip over that, but the unexpected weight of a toddler against my torso wasn't exactly accounted for, and I was knocked back to the wall near the gatehouse, Nevaeh's feet dangling just above mine.

"Yeesh, Nevaeh, you're going to kill me one of these days!" I exclaimed falsely, setting her down and walking back to the car, tossing my duffel all the way in and clambering in after it. Nevaeh waited patiently as I buckled her into the middle seat and I buckled into mine. She giggled at me profusely as Sarah pulled out back into the road and started heading back to Mrs. Periwinkle's house.

On the way I noticed quietly that we passed Yumi walking to her house in the snowfall, and I breathed a short sigh as the quick thought of our little laughing incident, a little sad. It was the best memory I had, but sadly it didn't exactly pull through. It was more of a one-time thing, and whenever we're both in good moods we'd murmur a taunt to each other, but that's as far as it was taken. There were other memories that held a deeper rut in the Reese-Yumi relationship that weren't quite as happy, and they surfaced those feelings a lot more commonly than the good one, but, however, it didn't mean that it was a lost cause. As I said, every now and then there'd be the quickly mouthed or whispered word of '_whiney-face sissy Sasquatch!_' Was it ironic that his daughter called herself Sissy?

A sharp poke in the thigh shook me from split-second thought, and I pretended not to notice, and just poked her back in the arm. She giggled again and poked my leg. It wasn't long before it was an all-out poke war between us. Mrs. Periwinkle witnessed it, but didn't do anything to stop it. In fact, she called the shots like a referee. Sarah had a small grin on her face as she pulled up into the hidden driveway through the back.

Soon I regretted helping Nevaeh with her buckle, because she climbed right over me to the door, waiting for it to be open.

"Arr—Nevvie! Alright, I'm opening it, scoot back though, okay?" I said, uneasily unlatching the door and lifting her carefully down onto the snowy ground. She stamped around, making fresh tracks and waiting for me to successfully get out, duffel bag slung over a shoulder.

She then looked up at me and smiled brightly, eyes closed with snowflakes dotting her warm hair and rosy cheeks. We then proceeded to enter the household, starting a whole different chapter of this year.

Best days of my life.

Evenings were abundant with warm fireplaces and storytelling, in which I started a good series of stories to tell to Nevaeh and all of the little toddlers that stayed with Mrs. Periwinkle. All of these stories, all of them, were based off of none other than the adventures that I had experienced first hand on Lyoko. I debated on whether to change my friend's names, but I decided not to. When I came into the story, I simply named the character role "Ulrich," as it was and should be. It was unbelievably cute how they reacted to my stories—that is to say, they absolutely loved them, Nevaeh especially. Even Sarah and Mrs. Periwinkle enjoyed them, both of them eagerly awaiting the next chapter in each cliffhanger I made. Even so, the best part about that was that the kids really believed it was true—and it was so fuzzy inside knowing that they really _were_ true.

Mornings were spent with fresh brewed tea breakfast for the three of us, Sarah, Mrs. Periwinkle and I before the kids woke up, and as soon as they did it was a madhouse. As soon as everyone was fed we all dressed up to go outside and play in the front yard in all of the snow. Mrs. Periwinkle more often than not stayed inside making lunch, but every now and then she'd come and sit on the porch, watching us. Sarah was usually there just to supervise and play with them, and I was (according to the kids) strictly there as a plaything.

Lunch was most often a bowl of hot soup of all different kinds, tasty and delicious. After naptime, we'd usually hit outside again to repeat the morning until supper. Naptimes were spent in Mrs. Periwinkle's living room, right in front of the fireplace, with all three of us taking turns on watching the bedroom hallway on different days. I usually sat there and read in the hallway and in the den, switching off with talking with whoever was there with me. There were times that the kids had us so tuckered out that we ourselves took a nap right there in the living room. Warmest memories for me were the times where we talked together about anything and everything.

The one day I remember the best was one morning, the day before Christmas. Cars were everywhere on some last-minute shopping, ultimately causing traffic jams everywhere. Mrs. Periwinkle was in the house, cooking up a hearty soup, and Sarah was sitting on the porch to take a quick rest. A snowman had been built on the right side of the yard, and the kids and I were on the left, all playing our own little games with each other under the abundant chunks of snow falling from the sky. A jam had just been started at the intersection with the roads flanking Mrs. Periwinkle's corner road house. We were out there, just as every day, fooling and laughing like always. Suddenly there was a change in the toddlers' personality as Nevaeh instantly turned against me, making all the other toddlers follow suit.

"Chaaaaaarrrrge!" She called cutely. My first thought in fact was _how cute!_ Until, of course, I realized that she really meant it.

_Oh crap_.

All of the fifteen toddlers moved in a single wave, surrounding me and attacking and grabbing with meager snowballs and wool mittens. I caught onto their game, and tromped about, stepping big so they would avoid my feet, and roared loudly, trying to imitate one of those famous movie monsters. They all screamed and yelled, intent on bringing me down. Spotting a russet head of hair through the crowd, I growled, and reached down, grasping it underneath the armpits and lifting it up out. Nevaeh screamed in excitement and kicked wildly in the air.

"A prisoner! I have a prisoner!" I cried triumphantly. I was pretty sure a lot of the cars that were backed up were now watching the yard intently in their wait.

"Eeek! Save me, save me!" Nevaeh shrieked (giggled, actually) as I swung about, stepping this way and that and holding her high, growling and baring my teeth at all the other kids. They all squealed and ran at first, but one smart and brave one stopped in the midst of chaos and cried out above all the others to rally them up.

"'E's Zanna! Get 'im!"

Once again, _oh crap!_

Like an organized troop of little Spartans, they all turned to face me and ran, bowling into me and attacking me with more gusto than before. I growled this way in that, more in defeat than anything else, as they all bombarded me. I raised Nevaeh higher than my chest, which ended up in being a huge mistake. Sarah had been watching, and had suddenly decided that she was tired of doing that.

Like the softball pitcher she used to be, she rolled up a snowball and with perfect precision she pitched a deadly one, smacking me square in the sternum. I let out a short 'urk,' and everyone went silent to see what would happen. As a double signal, one as a sign of defeat and the other as a sign that I was alright to Sarah, I roared one last time.

"Nooooooooo!"

Keeping track of where I fell since they were all around me, I collapsed backward, making sure Nevaeh safely landed on my stomach. Cold snow met me as my ground, and melted around me as I lay there, utterly defeated. I closed my eyes, faking death.

"Izzee dead?" one asked.

"No, he's breefing." Someone said

"Ded people breef!" a different one stated.

Nevaeh righted herself on my stomach, straddling my waist and leaning on her hands over my chest. I felt her moist breath gently touch my face. I counted to five as she cutely asked one word.

"…Brugger?"

"Raaaah!" I shouted, instantly coming alive and grabbing her again. She squealed in surprise and everyone backed up. Mrs. Periwinkle appeared in the doorway as I stood up again, tucking Nevaeh under my arm.

"Alright you crazy little rats, lunch is ready! First come first serve, I've made hot chocolate!"

At the words 'hot' and 'chocolate' the yard was full of excited screams and everyone began to run into the house. I set Nevaeh down, and gave her a head start before we began to race inside. Right before we took off however, I noticed a certain car in the traffic jam (which hadn't moved since they began to attack me) and noticed a face in one of the windows. Yes indeed they were watching, having nothing better to do. I could recognize them from a mile off anyways.

It was Yumi.

About halfway there Nevaeh surprised me with a skidding stop, and I almost fell from how fast I stopped past her. I swiveled around, confused, and crouched down.

"Is something wrong, Nevvie?" I asked, using her nick-name. Her chin was pressed to her collarbone as she stared down at the pale pink strings that hung loosely from the collar of her dress underneath her coat.

"Th' bow's gone…," she murmured lowly. Acting before thinking I took the salmon strings in my hands and began to tie them. But as soon as I tied the base I realized something very crucial.

I didn't really remember how to tie a simple bow.

For a while I paused, straining to recall how to do that, but nothing was coming to me.

_Left one goes…no, that's not right. Right? Right one…no, that's not it either—wait, what?_

Struggling under a toddler's patience, I quickly improvised, making it up as I went. The ending result was, um, rather ugly, with only one bow sticking out and the extra strings wildly sticking up at odd angles. I coughed uneasily.

"Er, you can go see Sarah about this…," I explained. To my surprise, Nevaeh looked up and beamed at me, showing all of her tiny teeth. Then, before I knew what was happening, she sprinted past my still in-air in bow tying position hands, yelling in excitement the entire way to the door.

"It's a brugger bow, look! Lookit, Sarah, it's a brugger bow!!"

Sarah chuckled heartily as she held the door open, waiting for me to climb up the stairs, flabbergasted.

She gave me a wink, and after I motioned for her to go in first she caught up with Nevaeh, gently ruffling her hair. Right before I stepped inside after her, I glanced back at the street.

The traffic just began to move, and Yumi turned away, focused on the back of the seat in front of her. I shook my head and shut the door, answering Mrs. Periwinkle's calls for the 'lazy brugger boy.'

"Your soup's stone cold, lazy brugger boy! I hope you're good and happy, there's no hot chocolate left! Serves you right, then!"

Of course she was kidding, she always makes way more than enough. Still, Nevaeh took this fine opportunity to point out the mistake in Mrs. Periwinkle's fractured language.

"It's_brugger_, not brugger, mizzes Ferriwinkles."

Nostalgic.

* * *

Never, ever get Mrs. Periwinkle angry.

Ever.

Now you see why I love her?

(end fluff chapter)


	14. Scorched

Whoopiedoo, I absolutely HATE my stomach flu!

Ohmygod. That rhymed. I am SUCH a poet!

Ahem. Anyways, this may seem like a fluff chapter...AT FIRST. BWAHAHAHA.

* * *

Chapter Fourteen: Scorched

_Running out of places…_

When we had returned for school after winter break, a new semester had started—meaning that I had dropped the health class (thank God!) and had moved on to a music class.

I don't think it took very long for the teacher to discover that music was in fact a hidden passion of mine. Given, we got rid of our piano quite a while ago, but that doesn't exactly mean I didn't get more than enough chances to play it, especially in random places such as school. The teacher seemed a little too thrilled that I had an interest in music, and constantly pestered me about accompanying the art teacher for maybe some help in a sort of musical.

Pffft. I'll stick to playing piano for classroom projects, thanks.

Speaking of which, this whole thing had also revealed to basically everyone else that yes indeed, I was rather good at playing piano—and just music in general. The people included on who learned this were Jeremy, Aelita, and yes…Yumi.

The thought of Yumi suddenly brings anxiety to my brain, as I know with every look she gives me that she's dangerously close to pulling me aside one night to ask me just all the questions she's been meaning to ask me for the past three months ever since that tornado hit. Being finally signed up for the martial arts class didn't help either.

I surprised even myself with how good I still was, despite the fact I only got out to practice about once every week or so. Yumi was a bit shocked too, at first. But before I knew it the past was repeating itself all over again—if not with a little bit of apathy to spice it up. The only thing that had changed, really, is my added height and strength that really only had a small asset to Yumi's ferocity. Finally, after so long, finally I was able to see the old Yumi again. This was her game and her life—and the rules were anything goes.

As a side note, I just realized that Jim has gray hairs. Quite a bit of them, too.

Mr. Delmas was more than generous enough to let Nevaeh come and stay with me every other weekend, but every time I tried to thank him discreetly he'd always wave me off—probably because it just brought back the memory of being humiliated in front of two students by a seventy-four year old lady on the phone. Oh well. We have a record of it, that's all we need.

In turn, Nevaeh's stays with us have been quite memorable, especially to her and the new friends she made.

Odd made a quick bond with Nevaeh in his jokester way, clowning about with her and making her giggle to the point where I'd worry over her health. Odd would always tell me not to dwell upon it too much, as Kiwi would look over her. I don't know if Kiwi liked little kids, but Nevaeh didn't seem to mind as she played with the dog's features so much that she made a game out of it. I almost felt sorry for the dog as he gave me a death stare, ears flat and lips pulled back to as far as Nevaeh could stretch them. At least he was tolerant with her.

Jeremy, albeit the sulk-monster that he was, often came and visited with us if Nevaeh just happened to be around. Most of the time it was just to curtly give Nevaeh a small trinket for her to keep, and she would always respond with a generous thank you, even though sometimes that gratefulness had to be urged by me first. Something told me that he deeply liked my little sister; it's just the fact that she was related to me made him a little more distant to her than he would've liked.

Aelita visited me with Nevaeh as often as she could, overly fascinated and enjoyed by her curiosity and her fantasies. More often than not she'd jump right in to Nevaeh's imagination, playing along with whatever she desired. Nevaeh warmed right up to Aelita only about an hour faster than the others, and thoroughly loved it when she was around.

And every now and then when Aelita came, Yumi followed quietly behind, like a silent, embarrassed black ghost. Her hesitation, of course, didn't fly past my sister's head, and Yumi unwillingly found herself at the center of attention as Nevaeh pulled her into her little play world. It's not like Yumi didn't have any experience with toddlers, it's just the fact that once again, Nevaeh was related to me. Still, Yumi got over this wall a little bit and danced along with her, letting the little girl toy with her however she pleased. At certain moments where she had forgotten everything about life beforehand, I saw a piece of Yumi that I had rarely ever seen before after I came back: sweet laughter, pure good-natured humor, and a type of succulent joy that was so hard to find nowadays. For some reason, Nevaeh had a certain impact on everyone that seemed to squeeze all of the good feelings out—from even the most shut up. Indeed yes, I did see Jeremy smile and laugh as Nevaeh pulled off a few of her cute stunts.

When I say that she squeezed all of the good feelings out in the open, I mean it for me possibly more than anybody else. It was all so strange and dream-like, whenever Nevaeh was around or the thought of Nevaeh stuck in my mind I became…shall we say, free. All of the past horrors, all of the mishaps and dangers and fears, they all dissipated into the relaxation and freedom that Nevaeh's innocence offered. I didn't have to lie with her. I didn't need to push her away. This was Nevaeh, and this was me. Every time she fell asleep on my chest in the middle of the bedtime story, and every time I took a breath with her weighing me down I felt a sort of softness that I hadn't felt in far too long a time. Nevaeh was mine. For a while, I was truly happy—and so was a lot of people around me. It was a release, yes.

But a painfully short one.

It was a Saturday on a week that Nevaeh stayed with Mrs. Periwinkle. Spring had finally arrived, and all of the snow had melted away, leaving the days lukewarm. In the afternoon we were to take a trip to an amusement park for a 'physics' test on the rides. Though many were excited for it, I silently stayed off to the sides. Parks meant rides. Rides meant roller coasters. Roller coasters meant heights. Heights at high speed meant a huge no-no. To my relief, there were a few other people that for their own reasons couldn't stomach a high-speed joy ride, so I basically hung out with them and a teacher chaperone, namely Mrs. Meyer. As she apparently said, she was a month in. In other words, she was expecting.

The day was gray and a little dreary, but nothing stopped the excitement of all of the amusement-lovers as they raced around, not giving a crap about physics but giving all they had for the best rides the park had to offer. Our little group of poopers did some things, bought popcorn, talked, went on some of the rides that weren't as severe as a roller coaster, and, of course, people watched.

It was during one of those rest moments of people watching. I was standing because there was no place to sit, and all the others were just sitting and blither-blathering about whatever they pleased. My eyes wandered about the sparse crowd, watching random scenes unfold before me. Strollers, parents, kids, random groups of teenagers from our school and others…

That's when our eyes met. Slate gray ones to lime green ones, both our eyes widened to dish plates, and I quickly excused myself. Her mouth had opened in shock, and if I had left any more time ticks in between, she just might say the wrong thing.

Taking a large sprint over, I bounded right to the group of friends she was with, including the nameless boy that she undoubtedly liked. She barely had time to utter a syllable before my hand slapped over her mouth.

"U—,"

"Don't. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't," I immediately whispered in a plea. The boy's eyes flashed in sarcasm as he quaintly replied.

"Wow, Tara, first off that's the first time a boy's ever run to you like that, and second off that's the most I've ever heard come out of his mouth in like, ever,"

Tara. Goddammit. Such a wrong time to reunite.

Uneasily I removed my hand from her mouth as she breathily replied to the boy in a voice dripping with fake venom.

"Shut up, Derek. Just shut…up,"

The boy, Derek, looked as if he was about to give a sharp, playful retort, but followed her order nonetheless as she continued, hoarsely asking me one very good and simple question.

"What the crap happened to you…?"

A very good question indeed.

"Oh, oh shi—…I…damn," I grabbed Tara by the shoulders, ducking behind a building so my group lost sight of me. I faced her against the wall, roughly in a panic. Tara was overly confused herself, and, dare I say it, scared.

"Oh damn…where do I start…?"

Tara stole a glance back at her friends, possibly telling them to stay where they were. She looked back up at me with yet again a simple answer.

"Start at the beginning,"

"…What did you notice when I first moved to your school?" I asked, trying to get a grip on where I should even start this story.

"Your cheek. And that every few days or so your…uh, skin got uh…,"

"Butchered?" I put in, suddenly into this, "Destroyed? Mauled? Beaten?"

Tara scrunched her eyes closed and shook her head to rid her mind of the word choice I had provided.

"Y-Yeah, that…,"

"And don't tell me—I'm a murderer turned into a ghost, right?" I sharply said, feeling unexplained anger rise through my muscles.

"Well I-I,"

"_Right?_" I confirmed, starting to lose it. Tara still kept her eyes closed as she answered.

"Yes—no, I don't know. I don't know anything. Ul—what's going on?" she slipped. I forced myself to calm down through a few deep breaths.

"It's Reese," I clarified, "Reese Anders now. Let's just say…I'm under alias,"

Tara opened her eyes, honestly curious and still confused. I launched into a very shortened summary of everything I had gone through, starting with leaving Kadic and my father's abuse, and hastily ending at Aelita, the newscast's mistake, and the paranoia I have that my father is out looking for me. By the time I was done, Tara's eyes were wide in astonishment.

"Reese…that's it, right?" she asked. I nodded to her, and she went on, "I knew it. Oh I knew we should've told someone. We were going to, actually. That week that you left…we were seriously going to tell someone that Friday. But then you were gone. We didn't know what to do after that. Derek—you know, that annoying boy of mine—suggested that we wait just one more school day after a week…was it a week or so? I don't remember, but all I do remember is going home that night and finding the…the newscast…you know.

"After that I was so scared that I had seriously screwed up. I couldn't sleep for nights. After a while I was able to sleep, but always when I was alone I just couldn't help…,"

I let out a long, low breath. There was a second or so of silence before Tara picked up again.

"And then I saw you here…I didn't know what to think. I thought you were just a likeness of, well, you know. Then you looked up at me and recognized me, and I just…I don't know. I don't know."

She shook her head, a short lonely braid of her crimson hair next to her face swishing back and forth. I looked at her for a while, sadly calm.

"If only I had said something sooner…," she whispered, still kicking herself for her mistake.

"Yeah, things may have been different," I supplied for her, "But there's nothing you can do. Tara, this is going to sound bizarre, but I need you to keep your mouth shut for just a little longer,"

Tara immediately straightened her gaze to me, utterly shocked. Before she could ask, I went on.

"It's going to kill you, I know. But I need you to stay quiet, _please._ You can tell your friends—they're good people. Honestly, Tara, this is for the best. Or maybe it's not. I know only a little bit more than you do. Please, just don't tell. _Please_. If something happens this time around, the weight won't be on your shoulders if you didn't tell. It'll all be me. Please, I know it's hard to understand, but you've gotta try. I don't want you or anybody else to get hurt. Whoever's dead in that river—_that's _the Ulrich Stern you knew. Please, Tara,"

Tara was silent for a long time as she stared at me straight in the eye, processing what she should do. For a while I was frightened she might say no, but after a while she finally gave in.

"Okay…Alright. Whatever you say. You know about this more than I do, that's for sure. I'm just…I'm just glad you're alive at least. I'm sorry about…you know," she finalized, saying a good-bye with a sorry.

"Her death wasn't your fault," I said, stepping to the side as she slowly inched away from the concrete building.

"I know…I know that…," she said softly, forcing herself to believe it. I was about to let her go when something caught my mind, and I grasped her arm, making her turn her head around.

"Tara, wait," I paused, mouthing a few syllables before continuing, "I…never thanked you for your hospitality," I confessed. She forced out a smile for her final answer to me, as well as the last few words until our hopeful next meeting.

"You never needed to,"

She jogged back into her group of friends, and I watched, mystified as they slowly blundered away to some of the park rides. I shook my head a few times, and returned to my group just as they were going to send out a few people to get me, seeing as if Kadic was leaving for the day.

It really was such a bad timing for a reunion.

HIDDEN: Your true self waits at every corner

Like some sort of Japanese Dragon.

There was ground, and there was gravity, though I couldn't see it. Everything was black—a nothing type of black. The air was moist and thick, and rather sickening. It was also very heavy with something, but I couldn't place it…until the zombie caught my vision, and I suddenly realized it.

Panic.

It was the Yumi zombie again, but she looked darker, more evil and definitely a lot angrier than before. Her entire aura seemed to spell out 'YOUR FAULT' as she stared at me, the thin pupils very catlike and demanding. She said nothing, but raised her clawed hands. All of the sudden new shapes appeared, in the figures of huge, black, wolfish dogs with giant shoulders sloping downwards to the rear, where a short tail swept back into nothingness. They were very rugged, sinister and feral, their eyes glowing softly in the blackness. There was a whole sea of them alongside the zombie and behind her, growling, snarling, and constantly dripping hungry saliva from the heavily fanged mouths. It was evident, they wanted meat.

Hellhounds.

The zombie spoke. It was short and vengeful, and like all the others, haunting. The only thing was, it was spoken as if it was a fragment. It was most definitely not a complete sentence.

"Open for attack!"

The dogs—the hellhounds, suddenly all started to bark and snarl louder than before, and each of their barks chanted one thing:

_Macduff! Macduff!_

Then, one yowled. The rest followed. Yumi stepped back, and they leaped. Fangs were at my neck, claws pinned me down, and mouths greedily took from my gut. Then—

Morning.

Sunday morning. Odd was messily sprawled over his cot again, and Kiwi was tangled in my legs. I have to admit it wasn't long before Kiwi was disturbed and Odd was left alone in the room. I was lucky this morning. I actually slept until nine a.m.

When I got to the courtyard I was greeted with a nice morning surprise of a reincarnation of the main figure of my nightmare, only with more normal colored skin.

Yumi stood with Aelita, gently talking to her and clutching something very, very familiar to me. Though the sheath had been replaced with a lighter, fancy black leather one, the hilt remained the same deep wine red it had always been, catching the sunlight in that same mournful way.

_That must've been…what she wanted to talk to Mr. Delmas about…_something clicked in my head.

She must have to use my sword instead of her family's ancient katana for martial arts practice. Now that I think about it I remember Jim wanting to ask Yumi a few questions off to the side during class. That must've been what it was, permission to bring a martial arts weapon for class to school. Apparently it was an affirmative, and must've been the reason why Yumi was here on a weekend.

As they were near the vending machines, and of course because my mouth was dry, I was a tad forced to encounter them and maybe eavesdrop on some conversation. My mouth was just dry, seriously. I swear it.

"…What do you mean another girl?" Aelita asked as I approached. Yumi flinched as I did, but kept talking nonetheless.

"I mean I saw him at the park. He was talking to someone else. Aelita…are you um, sure that he…,"

"Wait, you're saying that in the first place _I _have feelings for—,"

"Wait, no, nevermind. It's just that…,"

The machine filled up my cup in that moment's silence where Yumi struggled to find an answer or excuse.

"I, I have to go. Put this away. Um…see ya," she uneasily said as she jogged away just a little too fast. Aelita waited a moment more to make sure no one was going to come near when she picked up where Yumi had left off.

"You talked to another girl that wasn't from this school yesterday?" she inquired as I sipped the hot soap-water chocolate. I accidentally inhaled some of it when she mentioned the girl, and began to choke for a minute or so. Aelita patted my back until I stopped coughing, and waited for me to reply.

"Y-yeah I did…that was Tara, remember…? The girl I told you about from my other school?"

Aelita nodded, "Yeah. Yumi said she saw you um, intimately talk to her. She must've known you as, well, the other you, huh?"

I slid my jaw to the side as I contemplated what she told me, "Yeah. She knew me the other way around. Thank God I got to her when I did before she started shouting my name across the park. I just gave her the heads up on what the crud was going on in my life. You have to agree—that is a little intimate,"

There was a pause in our conversation as a few kids collected some drinks from the machine, separating me and Aelita for a second or so. When they had cleared, I asked her a question or two.

"So you say that Yumi saw me then?" Aelita confirmed this with a nod. I let out a whoosh of air and ruffled my hair nervously.

"Did she say if she heard anything…?" I uneasily said. Aelita made no hesitation to reply, easing the nerves.

"No. First of all it was way too loud at that park; second of all she apparently didn't want to be seen. That's all she told me so far until you walked up,"

Whew. I can relax again.

"Any heads up on Lyoko?" I asked quietly, noticing Jeremy obviously avoiding us. Aelita shrugged and knocked her head from side to side.

"Sort of. Xana seems to have calmed down ever since he attacked with the clone. Not calmed down so much that he's been quiet, but calmed down enough that he probably wouldn't be trying anything that bad anytime soon. Other than that…,"

"Same ol', same ol'?" I finished. Yeah, exploring the Digital Sea must be cool, but like always, something must get boring eventually.

"Yeah," Aelita said.

"Goody," I replied. Silence passed between us for quite a while before we parted to do our own thing.

Besides, Odd had woken up. The courtyard was sure to turn into a monkey house if I were to linger there.

HILARITY: Um, crazy spiked hair with a giant purple stripe through it?

Jeez, what an oddball.

The gym was empty. Some red mats were propped up against the wall, ready to be used if needed to. I slid out of my jacket and replaced my gloves with thick black strips of cloth specifically made for martial arts training. After I was thoroughly done wrapping them around my hands in that specific way, I grabbed one of the mats and laid it down on the ground, using my foot to guide it to the place I wanted it to be. As I took my shoes off, a door from one of the locker rooms shut, the banging sound ringing throughout the gym. In the middle of slipping off my second shoe I glanced up, seeing Yumi standing in front of the door. I debated on putting my jacket back on, but something inside pestered me to just let it be. Instead I concentrated on taking my sock off.

I heard Yumi's steps echo on the floor as she slowly approached. I didn't look up at her until my shoes and socks were stowed away near my jacket and gloves. When I did she met my gaze directly, unwavering with a little fire, but burning with both questions and anger. Thank god the questions overtook the anger.

She didn't take her boots off as she stepped onto the mat with me. Words didn't need to be exchanged; it was already known and official. It was an accepted challenge.

Without even bowing the first blow was delivered by the both of us, Yumi giving a rather high round kick and me stepping in and punching at her. I felt the wind of the round kick graze my ear as I moved in with my fist. She caught it right before it hit her cheek and twisted her hips even more as she controlled her leg so it hit my neck. There was no re-chamber involved so it didn't hurt; it was just a stun technique. Flowing with pure instinct, my left hand closed into a fist and jabbed forth in a low uppercut aimed to her stomach. Yumi spat a breath of air in my face in preparation for the blow and in an attempt to confuse me. The punch blew into her stomach, to which she bent her spine back to help take the blow. The wind got into my eyes and made them temporarily dry. Forced to flutter my lids a bit, I was left off-guard for a split second. Yumi took her chance perfectly and re-chambered her leg way back into a side kick chamber, and let it loose. I had enough time and warning to stride off to the side, therefore having her painful boot just kicking the left side of my gut instead of the center of it. It still hurt like hell, but it was in a less vital area.

Without hesitation to counter her kick I hop-stepped in just as she retracted her leg in an offensive side kick—similar to the standing side kick Yumi just threw, only moving inwards. Yumi jerked backwards by reflex and barely halved the slam by throwing her arm down so I kicked her hip instead of her chest. I set my foot down, closing the space between us so there was almost enough room to breathe each other's air. Yumi took immediate advantage of the mat and threw her hand, grabbing the shirt around the back of my neck as well as a bit of my scruff. Her other hand grabbed the thigh area of my pants leg. She lifted on the leg and jammed down the pressure on my neck, squeezing her knee into my stomach to allow a base for a human-like lever.

Using my own weight against me she flipped me through the air. Little did she know that's what I wanted her to do. As soon as she began to lift me up I grabbed her waist and shoulder in a mega-drag, pulling her down with me as I flipped. In result I fell pretty badly in terms of how you're supposed to do a back fall, but I had my chin tucked in far enough that my head didn't experience a whiplash. Yumi uttered a surprised gasp as she fell with me, and before she knew it she had landed ungracefully on top of me. Since I was prepared for this to happen Yumi was tossed to the side like a rag doll as I rolled, fixing my legs with hers so they were locked and she couldn't kick. My left hand found an arm of hers and pinned it to her stomach, while my right wrist pressed onto her neck, as if to restrict her breath. A minute or two passed with us like that, both panting hard as a smirk flashed across Yumi's face.

"Good one," she congratulated. I merely panted in reply, but in the middle of the fray I had forgotten one important thing.

"But not good enough!" Yumi exclaimed as she took her unlocked hand, enclosed it into a fist, and punched my face sideways.

Ow.

The match was fairly called a draw—one for me for catching Yumi by total surprise with the mega-drag, and one for her for having the last say with her hit. Though I wanted to stay and practice more, instinct screamed at me to leave before any questions were asked.

Obviously I didn't leave fast enough. I didn't even make it close to my things before Yumi reached up and grabbed me backwards with a rear choke.

"You're not going anywhere, boy," she seethed in my ear, "Sit. Now,"

Inwardly groaning, I let her ease her grip on me before pushing her away and sitting down on the red mat. Yumi sat cross-legged opposite of me and took in a breath to calm herself down. I found myself unable to tear my eyes away from her as I anticipated the storm that was undoubtedly edging to come.

"Your sister certainly has me and my friends occupied," she began softly. I sensed she was hiding back some pretty strong negative emotions, but started with this one instead.

"Mmm…she tends to do that," I replied, looking down and closing my eyes.

"It's funny how much you show your care for her…,"

Funny? Here comes the bomb.

"Mmm," came my response, as neutral as ever. After all I knew what was bound to happen next.

"…and yet you don't seem to show even a fraction of that care to anybody else," she finished, an edge of acid to her voice. I didn't flinch.

"You really love her, don't you?" she said, her voice wavering with emotion, "What about Aelita? Or hey, what about Aelita when you were talking to that other girl?"

"That 'other girl' just happens to be one of my friends from my old school," I retorted, immediately defending Tara.

"Just a friend?" Yumi shot.

"She has a boyfriend, Derek," I confirmed.

"And no one gives a crap about Jeremy…!" Yumi broke. Ohhhh shit. So _this_ is where she was taking it. I knew it was stupid to say this, but I did nonetheless.

"It's none of your business—,"

"None of my business? News flash, hot shot, Jeremy is my _friend_, and Aelita is too. Whatever you're doing to her—done to her, whichever—it's…you just don't understand at all."

Of course I don't understand. Of course I don't care. Of course I show my love only to Nevaeh, because she's the only _safe_ person I can show it to. Of course, of course, of course.

Of course _you_ don't understand.

"Oh yeah. _Bitch._ _Please_," I angrily muttered. Yumi's eyes flashed in anger. I ignored that as I finally looked up, brow furrowed in an irked manner.

"You have a strong bond with your friends, yes?" I asked rhetorically, "Then why are you speaking for them? Don't you think that if they had a problem with me they'd be smart enough to talk to me themselves?" I challenged. Score, big guy. Yumi flinched and retracted back, her lip curled over her canine tooth.

"What is this I'm seeing here? Why are you speaking in such a way about your '_friend_' Aelita? What _is_ this?"

A growl puttered about in Yumi's throat, and her legs slowly uncrossed. Her motions were lost on me as I finally pulled together my conclusions on the tongue.

"Is this…God forbid, is this _jealousy_? Come now, tell me—is it really _jealousy_?"

A harpy war cry blasted past Yumi's lips as she leaped, slamming me back on the mat. Her hands clenched about the rungs of my tank top, sweating and shaking. Creased in an angry wildcat way, her face growled over mine, teeth bared and eyes wildly angry. Nothing but a smirk dominated my face. I had got her.

But was she really all that jealous…?

Yumi looked as though she was about to carry on with this heated spat of hers, until she must've seen something out of the corner of her eye. The anger faded almost instantly as she glanced down at my tussled shirt, and almost instantly she gave a cry and let go of my tank top, sitting back up on my stomach. Slightly confused at first, I propped myself up on both elbows. Yumi's eyes never left my chest. I glanced down, then bit my lip.

She must've seen a few of my abundant scars—including a cheese grater one.

Yumi scrambled back so she was off of me as I sat up straight, scratching the back of my head and wondering how the hell I was going to work myself out of this one.

"I-I guess that was my next…,"

"Ehhhh, no. Sorry. No," I quickly responded, fixing my tank top so the collar line was higher up on my chest.

"B-But how…,"

"I said no," I replied, sharply this time. Yumi shook her head multiple times to rid the vision from her mind, and still persisted.

"Wh-What did you do to yourself…?" she asked into thin air, apparently not expecting an answer.

She didn't get one either.

Having had quite enough of this, I stood up and hastily grabbed my jacket and roughly pulling it on, discreetly slipping the yin-yang necklace into my pocket and removing my martial arts wrappings.

"Y-Your scars…," Yumi finally said after a while, "How many do…do…,"

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said falsely, putting my shoes on. Yumi muttered some sort of defeated sound effect as I headed out the door. I blinked as I stepped into the sunlight.

There was bound to be more questions to come after _that_ encounter.

When I got into the courtyard I noticed a few parents running about with the kid trailing behind. After a while I found Odd, Aelita, and Jeremy on a park bench and walked up to them.

"Um, what's up with all the parents?" I asked, jerking my thumb over my shoulder to indicate them.

"Oh that?" Odd piped, "Didn't you get the memo? It's parent-teacher conference day!"

Ohhhh. That.

Wait, _Oh! That!_

Ohhhhh boy. Maybe it's just me, but the thought of that brings my stomach to replace my heart and vice versa. Or maybe it was just the feeling that I've been having all day.

You know, that sick gut feeling that something bad is happening or will happen. I don't know. It's probably just my paranoia again.

And I'm going to keep telling myself that until it comes true.

Or not.

SACRIFICE: More of the willing type, really.

Like, pink-willing type.

Evening hit rather coolly with a little cold front in the way. That gut feeling had stayed with me, growing stronger as the day wore on, but I forced myself to ignore it. Parent-teacher conferences were still going on, though it had slowed down noticeably from the afternoon. Yumi had decided to stay the entire day and night here since her parents had already come and gone. The gang was hanging out just around the vending machines, just talking and stuff. I was sitting on a bench near them, sideways to the gate. I was in the middle of reading another Stephen King book—specifically _Misery_—and for some reason in the middle of a sentence I had the curious urge to look up at the entryway.

No…it couldn't be, could it…?

"Nevvie…?" I quietly asked the air. She was standing right there—shivering from the cold. Right in the entrance to one side. She looked at me very fearfully, and something lurched into my throat.

This wasn't right. Something is very, very wrong with this picture.

"Reese?" Aelita asked, noticing I was staring at something. Something slowly, magically clicked in my brain, and my voice was hard and demanding.

"Aelita, the vending machines. Get in there. Now."

Rather than question me even though she looked like she didn't understand, she obliged, edging her friends to go with her. Odd, being the thorough idiot that he is, protested rather than move.

"Huh? I don't get—,"

"_Move, _damn you!" I cursed, scowling at him and shoving him into the little shack that protected the vending machines. I was about to step back out when Aelita caught my jacket and asked me one question with her fear-filled eyes. Somehow she slightly understood. And yet she wanted to know the entire story.

Before I could say anything, someone answered for her.

"Come and tell me, Nevaeh, where exactly does big brother live?"

That hideous, dark, hateful voice. Shit.

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, damn and fuck," I swore in a hushed manner, forcing myself to press against the wall with the others. Everyone gave me the curious eye at to what I was so uppity about, before we heard a scream.

It stiffened my spine like liquid nitrogen. My head unwillingly banged against the metal wall as the scream split the silence and peace. Damn that gut feeling. Damn it to Hell.

It was right.

"Bruggerrrrrr!!" Nevaeh screeched. My teeth clacked together and began to grind as my eyes scrunched tight.

No. This isn't happening. This _can't_ be happening. Wake up, damn you, wake up!

"Bruggerrrrrr!!" She called out again, more desperate this time. My hands closed into fists of rage and helplessness. People in the courtyard began to murmur amongst themselves, when suddenly everything strangely went silent to me.

There was a crunching on the dirty gravel yard as he took steps deeper into Kadic. Him. My father. My goddamned father.

This isn't happening. It's a dream. It's all a dream. Wake up. Someone say Macbeth, someone say Macduff, I don't care! This is a dream, wake up! Wake up!

Nevaeh began to let loose very soft murmured cries, every now and then calling out for me. My mouth hung open in pain and I writhed against the metal, almost stepping out into sight.

Aelita caught me by the neck gently, and my tear-skimmed gaze turned to her. She shook her head desperately, even though she knew the pain I was going through. She was the smart one alright, but it was unbearable to just _stand_ there!

It's fake. It's all fake. Wake up. Wake up now.

_This is real_. I mouthed to her, my breaths choppy. Aelita bit down on her lip and slowly, sorrowfully nodded.

This is real.

"What is this? I know I saw him, he was sitting right…here…," My father said, most likely standing at the bench I was just at. Nevaeh whimpered, but was cut short.

I did _not_ want to know how.

He took a few more steps, once again whistling _Stairway to Heaven_. Suddenly, through the sweat on my fingers, my book dropped to the ground. It may have been quiet in reality, but to me it sounded like a bomb.

My father stopped whistling. Suddenly I knew where he was going to look next.

And suddenly I remembered something very, very vital.

I suddenly remembered my father's undying hatred for the Orientals.

I glanced over at Yumi standing beside Odd and made a very fast decision. I leaped across him and grabbed her mouth. She gave a frightened shudder as her eyes flew open. I took my hand away and basically squashed her against the wall in between me and Odd, praying, just praying that my father wouldn't see her or sense her.

Not a second later did he peek in to find us. A 'warm' grin spread across his features as he talked to us like he had just won a hide and seek game.

"There you are! What was that hiding game all about anyways? Come now, you can tell your old man, can't you?"

Most likely against my father's will, Nevaeh poked her head in to catch a glimpse of me. I locked my forlorn gaze with her, because I could outright tell that she was not in her normal sunny mood.

This little girl was scared out of her skeleton and wits. She was even so scared that she didn't dare cry anymore. It meant something. My father had to have done something to force her to be like this…something like…

All fears just got washed away in a blood-red ocean of anger. Just imagining what he would've, could've done sent blazing shots of fire screaming through the blood in my veins.

What have you done to her?

What have you done to Nevaeh?

What have you done to _my_ Nevaeh?!

My father stepped closer to me, looking around me in curiosity. He must've caught on that we—I—was hiding something.

"What have you got? Another hide and seek game?" He asked.

My voice seethed out like slow moving liquid lava as I replied, dark and irate, "Damn right I do, only this time I'm the seeker—and I seek with _this_!" I snarled, rearing back a fist and knocking him square in the jaw. Nevaeh yelped and dodged to the side as my father stumbled back. She still couldn't get to me through the tangle of legs my father provided. I winced.

He caught himself before he fell completely and glared at me deeply.

"If that's the way you want to play…," he warned dangerously, "Then I'll play like that…,"

"Go ahead," I snarled in response, "Just try me, bastard,"

Aelita held back a high protest. I didn't glance back to look at her. Nothing could be done now—the challenge was made.

My father's eyes flashed with a low 'very well.' Nevaeh softly whined, only to be slapped in the face by you-know-who.

My eyes widened in a split second, and before my brain told me what I was doing, I lunged right into my father, yowling and screaming like a wolf. We were knocked to the other side of the vending machines, and all that was going through my head was _how dare he? How dare he? Not Nevaeh, not my little Nevaeh!_

I was fairly surprised that no one immediately came to help from the courtyard even with all the screaming and ruckus being made. Nobody came at all. What was this? Some sort of sick joke?

My father found the ground and pushed me back even though I was still hitting and kicking blindly with all my might. There was a short pause, and just before I was about to pounce back at him I realized where his gaze was directed—specifically, right behind me.

Namely, at Yumi.

"So this is what you were hiding from me…," He plainly stated in a voice that only I knew meant immediate danger.

I froze, my fingers slightly shaking. Aelita tried to softly save what part of Yumi she could, even though she probably knew it would be of no help.

"Yu-Yumi…get back…," she stuttered.

"Yumi, is that her name now?" My father questioned, never taking his stare off of her. I flinched.

"You wouldn't just _happen_ to be _protecting_ her, now were you, my boy?"

They say that silence is the best and worst answer.

My face was slapped aside, and was knocked away, temporarily dazed. Nevaeh screamed my 'name' in high worry, stopped by my father snatching her up. Yumi let out a gurgled protest before she too was snatched. I let out a strangled cry and forced myself to my feet.

Lukas, my father, had dragged them out into the courtyard. I was about to full-blown blast out after them, before he pulled something off I could barely imagine he ever would try.

Out of his pockets came two very different items with all the same purpose. He took a gun to a random girl's head and pressed a knife against his own toddler daughter's throat.

"You protected this one. I can't imagine why you would protect this...filth. How...how could my own son do something like that?"

I flinched as he gave total disrespect for Yumi. It was only a moment before he went on.

"Choose, then. One or the other. Let's see where your _real_ priorities lie."

* * *

Heh. heh heh. I tells ya, this chapter invokes all of the evil laughter within me. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

Also, if you have any questions about the martial arts moves mentioned here, ask me! I'm in karate, ask me! (and I love the martial arts too!) In fact, my favorite part of this chapter is in fact--THE DUEL! Hee hee hee. (giggles away with my stomach flu)


	15. Division's Game

Krawww, I'm doomed. School sucksors. N' stuff. I'm workin' on it though.

Also, I'm doomed because yerr going to hate mees. Oh yuss you are.

But I'll be okay. Why?

Because everyone should Always Stay on the Bright Side of Life! Dee doo! Doo doo dee doo dee doo!

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen: Division's Game**

_Choosing the lesser of two Evils_

Nevaeh or Yumi.

Which one?

No. Neither. I can't take one. I need both.

Yumi or Nevaeh.

My sister or my love.

I can't take this. My head hurts. Decisions are impossible.

Nevaeh is the youngest. She's only two and a half. She's got a whole life ahead of her. Plus, Yumi hates you. She doesn't know you. Yumi could care less if you chose her, she wouldn't be flustered. She'd spit in your face if you chose her anyways. She's not expecting you to save her.

Yumi doesn't know me. And if she dies now, she'll never know. Never know that secret that's been burning inside of me for so long. She doesn't know the things that I need to tell her. She's got a family. A little brother. They need her to fight on Lyoko. I love her. I love her, I love her, I love her.

_Choose Nevaeh._

_No, don't!_

_Yumi…_

_I'd kill you if you chose me!_

_Nevvie…_

_Bruggerrrr!_

_But I love…_

_Both._

Yumi squirmed slightly in my father's grip. Hoping to somehow get some time, I raised my hands in a wait signal, and slowly circled him so I was out in the courtyard facing him. He circled with me, keeping the two girls still hostage. All three pairs of their eyes were on me, one green, the other two brown. My head rumbled and rambled with complete confusion. I had nothing to do. Nothing to say.

And I had no idea how long my father's patience would last.

"Tick, tock…," My father coldly reminded. I stifled a pained moan and forced my eyes to flash around. Suddenly I knew why no one was helping.

No one was _there_.

Yumi finally couldn't stand the wait, and began spitting at me in furious Japanese. I guess she figured if I knew some, I knew enough.

"What the hell are you doing? What are you _waiting_ for?! She's your _sister_, dammit! She's only two and a half! God almighty, it shouldn't be that hard of a decision, should it?!" She looked like she had a whole windbag of reasons backed up behind her, but her rant was cut a little short when my father turned the gun so he could twist the cold metal gently into her throat. She let out a small wince and stretched herself desperately away, only using her neck to do so.

"Why is it…," she pleaded quietly, still in Japanese, "so hard…?"

My father hissed a dangerous warning having to deal with the language she was currently speaking in. Yumi's voice died down with a quivering whimper that echoed into silence. She closed her eyes, probably trying to envision herself elsewhere. Thin, glistening tears began to slowly run down her cheeks because she understood that she was the best candidate to die. She was just trying to cope with that single, frozen fact that she was on the bridge of lifelessness. She was going to leave the material world, embrace the cold acceptance of whatever comes after this life, and mercilessly leave behind a little brother, two parents, and a diminishing group of determined friends who only wanted a safe world. That wasn't right. _This_ isn't right.

It's a Victor Hugo topsy-turvy town all over again—straight out of French literature class.

"I…I…," I stuttered. I what? I give up? I give in? I want Nevaeh? I want Yumi? I want both? I just want peace?

No…

I want revenge.

And yet I can't get it. Not now. Not with their lives hanging by a thin thread connected to a slowly turning death spool. This is the turning point. This is where I can finally snap, because I can have everything I want, but I can't have anything that I need.

"I…can't…,"

My father raised an eyebrow, as sharp as Mr. Spock's perfect expression.

"Can't," He confirmed shortly, "Can't."

My head spun, and I placed a hand on one side of my forehead to try to help steady it. Needless to point out, it didn't help. My father had no intentions on helping me either, as he soon made that apparent.

"I should've figured. You can't do anything anyways. Just look at yourself. Protecting a Jap like this,"

Wince and flinch.

"What's more, shall we dip back a few months? Your pathetic little attempts that you did back then?"

Oh God. He was referring to my mother. I dropped my head and clutched it as the blood pounded through my brain, reminded of memories best left forgotten. Softly, ever so softly, I began to moan in pain as the world became dizzy at the edges.

"Failed at everything you did. Before you switched schools that little group that you hung out with made you even more of a failure—and even though you changed somewhat you still carried on with your failures. All the way through. You even listened to your mother when you shouldn't have, and now, well, look where she is. I'm a little certain that if you'd have been there things would've been…different,"

I know that. I _know_ that, dammit! If I had just been there…If I had arrived there earlier…

The moans became more pained and louder.

"And look at what you can't do now. You can't even choose between your sister and a Jap. Maybe it was too much to ask to show up late for conferences. Well son? Don't you agree, you've failed?"

I _have _failed, haven't I?

I couldn't stop myself from leaving Kadic all those years ago, leaving my friends open to the nightmare that is Xana. When I got home I couldn't stop the abuse that my father gave—and was totally helpless against stopping all of the terror my mother went through. I was stupid at school—yeah, I got straight A's, but I was stupid to not get help then, tricking myself into not getting help, ever. Tara was there, but I took her for granted. Hell, I took _everything_ for granted, even in the heat of my father's never-ending fists. My mother _died!_ Not a breath left in her—heck, her lungs were probably torn out anyways! All of that blood that could've been avoided if only I had _stayed_, all of the paranoia of my friends' safety would've never existed, and my sister would be oblivious to this pain and fear. From the moment that I had received my first scar, my life had been a big file with capital red 'fail' stamped on it. Failed. Failed. Failed.

"Gaah…Gaah…," I struggled.

Forget the muttering. Forget all of that.

I had fallen to my knees, face turned to the unforgiving sky, fingers digging into my eye sockets, releasing a pained scream that must've been heard for miles, and must've echoed forever in the minds of all who heard it—well, except for my father of course. What else can I say? That I felt like a helpless leper whose skin was eating away to my organs underneath just by the pure knowledge that I couldn't save them?

_I can't choose._

_I can't save them both!_

A minute, maybe two, and my scream died down, leaving nothing—not even a crow—making the slightest amount of noise in that wake. My head dropped to the ground, devoid of any neck support. Hands went clammy and limp, and dropped to the dirt underneath my knees. Stray grains of dust attached to the dampness of my fingers. Breaths escaped my shaky ribcage, my back heaving dangerously up and down.

A choked silence followed. I could only imagine what was going through Yumi's head—and as for Nevaeh, I didn't want to know how she felt to see her 'strong' brother hopelessly break right in front of her. And for my dad, I could only hope that he wasn't thinking about what I didn't want him to do.

For a moment there was nothing, then my father sounded like he was going to say something, until something unimaginable happened. I'm talking about really unimaginable.

Most people put tons of faith into their siblings. Take Nevaeh for example: how much faith do you think she puts in me? Half her life? Ninety percent of her life? Her _entire_ life? That's a whole lot of faith, mind you, and put on _me_? God above, do you know how much that puts on my chest? You barely feel it at first until you either sit down and really think about it—or that certain sibling's life is placed in the face of danger. And once it is, the only thing that runs through your head is _I should've protected them better_. Though it mostly applies to older siblings, there is a smidgen of faith that the older one does put in the younger sibling.

I just keep wondering why I didn't put more of my faith into Nevaeh.

She _is_ my sister after all, and if anybody knows me, they know that I can't normally sit there and do nothing.

With that being said, my sister took full on after me by pure instinct, opened her mouth wide like a good girl should before taking in a mouthful, and with her tiny toddler teeth chomped down hard on my father's hand so badly that it nearly drew blood.

"_Gaah_, you little twit!" My father screeched as the knife dropped to the ground and his hand shot up in reflex, releasing the little girl. All too fast this happened, and before the both of us knew it, Yumi and I were screaming the same thing.

"Run! Run, Nevaeh! Ruuuun!"

Nevaeh stumbled a few steps away from my father, giving me one glance. Frantically I pointed to my right, to the woods and the vending machines. I stood up, emphasizing to where she should run. She choked a sob and half-crawled half-dashed into the vending shed. Safe, for now.

As soon as Yumi realized I had Nevaeh's situation pretty much covered, she took immediate action over the fact that my father was very distracted for one heartbeat. Using those heavily hurtful boots, she slammed down on Lukas's foot while at the same time grabbing the barrel of the gun, easily prying it away from her neck with the extra leverage the barrel gave her. It sure as hell wasn't perfect because of my father's rough hand, but the great news was that she pushed his hand far enough away to snake away from him. Bad news was that she stumbled as she uneasily broke from him, leaning way over. For half a second it looked as if she was going to grab the discarded knife, but as she drastically saw, my father was one step ahead of her as he put one foot on the blade. Yumi stopped short, gagged a bit, and gathered herself up to keep running.

My mouth didn't move fast enough to warn her. Light travels faster than sound—I only wish it were the reverse. All I could see was my father stoop down to pick up the knife, and my mind clicked to the obvious next step.

"Yu—Yumi! Yumi!" was all that came out before she got the message to nimbly dodge what could've been a fatal attack. That doesn't necessarily mean she didn't get hurt.

She gasped loudly; giving a short scream of terror as half of the blade plunged, slicing part of her side, at the belly. A sob messily escaped her lips as droplets of blood flew forward with the force of the stab. She stepped awkwardly to the side, her eyes diverted from everything else until I caught a short flash of them. I staggered and waited. My father looked half-triumphant, standing over Yumi.

"Where did you think you were going? Running away just like a good old Jap, huh?"

By the time the sound of the 'J' got out of my father's big mouth, Yumi followed through with her major feint, and dropped down, using her strong side and leg to sweep the legs out from under Lukas. She succeeded too—he went collapsing backwards and fell to the ground suddenly with a loud, unmistakable grunt.

The next thing that happened to him even made me flinch and had my heart twitch for him for about a fraction of a second. But only a fraction.

Reason being, Yumi's hard core boot came smashing into my father's 'prized possession' right before she turned tail and sprinted far away, leaving my father to writhe for as long as we hopefully needed.

My tongue flapped about in my mouth as Yumi gripped her wound desperately, wincing each time she put weight on that side, a cry of pain coming with each exhaled breath. Finally I found the grounds to talk as she approached doggedly.

"Yumi…! Yumi, Yumi! Are you okay? Yumi…!" I blabbered, unsteady. The last few steps she took fumbled straight into my arms. I side stepped slightly, thrusting an arm out as a bar to catch her at the shoulders, my other arm placed on her back to hopefully steady her.

"I'm fine…!" She gasped, rather surprised but still in high-pitched pain, "I'm fine…I'm, I'm fine!"

All of my thoughts and senses directed straight to her as I kept her upright, even though she was fully crouched over. She wheezed for breaths, half to try and cope with her wound, and the other half to try and calm herself down as she had just dodged a huge bullet. Just trying to calm the panic inside of me down myself, I busied myself with gently massaging the middle of her back (and bluntly ignoring I was around the area of her bra strap—yes, bluntly ignored, I swear.)

Yumi coughed, caught a weep and pulled it back, before she managed to spit out one whispered statement.

"Oh God, Oh God…I almost died, I almost…died…,"

I tried to tell her no, but that would be a blatant lie. What could I say? What could I do? I needed to say something, right?

"Do something for me…," I asked quietly with a trembling voice. Yumi struggled to straighten up, listening, "Please, I…Please, take Nevaeh away from here. Please," I pleaded, struggling to hold back a batch of tears of my own. Yumi gave me a long, blank stare, but warmly nodded, fully understanding. A tsunami wave of relief bombarded my heart, and a warmth came washing over me. It was similar to love, but there was a slight difference in it. Yes, I loved Yumi, and knew that she hated me. But if she was sensible enough to put aside her hate for one moment to help me in the best way possible by merely racing my sister away from Hell regardless if I was able to escape with her or not, then this was able to wrap a certain amount of security around me—a security I haven't felt in far too long.

We stood there, staring at each other, one in blank seriousness despite her wound, and the other in relieved shock. It was a tender, warm moment, brutally shattered within two seconds.

Something stirred behind Yumi, and my eyesight flickered to the background. All I saw was a small, dark hole, and the panic, anger, and reflexes instantly returned, washing away the soft moment.

"_Down!_" I screamed as I grabbed Yumi's back and basically slapped her down into the ground, giving her a face of dirt. She caught herself and stepped forward multiple times, swerving around just in time to see something she probably didn't want to see as I stepped in front of her.

The sound of somebody slapping a dictionary on a table echoed shortly through the still air as a bullet passed through an improvised silencer hastily fastened on in the moments that we weren't paying attention, signaling the immediate release of something very, very deadly. The source of the sound came from a position close to the ground as he still was, so it wasn't as deadly as it could've been, but it was definitely bad enough.

I knew what happened before I felt it. The bullet hit me soundly in the belly, just above the belly button. It tore through sinew and muscle, spurting a mini blood fountain from the hole. I don't know how far it actually got, but damn if it didn't almost tear through me whole. Yumi screamed louder than a lion's roar, and from that my judge was that something happened out there in my back—maybe a giant splotch of blood or something. Her cries became more feral like that lion though as I heard her unnaturally step in awkward patterns, probably dizzy from the reality of the situation. I'm sure being a Lyoko Warrior never brought out something this humanly disgusting.

But honestly forget about Yumi, because someone else saw this happen too, and the only reason why I hear her reaction better now was because of the sheer horror that she had seen this unfold before her vision before she was ready.

"Bruggerrrr?!" There was confusion and yet a tad bit of understanding in Nevaeh's voice as I fell to my knees once again, trying to cover up the dire hole in my stomach. I scrunched my eyes to try and dull the pain as well as gritting my teeth—although all it did was make me breathe and cough out blood. It was a hideous mess. And my two and a half year old sister witnessed it.

"Oh God, Reese? Reese?!" Yumi called out desperately. Through the crunching feeling of just being hit by a train, I managed to grind out an urgent reminder.

"Nevaeh…ungh, get Nevaeh, go! Go!"

Yumi coughed and dashed over into the vending machines as I finally opened my eyes to see my father shakily get up, still suffering from Yumi's crushing boot of doom—the gun in his hands and still pointed at where I was standing. I gave him a nasty glare; not because he shot me, but because he was aiming for somebody he should've never even thought of shooting in my presence. Off to my side Yumi quickly caught Nevaeh before she ran out to me, quietly, hastily trying to counsel her as she wrapped her trembling arms around her, making sure Nevaeh couldn't see what was happening. I could hear the presence of tears in her voice as she feverishly whispered to my sister.

It made me hate my father even more.

And all of that hatred gathered within me and gave me unexpected strength.

Placing one foot up and underneath me, I slowly, painstakingly got up using one free hand, the other one keeping track of my eagerly bleeding wound. Not one time did I take my stare away from my father, keeping it fixed directly upon his movement.

"That was a nice show you put on there…," Lukas said darkly, "but all for nothing?"

I spat blood at him in response. Yumi turned her head swiftly around to see me barely standing without help, and panic settled into her throat, bursting into her speech.

"Reese, what are you _doing_?" She cried powerlessly. My father's angry death stare fixated on her, and all too well did I know what was going to happen next. With the last bits of my strength, I powered up my legs and leaped in between them.

Multiple things happened in one second. My father raised his gun to my head while Yumi yelped out a very clear 'no.' As I glanced at the two girls to make sure they were okay, I realized that not only was the courtyard still empty, but now the vending machines pretty much were as well, except for Nevaeh and Yumi. My thoughts flashed to Xana as my torso burned with excruciating sting from the gunshot. Lukas put his finger on the trigger, ready to fire regardless if I was in the way or not.

And then we were all enveloped in a blinding white globe of light, and everything was sent back into a sleepless coma.

DETERMINATION: Also could be seen as stubbornness, but who's counting?

Jeremy is, at least.

Kiwi was thrown up in a fly as my legs kicked high into the air with the sheets, my chest pounding so hard I thought that my heart was going to burst out of my sternum any moment now. I sat up so quickly that the chemicals in my brain threw me off balance and I swayed, nearly knocking the wall with my head. I caught a wild scream just before it split my lips, making me cough multiple edgy times to make sure it stayed down. Kiwi growled and nipped at my feet, angry that he had been rudely awakened so badly in the middle of the night. The dog's attempted injuries were the last thing on my mind, though, and if I had to spell out why for you I might as well just stop right here and now.

If Odd was awake he sure did a fantastic job of hiding it. I didn't even pause long enough to get dressed save for throwing my jacket on over my sleeping tank-top with also the bonus of my green striped cotton pajama pants. Not even shoes were put on my feet.

I took enough time and sense to glance at the clock, which shone a red 0:01 for me to clearly read. I smirked passively, and grabbed my cell phone before slipping out into the dimly lit hallway.

Flipping the phone open, I quickly tapped up Aelita's re-entered cell phone number, sending her a very quick text message. She didn't reply immediately, and I didn't really expect her to.

At the end of the boy's hallway I quietly creaked the door open, gingerly shutting it behind me. Before I could stutter a hello, Aelita swiftly grabbed my hand and led me down the stairs to the outside.

Well now. So much for the phone.

Her hair was slightly tussled from sleep, as well as it being down, loosely hanging about her shoulder blades. She had a short pink nightshirt on, with cute white sleep shorts that hung halfway down her thighs. She was silent and slightly clumsy, but ever so shocked into being awake that I dared not help or question her as she walked by moonlight in her sandals to the aspen. As we got there she took in some deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. She faced me tenderly, concern seeping from her eyes to mine. As she struggled to find a word to start, she glanced downwards.

"You're not wearing any shoes…!" She exclaimed in a hushed tone, staring up at me in motherly wonder, "Ulrich—," Aelita began, sounding just like a mother as well. I'm sure it took her mind off of what she was going to say, but heck, we didn't have time for that.

"I'm quite sure that going barefoot is the least of our problems, Aelita," I chided before she could go on, "We both saw what happened, and how quickly and horribly it went. Tell me your end first,"

Aelita shifted her feet and told me all the things that I didn't quite see at first.

"Jeremy, Odd and I, well, as soon as Yumi and Nevaeh were dragged out, well, we started to finally understand the extent of this attack. Jeremy made a note on why the courtyard was deserted—I think he recalled that there was an auditorium presentation at just that right moment. And then, you…fell to the ground, screaming. I, I er…Odd jumped a bit, and through the shocked silence, he gathered enough sense within him to pull us away to the factory while the getting was good. If he didn't say that then, I'm not sure what would've happened…,

"Jeremy wasn't even reluctant at the idea of taking a return trip. The only thing he warned was that of course it'd make Xana stronger, and that we couldn't keep making return trips until we got this right. Despite that, it took him no time to pull up the program at all…,"

As she finished, I launched into my half of the story that she missed without even thinking twice.

"No time at all, right. He could've done it before Yumi got sliced in the side and I got shot through the abdomen, you know,"

Aelita drew in a sharp breath through her teeth, frightened. I shook my head.

"He's real, princess. A dragon with his own lair on his back wherever he goes. Thank God Nevaeh wasn't hurt, but at that exact moment the return trip got to us he had the gun pointed at my head…,"

"No," Aelita interrupted as soon as I drifted off, "No, no, stop. I don't want to hear it. Ohhhhh…," Woozily she wobbled from side to side before she steadied herself against the aspen, gratefully accepting my help as I guided her down to the ground so she could sit. It took her a couple of breaths of oxygen before she was okay again.

"Sorry," I murmured a little darkly, "I'm just a little…,"

"Sh-Shaken up?" Aelita finished, agreeing with me that we all were. I let out some air as I confirmed it, and laid my back against the aspen next to her.

"I can't believe that…," she began, choking on her words. I shushed her lightly, holding back my own current fears for her sake.

"No one can…I just wish…," I muttered, feeling utterly weak against this. I sighed, "I just wish I could do something…anything. If only we could make this different…,"

An oppressive stillness smothered us as we sat there, knowing what was to come but completely blank on what could be done to fix—or prevent—it. Aelita murmured a few sleepy groans, resting her head in her arms and rolling it around, hoping to find a kind of idea that would be able to help us.

"I could…I could ask Yumi about her sword…," she said lowly.

"What?" I questioned, a little overwhelmed by my sudden tiredness. Aelita hummed sleepily and explained for me.

"She could bring her sword later in the day, say, in the evening. At least we'll have that…," I twisted my mouth in contemplation. Out of habit, my jaw crooked to the side as well as I tried to focus my sticky eyes onto a new fern leaf growing out of the ground.

"Yeah, it would help, but it wouldn't really do much…Haven't you ever heard of 'Don't bring a sword to a gunfight?'" I downgraded. Aelita shrugged.

"You fought with a sword on Lyoko, that was pretty much all gunfights," she pointed out. I felt a mite sheepish, but wasn't ready to be beaten by that.

"That's different," I protested, "That was virtual life with easy to deflect lasers on a video-game world. This is…this is real life, Aelita,"

Real life. How I wished it was virtual.

Of course Aelita knew that from the start, but the forced knowledge of it made her sigh sickly, knowing I was right.

"Well, what else could we do? We're a little more prepared for it because we know, sure, but what else…?"

I began to nibble on a thumbnail, trying to keep myself half-awake, "Well…there's always the faculty…but I…don't really want to go through all of that. I mean, with my false identity, my sister, my father, you guys, all the others…parent-teacher conferences…I…I don't know. The police aren't here to bodyguard, they just show up when something goes wrong…," I muttered sadly. Aelita let out a slightly pissed gripe as she angrily replied.

"Well, that's stupid. Incredibly stupid. Something _has_ gone wrong and we _know_ it's going to happen—only, crap, we can't tell how, and if we do _we're_ the ones that they're going to lock up! Oh, Oh Ulrich this is a mess! A godforsaken _mess_!"

"Stole the words right out of my mouth…," I drifted, my gaze wandering up to the budded branches to the night sky above. A few moments passed where Aelita tried to get a grip on what was going to happen and where I desperately thought of ways to better the situation. Nothing blinked in my head.

After what seemed like hours, Aelita finally spoke again, softly and with heavy breaths.

"I'm tired. And cold. Hummmm…is there really nothing we can do?" she asked just one more time. I slowly shook my head, devastated to believe it, but compelled to nonetheless. Aelita stood up.

"Come with me back to the dorm—at least try to sleep. We all need it for the upcoming…disaster,"

I stood up with her, making a final decision. She took a few steps before she turned around and looked at me, expectant. I jumped upon my chance.

"Aelita…if, if anything wrong happens…and Nevaeh comes out…you know, unharmed, and I…," I swallowed a gulp, and Aelita shut her eyes to reflect a flinch, "Well, um…what I'm saying is…if that does happen, would you take care of her for me…? F-For the both of them, Nevaeh and…,"

Aelita softly mouthed our friend's name, and looked off to the side, biting her lower lip to dam the undoubted tears that were edging to come out. She then looked at me, trying to desperately tell herself that everything would be okay somehow.

"That's a…low chance that it would happen…right?" she asked, trying to confirm something.

I didn't answer.

She inhaled a huge breath through her mouth shakily, trembling as she did so. Smoothly she exhaled through her nose, trying to force images and scenarios from her mind.

"yes. I swear I will, I promise," she said slowly, nothing but pure truth ringing from her words. I gave a small, but overly gracious thank you, and accompanied her back to our dorms, where we tried to sleep but failed miserably.

Failed.

Like I feel I have.

RIGHTEOUS: A strong will of the heart for the good of all.

Strong is the will with Yumi.

No books. Little talk. Simply people-watching as they slowly made their way to the auditorium, totally oblivious to the calamity they were about to sorely miss for the worse. I stood within the group of four Lyoko Warriors as I edgily anticipated the arrival of a flaming meteor. Yumi was almost strangling my poor sword as she stood there, hugging herself and staring into the deepest depths of space, more than likely reliving the dangers of last night in her brain. After the longest time of not speaking at all—and a record of eternity for not showing any audible care for me—she spoke in a quiet, trembling and slightly scared voice.

"Reese…," she puttered, her eyes still unfocused even though she was heavily concentrating on her words, "If…anything happens recently…can you at least say that—," she paused suddenly, trying to hide her shaky intake of air, "that you wouldn't do anything stupid?"

I hid my flashed smirk, and gave her a quizzical look. She shook her head, and hugged herself tighter. Timing everything right, I glanced over at the gatehouse.

On meeting gazes, I gave her the saddest, most apologetic look I could muster, and tried to fight back the stinging tears in my eyes. Finally I had to tear my sight away, giving Aelita the sign to move inward. We did, and by the time we were inside of the vending shack, everyone else mingling outside in the courtyard was locked safely within the auditorium.

And from that point on we were on our own, stuck in reality's fast-paced death grip. There was nothing we could possibly do but play out our parts as the rightful Shakespeare actors that we were in this winding tragedy of my life.

It went hauntingly similar to the last time, in fact, I wanted to scratch my eyes out it went according to yesterday so well. Before I knew it, Yumi had a gun pointed at her head, Nevaeh a knife to the chin, and I was out in the courtyard without the sword.

Goddammit. I wasn't able to pick it up through the blinding rage at my father's abusive tendencies, and everything happened so fast that I was knocked aside before I could do anything, and Yumi was captured with the sword shaken off within a heartbeat. I felt like screaming. The sword had done nothing. I refused help once again. I was standing here, my father was once again spelling it out for me.

You're a failure.

Nothing but a failure.

And though you're rock bottom, you're still able to drill farther down with my help.

With this, you'll only do one thing more in your life:

Fail.

I had to choose once again.

Nevaeh or Yumi.

Yumi or Nevaeh.

My sister or my love.

My knees hit the craggy ground, sharp rocks cutting past the fabric of my pants. I felt the sick sensation of my fingers tearing at my face as my scream once again chillingly rippled through the evening with not a helpful soul to hear it. Yumi was crying after she couldn't hold back anymore, and Nevaeh was so silent she was scaring me. The damaging hands of mine fell to the ground as before, powerless and pathetic. Yumi squirmed, earning a cold barrel shoved farther into her skin. Nevaeh did nothing.

Nothing. She did nothing.

Aelita and Odd were still there, Jeremy, I don't know—probably escaping to the factory alone.

And nothing happened. No one did anything, not before Aelita burst without warning.

"What…What are you doing?! Are you just going to sit there? Look at yourself! It's no wonder people _think_ you're a failure, if you just sit there and do _nothing!_ Lives are on a thin wire here! Reese—curse you Reese! Get up! _Get…up!_" she screamed. My father's attention turned to her, but he surprisingly did nothing. Fueled by this for confidence, Aelita boldly continued, gripping the sword in her hands as her voice got angrier and more desperate as she went on.

"You've got legs, don't you? Get up! I swear, Reese Anders, get up! Get up or I'll…I'll…," She gritted her teeth and twisted at the sheath, "I'll dump you!!" she blurted clumsily.

Nobody but me knew the true purpose of that. She wasn't my girlfriend, but that threat came merely to lighten my spirits—bring me back to the real world with a shock of humor. And boy did it ever.

My eyes blinked multiple times, suddenly more aware and awake. She'll _dump_ me? Oh that's classic, Aelita!

She suddenly let out a most frustrated howl of rage as tears of hopelessness dotted her eyes for real, and she did one of the most helpful things she could've ever done to clear up this situation.

Seemingly out of her bombardment of anger, she took a few steps forward, building up the right amount of momentum, and hurled the sword at me, the thing smacking my shoulder not unkindly and landing near me at a diagonal direction, the sword released from the hilt by quite a few centimeters. Wow. She really does throw like a girl. I don't say that in a mean way, either. That stung! Aelita took in a few breaths, crying full blast now, and stepped back, hoping, just praying that she did the right thing.

The blade reflected the early moonlight and the last few rays of the sunset with such a perfection that even a King's mirror would be jealous of. The blade was well-cared for, in both physical and spiritual ways. There was a aura of honor to it, as well as memories that cast shadows of sadness, hope, and joy all at the same time, building up the instinct to draw the sword for more than the reason to harm or kill—but for the reason to release the memories, let them run wild up and down the shining blade, making it shine and twinkle with proud courage. Draw the blade and let the emotions flow from the blade to your arm to your heart, swelling up your faith and gallantry to the point of brave insanity. But it was a good insanity. A calm type of insanity. A warrior's insanity.

I hadn't felt that for so long. The warrior's insanity—I needed it. It must've become a long lost addiction of mine. That sword, it was mine. It was cared for when I was gone, cared for and cried over, ultimately waiting for my return.

Now I have returned. The insanity had been restored inside of me, and I was ready to let loose. Dare challenge me now, I have the comfort of my memories to hold me up. It won't matter if you killed me—my thoughts, my friends, my memories will forever live on in this sword, in the story of my Warrior's Insanity, adding to the legendary fables of the entire Warrior's Insanity in the world.

Face me now.

I am restored.

Nevaeh finally, finally took her chance. My father screamed in agony and reared back. Yumi screamed to run, Aelita crouched down with her arms open, beckoning to her.

"Run to me, Nevaeh! Run to me!"

"Run, go to Aelita, ruuuun!"

_Run, little sister…_I followed in my head. _Run, little girl…this is my battle, and my battle alone_.

Yumi lost her timing and struggled against my father, and to both of our horror's she was unable to break free. My father in turn twisted the gun so hard into her forehead that she had to bite back a very sharp cry as a thin line of blood trickled down the side of her face. He continued to chide me, his tone dark and devious.

"That's the choice made for you…," he seethed, "Any last objections before we…follow through?" he added with an ill sort of metaphor. I didn't say anything, but just sat there. Aelita drew in sharp breaths, worried that her ploy hadn't worked. Yumi shut her eyes and began to mouth a few vows or prayers in Japanese. Time became a statue, waiting for me and for me alone. My father shrugged.

"Well then, if that's how you are…,"

Yumi whimpered as he pulled the gun slightly away, lowering it to her neck like last time, the barrel grazing her skin ever so lightly in a bastardly seductive way.

Enough for me.

Boiling oil seethed in my veins, and the cool hilt of the sword became gripped in my gloved hand, the familiar sensation buzzing up my arm and relaxing my nerves for whatever came next. A smooth, delicious sound of metal scraping against a sheath sliced the sky as I stood up, the glittering blade and the frosty gun demonically waiting.

Reunited after so long, with the Warrior's Insanity pumping hot blood through my body.

Damn, it was the most perfect feeling ever.

Bring your worst, daddy.

My father sniffed and adjusted the gun, clicking back the safety.

"Wait," I said, grabbing his curious attention. He cocked another Spock eyebrow as I gathered up my reasons.

"I'm…sorry about disappointing you, really. I always knew what the…Japs were," I choked out, hoping he didn't notice the contempt of saying that word in my voice. Yumi gave an immense flinch. I avoided eye contact.

"It was just a…act," I confessed. I felt the anger of betrayal bubble up in Yumi's blood from where I stood as I continued, "If I may have the honors?" I asked emotionlessly, gesturing with my sword vaguely in Yumi's direction. A smirk very similar to mine spread on my father's face, and to my ultimate relief, the gun was lowered from her neck, swiftly pocketed away. Yumi could've used this opportunity to break away, but she was too busy standing proud in her spot despite the language used, staring at me with nothing but narrowed eyes, somehow saying that I hadn't taken away her honor or her pride, and that her anger was repressed to hide her betrayed feelings. Her spine was straight and rigid as she stood tall against all odds, staring me down with silent tears crawling down her face, emphasizing her defiance.

I'm so sorry, Yumi.

Lukas grabbed a hold of her upper arms and squeezed, making sure she wasn't going anywhere. She twitched and a sneer blinked on her face, ready to go down screaming a war cry. In fact, she looked totally ready to go down and wouldn't for the world try to break away from this honorable death.

These thoughts in mind, I slowly advanced. Odd jerked forward, only to be stopped by Aelita's hand and her pleading gaze, silently telling him that she knew that everything would turn out okay. Odd looked dashingly reluctant, but Aelita backed up her strength as she grasped Nevaeh's shoulder tighter. The space between me and Yumi closed so we were only a half an arm's length apart. Not looking at my father in fear of my eyes giving myself away, I raised the sword at an angle to my collarbone, and took a few more steps to shut the gap.

Yumi lifted her chin away from the chilled metal as the sharp side of it left nothing but a thin layer of air between it and her skin. The blade was placed so the hilt was near her neck, the sword extending out to the space in between my father's shoulder and his head. Finally I locked gazes with her, sliding in so my body was nearly pressed to hers, the sword separating us. I never left her eyes, fully allowing the advent of a soul gaze to happen.

I'm not sure what she saw in my eyes, but I knew what I first saw in her deep sea of chocolate.

Anger. Betrayal. Hatred. Pride. Honor. Strength. Fire.

And then the soul gaze was taken deeper in, and I saw things I'm sure she'd never show under the toll of death. I saw them, and it pained me to know that this was her real self that she had hidden behind the other blanket.

Grief. Desperation. Loss. Breakdown. Weakness. Need. Broken. Lost. Afraid. Alone. Ice.

Bolts of lightning struck me as I gazed into her, suddenly making me hate myself even more than before. Why was she feeling these things? Why?

Because of me.

God…God damn…

I restrained my anger, or rather, I let it flow to the right place—the sword. I focused all of my rage down into my arm so it rang through the metal, and I pressed the sharp edge into Yumi's soft, warm neck, following through and pressing my body against hers, feeling her warmth against me. My unscarred cheek grazed her hair to one side, and I inhaled deeply, taking in her gentle yet firm scent. I closed my eyes, letting myself relax to her calming scent. Yumi grasped a breath and held it in. Lukas might've started to get the real idea what was going on, and one of his arms released Yumi to reach back into his pocket.

Things that were slow-moving before suddenly jerked into super sonic speed with one smooth, skilled movement of the blade. A flick of the wrist, and most of the flat part of the sword was now against Yumi's skin, and with no hesitation whatsoever, the angle was changed and then cruelly drawn across in a slick line, gliding across air. Yumi shivered in a daze as the touch of death skipped across her, leaving her unharmed. My father jerked and yelled in surprise as that same touch didn't exactly skip across him.

With the sword partly bloodied from my father's now cut shoulder, I hastily grabbed Yumi around the waist, jolting her from her death-transfixed state as I jumped back with her in one arm. My father's pained scream quickly transitioned to one of seething rage. I swept the sword back into action and slashed across the other way this time, catching his gun arm and part of his stomach. He didn't react, simply dropped the gun on the ground in front of him as the pain seared up his arm. They weren't deep cuts, but I sure bet my entire budget that they stun like crazy.

My blood pumped like wildfire in me, gleeful that it was finally being released with such joy. Yumi uttered shocked murmurs beside me as we quickly stepped backward, away from Lukas. I didn't let go of her until we were back to where I originally started, and I was sure that she was capable of standing on her own. Only then did I slowly unwrap my arm from around her, never taking my gaze away from my father.

The Warrior's Insanity simmered down unexpectedly, conquered by something else entirely—something that truly scared me deep down. I didn't know the name for it then, but I clearly recognize it now.

Hatred.

Pure, unsettled, ancient hatred.

My voice came out unfamiliar to me, as a smooth, snarling wolfish command as dark as my dreams themselves. It was then I realized that this was my nightmare speaking out from the confinement of dreams.

"Yumi. Get. Out."

Yumi shivered and moaned weakly.

"_Out_." I demanded. She flinched and began to slowly creep back to the vending machines. My father's eyes burned as he pulled the gun out. In a flash of moonlight, the sword lashed out in front of Yumi, making her stop short in surprise. I glared through my father, daring him to go on.

"Go on. Try and shoot. I'll kill you if you so much as aim," I warned.

And I meant it, too.

Lukas looked as though he was about to shoot no question, but for some strange reason, he lowered the gun, safety still on. Keeping my eyes on that hand, I flicked the sword as a signal to keep going on. Yumi was a little unsure at first, but then she stiffly walked to the sides of Odd and Aelita.

After that, it was a complete stare down between me and my father. No words were exchanged, and it was so barren that I seriously considered tumbleweed to appear any second now. That was the only slightly sane thing that was running through my mind though.

Everything else was focused on the past. My recent past. Take like, the last two years. I know it's awful to say it, but one emotion filled me while thinking of the past. One emotion and one only.

Fury.

All directed at one man. I'm not going to spell out who. Aelita must've sensed what was going on, because she began to stutter mangled sounds, unable to build up words. What could she say, anyways? There was no stopping me now.

_Don't bring a sword to a gunfight._

This isn't a gunfight anymore.

I proved that as with a howling screech of unexplained rage split my lips, and the sword went spinning in the air. My father flinched and stepped back. He didn't need to; I didn't aim directly at him. The blade went screaming past his ear, landing sharp end down in the dirt not far off from him. Lukas was partially bent over to try and feebly protect himself. There was no protecting himself now.

My body moved without my brain's consent. In fact, I think every last bit of my gray matter was shut down, as my body was now functioning on full hate-fuel. Animalistic instinct and anger burned my muscles, pumping to every last millimeter of me, not leaving a spot untouched of hate.

I bowled into Lukas, teeth bared and limbs flailing, tearing, clawing, kicking, and punching everywhere. It was half madness, but there was method in it as I struck his stomach, grabbed his gun hand tightly, bringing it up to the side of his face. My knee went into his abdomen, followed through with a vicious jab to the head. Before I knew it, the gun was pried from his hand by the barrel, and I stood back for half a second, allowing myself to dive in once more, brutally torpedoing him in such a way that the force of the impact drove us both down onto the ground. My dad's head did a fancy whip lash from the ground, and I took no hesitation of his shock, pinning him down with straddled legs and a palm heel at the shoulder.

Somehow, somehow through the blind red mist that had settled over my eyes, somehow my hand had followed through with the gun, and I now held it at the trigger instead of the barrel, and suddenly the business end of the gun was cruelly dug into my father's forehead, the bullet inside of it itching to be shot.

* * *

Always stay on the Bright Side of Death!

Dee doo! Dee doo dee doo dee doo!

Anyone who recognizes that gets a free sketch from meeeeeee. (kitteh face)

(kitteh face...HUGGERS. ACK!)


	16. PAUSE

I know it's been a while. You'll have to forgive me because my parents restricted computer use until the end of the school year. Which ended yesterday. 8D

I've actually had chapter 16 completed for about a week and a half now, I just needed to monotonously type it onto the computer. My friend read the nightmare part out loud from my awful handwriting. It's because of her that when it becomes the nightmare I laugh out loud so much. She made this chapter absolutely hilarious. I'm sorry.

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen: PAUSE**

_Sedate the Wolf, Awake the Lion_

If I thought I knew silence before, well, in reality silence was just a stranger to me—even after being basically selectively silent for oh, two and a half years. What was going on now was true, pure, silence. The only thing I heard was the heavy sound of my breathing and the blood pumping in my temples. Nothing else stirred. Red mist settled over my eyesight with sick hunger for one thing:

Blood.

My father's face was blank with the sensation of blinking fear on his face, until it was slowly split with a smile that would make the Grinch even greener with envy. I could clearly see his canines pointing in opposite directions as time ran still, holding us there. My finger twitched on the trigger of the gun.

I wanted to shoot.

End this all. Make me forget the pain. Stop the headlines. Keep my friends safe. Preserve Nevaeh from harm. Kill Reese. Return as Ulrich.

Erase my past.

The courtyard was full of two things: the light of evening darkness, and the sound of complete silence. My father's chest began to tremor with stocked up laughter, starting low, then working its way up to a chuckle, mocking me in my face.

"Shoot," he tempted me, "Go on, boy. Shoot. Do yourself a favor, and get put on the front page tomorrow,"

My eyes felt as though they were going to either burn out of my sockets or burst out of them. I readjusted the gun, digging into his skin further. The metal that touched my had seemed to pulsate on its own with eager glee.

_Shoot. Shoot him. He's the one who started this mess. He's the reason why Yumi hates you. He's the one. He killed your mother. He beat your sister. He pulled a weapon on Yumi and Nevaeh both. Shoot him. Become a hero. Rid the town of this devil._

"Fuck you," I growled, "Fuck…you,"

I shifted my hand on the handle, and pressed one finger to the trigger. My heart became Godzilla's as the pounding rush swamped my head, the adrenaline burst urging me to squeeze the gun.

This was the moment. I was going to finally end this. So…very…close…

"Reese! Reese, no, wait!"

I had guessed someone would say something. I was guessing that Aelita was going to interject. But the only reason I stopped was because this wasn't Aelita.

No, it was Yumi that was defending him.

I blinked a few times, and the blood-thirsty mist that had covered my eyes before began to lift. My father's chuckle raised a notch in volume.

"Come now, are you really going to listen to _her_?" He taunted. I didn't understand. He _wanted_ to lose his life? Well then, so be it!

"Reese…! Don't! You don't want to do this!" Yumi continued.

I don't? Hell, girl, you don't know what I've been through! This man—no, this…this _thing_, he ruined my entire life! Killed my mother! Scarred my body! Beat my innocent sister! There was no friggin' way that I was going to…

_Wait,_ a side of me argued. _Listen to her. Gather your senses. What are you doing?_

I shook my head. Kill him. I needed to shoot him. I wanted my pain to end, and he was the very source of my pain.

_He wants you to shoot him._

Whoopdie-friggin'-doo, makes it all the more easier.

_Think about it, idiot! Why does he want you to shoot?!_

My father's smile lessened a tad as he noticed that I was now struggling with my decision.

"Why do you listen to her? Aren't I the one you put all the blame on? Why are you here now? Isn't it because of me? Shoot boy, make Daddy proud. Now's the time that you'll become a man,"

"No…," Yumi hoarsely whispered, "Not like this…,"

_He wants you to shoot…so you'll be kept in custody. Prison. Jail. Whatever you want to call it. You won't just be separated from your loves and friends for two years—this time, it'll be forever._

Lukas glared from between the barrel of the gun, suddenly impatient.

"Squeeze the trigger boy. End your sorrow. Do it. I would've. Like father, like son,"

_Forever._

That last statement. 'Like father, like son.' That's what finally lifted the entirety of the red curtain from my eyes. That's the statement that brought me to my horrid senses. I was holding the gun against my father's head. I was ready to shoot.

I was ready to screw up my entire life for forevermore.

_Society will look down on you. Hate you. Everyone will. No comfort, no smiles, nothing. Nothing to keep you company for the rest of your eternity._

My jaw opened in a strangled cry as the hand with the gun noticeably shuddered uncontrollably. Lukas's eyes blazed with fury.

"You listened to her," he sneered.

"No…," I gasped, "I listened to _you_,"

To this, I'm sure everyone was confused. But my meaning was seen soon enough. With another cry the gun was flung aside into the mass darkness of the trees. I began to tremble.

"Like father like son…," I quoted with detestation. My eyes fixated onto him as tears began to stream down, my teeth gritted with anger at my severe close call. Finally, finally I said the words that forever switched my path, from that of destruction—which was what the gun would've done—to one of hope.

"I am not—and never will be—like you,"

_Forever_.

My father's gaze narrowed, "You'd disobey your own father to a Jap?"

My response was still breathy from before.

"You're not my father. Not anymore,"

Lukas's eyes screamed with a sort of rage that only comes when someone has not gotten their way when they really wanted it. Blurring mind, my muscles became weak from the withdrawal of adrenaline, and I was a mere hapless obstacle in Lukas's way. No sooner did my body decide to relax was I thrown off of him, my back sliding on the gravel courtyard. I made no sound.

The force of the hit made my senses clear up just enough to catch a moment of peril about to descend upon me. Yumi stifled a scream, and Aelita whined through her lip, grasping Nevaeh tightly. Odd choked.

The shining switchblade stopped centimeters away from my nose, instantly drawing out sweat from my forehead. Tides had turned, with Lukas now straddled on top of me, his knife hand trembling and edging to reach me, while both of my hands did all they could to stop just one of his. A thick grimace of exertion appeared on my face, excess saliva crawling down my jaw. My eyes instantly crossed to the blade then un-crossed to watch Lukas carefully and angrily. His eyes looked as though they were ready to bulge out of his sockets as veins popped on his temples. Red splashed on his cheeks, from probably two things: One, the effort of fighting against me, and two, the raging hatred that was clearly plastered in his dark eyes and creased face. The only movement that was allowed was the shivering of our muscles as we worked against each other, and the occasional jerk of movement to try and better the other. It seemed to be evenly matched, but Lukas was stronger than I thought. My arms bulged with all of the strength I had, but I could tell it wasn't doing any good. I was losing, and losing all too quickly.

The switchblade dropped lower and lower, pricking the tip of my nose so a tiny bead of blood swelled on it, making my eyes cross again to watch it. Being the underdog wasn't so great, because he had the advantage of weight on me as well as the first strike. I felt my strength loosen on the hold of his hands, and I felt his begin to slip in a downwards motion when we were abruptly interrupted.

"Bombs away, baconators!!" Odd screamed as he literally flew into my captor, body-slamming him so he rolled all the way aside, the blade falling with him. I gasped as the pressure was released from my body and rolled away, panting and coughing. Odd stumbled back and nearly tripped over my legs. He kept a short eye on Lukas before he offered a hand down to me.

"Here, come on, get up. We'll take you to someplace safe,"

On my stomach, I looked up at him, hope, confusion, and desperation glimmering in my eyes. He glanced up at Lukas, then down at me again, more urgent this time.

"Come on, buddy, you can do it! Just take my hand!"

Buddy.

He called me buddy.

We were buddies once more.

Uneasily I placed my shaking hand within his and he helped to pull me up. Almost instantly after that we belted back to the vending machines, where the girls were just about ready to split with us, Nevaeh riding piggy back on Aelita. We were so close to them, and we were all ready to sprint off when Odd yelped in surprised pain. I skidded to a stop right before I could think and swiveled around to see Odd limp up, a dribble of blood spurting from the back of his calf. I choked on my breath.

Lukas jogged up behind Odd, cruelly ripping the knife out from his leg. Odd gave a dog-like whine and collapsed on the ground, hugging his wounded calf close. It was a deep stab, and Odd was only lucky that he threw it into the leg and not somewhere incredibly vital.

A growl rippled in my throat, and I widened my stance, digging my feet into the ground. Lukas brought the glistening red knife in front of him and into my view. Yumi and Aelita paused behind me, both of them stricken stiff.

"Odd!" Yumi screeched, her voice cracking with panic. Aelita breathily began to whisper to me.

"Reese, forget him, he'll be fine, trust me…he'll be fine, just go, just leave with us, come on Reese…,"

"Bullshit," I spat, "Not after what just happened here,"

Lukas narrowed his eyes, keeping silent for the time being. He approached one step at a time. I was tempted to lunge at him, but that would be an incredibly stupid last move. Once again there ensued a stare down between me and him, only this time with a wounded Odd moaning in the background. It must've lasted about a minute before Aelita gave a shocked gasp.

"No—wait!" she warned, just a bit too late. Yumi leaped up and caught the culprit just at the right time before she, Nevaeh, got too far in the way. My attention was caught down for a moment as I looked to Nevaeh to see her face cutely scrunched up in a toddler fury, her fists rolling forward, willing to have a shot at Lukas. In a different situation, I would've laughed.

"Nevaeh, please no! Go back!" I pleaded as Yumi slowly but surely pulled my sister away. But I shouldn't have said that. I shouldn't have looked away. I shouldn't have looked down at her. I should've been paying attention more carefully. Oh God, I should've been paying more attention.

"Reese, buddy, look out!!" Odd painfully called. I looked back to Lukas only a second later than should've been.

The next thing I knew, the hilt of his knife had smashed itself in between my eyes. Colors exploded in an acidic mosaic right in front of me, and all sense of direction and location were lost in the utter dizziness. Unwillingly my body crumpled underneath me to the shouts of four people. A blow to my stomach with a sharp shoe was made, and I stayed down. Multiple screams (or was it one?) filled the air, most of them extremely young. There was a protest, then a silencing. Another scream, this time by Aelita I think, it was too hard to tell. My vision blurred back as I lay there, looking at Lukas's feet. He was walking out of Kadic, that much was certain. Odd snarled at him like an angry cat and leapt for his legs, latching onto them and trying to delay him. Lukas made no distinction and merely kicked him away, shoving an extra hit into his chest to keep him laying there. Odd scrunched his face closed and rolled about, clutching his chest and trying to gasp for air.

I moaned and tried to stand up, but none of my limbs could fully work properly. Lukas turned slightly back to me and sniffed. When I did I noticed he was dragging a struggling figure.

A small, babyish, struggling figure.

If a snarl could appear on my lips, it would've. But my head hurt. Black and blue with purple danced around the corners my vision, confusing me. I think I uttered some sort of war cry before my father met me again, shoving me forward and viciously knocking my head against the metal corner of the vending shed. I heard one last thing before the black enveloped me in a savage dreamless coma.

"Bruggerrrr, noooooooo!"

CONFUSION: No se habla ingles, Señor. Lo siento.

No comprendo los oddballes.

Sound, I could hear it. I think someone—or a few people—were talking. I took it to still be dark, and I was most likely outside still—the early spring air was a little vile in its own way. My body rippled with a shiver as I tried to move my limbs. One of them let out a worried sort of hum and placed a hand on me, I think it was my chest. Her voice, even though it was a whisper, was close to me. I imagined that she had leaned down next to my ear as she talked in a shattered, soothing voice.

"Don't move…you're, uh, not quite ready to do anything yet,"

I gave a disgruntled moan and shifted once again. The girl let out a breath through her nose, and called for the other to come help.

"Yumi, would you help me prop him up against the wall here?" She, Aelita I think, asked. Yumi gave what sounded like a reluctant 'okay' and walked over, grabbing my shoulder and waist. She told Aelita to do the same, and I was ungainly lifted so I was sitting up. My eyes twitched a bit, hurting with every movement I made. Yumi murmured something about going back to Odd, then quickly walked off.

Aelita gave a troubled purr as she crouched beside me, whispering in my ear.

"Are you okay? You kinda got…beaten up a bit there,"

A grunt escaped me. I'm not sure what that was supposed to mean.

"Um, we all got out pretty much fine…except for Odd…I think Yumi says that the knife might've fractured something in his leg,"

Wincing, I rolled my head to and fro once, finding that the back of it throbbed immensely with pain. Aelita placed a hand on my shoulder.

"I…didn't call for a past trip…you know…I kinda figured—hoped, actually, that we didn't need one…,"

My eyes slowly opened, revealing a mushy vision consisting of bluish darkness. A couple meters ahead, slightly to my right was Yumi as she leaned over a laying Odd. Odd's head was facing me, and every now and then his back would buck, exposing a face of utter pain as Yumi tried to do something to his leg. This happened a few times before Yumi must've muttered an okay, to which Odd released a very grateful, very relieved, and very huge sigh, followed by a few pants of exertion. Yumi got up and stalked over to Aelita, walking a little wobbly. Aelita stood up as she approached, conversing with her.

"That leg of his is pretty bad…I tied it up with some cloth, but he needs a hospital. There's definitely a fracture in there somewhere," There was a pause as they both stood, uneasy. Yumi was swaying just a little bit, to which my mind jumped upon the possibility that she must've been knocked out as well. Aelita seemed to be doing fine, meaning that she was most likely left alone. Yumi picked the conversation back up, referring to me without gesturing, "How's he doing?"

"I think he's fine. There's a bit of a blood from his forehead, but the back is fine. He might have a bruise though. He's not speaking, but he is responding to some of my questions,"

"His eyes are open…," Yumi noted. Aelita shifted her weight in agreement.

"The only thing now," Aelita said, "is to see if he remembers…," she didn't finish her sentence. Yumi gave a grave gurgle.

"If he doesn't, I'm not going to be the one to tell him that…that…,"

_That what?_ My mind thought. Suddenly I wanted the memories to flood back to me, and I frantically began sifting through whatever part of my brain that I could, searching for what had supposedly just happened. Lots of things flew by me, most of them about Nevaeh. It confused me, but when I saw her face in my mind, I felt sad and uncertain. Confused, I continued looking for different thoughts, when I heard her voice in my mind, and I stopped my excavation. I didn't want the vision to be replayed. Not now. Not this way.

All I needed was a record of Nevaeh screaming for me, crying out 'no' right afterwards.

That's all it would ever take to make my world fall apart at the very seams.

She was gone.

"Nuh…Nuh…Nuh…," I mumbled, my eyes stinging and burning with an emotional fire. Aelita and Yumi both turned to me, the former kneeling down.

"Reese…?" she asked tentatively. My mouth opened for gritted teeth as the hot emotional fire, tears, exploded from my eyes.

"_NEVAAAEHHHH!!_"

SANCTUARY: There when you need it to protect you from evil

Calling sanctuary for Aelita

I stood there silently with Yumi and Aelita, watching as the flashing red and white lights flared off into the night, the siren's wail piercing our ears with a screeching reminder of what had happened not too long ago. Tears still rolled down my eyes, though not with sound or expression, and with a slow rhythm. My face felt like a wagon had been drawn over it; the ruts were the places of the twin trails of tears that had almost permanently marked my face. The girls hadn't said anything to me after I had broken down and screamed, though it wasn't like they were avoiding me either. They just had nothing to say.

The auditorium had been let out curiously as the ambulance drove up, each person scared and shocked to find out what had happened. It pained me too much to tell them, so Yumi, Aelita, and even Odd told parts of the story, thankfully leaving out a point of insanity on my part with the gun. The teachers had gone a little bit berserk, but after a while they calmed down enough to take some action. Nurse Yolanda gave me a quick band-aid for my forehead, handing both Yumi and I a painkiller for our headaches. (Yumi, by the way, had been knocked back into the foliage, Aelita being shoved to the side. Yumi was knocked out as she ran into a tree, and Aelita was terrified stiff as Lukas dragged my sister off. Aelita escaped with nothing but a hurt shoulder.) As of now, most everyone was gone from the courtyard again, the teachers to either their beds or their offices, where they would call different government agencies for the report of a kidnapping. All of the students (except for us, who were granted permission to see Odd off) had been herded to bed, while all of the parents drove silently home.

Jeremy jogged up as the ambulance left, clutching his laptop. Aelita explained the story to him, with Yumi adding in little details on the sidelines. This time they didn't leave out the incident with me and the gun. When they were finished Jeremy took off his glasses and rubbed them against his shirt, putting them back on again.

"So then…Nevaeh was…,"

Aelita and Yumi nodded slowly. I simply stayed where I was, staring out into the city from the gates of Kadic. Jeremy's voice dropped down a bit, perhaps thinking I couldn't hear. It didn't matter either way.

"He's…he's worse than before she started coming here…," he noted quietly. Both of the girls lowly and sadly agreed.

"It…I guess it was everybody's fault that it happened…," Aelita concluded, "As soon as Odd went down, he—Reese—he suddenly wouldn't budge. We should've run, but we didn't. I was too petrified when I was left as almost the last one standing…and everyone else was too weak to stop him…,"

Yumi interjected, pointing some more blame in her direction, "I could've fought back too. You all know me…I could've…if I just would've…,"

Jeremy shook his head, still speaking softly, "We've been through this blame game before. The real person who has the most blame here is the one who started it. I'm pretty sure we're all aware of that,"

Jeremy's smart. I would trust his judgment on almost every day. Especially this one.

"It's just that…," Aelita argued with herself, "I feel so…,"

"Responsible," Yumi finished. Aelita gave a short hum of agreement, and continued on.

"I know it's technically that man's fault. It just seems so impossible. I mean—yes, I know, our lives are pretty much impossible already—but this…this had nothing to do with that, this was…_real_. I mean…think about a man walking into a…house, or, daycare or whatever, taking the child, and then…,"

She bit her lip, shaking her head in disbelief. Yumi heaved a sigh.

"I think I remember who she lives—er, lived—with at least…Um, it was a sort of flower, Petunia, Pansy, no…I just, maybe if we talked with her—,"

Jesus Christ falling from the flaming sky above, I had forgotten. I had forgotten _everything_.

"God no," I said, turning around and facing them, a fresh new wave of tears beginning to cascade down, "Not her, oh God no. The only way that it could've happened would be that…she'd never give her…No, no no no…!" I gasped, horrified, "Mrs. Periwinkle…Sarah…!"

Yumi's eyes widened, "The lady, the one on the phone, is she—,"

"Periwinkle…!"

A heavy weight snagged my throat, and my knees felt like buckling. A horridly itchy quiet erupted between us all as realization set in.

Before anyone could stop me or talk sense into me, I spun on my heel without another word and sped off, my feet taking steps by memory all the way to Periwinkle's house. The three that I left there, I don't know what they thought. All I knew was that they were just as unsettled as I was. I hoped that in the long run that it would turn out to be a helpful asset in the end.

Without slowing down a step I vaulted straight over the black iron fence surrounding her old Victorian house. Panic tightened up my chest as I saw a light still on inside. That was wrong. By this time of night, everyone was in bed.

It took me three leaping strides to clear the yard, with one more skipping over the steps. My soul froze as I saw the door; open with a few windows cracked. Someone had forced themselves in. No guesses as to whom.

Keeping in mind of the possibility of other toddlers still here, I walked into the house, sweeping everywhere with my sight. Things were almost too perfect for my stomach as I walked in the first hallway. But as I passed the first one, I realized that the perfection stopped there.

A vase was on the floor—all over the floor. There were a few new chips of wood out of the staircase. An end table stood in a way that was different than the way Mrs. Periwinkle liked it, with the doily lopsided on the surface. It was devoid of the now broken vase, giving it an empty feel. Fear caught on my tongue as I called out, unable to stop the worry in my voice.

"Mrs. Periwinkle…?" No answer. It didn't help my already pounding chest. I looked around, trying to flip the hallway light on but realized to my dismay that it wasn't working. The upstairs hall, where all of the sleeping rooms were, was lit up. I gulped, then tried my luck again.

"Mrs. Periwinkle…? Sarah…? Kids…?" My voice was barely below a normal talking tone. My first thought was to go upstairs to check on the toddlers, but before I could a soft, confused groan emitted quietly to my left.

My spine stiffened, and I looked. Not a meter from the bottom of the staircase laid a crumpled Sarah, in the midst of another broken vase, a fallen end table beside her.

"Sarah…!" I breathed urgently as I took two steps over the debris to kneel by her side. Her back was facing me, so I gently took her shoulder and turned her so she was facing up. She was wearing a yellow-orange shirt with simple tiger stripes on the front, and to my luck it was not heavily stained with red. There were a few miniscule cuts here and there from the broken vases, but on her forehead was the worst damage.

Dangerously close to her temple a deep purple spider-webbed with red and blue bruise crowned her head, the outskirts of it gray, and the outskirts of that a sick parchment color. I sucked in a breath. Her neck pulsed with life still, and she had made a sound which was all good. However, it was obvious that she was suffering from a major concussion. She must have been out for hours, and only just now reviving some senses. A knot closed up my stomach and threatened my diaphragm. Still, I found strength within it to breathe as I leaned close to her, brushing back some of her tan hair.

"Sarah…? Sarah, can you hear me…?"

Something on her face twitched, and I felt around her throat to make sure her pulse kept going. Through her pulse I felt a gentle vibration struggling to come through. I recognized it as her vocal cords, and shushed her quietly, stating that I could understand that she's able to process sound. The gentle vibrating stopped, and Sarah dipped in and out between unconsciousness. Either way, I couldn't push her to stay awake. It would take too much of needed energy from her.

Thinking quickly, I stood up and traveled to the kitchen, wetting a washcloth with cool water. Gently I wrung some of the water out on Sarah's forehead before placing it right on the bruise. A forced hum echoed in Sarah's mouth, and she fled back into a coma, not to return for a long time. I twisted my mouth with worry, and, feeling the presence of eyes on me, I looked up.

A few of the older toddlers (at least reaching three or four) were on the staircase, staring at me as I tended to Sarah. As soon as they saw my eyes meet theirs, however, they scrambled over each other to escape back up the stairs.

"Wait!" I called out, trying not to sound too angry or scary. A few of them gave out awkward cries as they tried to climb, some of them slipping and not actually making any progress.

"Wait, kids, wait! It's me! It's Nevaeh's brother, it's me…!" I said, standing at the beginning of the stairs, one foot on the first one.

They stopped, scared, but still contemplating my place. The one closest to me I recognized as the one who called me 'Zanna' during the winter break. He looked at me with a strange expression—not one of fear, but just a blank stare that almost told me that he wasn't as spiritually young as the other ones. Age-wise, I think he was the oldest that Mrs. Periwinkle took care of (topping at four and a half) and probably the most mature out of the group.

"Hey…," I said quietly, trying to calm myself down, "Hey…can I talk to you…?" I asked. He just kept staring at me, not wielding an answer. My mouth muscles played around before I decided to keep talking. The other toddlers, near the edge of crying, tumbled over themselves and disappeared into the hallway. This guy remained here, silent and staring.

"What's your name…?" I asked, slowly ascending the steps. For a moment I thought he was about to move, so I stopped. We were quiet for a while before he finally answered.

"Teagan…,"

"Teagan…?" I confirmed, then nodded, "I won't hurt you Teagan. I just want to talk, is that okay?"

Teagan made no indication that it was, except for the fact that he crawled down a stair or two nearer to me. I sat down as if relaxed on the staircase, to emphasize what I said. Teagan gradually crawled closer.

"Do you know what happened here?" I asked quietly, noticing that a few eyes had suddenly popped up at the top of the stairs, watching.

"There was a guy that came…," Teagan supplied, "wanted somefing, but Serrah wudn't lettim get it…,"

I looked at him solemnly, "He wanted Nevaeh, didn't he?" Teagan slowly nodded.

"'E got into our room an' took 'er withim," he stated. I asked him if he took anything else, and he said no. Relief washed over me for only a second.

"Teagan…," I asked, and he blinked at me with dark eyes, "Where's Mrs. Periwinkle…?"

He blinked again, then closed his eyes and scrunched his nose, lost in thought. After a few minutes he opened them again.

"I think she's gone…,"

"Gone?"

Teagan hummed a bit, unsure. I asked him where, but he wasn't sure. He just knew that she wasn't here when Lukas came.

I leaned backwards, breathing out breaths that released a little bit of anxiety from me. Mrs. Periwinkle was off on a trip somewhere. That meant she was most likely safe. But Sarah…

I went back down the stairs, carefully avoiding the vase shards. I heard Teagan follow behind me, and I backed up to look at him. He returned my gaze, but his eyes had a flash of fear for doing something he maybe shouldn't have done. Apprehension crowned on him, before I gave a very small smile and held out my hand.

"C'mon Teagan…just don't step on any of the white shards, okay…?"

Teagan nodded, and kept close to my leg. I left him standing off as I approached Sarah, who wasn't faring any better as her pulse was weaker than before. Sucking in a breath, I flipped open my cell phone.

Quickly I dialed up an ambulance, explaining the situation as calmly as I could without my voice getting shaky. They told me they would deploy a vehicle and it might take three or four minutes. I thanked them and hung up.

Teagan remained where he was, watching as I gently caressed Sarah's cheek, reassuring her that help was coming even if she couldn't hear me. Softly I stood back up and turned around, sitting on the last step with Teagan.

"Is…is Serrah gonna be okay?" He asked. I could sense the other toddlers slowly following down the stairs.

"I…I hope so, Teagan…," I confessed, "I really hope so,"

As I embraced him and a few other toddlers, I took a mental note on how strange it was to be in front of the rest of the gang during a bad moment. In front of them, I'd probably break down completely, sobbing and coughing everywhere. But if I was facing this in front of a crowd of toddlers, I'd suddenly become something of a calm, silent hero. I thought it very interesting as I sat there, huddling with the other little ones and shivering from the spiritual blow.

The ambulance people came and left, listening to what I knew of the story. I hinted a connection with the kidnapping that happened at Kadic before they sped off. All they had told me in response was that if I hadn't had called them then, she probably wouldn't have made it much longer.

I gulped, and kept that information far away from Teagan and the others.

Though it was hard for me to do as they were toddlers, I eventually got every single one of them to snuggle up in their beds, assuring them that I would guard them from anything harmful. Teagan was the last to climb into bed, boldly stating that he'd help me stand guard if I needed it. I stifled a laugh and seriously accepted it in such a way that must've made his chest swell with pride.

After all of the lights were turned off, I trotted downstairs into the kitchen, where all of my confidence was simply swept away within an instant.

I collapsed into a chair, slammed my head onto the table (quietly, mind you) and began to sob heavily, burning my lungs with each intake of air.

Two people.

I had failed to protect two people all within one evening.

There was Sarah, a trusted friend and the only one who was in charge of the toddlers at the time; she suffered from a severe concussion that could've nearly killed her—and probably still could.

And then there was Nevaeh, my baby sister. She had been taken into the arms of the one man I hate, the one man I swore that I would stop, the one man who forever changed my life. The one man who could seriously hurt her in more ways than one and walk away, devoid of a guilty conscience. I had let her be stupidly kidnapped by him, allowing for her entire future to possibly be messed up for the greater good. She had put all of her trust into me, and I had flunked it like a chemistry exam. Now we were separated by a dangerously insane man who used to be my father. Separated. Nuclear fission.

I felt so sick.

My stomach was becoming non-existent as it twisted within itself, shrinking the more it snaked into knots. A hollow, daunting pain replaced it as it completely faded away, and I gnawed at the inside of my lip, trying to give a real place for the hurt. I hadn't kept my non-vocal vow to protect my younger sibling. Now I didn't know where she was or what was going to happen to her. Nevaeh's gone. And it's my fault. My fucking fault.

Again.

I don't think I noticed that I was asleep until the nightmares came like a locked on torpedo targeted at my heart.

UNITY: Try to get him down, but he'll still fight to stay together.

Great Jeremys!

The sensation of heat beat down upon me in the darkness so much I thought that I could puke. The air was dark, hideous, and heavy. My heartbeat pounded so hard I could feel the pulse in my toes and fingers. God, it was hot. Sahara hot. Sweat dribbled down on me like the Niagara itself, wetting my clothing in an uncomfortable sticky way. I was concentrating on my comfort with the temperature so much that I nearly screamed when my focus reassembled to see Yumi—the zombie version—standing a few meters away from my front.

"And so, Macbeth…?" she regarded me, arms crossed in front of her, "How does one cope with the crimes committed?"

The black spray from her mouth was still present with each breath, and my innards turned.

"Crimes? I haven't done anything! What did I do wrong?!" I protested, my voice cracking. All too soon was my body in an unauthorized state of panic with only a second of being in the dream.

"Funny state of denial, isn't it?" A voice rasped behind me. I swiveled on my heel to see the zombie Ulrich; his elongated arms tucked behind him like a Sherlock Holmes gentleman. His parchment-blank eyes gleamed with some sort of amusement. Out of all my decrepit apparitions, he was the one that I wanted to see the least. I was dimly aware that Yumi was still present, and that we were the only three in sight.

Zombie Yumi made a short hum of agreement. In response, that classic demented grin sliced Zombie Ulrich's face, pushing his green skin up against his eyes. Something felt misplaced in my organs as he did that. I didn't like that.

"Macbeth, Macbeth…," Yumi nearly chanted, making me turn to face her. She was shaking her head, "Force Macduff to make the sacrifice and reap the rewards yourself,"

"Wha—No, I—,"

"Painfully stupid, isn't he?" Zombie Ulrich interrupted. Before I could ask anything else, my back exploded with such a volcano of pain that it surely felt like it would've knocked Arnie Schwarzenegger off of his feet. Shocked senseless, I twisted my head around to find one of Zombie Ulrich's clawed hands buried around the middle of my spinal cord. My eyes were helplessly fixated to his as a new bone tail lashed about behind him, tipped like a fierce lance. There was a red flash, and the gaze between us changed drastically as I saw everything shift and dance in his eyes. All of my mistakes, my pain, my awful recent history played in his blank eyes like a old silent movie, all without end.

Strangled sobs and cries slobbered past my lips, the first tears starting to heavily roll down the curve of my cheeks. His face became washed with fake sympathy as he looked at me in an almost mothering way. The snake of a tail began to spastically dance like an excited drunkard, betraying Zombie Ulrich's poker face.

"Aw, does the little prick have an ucky boo-boo?" A short, unrecognizable whimper of 'no' slipped out right before a jolt of the claws twisted the vertebrae into stew. Then it was a long, recognizable, shriek.

"NO NO NO!! WHAT DID I DO?! WHERE WAS I WRONG?!" I burst crazily.

Zombie Ulrich's sympathy evaporated in the hot air, the age-old psychopathic glee taking its rightly position on his face. He probably spat a few things at me, judging by the movement of his lips, but I couldn't hear him over the way my own screams muted my ears. Out of sheer lipreading, I picked out three words in sync out of his paragraph.

'Wrong about Macduff'

My screams died down only a little, but by that time he had stopped talking. He said nothing else—only grinned at me like a zombie-ish Chuckie doll. The lance-snake whipped back and forth as he continued to gaze at me. Salty drops of boiling fire steamed out of my eye ducts, burning ruts in my skin the entire way.

Pain. Pain, pain, pain. Trying to wrench myself free only succeeded in burying the claw deeper within the cherry-flavored Slushee that my back was quickly turning into. It hurt, oh hell it hurt; if I could just get away, maybe twist out…No, it hurt too much. It freaking hurt too much. Can't breathe, can't think, I can't…

"How do you cope, Macbeth…?" Yumi whispered emotionlessly, "The pain, the hate…Macbeth, Macbeth, can you save Macduff?"

I turned to look at her. She looked the same, even remaining barefoot. Her face seemed blank, but maybe it was like that through the fault of the absence of pupils. Hot blood flowed down my back as she approached with slow steps.

"I…I…," What could I say? How could I know that Yumi—Macduff—needed saving? And how do I cope? Well…I guess I could answer that as, "I…don't,"

"You could…," she stated, drawing closer. My heart pace rocketed up as she stopped right in front of me, only a hand-length away. Dots of the liquid from her breath soaked into my clothes, sizzling into the air.

Pleas were forming in my eyes as fatigue began to take over, staring at her with utter desperation. As she returned the gaze with those white crusted eyes the pain in my back dulled to a distant throb. I don't think I cared at the time whether she was a decaying zombie or not—she was Yumi, deep down she was still my Yumi. Time lay in a coma, the only thing stirring were my heaving gasps for air. There were no lying sparks in her eyes, and no giveaways for what they would do next.

From the lower part of my spine came a smooth crunching sound, forcing my back to arch from the power of it. Blood pooled in my mouth, and I glanced down.

The tip of the lanced tail poked out of my stomach, smothered in my own sticky blood. A cry gurgled in my throat, creating bubbles of the liquid on my tongue. All I could taste was copper. My innards felt pulverized into a casserole, the pain finally flying past my head—it vaguely occurred to me that, well, that was incredibly bad. Dizziness flooded my vision, turning the images into kaleidoscopes. I just wanted to sleep.

Gangly arms wrapped around my neck, pulling a face close to mine. Through the drunken colors I could barely make out Yumi's dead face. Her breath smelled of lilacs, and I wished I could smile.

She still smelled the same as in real life.

For some reason it seemed as if the blood and pain all lifted right before I closed my eyes.

When I opened them again, the entire world had changed. Zombie Yumi and Ulrich had disappeared, along with my open wounds. The air was suddenly freezing cold, enough to give massive frostbite. There was something that didn't quite disappear though.

Barbed wire twisted around his body like party streamers. His skin was pasty white with blue and purple veins popping out in contrast. The eyes were simply gone, masked by a vicious thicket of wire that dug and twisted into the skin, though no blood dribbled down from it. The most recognizable feature from him, though, was his psychotic grin.

Lukas.

"Silence," he said, almost machine like, "Silence,"

"You," I whispered in disbelief, "It's you…You stole Nevaeh…," Anger began to rise up in my face, and fire burned in me, "You stole my sister, you stole my baby sister!!" A snarl curled my lip, and I crouched down, imitating a tiger about to leap. One second before my feet left the ground, a hand grasped my shoulder. I looked down at it, soon wishing I hadn't.

While I watched, the semi-normal zombie hand began to boil and char on its own, bulging and popping. Bile and chunks of puke lodged themselves into my throat, choking my usually un-squeamishness.

"Macbeth is blind, Macbeth is deaf; cannot you see it was _you_ who sent her to death?"

Sheer guilt weighed my shoulders down to the ground. The hand bubbled to an abnormal proportion, and only released me when I turned around to look at the source of the feminine voice.

As if being resurrected from the very first cryptic dream, Meria—my mother—stood there, as pulverized as the night of her murder. Brown hair sticky with the blood fell around her features in stringy clumps, falling short at her bony shoulders. Streams of red liquid smeared her skin and strained her meager clothing. Aside from the horridly diseased hand, she looked like an exact copy of Stephen King's 'Carrie' during Prom Night.

"M-Mom?" I asked feebly. She seemed to glare at me.

"Macbeth denies, Macbeth cannot see; you're killing her after you've killed me,"

Fear, panic, and guilt combined to make a very panicky Ulrich. Reese. Whichever. That panic transferred to my voice, making it rise in volume and pitch.

"But I never touched you! And Nevaeh, she…she's out of my hands!! How could I even gather the courage to _scratch_ her even if she was still here?!" Before I could go on, she narrowed her vaguely green eyes.

"Macbeth destroys, Macbeth turns his head; do not scream when she is dead," she seethed.

Out of sheer desperation and determination my hand lashed out and clenched her arm.

"She is _not_ going to die! I am _not_ going to let her _DIE!!_" I shook her vigorously, spitting and screaming in her face without care. Her facial expression didn't waver as she replied, just as calm and accusing as before.

"Macbeth speaks madness, Macbeth speaks lies; turn and see with you soul's eyes,"

Her skin undulated and bulged underneath my hand, and I all but screamed. The place on the arm where I touched her as well as the surrounding area was becoming as sickly diseased as her hand. I blazed my fingers away from her as quickly as possible, my own skin tingling with the lasting sensation of the ugly movement. Whether my imagination was fooling me or not, a faint hint of a knowing smirk crossed her face.

"Turn and see with your soul's eyes," she repeated. Magically the speed of my breath toned down. Listening to my mother's statement, I turned around.

A stiff cry blew out of me as I found Zombie Lukas standing just a hair away from me, the barbed wires giving off a chilling aura. I now understood why it was so cold here. His rotten cockroach breath pelted my face, making me grimace with unease.

"Silence," he grinned.

"Y-You don't say anything else?" I stuttered, trembling from toe to brow. That hypnotic grin was the only reason why I kept staring. I couldn't leave it.

"Silence," he answered—but something in his tone was lecherously different. A dead-looking tongue flickered out as he took a step closer. I tried to move back, but Meria was in my way.

"Macbeth is bait, Macbeth is fear; he is the food that is drawn near," she chanted. My heart froze with the atmosphere.

"N—," I began, only to be interrupted as my mouth got just wide enough. A flashing loop of barbed wire lashed out and snagged my tongue, much like a frog to a fly. Horrified screams paused in my mouth, muted by the sick intervention. The gripping teeth of the wire dug into the soft tissue, drawing tight and causing squirts of blood. I couldn't cry in pain anymore—I was all dried out.

"Silence," Lukas still said. Meria countered him with her final saying.

"Macbeth is backwards, Macbeth is wrong, how long will it be afore you hear her song? Macbeth is…silence,"

With a sharp tug from Lukas's end, my tongue became severed from my body, the remnants of it flying with the wire into the one-worded zombie's mess.

"Silence," he leered. I fell down, the side of my head cracking on the ground. My gaze penetrated nothing until I actually saw what was lying at Zombie Lukas's feet.

It was the mangled body of a poor little girl, with glowing white wings sprouting from her bloodied back.

"Nuthayuh…," I uttered without the tongue, shivering with the cold of loneliness and fear, "Nuthayuh…,"

"Silence," Lukas purred. A mess of wires suddenly came rushing at me, with precise precision to kill. I didn't close my eyes. If Nevaeh was dead, then so be it. I wanted to be dead too.

The first wire aimed itself at my skull.

"_NUTHAYUHHHHH!!_"

My eyes flew open suddenly, looking at the blue-shadowed flowered dress of Mrs. Periwinkle.

"Calm yourself, son, I'm here now, it's all right,"

I raised my head from the kitchen table, still dazed from the dream.

"Mrs. Periwinkle…," I whispered, meeting the gaze of her strong gray eyes. Her warm wrinkled hand was on my shoulder, remaining there from trying to wake me up. My eyes seared from the familiar pain, and I didn't hold them back from the relief of setting tears free.

"Mrs. Periwinkle…!"

I spent the next ten minutes helplessly sobbing in her open arms.

* * *

For all of you peabrains out there, it's pronounced Nuh-Vay-Uh. Just thought you gentlemanly people would like to know. (You're not peabrains, seriously)

The music I remember listening to while typing this is Music from Final Fantasy V and VI. Because Nobuo Uematsu is awesome and I'm looking for Cyan in Zozo. WHERE ARE YOU, MR. THOU??

Guess where the inspiration for Zombie Lukas's looks came from.

Oh, and also, I know this is getting long, but as to the people I promised a sketch from, I haven't gotten a reply from you guys for what you want as a sketch. I wasn't joking. I need something to draw--NOW. So message me about it, and I'll make sure it gets done! :)

* * *


	17. Echoes of Laughter

YARRGH MY HAIR! My waist long hair is now YARRGH-ishly short to my shoulders! It's driving me NUTS!

Lesson One: If the end of this chapter does not make you go YARRGH, there is either something wrong with me or with you. (Most likely with you, because we all know there is something already wrong with me. :)

Lesson Two: Short but nasty chapter

Lesson Three: Led Zeppelin references in the chapter title, and at the very end.

Lesson Four: Random Simon and Garfunkel reference

Lesson Five: The "scared out of my pants luckily they were buttoned" is a favorite phrase of my dearly special friend. (Special in more ways than one, psyke)

* * *

Chapter Seventeen: Echoes of Laughter

_Listening for the Sounds from Silence_

"They called for me…as soon as Sarah was settled in. After you had told them that I was on leave, I think they figured that I needed to be at the house. It took them a while to get through, out where I was, and once they did, I had to find someone who would take me back. It wasn't hard, luckily one of my fellow quilters is quite the insomniac…and through the trip I learned of everything…,"

Another tear fell onto the table top as I blankly stared into space, mouth slightly agape as I breathed through it. My arms were carelessly thrown in front of me on the table, but my back wasn't hunched too much. Mrs. Periwinkle stood to my right, her hand still on my shoulder.

"I…I lost her," I mumbled, "I lost her to that devil…,"

"Whatever happened had nothing to do with you," she approached gently. Without control my hands turned into fists and were slammed down on the table to emphasize my point.

"Yes it did!! I was there!! I could've _stopped_ him if only I had done…done…,"

Mrs. Periwinkle continued on calmly as if I wasn't screaming in her face.

"Done what?"

My voice soothed down to an angry whisper as I answered her neutrally, "Something…if only I had done _something _to make things different…!"

"Ulrich…," Mrs. Periwinkle said, finally taking a seat next to me, "There are things that happen in this world that aren't right. What's more, most of the things that go on that aren't right are never ever found out by the general public. Your current situation is one of those times where it seems like Pandora's Box is nothing but a harmless fly on your back."

"And you could've changed it for the better, but there's nothing you can do about, yeah yeah you hear it a thousand times in the media—,"

"Ulrich," Mrs. Periwinkle said, a little more firmly. I shut my mouth, biting the inside of my lip. She was silent for another minute before picking up where she left off.

"The thing about the Pandora's Box is that when all of the evils of the world escaped from it, the last and most important thing that came out was the glimmer of hope. Bad things happen every day. But still we live on, don't we? In ignorance, in bliss, in _hope_. And whenever you hear someone say that bad things happen and there's nothing you can do about it, you turn a deaf ear on them. There is _always_ something. However small and useless it may seem, it is always _something_. The butterfly effect doesn't pick and choose—it happens where all small things begin. Wars started out as insults across the border. Small businesses started on Maple Street become corporations on Wall Street in America. A small acorn in a stranded field becomes an oak tree with the power to create more oak trees and soon a forest. Friendship over time blossoms into love. You can't change the past and its cruel ways, but you can change the future by changing the present. There is nothing you can do to prevent Nevaeh from being kidnapped—but now that she _is_ kidnapped, what can you do?"

My head rested in my hands, tears still running down my face. What could I say that would be truthful and would sound non-suicidal? What could I _really_ do now that Nevaeh was kidnapped?

"I don't know…I…find her, save her, start a…a…manhunt—no, I couldn't do that, I can't…I don't know…," My hands dropped from my head to the table. I was totally lost.

Mrs. Periwinkle's hand traveled from my shoulder to my hand, and I felt the warmth of it wrap around mine. The hand may have been worn and wrinkled, but I'll be damned if it didn't seem stronger than mine.

"That's what we all say and think. We don't know how to fix problems sometimes. But there is a saying that will help," She leaned in closer to me, as if she was revealing a secret, "They say that two heads are better than one. I know you like to go it alone, Ulrich, but there are just some things that you cannot handle by yourself. Look around you for help—you will find it in friends, acquaintances, by accident, on purpose…You may even find help in your enemies if you are optimistic and lucky enough. I am sorry that I cannot look with you—I am old, though I would like to deny it. I must stay here with the kids to calm _their_ souls after I have somewhat calmed yours. I will be here, Ulrich, whenever you need me. I'm not quite giving up yet,"

Her hand squeezed mine lightly, "And if I still haven't given up after seventy-four years, you should take that as a lesson to not give up as well. Not for a very, very long time,"

I finally had the strength to hold a gaze with Mrs. Periwinkle's bold eyes. It seemed like she was talking in circles at first, but the more I thought about it the more it made sense—in some sort of way. What she was saying was the truth, whether I liked it or not. After a while I bowed my head to her eyes. Giving some thought to the situation led me to the conclusion that I needed to talk to someone besides Mrs. Periwinkle—and, of course, that someone immediately had to be Aelita.

"Do you have an idea of where to go…?" Mrs. Periwinkle asked to make sure I was seriously thinking about this. I nodded and quietly explained that I would talk to a good friend of mine. Mrs. Periwinkle nodded.

"Don't rule any other people out—you don't have to tell them everything to get them to help you. At least you know what you're going to do first,"

I blinked a few times, and some random tears dropped onto my lap. Mrs. Periwinkle hadn't taken her gaze off of me since she came, and the feeling of her eyes on my was strangely comforting and by no means awkward. I was settling in to that feeling, even though I knew I had to leave soon.

"Are you going to stay the rest of the night here, then…?" She asked quietly. I wiped my eyes with my arm and took in a shaking breath.

"I don't think I'll be able to stay here…I won't be sleeping. I need to go back to Kadic. It'll take a while to get there, and I'll probably be able to think of something to take my mind off of…well…,"

Mrs. Periwinkle nodded, "Very well. Just know that you'll always have a home here when you need it. I'll see you to the door," As we stood up a thought occurred to me.

"I-I'm sorry, Mrs. Periwinkle…I…I didn't mean for this to happen to you," I mumbled as we walked into her front hallway. I really should've known better than to say that, though.

"Posh, boy, you're going to kill yourself with all of that guilt! Erase that apology from that mind of yours this instant before I turn you into a toad! Don't even tempt me—I'll do it, I swear I will!"

For the shortest amount of time a smile crossed my face before disappearing back into the still darkness of the house. As we neared the door Mrs. Periwinkle pulled it open before I could react, and cool spring air hit our faces, refreshing us. My cheeks got a little icy from the wind that hurled against the water, but it made little to no impact on me.

Before we parted I paused, staring out into the street.

"I…I had a middle name for her…you know…," I whispered at last. Mrs. Periwinkle made no notion that she heard, but some unseen force told me that she did and she was listening intently. I lowered my chin down to my collarbone as I said her supposed name into the dark.

"Chrysanthemum…,"

Mrs. Periwinkle blinked, and shuffled closer to me.

"Only perfect names are chosen by the ones closest to them…," she murmured, "Ulrich, she'll love it—as do I,"

I blinked back the last few tears, and turned to her.

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell her…,"

Though it might've been a comment that would've earned another ridiculously sounding insult from Mrs. Periwinkle, she remained silent and stared at me—something beyond sadness and faith in her eyes. She sucked in a breath and shuffled close enough to embrace me. I was choked up and shocked at first, but eventually I hugged her back, springing new tears to my eyes.

"My heart goes with you, Ulrich…," her voice shivered, "Good luck…,"

I followed the dim street lights all the way back to Kadic's gate.

ORDINARY: Sometimes you don't need more than you have

Ordinarily Yumi.

"Well, it…it did turn out better than it could've…," Aelita confessed that morning before school under the aspen tree, "I mean, no one got fatally shot, right…?"

There are sometimes when I really admire Aelita's almost undying optimism. I don't know how I did it this time, but I managed to appreciate her lightheartedness, no matter how staggered she sounded. I, as always, had to be the worst pessimist in the history of the world.

"Yeah well, it could've gone better. Odd didn't have to end up in the hospital. Yumi shouldn't have been there, as soon as she got Nevaeh she should've run. Speaking of Nevaeh, she didn't even need to be kidnapped! I didn't do what I was supposed to out there, and that changed the entire outcome of the story, alright?!" I snapped.

To my surprise Aelita got riled up and stood over me, her brow creased with hurt anger—the edges of her eyes twinkling with water.

"It's not just about _you, _Reese! How do you think I feel? How does Yumi feel? I know how Odd feels too—he feels like he failed you and us all by being stupidly caught by the knife! What about Jeremy, who feels bad for not even _being _there! I've had it up to here with your sad ranting and self-blame all of your guilt—don't you realize that other people take blame as well? Hate to break it to you, but you're not the _only_ one who feels pain on this planet, you know! Or what was it that the anger was covering up that day that Odd and Yumi went nuts in the cafeteria?! Don't you get it? We all loved Nevaeh, and we _all_ feel the blame on our shoulders for not doing something extra that could've saved her from being kidnapped! If you would just under—,"

"She wasn't your responsibility to begin with!" I flared, standing up and sneering down at Aelita. Before I could continue, she butted in again, angry desperation in her voice.

"But we took on the responsibility to try and help you and her, didn't we? We took it as our burden too—and we feel the same pain as—,"

"She _wasn't_ your responsibility that night no matter how hard you try and make it seem like that; and you can't possibly begin to feel the same pain because she's _not. Your. SISTER!!_" I bellowed, silencing her and the critters surrounding area. Aelita flinched backwards, shocked silent. I panted afterwards, still feeling the adrenaline rush through me. Aelita stared at me with truly sad eyes for a long while before she quietly turned around and walked toward the edge of the clearing, pausing at a tree. She raised her head up and took in a breath, then turned her head slightly backwards so I could hear clearly her ending statement.

"I tried to help you, Reese…and I thought I was helping you…," A crystal tear traveled down her cheek, "But maybe I should just shut up. I don't think it would make a difference. I'm sorry, Reese…Ulrich…Really, I am. I just don't know how I'm supposed to prove it to you…,"

She closed her eyes tightly, wrinkling her nose as she did it. Another sparkling tear escaped into the morning, and she sniffed before she turned away and went back to Kadic, saying nothing more to me the rest of the school day.

After school let out I flagged down a taxi and asked to be taken to the hospital where Odd was staying. The man (who was Spanish) waved his hand and told me to get in. I clambered into the passenger seat, noting that the driver's name was Romeo Sanchez. A wooden Christian cross necklace hung from the rear-view mirror, dangling with each bump and turn Romeo took. As he drove the newly inserted radio boomed out loud Subdigitals music, helping me to focus on nothing else but the vibration of the seat with each bass drum. He talked as he went, but I could only pick out a few words over the music and his heavy accent. Still, I kept up with the conversation as best I could as he remarked about his wife having a baby in the same hospital. (Or…something like that.)

He dropped me off at the visitor's door and I paid him from the savings of my wallet. I think he wished me good luck before I shut the door and he sped off, looking for another customer, the booming music quaking the ground the entire way.

I shook my head and walked up to the counter, asking if Odd was seeing visitors. After a short checkup, the lady nodded but remarked that I could only visit for a few short minutes. I thanked her nonetheless and made my way to the elevator.

Odd's room was boring. White and boring. White and blank and boring. White and blank and sterile and boring. He recited so himself. Then he asked why I was here.

"I…," Crap. I came to express feelings, _totally_ forgetting and blowing the notion over my head that I have an _unnaturally_ hard time of doing that. Still, I tried nonetheless.

"You uh…didn't have to…do that…," I finally said softly, standing to his right. Odd cocked his head and raised a pierced eyebrow before opening his mouth in a long 'oh.'

"You mean that?" He gestured to his outstretched and supported leg, "You mean I didn't have to save your butt from death? Well, okay, if you wanted to end up dead and wanted us including Nevaeh to witness it as well—,"

You know, I really…_really_ hate it when an idiot says wise things that are just…wise and…not moronic. And I really…_really_ hate it when I am forced to agree with him—and _like_ it!

"I—That—But…,"

Odd grinned and tried to adjust his position to a more comfortable one. He kind of failed, but that didn't seem to bother him anyways.

"If ya don't want to waste your precious breath, ya don't have to. I know—er, uh, knew—a guy that was just like you. Had the hardest of time just saying 'thank you.' Which, I believe, is what you're saying to me now? Hey, chill, no worries, you look like you're going to explode—and we don't want to mess up the sterile room with guts now, do we?"

He gave a sly wink and a small chuckle as he continued, "It was no problem, man. We're buddies, right? No matter how flippin' distant you are—we're buddies. Buddies do those kinds of things for one another, you know? Don't worry, I'm not expecting something in return—I was just tryin' to help. You're welcome,"

My mouth moved, but there wasn't a sound out of it. Yeah. He knew me too well—and didn't even know it. Odd continued to stare at me with that stupid smile of his, his expression calm and confident, not menacing at all. It stirred something old and buried within me.

I think my tongue finally got a hold of itself and was just about to say an actual sentence when the door opened again. In poured the rest of the Lyoko gang, relieved and happy to see Odd. The flicker on my tongue extinguished, and I stepped back, letting the others through. Aelita didn't give me a second look.

I didn't really stay to hear the conversation between them, nor did I listen when they started it. I just slid my way to the door behind their backs and opened it to leave.

As I was opening it the presence of eyes made the back of my head tingle. I looked back and saw Odd giving me a not-too-obvious stare as I left. I blinked once, then finally mouthed the words I had come to say in the first place.

"Thank…you…,"

Odd smiled and gave another wink, then officially turned to his friends. I shut the door quietly behind me and walked back out, my head hung down the entire way. No, this definitely wasn't one of my happy moments.

Judging by how much it cost to drive me here, I didn't have enough money to make it back without choking my wallet so it coughed up seaming. Maybe if I gave them an arm they would take me farther. Either way, it landed with me walking back to Kadic. It's not that I mind walking; it's just really, really far to walk. I think Jeremy, Yumi and Aelita all pooled their money together for a cab both ways. I shook my head in wonder, and crossed the first street.

Walking gave me an unlimited time to think. I didn't _need_ an unlimited time to think—I _already_ think too much as it is. It's not good to think too much, but I think I fail hands down in that category. Too many subjects to ponder and worry about.

Odd was stuck in his boring, white, sterile, blank hospital room. He had good company, but he wouldn't have been there if he hadn't have needlessly stuck up for me. He passed it off as no problem—and I know I do that when I get hurt in someone's place, but still. It's rattling in my mind that he didn't need to do that and that if I knew he was going to, I would've stopped him. Somehow.

Then again, if I had stopped him, I don't think I would be here now. My face probably would've been stabbed through with a switchblade—all in front of my little sister too. Yeah, I was thankful, that's why I visited him, but I…I don't know. He got hurt in the process, and I'm taking it as my fault.

Yumi had enough problems with me as it is, and then for Lukas to trot along and insult everything to do with her honor including her friends _and_ enemies, that's just horrid. If only Lukas was a bit more accepting of the differences, then it wouldn't be so damaging to her. Yeah. If only.

Keep thinking like that and you should look up to see pigs with wings in the sky.

I wondered what she thought of me and Lukas. If that encounter had changed her thinking in any way about me, I would kind of like to know it. But then, we all want to know these kinds of dumb secrets, right? I just want to know how this affected her. How this affected _everyone_. Aelita has become stone cold to me. Jeremy is sympathetic from a distance. Odd started calling us 'buddies'; not 'good buddies', just buddies. And yet I still don't understand completely how Yumi's reacted to it. She showed concern for Mrs. Periwinkle, but so far that's all I know. Maybe I could arrange a talk with her…

No. Stop it. He's come for you once. He'll do it again. And if you've bonded even more with her under alias when he comes back, there'll be no hesitation. Especially if he doesn't bring Nevaeh. Which, if he's smart and he's smart, he won't.

I focused on the rough sidewalk as my thoughts suddenly got diverted to Nevaeh. That's when the worry really set in alongside the panic and sorrow. Where was she? How was she coping? What was happening to her? Is she alone with Lukas? Was she scared out of her wits? Is she calling for me right now?

Or…even worse…has she given up on asking for me to save her?

I stopped walking dead in my tracks, head hung down. I wasn't aware that anyone was staring, but if they were I didn't really care. That was a fair possibility, that question I just asked myself. I had failed to protect her when the vital time came, and I had let her down and allowed her to be kidnapped by the most evil man in the world. I _allowed_ that to happen. I could've stopped it.

The gun was in my hands and I should've done something to stop him. Even if it wasn't killing him, I could've done something—shot him in the knees, you know? Something that would've prohibited him to move. But I didn't. And by doing that the scene ended with Nevaeh being dragged off in Lukas's arms to God knows where. It left three wounded and dazed and the other scared out of her pants. (Luckily, they were buttoned.)

I kept my gaze down and crooked my head slightly to the side, and continued walking. Frustration and rage built up in me and I found my hands being clenched to the point of white knuckles and sore fingers. It didn't stop until I finally found myself at Kadic's entrance, realizing that it was suppertime. Walking must've taken longer than it seemed. I shrugged, and entered the cafeteria.

What was left of the Lyoko gang sat at a table, having been there for a short while. Yeah. They pooled their money together, obviously.

Supper was lunchroom-bland, even with Rosa's outstanding cooking I found it hard to swallow. It either was the last of the food supplies or it was my thoughts that made the food bland, but it was like ash in my mouth.

After I was done I tried going to my room to find it crowded with none other than Milly and Tamiya. At first Kiwi came to my head, but when a passerby walked by they asked if they had seen me because they wanted to ask a few questions. I was at the dorm entrance so they couldn't take note that I was there. I sniffed soundly and turned around. The last thing I need was a demoted version of the press jumping onto my back and shouting careless questions into my ears.

I wound my way back into the park and where the aspen was. I wasn't expecting Aelita to come. I wasn't expecting anybody to pass. I just sat down there within the roots and tucked my chin down onto my collarbones. The black yin-yang shard barely touched my chin from under my shirt, and the presence of it somehow helped me to nod off into sleep.

CARE-FREE: It's a bit different than careless, and 20 more fun too.

20 more of Odd.

When I awoke it was night. I gave a muffled grumble and readjusted my seating. I didn't know how late it was. Probably near midnight, take a few minutes or so. I nodded off at seven o' clock, mostly because of the lack of sleep I had received the night before.

I shook my head and stood up, brushing the random debris from the seat of my pants. Milly and Tamiya came to my head, and I figured that they weren't crowding my door anymore, so I should head back.

As I was walking through the forest seemed almost too quiet. No crickets. No frogs. No crows, even. Branches swept by me, new leaves just sprouting from the ends. Then there was finally a noise in the woods, but it wasn't something I welcomed to hear.

I'm not sure if it was completely real or not, but what I heard was what I heard.

It was the beginning notes of _Stairway to Heaven_.

I froze. It had to be my imagination, I was almost sure of it. When I stopped it didn't play anymore. I blinked a few times, and turned around, searching for a sign. There were none. Two decisions raced in my head: Go to the dorm, or go investigate.

Guess which one I chose.

Blindly I moved through the woods in a different direction, going deeper to find the source of the noise I thought I heard. Really dumb, right? I swear I'm going mad, but I still need to know if what I heard was true. After a while of stumbling through growing undergrowth, there was a moan.

Once again I froze and quietly listened. Another weak moan was located almost immediately to my right. I chanced a half-blind glance, seeing a clearing. Carefully I picked my way to it and instantly recognized the familiar rock face.

Then I saw the body.

They were laying half-way between me and the rock, facing away from me. Every now and then they'd give out a weak moan with some random mutters in between. Without giving a smart thought about safety, I bounded from the woods into the clearing and skidded to a stop near them. Tentatively I reached out and gently grabbed their shoulder, turning them upward.

I sucked in a breath as two red locks stood out against the night.

Yumi moaned softly again, and began to mutter what seemed to be words. I couldn't hear her, so I dropped down on my hands and knees, lowering my ear to her mouth.

"_There's a lady who's sure…all that…glitters is…gold…and she's…buying a stairway…to heaven…,_"

* * *

YARRGH!

By the way, I don't listen to Stairway to Heaven too often. Not because it's eight minutes (I have a song that's thirty minutes long, mind you.) just because I...don't listen to it as often as I should.

_And the forests will echo with laughter..._


	18. Secured Fears

Before we begin...

Silence of the Lambs, anyone?

* * *

Chapter Eighteen: Secured Fears

_Panic with warmth_

"_When she gets there…she knows…if the…stores are all…closed…with a word…she can get…what she wants…,_"

The first few lines from Led Zeppelin's best known song. Yumi was either consciously or subconsciously reciting a song that I had begun to associate with Lukas's villainous knowledge over me. Trembling as I did it, I shook her a few times, trying to get her to wake up and come back to the real world.

She didn't respond.

At this point I didn't even try asking if she was alright. I picked her up by the shoulders and lapels, finding that she was as boneless as a cat when her head hung back limply. Still she murmured the lyrics.

"_And she's…buying a…stairway to…heaven…,_"

Panic had settled in, and I yelled at her sharply, "No Yumi, shut up just shut up please…!" I gave her a little shake, and her head rolled about a bit, still limp. Another pitiful moan brushed passed her lips, and I winced.

"Ohhh, this isn't working, this isn't…Yumi…!" My head jolted up and looked around as if I could find someone in the park in the middle of the night who knew what was going on and could help me get Yumi to a place where she could be dealt with. My attention snapped back to her as she gave a louder moan and tossed her head.

"Yumi? Yumi can you hear me? It's me; it's Reese—c'mon, wake up, Yumi!"

The response I got wasn't pleasing in the least, as she just launched into the next line of the song. I gave a troubled and worried grumble and pulled her up to a sitting position, letting her lifelessly lay on me. Devoid of any thought as sudden paranoia raced through me, I found myself hugging her close, my fingers crumpling her denim jacket into fists. My head still shot this way and that, though I didn't cry out for help. Yumi's cheek rested on my shoulder, her face away from me. I began to rock her anxiously back and forth, my breath pace quickening by the second.

"…_cause you know…sometimes…words have…two meanings…,_"

Jesus Christ this is too much for me. Yumi suddenly having a mental attack and subconsciously quoting nothing but _Stairway to Heaven_ in perfect order in the middle of the night smack dab in a random forest did _nothing_ for my already tampered nerves. She didn't even _like_ Led Zeppelin for that matter! This time it was me who let out a scared moan as I rubbed Yumi's back.

Without warning, Yumi paused in mid-word to let out a pained cry. I jumped and instinctively my hold on her tightened. She screamed again, and I let go. The scream died down to a cold whimper as she grew quiet for a moment. Frantically I tried to clear my mind as I delicately ran over her back.

Near her left shoulder, part of a place I had rubbed, the denim jacket was torn. My eyesight turned down to it even though it was near useless to see in the dark. Uneasy, I let my fingers poke about in the tear. At the same time Yumi gave another scream the sensation of warm liquid hit one of my fingers. I grimaced and pulled back immediately.

"Oh Yumi…," I whispered in sorry horror.

There was a short moment of nothing but shaky breaths in the air before Yumi picked up where she left off.

"…_sometimes all…of our…thoughts are…misgiven…,_"

"God Yumi I…I'm so sorry…," I whispered, lowering my head down into her hair, "I didn't want this to happen…," I sniffed back a few tears as she continued on reciting the lyrics.

A few more moments followed of Yumi muttering Led Zeppelin and me trying to hold back tears. We were alone—or so I thought.

Undergrowth loudly rustled nearby—far too loud for a squirrel or even a badger. My head snapped up. Wolf or bear, deer or human, the thought in my head echoed finally that we shouldn't be there. As quietly as I could I stood up with deadweight Yumi. Her feet hit the ground, twisted and crumpled underneath her, and held no responsibility for her weight. I gritted my teeth and hauled her up, paying no attention to where my hands or arms landed as long as it wasn't in her wound. Something in the woods cracked, and I disgracefully stumbled off. If I had time I would've picked Yumi up in an easier position to walk with, but there wasn't any time for anything.

Quickly I went diagonal for the rock face, hoping that there might be something to hide behind if time grew any shorter. With Yumi on my left and the rock on my right, I half-limped through, letting my hand graze the rock to see if I could find anything of use. My heart jumped almost to the moon as a rabbit fled in front, and I let out a near-silent exasperated sigh. Then it clicked in my head.

The rabbit ran _out_ of the rock across my path, not from the forest.

I slapped the rock with my right hand, knowing that a rabbit was pretty freaking small compared to a human, but if I could just find something…

The undergrowth grew louder, and my searching became more desperate. I was just about to give up and move on when my hand dunked into the rock unexpectedly. I stole a look to find a dark crevasse ripping up the side of the rock for nearly three meters. It was just barely wide enough for Yumi and I if we face each other. I sucked in a breath before taking the plunge, and stuffed the both of us in there as the thing in the undergrowth finally stepped out into the clearing.

A cuss stole across my mind as I tried to ease us farther into the surprisingly deep and thin cave. Let me tell you, it wasn't quiet business. I had to stop after we were barely half a meter in. It wasn't comfy being in there—Yumi and I were so close that her nose would easily scrape my chin if she was standing up straight. Not to mention the fact that when you're _that_ close there are other things that you have to worry about—such as being chest-to-chest.

Of course I'm only saying that because we were.

Urk!

With what little space she had, Yumi began to slump down to an uncomfortable-looking position. Hearing the stranger outside gave chance for another cuss in my head, and I swiftly grabbed her waist to keep her supported. As she was just about as straight as she could be, a chilling thing played from outside.

Someone was whistling, and they were whistling _Stairway to Heaven_.

God. I'm really starting to _hate_ that song.

"_and the…forests will…echo…with…laughter…,_" Yumi whispered. The hairs on the back of my neck raised, and I placed my remaining hand hastily on her mouth. The whistling got closer, and soon the individual began to talk.

Yes, it was Lukas's voice.

"Funny thing happened, tonight. Found a girl on the forest floor, you know. She must've been in some sort of coma, yet she kept reciting this one song that nearly everyone knows. Wasn't long before I actually recognized the pitiful thing. Tried to wake her up, but no matter worked. Not even pain…,"

My spine stiffened. _Pain?_ Not good. Was that where the wound on her shoulder came from? The footsteps from outside came closer, and suddenly I realized that the lightness of skin tones stood out against the dark. I removed my hand from Yumi's mouth, breathing relief when she kept quiet, and gently spread my fingers along her lower chin, pushing her face so she would've been looking further into the mini-cave. The black of her hair now showed outside, and was much more likely to be ignored. I kept my eyes on the opening for as long as I dared, and as soon as his body came into view my head was in the same direction as Yumi's.

"I went away for a while to see if anyone else had noticed, but when I came back, the girl's gone…Interesting, no?" I stifled a gulp and made no movements; thanking God that Yumi had mercifully remained silent.

"I wonder if someone found her while I was gone…? She could basically be out for a few days at the time I looked at her. It shouldn't have been too long ago—and they couldn't have gone far…Perhaps if a look around a little?"

He left the question hanging in the air as he walked about. Time seemed to slow to a pace that a snail could beat. He walked around within the general area, taking forever to look everything over. I was just glad he didn't have a light with him. That would've been bad.

I don't know how many times he went around, but near the time I thought he was going to give up, Yumi gave a stirring groan.

Every muscle in my body tensed, not knowing if he had heard that or not. He was on the far side of the original clearing—at least, so I calculated. I couldn't pinpoint his position from here. But even though it was practically useless, I slapped my hand to silence Yumi's mouth. She jerked in surprise as I did it, and in response I let my fingers bite down into her cheek to emphasize how dire the situation was. She cut off a cough and tried to keep silent.

At least she was back in normal consciousness now. Not the best timing though.

Lukas walked slower than before as he passed us. In fact, when he got to the placing of the crevasse, he stopped completely, listening. I sucked in a breath and held it, my hands clenching both Yumi's face and her waist in a nerve breakdown, anxiety trying to get me to shiver all over. Sweat began to roll down my forehead as he kept standing there. Yumi gave small little sways every now and then, still dazed. Nothing stirred for five unbearably long minutes.

Finally he sniffed and walked away. This time I mean really walked away. I heard him step into the woods a dozen or so paces. I didn't quite release my breath until he took a few more steps to symbolize he was possibly leaving.

Possibly.

Knowing Lukas he'd probably return in five minutes or so. That might be my strong paranoia speaking up again, but better safe than sorry.

Edgily I released my hand from Yumi's mouth, softly whispering in her ear.

"Don't talk. Just whisper. Don't try to get out of here—I don't think he's totally left yet. Just…," I paused for a moment, pondering on how she would take this, "trust me,"

Her response was a groggily low hum that indicated that she was trying to make words. I tried to fill in my best realistic guess to what could've happened to her if it wasn't entirely Lukas's fault.

"You were…drugged or something, I don't know. Apparently he found you first—then I found you when he left for a moment. So now we're here…,"

"…hurts…," she mumbled between hums. I pressed the bridge of my nose against her forehead, wanting to say something comforting but running out of ideas or courage to do so.

Far off the undergrowth snapped again, but only once. It wasn't far enough to get comfortable, but it wasn't close enough to stay stone silent. I held back a wince and attempted to shift position within the mini-cave.

_Dammit, he's still here. If he were leaving there'd be a lot more movement out there…_I twisted my mouth in the dark. Using my now free hand (which was incidentally my right hand and the one that was toward the outside) I swatted at the dark, finding no wall that close to us. It was a little strange and awkward to do, flinging my hand and shoulder in front of Yumi, pressing her against the wall. I suspected that she suppressed a few disgruntled cries here and there.

"Scoot farther in," I said to Yumi, who gave a confused sound. Thankful that she couldn't see me roll my eyes, I tightened my hold on her waist and grabbed the arm of the injured shoulder and almost lifted her up as I unceremoniously scraped us farther into the safety of darkness. She gave somewhat of a growl to how discourteous I was, but how courteous _can_ you be when ungraciously stuffed in a much too thin cave and a dangerous man suspecting you're near also? I didn't really pay attention to her plea as I moved farther, using my hand as a guide.

The forest suddenly made an unsuspecting and scary snap. Yumi gave a hushed gasp and turned her head to the outside. I did the same, my arm still hanging in the air. The little light that was allowed in through the gap was covered up by an approaching figure. Yumi and I instantly went silent, our eyes wide. Once again I clenched Yumi's waist tighter than needed, ready to throw her behind me if need be.

He stood there for a few minutes, daring us to breathe. I don't think we did. Forever came and went. Lukas didn't move.

Yumi lost strength to hold herself up and her head smacked into my chest. We both didn't give a vocal sound save for the physical bump. It might've been quiet, but it sounded like a volcano—as usual. Panic and fear froze the air as forever passed us again.

Lukas snarled and turned, storming off. Intimately I listened, hearing his footsteps fade into the nothingness of night.

He was gone.

Simultaneously our breaths were released, the wind blowing strands of our hair astray. Yumi gratefully stole multiple loud heaves of air, trying to rapidly heal her situation. During this process she breathed with her shoulders, and she rediscovered her injury.

"Gurrgh…," she winced, trying to roll her shoulder to shake it off.

"Don't do that, you're hurt," I chided, restraining myself from taking her arm.

"No…crap…," she murmured, her voice laced with shrill pain.

I began to move so I could make more room for the both of us. Yumi made a few uncomfortable noises as she was pressed against the wall. I wriggled in the deeper direction of the crevasse, feeling freer the more I pulled. My torso became unstuck rather quickly and I leaned over, putting my weight over to that side.

"You uh, wanna try getting your uh…waist—uh, waist free?" I asked, a damned stutter in my voice. Yumi gave an agreeing gurgle and shifted her hips, freeing us up even more. We were extremely close from being completely unstuck when my arm flung to the left but didn't hit a wall.

"Wha—,"

Before I could express more surprise Yumi slid away and my weight was entirely off-balance. The next thin Yumi heard was a strange "GAAAH!" and a _whump_ onto the rock floor. My feet scraped her shins or something as I went down, and Yumi stumbled, catching herself between the walls.

There was silence as the dust settled, a faint flapping in the air. Finally I made what must've been a relieving response.

"Ow,"

Yumi's offbeat steps echoed in the cave as she awkwardly came forward. Still lying on the floor I rolled about, trying to find a good place to stand while scrambling about and making a keen observation.

"Uh…it's hollow,"

She shuffled closer, stopping when she hit the soles of my shoes. The flapping continued overhead from multiple sources scattered about above our heads. As I stood up Yumi found the answer to the riddle.

"Bats…,"

I stood up next to her, noticing that she was still swaying occasionally. Instead of taking her shoulder or waist, I simply stood so my shoulder pressed against hers.

"Don't like bats?" I asked casually. Yumi sounded a bit weak, but other than that she seemed like she was recovering fairly quickly.

"No, they're fine…," she drifted off with a hum.

We stood there for a few minutes until it occurred to me that Yumi _was_ hurt and needed to go back to Kadic to get some help. I leaned away from her so her attention was on me before I started talking.

"It'd be better to go back now—," I mentioned but was immediately cut off by the other human in the room.

"No—No, uh…," she said rather sharply for her state, "I don't want to go back…,"

I blinked at her, confused, "Why?" Yumi sucked in a breath that said already that she _didn't_ want to talk about it. An exasperated sigh escaped me, and for a moment I though about threatening to leave her there and go back by myself—but then, what reason did I have to go? I had a reason to stay, albeit heroically dumb or not. Yumi was hurt in (to her) an unreachable place, and if she wanted to stay, who was going to bandage up that wound to keep it from infection?

"Don't ask me why, I—I…,"

"Fine," I interrupted with a trace of harshness, "Just stay near me—I want to know how big this cave is,"

I heard her feet shuffle closer, and soon the sleeve of my jacket had a curious tug. Sniffing in approval, I followed her example and scuffed to the nearest natural wall.

Moving blindly around in the dark for ten or fifteen minutes found us back where we started. There were no other passages or openings leading to foreign places, and in a nutshell the cave was the size of a very large bedroom.

I breathed out a sigh through my nose, and found what substituted as a corner, and sat down. Yumi walked a few steps away from me, and did the same. She took in a few shaky breaths before normalizing her lungs. An involuntary wince sputtered from her mouth, bringing me back to why I had stayed in the first place.

"Is your back facing me?" I asked suddenly. Yumi paused, then countered with a confused question.

"…What?"

"Is your back facing me?"

"Um…no…,"

"Turn around," I commanded lightly. Pebbles on the floor skittered about as Yumi scuffed the ground, and I waited, presumably facing her. It was pitch black—it's not like it was going to be easy. When the scuffing stopped I quietly asked if she was ready.

"Yes…," she responded weakly, but this time it wasn't because she had recently been knocked out—I could hear the difference in her voice.

Confusion!

"Take your jacket off," I said in the same tone as before. I could almost hear Yumi jerk in surprise in the thick darkness.

"Wh-What??"

"I said take your jacket off—don't go deaf on me," I repeated. Yumi did something in the dark that was too little to be standing up but too much to be that she hadn't moved.

"What are you going to do?" She asked, with a little surprising dash of fear in her voice. I shook my head and stated my purpose as simply as I could.

"I'm going to somehow help that wound of yours. Do you have a problem?" Yumi inhaled a few difficult moans and remained silent. I took this as a hesitant 'no' and carefully reached my hand forward.

When it touched the back of her shirt a shudder traveled up her spine, making her back arch and her shoulder blades give way partly. My fingers felt around the bluntness of one of her blades as I softly asked, "This is your right side, correct…?"

Yumi lowered her head and uttered a slow 'yes.' Tentatively I let my hand wander to the left, barely skimming her shirt. It's not like I hadn't done this before—there were times where I helped my mother bandage up some back injuries, and there were way too many times to count where I had to figure out how to care for my _own_ scratches and bruises. Of course, Yumi may not have known or suspected that; though I don't think being worried over my nursing skills was the reason why she was so jittery. It's all a matter of how you would feel when you're stuck in a pitch-black cave with a person you hate beyond belief, possibly hiding from a dangerous person that the hated one grew up under. And it's all that on top of not enough knowledge of whom the heck the hated one really was. Yeah. I'd be a bit freaked too.

Soon enough the ribbed fabric became frayed and torn, and Yumi sucked in a wince. I pressed my pointer finger near the tear, suddenly thinking of what to do with it. Yumi began to breathe with a little more labor than she should've been, obviously betraying her slightly splintered nerves. I took in a deep sigh, and lowered my voice, softening it as well.

"I'm not going to hurt you. I swear," I said sincerely, "Do you trust me?"

Yumi paused, not sure of how to answer that. I waited patiently, knowing that she'd come up with something sooner or later.

"No. I don't," she said finally, "But I don't have a choice, do I?"

I smirked, "You _could've_ just gone back to Kadic, you know…,"

"I'm _not_ going back out there!" She burst unexpectedly. I put up a hand in defense even though she couldn't see it.

"It's not like I'm forcing you or anything," I said, still smiling for some reason. Yumi's head jerked slightly backward as if she could look at me, her voice snarling with intended venom.

"You could just _shut up_ about it as well and just get this _over_ with!!"

"Can't," I replied immediately.

"What?" Yumi snapped, her voice a few volume notches lower.

"No bandages. No _immediate_ bandages, that is," I was going to add that I could use my tank top as strips for that purpose, but I don't think the idea of me taking my shirt off and going with just a jacket would've appealed to this…angrily fragile Yumi. If she was going to suggest that, I was going to leave it up to her.

She was silent for a while, thinking. It wasn't very long before she came up with an idea. Similar to mine, but different.

"My sleeves," she said suddenly, straightening up, "I've been looking for a billion excuses to get rid of these sleeves," I kept my finger in its spot as she began to move around, tugging at the frilly sleeves that she mentioned. Realizing a crucial thing after a while, she asked me a favor with the greatest of difficulty.

"Grab the tank top rung, will you? Just hold it in place—and _don't_ try anything," she seethed through gritted teeth.

I disguised a shrug and did as she asked. Within a little time there was a few resounding rips as the sleeve came loose. She tossed it back at me, and I placed it in my lap. The other sleeve came off without dispute, and soon I had some adequate bandages.

"Thanks," I mumbled, taking my finger off of her back and preparing the sleeves, one end between my teeth and the other in my fist. Systematically I began tearing them into thick strips, noting that the material was rather light. Yumi remained silent. When I was soon to being done, I began to tell her a few things she should know.

"These are gonna be dry bandages. At this point wet ones would work the best—antiseptic even better, but I'm not about to go looking for a stream or stealing from medicine cabinets. Unless you keep bleeding and wet the bandage with blood, it's gonna feel awful scratchy and uncomfortable—but it's better than nothing. Regardless of blood other places where the bandage is tied on might feel uncomfortable as well. And unless you want a spit shine, I'm not going to clean out the wound either—_damn_ I wish I had water for that. You were on the ground…,"

I didn't realize I was talking that much until Yumi suddenly interrupted me.

"How do you know all of this?" She asked, rather surprised. I mean, some of the info I was giving was common sense, but if I was rattling it off all at once like a professional home nurse (because I must've been) it might sound a bit strange. I blinked a few times, my eyes wide, then dropped my voice down to its normal irritable level.

"Think hard enough, you'll figure it out…," I muttered. She was quiet for a while, curiously trying to think of how she knew that. While I had just finished wadding up a strip into a pad, she gave out a soft 'Ohhh…,' and didn't ask any more questions.

I let my fingers find the frayed spot on her back again, then warned her of some pain. I felt her back muscles tense up in preparation before I pressed the pad to her wound—and not lightly either.

"Ah…," she grunted, "Ahh…gaah…,"

"Sorry," I murmured normally, "but pressure is the only thing I can give you at this point," Keeping my hand on the pad, I reached into my lap and grabbed the long bandage that I had tied together. Gathering it all up I tossed it over onto Yumi. She gave a short surprised jerk before I started to explain.

"Take one of the ends and throw it over your shoulder. Take the other one and put it in my hand underneath your arm," And the only reason why we're doing that the hard way is because I didn't want her to freak and smash my head against the wall because I invaded her personal space.

After she fumbled with it for a bit I felt the gentle presence of the sleeve over her shoulder. I positioned my hand palm-up near her waist and waited. It wasn't long before Yumi's hand found mine and placed the other end in mine. There was a short but noticeable moment where neither of us moved, keeping our hands touching. Then Yumi took her hand hastily away, brought back by the real world. Slowly I closed my fingers around the end, and retreated, pulling the bandage with me.

I took both of the strips in one hand, pulling them tight against Yumi's shoulder. Putting them in my teeth, I warned her again about the pain.

"This, is gonna hurt," I said, pulling the strips taunt. I then switched my hand with my sharp elbow, keeping the same pressure (if not more) on it.

A sudden scream was audibly struck in her throat. I grimaced, and put on end in each hand. Working as quickly and as best as possible I tied the makeshift pressurizer as tightly as I could.

When I had finished I was left with expected leftovers that dangled a fair way from the wound. I knew how to deal with that. Ever so lightly I lifted the pad up, intending to tuck the extras in. I had almost successfully hidden them when I must've hit a huge nerve.

Yumi jolted, cried, and involuntarily launched herself forward. Since I was in a way connected with her movement, I too flew forward unexpectedly, my hands thankfully coming free from the bandage so I wouldn't tear it out. That, however, did nothing to stop me from landing square on top of her, front to back.

"Gaaah...," she complained, but of what I don't know. A little weary myself, I lifted my torso up like a push-up, bluntly defending myself.

"That wasn't my fault," I said, somehow sitting up without touching her again. She gave a disgusted gurgle as she followed suit, probably wanting to say something but decided against it. After we had both righted ourselves the job was considered done, and we sat with our backs against the wall.

It wasn't long before the quiet was broken with chit-chat.

"So...how exactly did you know those things?" she asked, knowing that those experienced words were far from normal. I answered glumly with a hint of anger, repeating my past statement.

"I _said_ if you thought hard enough that you'd figure it out,"

"I _did_ figure it out," she retorted, "You tended your own...scars...but I don't know where _those_ came from yet—and I'm asking you—_again_."

I stifled a growl and dug my fingers in my hair, thinking furiously. How could I explain it all with dodging it all—at the same time? Lukas already knew about her, so it couldn't be _all_ that bad, could it?

Yes. Yes it could.

She could feel sorry for me. Want to help me. Snuggle right up because she knew my secret. Try to keep close to me. Talk to me. Create a friendship in me. Love me...?

No. That's too much of a risk. She was already too damn close as it was when she was an enemy. Asking questions she knew I could very well answer even though I wasn't fessing up...Damn you, Yumi! Sometimes you can be too stubborn and clever for your own good. The only thing I could do now was...

"Quid pro quo," I cowed. The air around Yumi stiffened up.

"What did you say?" She sneered, obviously not happy. I could tell that she knew exactly what I meant.

"Quid pro quo," I repeated, feeding more dominance into my voice, "You ask me a question, I answer—as long as you answer _my_ question as well. Quid pro quo, Yumi," I paused, "It's only fair,"

Dry frustration swelled in Yumi's throat, making an odd, angry sound. Then she reluctantly blurted out a very annoyed 'fine.'

I went first, "That boy who was found...you were his friend,"

Yumi kept silent, her aura neutral.

"...how close were you to him...actually?"

Yes that was undeniably mean. But then she might get a taste of how hard it is to tell her _my_ answers. Payback is bittersweet.

Absence of comfort echoed in the cave with a squeak from a bat, all bouncing about Yumi. She shifted where she sat, amplifying the effect.

"That's...not a fair question," she softly murmured. Like a flash of hot lightning I was all too quick to reply.

"Oh really? You're asking me the exact same thing—fair's fair. Maybe you should take this feeling into consideration the next time you barge into my past!"

"It should be simple, shouldn't it? All I'm asking is how precisely you got those scars, not anything about—,"

"Then you'll ask deeper questions, invade my life, and news flash! You have _no_ idea what these scars mean!"

Yumi flared in defense, "I would if you'd just _tell_ me!"

"You believe it's that easy?! Let me dig my claws into your skin a couple hundred times and see how talkative you are then!"

"And what danger do you face?!" she challenged slyly.

_It's not the danger _I_ face, but the danger _you_ will!_ My head screamed, but my mouth arrogantly ignored the plea.

"Changing the subject? Why would you want to know that?"

"Are you really that horrible?!" she accused in disbelief.

"No, I'm worse," I scoffed.

"The _one_ question you haven't dodged!" she exclaimed.

"Believe me, I would've if it would shut you up," I growled. There was a short pause where Yumi released a cry of frustration and failure, then she messily blurted something out that stopped my time with just the words aside from the choked tears in her voice.

"_I loved him,_ okay?!"

To her surprise I bet, I didn't answer. Love is not something to meddle with lightly.

"I just...," she sucked back a sob, "didn't tell him in time...,"

"Better late than never," I replied after a while. Her voice was hopelessly confused.

"What...?"

Even though she couldn't see it I gave a casual nod in faint direction of the sky.

"You don't believe in immortal spirits?" My voice had toned down quite a bit in the short time period that it had.

Yumi was quiet for quite some time, unsure of how to answer. Soon I relieved her and whispered into the darkness the one secret that hurt the most.

"You're not the only one to lose a loved one without saying good-bye...," If I was any louder she would've heard the tremor in my pitch. A deep knife cruelly twisted in my heart, bringing back all the hurt and memories of finding my innocent mother torn up in that accursed alley. I felt like crying, but I physically couldn't.

Following the direction of my feelings, Yumi calmed down in the same way as she drew a conclusion from what I said.

"Is that what you think of the stars?"

I didn't say anything. All I did was draw in my legs and arms in closer to my body. It's just for the reason of security.

Softer words had the perfect opportunity to be said, but conversation was stopped abruptly. Yumi knew that the answer to the star question was a sensitive 'yes.' If talking was carried on the fear of another argument would've made us shut up anyways.

A long time passed. Eventually I let my limbs relax into a suitable sleeping position if need be. I didn't want to admit it, but I was tired. Irrevocably tired. I was drifting on the tides of slumber when Yumi finally said something.

"Reese...are you asleep?"

Should I answer?

If she wanted me to be awake, she would've asked 'are you awake.' Since she said the opposite, logically she wanted me to be asleep. Twisted philosophy? Maybe. But I apparently live by it.

I said nothing.

"You are asleep...," A hint of relief was in her voice. I tried my hardest to keep my breathing as rhythmic as possible. After a while she gathered enough courage to really start talking.

"I'm...really dumb aren't I?" she asked me—er, herself, "Running around and stuffing my mouth with way more than I could possibly chew...I just, I don't know. I, I used to be good you know," she gave a short exhalation, "I used to be strong. I was actually doing just fine until...until around the time you came,"

Around the time of the newscast...yeah. Yeah I can pretty much figure that out.

"I'm actually supposed to be a warrior, you know...there's this thing called Xana, and I—I mean, it sounds insane but, we fight him—that group of ours, you know? We fight him a lot. I like fighting him. It gets my anger out...,"

She paused, then changed a word in her last sentence to better describe what was really going on, "...got...my anger out...," Yumi sighed exasperatingly before continuing.

"But that's because he was the only one who fed my anger, really...then you came along and I began to push at you because I...hated you...

"Then, Nevaeh came...you were so different around her. I didn't know what to think. The more I saw you act around her the more I noticed how you acted around Aelita. You acted differently with her too you know...And though I shouldn't be saying this after admitting my hatred...but I was jealous of her. Of both of them. I wish I could know the side of you that was soft and warm and caring. I think, mostly because I needed someone like that. Someone outside my group of friends and my family. Someone _else_. William Dunbar...he's sweet, and concerned, and different, and...I just don't know. Ever since that...that boy left I just don't know. My confusion must've grown into the anger already there, and before I knew it I was eager to catch you in a bad position. I was so ready for that sparring match...

"Then I remembered your scars,"

She stopped, inhaled nervously, trying to shake the memory from her mind.

"And I knew there was something else going on behind the scenes. Something huge. I wanted to know at first—and I still want to know...but in a different way now. Ever since...ever since that man came, my thoughts have been...different. The scary thing is, it has nothing to do with the prejudice. I just...slowly I've been putting some pieces together, I might understand some things about you, but I...I just can't seem to bring myself to not fight...,"

Yumi gurgled some saliva, "No, that's wrong. I don't understand anything about you still. Even if I know who that man really is, I don't understand you at all. I don't like you. I don't like...but I...,

"I can't find anybody else...,"

There was a short minute of her sharp, pitchy breathing and my fake slumber-laden inhalations. Out of the blue she finally decided to say something that must've taken a tidal wave of strength to say.

"I—I'm too weak. Too stupid. I'm...I'm...I'm scared, Reese...," She choked out quite a few sobs, not even trying to stop them, "I'm so scared...,"

A short twist of pain and sympathy gripped itself around my heart as she said that. She thought she was hopelessly weak, having lost all of her strength from before. I didn't think so. She may have been a bit shaken up, yes, but underneath all of that visible stupidity was the truth that she was still as strong as ever—it's just the fact that the stakes have been raised to unimaginable heights. If anyone has gotten weaker over this incident, it's me. I'm willing to bend over backwards to _two_ sworn enemies just so I can keep my identity concealed. How pathetic is that? I'm letting them take my life away at their own free will. What happened to bring me down to that level?

"I don't know that song, by the way...," Yumi murmured, almost to herself, "that song that the computer virus Xana stuck in my head as he knocked me out...I don't even know why he chose that one. The way you seemed to react to it too...and your father, that man...,

"It gives me the impression that Xana even knows something I don't. Jeremy knows things about Xana, Odd knows more about you, Aelita must know everything, and the only one who doesn't have a single damn clue about what's going on. I'm hopeless,"

Her voice dropped down to near inaudible levels, "...and sometimes when I'm hopeless I'm also scared...,"

She sucked in a frightful, tear-stained breath and gave a shudder, "I'm all too scared,"

Jeremy was sympathetic. Aelita was stone-cold. Odd had formed a friendship. And Yumi was deathly scared.

I was left helpless.

She gave an uncertain moan, and before I knew it the ground scraped as she moved, "I don't know what to do Reese," she confessed, "But for some reason, as long as I'm with you when that man comes here, I feel...safe...,"

I tried not to tense up my muscles as her arms wrapped around mine, her head soon after gently resting on my shoulder. Through the jacket I could feel her tears present as she laid her head down. She closed her eyes and gave a gulp, then sighed, trying to calm herself for sleep even though her breaths were still shaky with fear.

"...safe...," Yumi whispered into the cave, a bat or two answering her with a few squeaks. A hard rock got caught in my throat, and I forced myself to swallow it quietly right before I broke my act.

"If you told me all of that," I said to her in a soft but normally loud tone, "then you've got more strength than you've accounted for,"

For a split-second Yumi stopped breathing. A surprised sound sputtered about on her tongue, and she couldn't speak. In my own little way of saying 'it's okay,' I took my arm that was wrapped within hers and pulled it away. Yumi still struggled to find words when I slipped the arm behind her and around her waist, pulling her in closely. In turn her head slid down onto my collarbone, a little more near to the heart. She muffled a few of her attempted words, and lost the power to speak.

"Besides...," I whispered warmly, dipping my head closer to her ears, "You'd be legally retarded if you weren't scared anyways...,"

A cheek muscle of hers twitched as if it was almost smiling. The sleepiness that resided within me finally took over, and my senses drifted away on my little boat, taking in one last thing before I fell completely away.

Yumi relaxed, letting her arms slide across my waist. Readjusting her position, it wasn't too long before she fell into slumber with me.

_Look around you for help--you will find it in friends, acquaintances, by accident, on purpose...you may even find help in your enemies if you are optimistic enough..._

* * *

I. Adore. Camp.

So. Much.

My favorite things to write: Searing Torture, and Awkward Love scenes. X3

Goodbye Horses. (Quid pro quo, Clarice...)

* * *


	19. First Scar

**Important Author's Note:**  
This chapter, as stated, contains 'nudity.' I do not dwell upon it, and I don't not make Reese dwell upon it with lust either--lust is the last thing on his mind. I want you to realize that sex has _nothing_ to do with this chapter. (I'm talkin' to YOU, peabrains) Reese is horrified of the nudity, and for good reason too. (Back to chapter four, peeps)  
If one person even starts to mention this, I will smack them upside the head and place them in a pit full of alligators. Seriously people. The world does _not revolve around sex!!_

* * *

Chapter Nineteen: First Scar

_Let the Guessing Games Begin_

Yumi's earsplitting scream of terror crashed upon my ears like a blow horn in my head. My eyes flew open to find myself in a pit of blackness, no floor, and surrounded by frostbiting onyx spikes. Nobody was in my sight save for the edgy blackness.

I've been here before.

Another scream shattered the dark and I turned on my heel to find two very disturbing figures. One was Reese. My hand instantly went to my cheek to find my scar gone. Reese was standing there, looking as if he'd be malicious this time around. He wasn't smiling, but the gleam in his identical lime green eyes told me everything. He was standing beside the source of the tortured screams.

Yumi was on her feet, but crouched way over, her arms crossed over her chest and her head hung down, strings of sick oily hair hanging down from her scalp. I soon realized why she had her arms around her in such a protective way. Her bare dirt smeared skin gave it away.

She was naked.

Relax, people, I've seen a naked lady before. Or don't you remember all those times I forced myself to help my mother after a few 'eventful' nights? After a few of those nights unable to cut sounds out from the room next to it, my immature thoughts about nudity were all switched around for practically the rest of my life. I wasn't at all lustful at the vision of a naked Yumi in my dream.

I was horrified.

Her feet were unexpectedly and suddenly swallowed up by a thin mess of squirming black tendrils. Another scream split from her lips, a few strings of saliva falling out. My body flinched backwards, my mouth revealing closed teeth in hoarse shock. The smallest hint of a thin smile crossed Reese's face.

"Seeing naked girls, dream-boy?" He asked, his voice identical to mine in real life.

"Wh-What's happening to her?" I whispered. Reese gave a scoff.

"Think hard enough. You'll figure it out," he copied. My lips wavered uncontrollably as more tendrils began to snake their way up Yumi's legs, dragging her down into...nothing? She gave a shivering, desperate moan as the tendrils got thicker as they climbed higher.

"Yumi...Yumi no! No!! Why? Why is this happening to her?!" I all but shouted. Reese rolled his eyes.

"Don't you get it?" he asked as if I was supposed to know, "Don't you see what's going on right in front of you?"

I looked at him, panic seeping through my eyes, "Why her? What's going on?"

Reese glared at me, and I almost took a step back. The look in his eye was fierce and accusing. I cowered beneath his anger as he continued, venom poisoning his tone.

"Why her? Because you pretty much picked her. What happened? You slept through her time of need. What's going on...?" He paused to lift a corner of his lip, showing sharp molars and teeth. "She's receiving the gift of consequence, courtesy of _you_,"

My throat tightened up. Something in my mind was bugging me, telling me that I already knew the answer deep down. I don't think I really listened. I would deny it anyways. Denial is always the easy way out—and at this point in my life, I really wanted an easy route. Yet I knew that I couldn't take it; I have to stand, and I have to stand strong for all those that I care for.

But how could I stand strong when all I can do is cry?

Yumi screamed again as the tentacle swathed around her waist. All of the sudden the burning urge to run to her side to comfort her overwhelmed my synapses and I willed my feet to full-out super sprint.

They didn't budge.

My mind screamed to lift a leg and move, but they felt like they were chained to a Giza Pyramid. Out of my mouth came a desperate confused cry at how unfair this was. Reese looked at me.

"Torture, isn't it?" he stated, "...well, since your mind is a tad on the precarious side, I'll relieve you of the guessing game," he 'walked' behind Yumi until he was on her left side before continuing. I watched his every move.

"She's bleeding in secret. She's hiding the pain. She conceals the secret...," Reese's left hand went to Yumi's shoulder. As he raised it up he revealed bloodstained fingers, letting the red glisten as he continued, "the secret of her spiritual fatality...,"

He rubbed the blood between his fingers, watching it drip down from them. He then paused, and stared at me.

"The first scar is the worst. It hurts the most. The first scar causes the tears. But by far, it is the downfall into fears,"

Yumi shivered and moaned, the tendrils starting to wrap up her torso. Her head finally rolled up, her eyes shut tight and her teeth gritted in discomfort and pain. As the blackness danced on her skin thin tears began to streak down her cheeks, and she unleashed a sob. All of the sudden Reese acted as if I wasn't there, and turned to Yumi.

"Don't fight against it, Yumi...It'll only hurt more...," There was an edge of pain and caring in his voice, "We didn't mean for this to happen...," he whispered solemnly. Pitifully Yumi shook her head and struggled, trying to break free. Reese winced and caught her arms, bringing them down to her sides.

"I'm sorry, Yumi, you can't do anything without making it hurt more," Yumi gave a defiant cry and tried harder. The tentacles became twice as violent as before, and the defiance turned to hurt. The look on Reese's face stated that he couldn't take it anymore, and to support that his arms wrapped around her neck and waist. A surprised shriek caught in her throat, and she turned her head away from him, still not opening her eyes.

"Stop it, Yumi...," Reese begged, "Please, just stop it. You're hurting me more than I'm hurting you—can't you see that? Please just stop, leave me _be_, Yumi, don't even acknowledge me anymore! Stop, please...or you'll die...,"

A disbelieving groan tugged at Yumi's lips, and she now edged to get away from him rather than the tendrils. Internal pain seared across Reese's face, and he refused to let go. His head dropped down, burying his face in her shoulder. A sting of anger shot through my heart, and all I wanted to do was strangle Reese. Just the way he was holding her made me want to puke in his face. I've had way too many experiences with that style to make me just look at it with disgust. I wanted to kill Reese now, more than ever. I'm pretty sure my face showed that too. That's just not the way you would ever hold her! I bided my anger, trying to wait until it was time to make my move. The two of them swayed together as Yumi fought against two things, but all too soon it was apparent that she gave up fighting Reese and just started to fight the blackness. It was all too obvious that she was incredibly weak. There was a desperate sob, but I wasn't sure who it came from.

Yumi suddenly stopped without warning, letting the tendrils take over. Another sob was released, and I realized that it came from none other than Reese. Yumi's face contorted in pain, then confusion, then pain again as he continued to be rocked by his own cries. Yumi may have been the weaker one by plain sight, but by far Reese was a mountain-load more unstable than her.

I felt the muscles in my legs begin to loosen up, but I still couldn't move. The feeling of that near-freedom though gave me the courage to finally speak.

"Reese, let go of her!" I snapped. There was something that resembled a pause in Reese's breathing before he looked up.

If this was the real world, I would've puked.

A smudge of blood was lopsided on Reese's lips, and his tongue was hanging out, the tip of it dripping with red. The way he looked at me was almost nonchalant, and it just fueled my anger even more. Blood from his tongue splattered down onto Yumi's collarbone, following down to the tentacles that eased their way up her chest, covering up her recent exposure. For some reason the blackness ignored Reese's presence and just went underneath his arms to get at Yumi. She rasped out what should've been a scream, but was far too weak to get anything else out. Another drop of blood dribbled down her collarbone, bringing me back to my senses.

"Let...let her go you sick bastard!" I swore, my stomach churning as we stared at each other. There was a long while where Reese and I said nothing, and the black tentacles never advanced. Then he finally spoke.

"You don't want me to do that," He informed, finally bringing that disturbing tongue into his mouth. His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed the blood, and I choked back a gag.

"Yes I do! Can't you see you're hurting her?!" I nearly screamed, wincing when my voice cracked. That's when I realized that the voice that I was talking with was the voice I possessed two years ago. This was Ulrich's voice, not Reese's.

Reese stared at me long and hard, his emotions too hard to make out. Then he sighed in what seemed like defeat.

"Perhaps I am...," he muttered, looking down in shame, "But I don't know how to help her any other way—I've forgotten everything. _Everything_. I've even forgotten...," he held back a sob and forced himself to spit the words out, "a mother's love...,"

Thorned vines of memory knotted my every muscle including my heart, making their way up my neck and to my head. Twinges of sympathy clawed at my emotions, and I couldn't help but pity him. Pity _me_, for that matter. A broken shudder shook Reese as he continued to murmur in between sobs.

"I can't do anything right. I tried to warn you, and I failed. I tried to push you away, and I failed. Now I can't even save someone who _isn't_ a part of me—or, not physically anyways. I can't do it. I just can't. All I am is a _failure_,"

There was no emphasis on the word 'failure', just a creepy twist of words. That entire phrase was Reese speaking out, but the word 'failure' didn't belong to him; it belonged to Lukas.

After that one word, Reese's arms slid away from Yumi and he melted into the darkness. Yumi shrieked in surprise again, and the tendrils eagerly took over, swathing around her like a swarm of ants to sugar water. One last scream of pain blasted past her lips before she began to sink.

"No...," I whispered in horror, "Yumi, no...Nooo!!"

At long last my legs were released into liberty, and I sprinted forward with all my might, for she was sinking far too fast. By the time I reached her she was chest deep in a writhing mass of cold, slimy, burning tendrils. Without thinking about the dangers, I plunged my hands down, hooking them under her armpits and struggling to keep her up. Cold frost bit into my skin, and seemed to burn it away. The frostbite saturated the skin so bad that it worked it's way into my blood system, feeding pain into my body. A loud scream fled from my mouth through gritted teeth, making Yumi squirm. She raised her face toward me and for the first time for the duration of the dream she opened her chocolate eyes.

"Ulrich...," she whimpered, "I thought you were dead...," Keeping my teeth gritted, I looked down at her, a calm kind of sorrow in my eyes. Yumi twisted her mouth, and talked again, only this time a lot more softly.

"No...you _are_ dead...," she concluded. I sucked back a cry. Her brow wrinkled in sad confusion, "I'm just...having a dream...,"

"A nightmare," I corrected, feeling tears flow from my eyes, "God Yumi, I'm so sorry...," I pleaded, lowering my forehead onto hers, "I _never_ wanted to leave you...ever...,"

She looked at me, sadness and somehow understanding in her warm chocolate eyes, "Isn't that the way it always works?"

I stared at her, biting my lip to keep from screaming out _It didn't work like that! I'm alive, Yumi! I'm alive!! Look at me, I'm Reese! Reese is fake, it's me, Yumi! It's really me!!_ ...but even in my dreams I was deathly paranoid. So what could I say? For some crazy reason it felt as if this was as much of a dream for Yumi as it was for me. What should I tell her?

"...Yumi...," She stared at me expectantly before I continued on. "I know you hate Reese. I know all of that. And Reese...hates you too—in a way. But...but I...I think you should just trust him—for now, at least. Until this is all cleared up, just...trust him. Please,"

Her eyes remained emotionless as she stared, breaking the silence after a minute, "...Yes. I trust you, Ulrich. If you say so, then yes...,"

Tears welled up in her eyes, and she copied me by biting her lip.

"I'm scared, Ulrich," she hoarsely whispered, "It hurts, and I'm scared. What's happening to me?"

I opened my mouth to say something, realizing that I didn't know how to answer.

"I don't know, Yumi...I don't know about anything anymore...I'm scared too...," I tipped my nose so it was touching hers, and though it tickled neither of us smiled. The pain in my arms was numb, and it disappeared before I knew it. There was a moment more of this quiet when a deep rumbling came from beneath us, and Yumi uttered a short cry in fear as she was jerked down so she was neck-deep.

"Ulrich—!!" She cried, looking at me with teary desperation, "Ulrich!!"

My mouth dropped open in shocked fright as my arms were literally pushed out from the mass of black, and before I could hear myself my mouth was screaming her name in succession over and over and over again. By the time I had stopped short, she was gone.

I let out a scream of frustration and rage and punched my hand down only to find that there was a net of tendrils that was _not_ going to let me pass through. I screamed again, and began pounding my fists into it regardless if it did nothing.

"We...lost her," Reese confirmed, standing to my left. I looked up at him from my crouching position, tears streaming down as he repeated, "We both lost her,"

I looked from him down to the spot that Yumi disappeared and gave a few more punches, sobbing as I did it. Reese shook his head.

"You're not going to break through. You're not strong enough. Neither am I. She's gone...there's no getting her back,"

I stared up at him again, the insane wheels in my head turning without consent. I stood up, wobbled a bit, and faced him.

"We're not strong enough, you're right. Not like this," I stated, my voice surprisingly calm. Reese connected gazes with me, and I noticed that he was falling apart from the inside out just from the way his eyes looked. I sucked in a breath, remembering that I was him and he was me.

"We can't do it like this. Not separate," I shook my head, the back of my mind teasing at how cheesy this sounded. Still, it brought light to Reese of what I was thinking of.

"If it doesn't work...?" He asked, stopping a few tears from rolling out by wiping them away. I shook my head again, getting rid of my own tears in that method.

"we'll cross that bridge if we get to it...," I looked up to see a glimpse of Reese's unbelievably sad eyes before the heel of his palm smacked my forehead and my head snapped back, my body falling all the way to the ground.

How long has it been? A second? A minute? An hour? Whatever the case, Reese and Ulrich had gone and I was just one again—which is a lot more comforting than being two. I let my hand scrape the ground, stopping when I felt the searing cold grip my fingertips. I inhaled a huge breath, and punched down.

To my greatest relief, my fist went through.

I didn't need another signal before I had dove in headfirst into the unbearable darkness.

It was like swimming in freezing oil—the temperature being a near absolute zero. Thankfully the oily substance didn't affect my eyes or breathing whatsoever—if you punch out the incredible cold then I was doing _great_.

Forcing my limbs to work despite the paralyzing numbness, I began to mechanically push my way through the desolate black, searching for any sign of Yumi. Was it five minutes? I don't know—I think it was, but man it felt like days. My limbs were all but useless when I saw a tiny thread of red in the black. It jumped out at me like I was seeing red again, but instead of horror, my heart lifted up to my throat in hope.

Like there was newfound warmth and strength in my arms and legs, I pushed forward with such might like there was no tomorrow. My goal was the thread. That's all I wanted was that one thread.

When I finally reached it (which was like a week later) I pulled aside the darkness, spreading it out as if it was the Red Sea. There, floating in spreading multiple strands, was a lock of dyed hair.

I felt like I should shout out in gracious glee. I almost did. Instead I reached out and grabbed the red lock as well as a few black strands and held tight to it, afraid that it was going to disappear before I could officially reach her. Involuntarily I gave a tug, and found that her hair was still attached since there was a reaction and a tug back to try and free her hair from my hand. A smile escaped me and widened out on my features.

I had really found her.

Keeping hold of her hair like it meant my life, I willed my near-lifeless body to move, pushing black slithers this way and that. After too long of a while, Yumi's face broke free and I could clearly see her scrunched features. A half-joyful cry escaped my lips, and I took my other hand, diving it to where her estimated right shoulder was. Yumi gave a jerk at first, but settled down as I grabbed hold of her arm and pulled her cooling body close to mine. She gasped and opened her eyes, utterly shocked.

"Reese...!" she managed to croak. I tugged and pulled away most of the tendrils, freeing her from going down any deeper. In fact, she was still sinking until I pressed myself close to her, not even letting air get between us. There was a unnatural moan of defeat in the air, and all of the tentacles retreated and Yumi was left liberated. Another shocked gasp sputtered past her lips as her chin was pushed onto my shoulder, my arms keeping her close. Whatever little warmth was still in her body began to bloom as I let mine flow to her. Sooner rather than later her body heat was back to normal, and the freezing darkness was only a memory in the vast distance.

"Reese...," Yumi said again, calmed down and sounding a little sleepy. I gave my reply to her in a shaky voice, never loosening my grip.

"I'm not going to leave you, Yumi...," I whispered, more tears falling down and soaking her cool hair, "Never ever...,"

A soft hum floated past Yumi's lips, and her sleepiness latched onto me. For the second time that night, we fell into slumber together again.

TIMELESS: You'll never grow old, You're timeless to me.

Timelessly Aelita

For once in my life I didn't awake with a start. The cave was daintily alight with the sliver of rosy-gold sunlight that beamed through the narrow opening, revealing rough slate-gray walls and little peeks at a few select bats as they sleepily squeaked and shifted about. It was only a few minutes after dawn. I blinked my eyes a few times, and looked down at Yumi.

Her head lay on my clavicle, nearly reaching my sternum. One of her arms had shifted so it rested just below her head. My shirt was wrinkled near it, indicating that at one point she had gripped and crumpled it somewhere in her sleep. Her lids were calmly shut in the solitude of sleep, and she took in deep healthy breaths. I pushed a few hairs back to better reveal her cheeks, noting that her mouth was ever so slightly open and small snores made that noticeable. A corner of my lip lifted in a smile before I brought it back down again while I was reliving last night in my thoughts.

Lukas was here again—for reasons unknown. Xana had knocked Yumi out and just by freak chance Lukas found her and tried to wake her up via knife slash. When it didn't work he wandered off again, then I came, found her, and hid ourselves with only seconds to spare. Xana couldn't have planned something _that_ perfect—it was all by error and wild chances. Wildly dangerous chances.

The thing I wanted to know the most was what Lukas was here for. Xana can attack anytime he want, that wasn't a concern of mine. It should've been, because he knows about the one song that really knocks my insanity free, but Xana was like a tick that hadn't yet embedded itself in the skin. All you do is flick it off and continue on. When I had learned of Lukas being her, that was more of a Lymes-infected tick stuck in the bloodstream. Not fun. I still haven't successfully torn that tick out of me, and it's really starting to (pun impending) tick me off.

My mind raced through the possibilities, burning forests to find out what he was really here for—since he couldn't have known that Yumi lay there, fully exposed to danger. Then again, how did _I_ know she was there?

I frowned, staring at my feet. I glanced down at Yumi again, noting how peaceful she looked, and remembering how frightened she was in the dream. I stifled a disturbed gurgle, and put my hands on her shoulders. Very carefully, so I wouldn't wake her, I pushed her so her back was supported by the wall and she was off of me and on her own. Noticing her discarded jacket, I picked it up and draped it over her so it covered her front like a blanket, silently staring at the makeshift bandage for a few minutes. After breathing on her for a minute I stood up and walked around for a bit, finally stopping a few centimeters in front of the opening, letting the sunlight drift onto a fraction of my body and face, part of it gleaming in my eye.

As the rays of the sun quickly got more and more gold the bats quieted down to a near silence. Yumi shifted a few times in her sleep as I kept watch of her out of the corner of my eye. Perhaps half an hour passed before she slightly lifted herself up and wearily opened her eyes.

The jacket slid down a bit, and after a second or two of reconciliation she caught it and replaced it back to where it was. Trying to catch a few more moments of rest, she sat there and closed her eyes calmly, inhaling deeply. I turned my head to focus on her for a few moments before turning it back to the sun, breathing as deeply as she was yet still watching her from peripheral vision.

She opened her eyes, directing them at her feet for a while before raising them up to me. She didn't notice that I was watching, so her gaze stayed where it was. Those chocolate eyes of hers stared at me for the longest time, the emotions changing with her thoughts; from curiosity to anger to sorrow back to curiosity, then finally contentment. Breathing a little more frequently, I lowered my chin and gaze just a bit still keeping it off of her. She blinked three more times, before shifting loudly enough to symbolize that she was awake and standing up. As she was she murmured something along the lines of saying 'awkward dream', thinking there was enough noise that I couldn't hear. I flashed my eyes in her direction for a second before letting them stare forward again. She brushed herself off, folded the jacket in her arms, and slowly approached, stopping beside and facing me.

"Thanks for the...bandage," she said softly, sounding like she was going to say 'blanket' before 'bandage.' As quiet as ever, I shook my head to say that there wasn't a problem to it. She was silent for quite a few minutes, probably gathering up courage and words to say something that must've taken a truckload of strength to admit.

I told her she wasn't as weak as she thought she was.

"Look...Reese, I've...been a little harsh to you—,"

"Both ways," I quickly interrupted for the only time. She stopped and gazed at me, then continued on.

"I guess it's just that...I don't know...the whole...kid-er, kidnapping thing...you know that doesn't happen every day and well...My head's been like, full of things, you know?"

_Just a little too well_...I agreed silently in my head.

"I—we...Can we make a pact?" she suddenly blurted. I turned my head to her, staring at her thoughtfully. She must've seen it because she pulled back a lock of her hair behind her ear—once again showing a true sign of nervousness.

"I, well, there was this...awful dream last night—you remember how I said I don't like dreams? Well, um, something happened in it that kind of...scared me?"

_Yeah. I know that just a little too well also._

Yumi gave an exasperated sigh and absent-mindedly muttered under her breath something about seeing ghosts. I cocked an eyebrow, suddenly realizing just what it was she was describing. Yumi was pulling things out of _my_ dream, only from _her_ point of view, meaning...

Holy shit. We didn't have the same dream, did we?

"A-Anyways...Can we just make a pact...like, say we don't fight or try to hurt each other until...until Nevaeh comes back...?"

My eyes involuntarily and instantaneously widened as she said that, the realization and shock showing through all too fast and too much. The realization of how hard it must've been for her to redeem like that, and the shock that she's willing to fully back down...for _me._ Did she really hear what I said to her in that dream...as Ulrich?

I shook my head quickly and multiple times, trying to get rid of the thought. Yumi blinked and planted her foot forward, lowering her head a bit.

"What?" she asked, the faintest hint of an edge in her voice, "What is it? Do you want to change—,"

"No," I said quickly, "No, it's fine—p-perfect even. I just...wasn't prepared for...,"

Yumi dipped her chin in knowledge and lowly agreed. Silence passed between us for the billionth time since we met, until Yumi sighed and put her jacket on over her newly made tank-top.

"It's gotta be at least seven, we better start heading back," she mentioned. I nodded, and after pantomimed decision I went first into the crevasse, Yumi following close behind. When she emerged out into the open behind me she stumbled and slammed into my back, instinctively clutching my jacket for support. I merely stepped forward once, stabling the two of us. Yumi muttered a slow apology, stepping back almost immediately. I turned my head so I could look back at her, letting my eyes betray no emotion. Her dark chocolate eyes suddenly focused on my cheek, examining the knitted and broken skin of my scar. Before she knew what I was doing I reached back a hand and grasped hers within mine. She cut off her gasp quietly, and sucked in a breath. I hid a smile, then started to walk through the forest, her hand enclosed in mine.

The entire trip back to Kadic was silent save for the snapping of twigs underneath our feet and the shrill songs of birds greeting the new morning. Yumi followed behind me, never complaining of my grip nor willing to let go. I wish that her reliance in me would've lasted longer, but we were nearing Kadic.

About ten meters away I gave her hand an extra squeeze, then let go, trailing off so it would look like we emerged from the woods at different places.

When we got to the courtyard it was ten minutes to class.

HEROIC: Hey, not all superheroes wear disguises.

I mean, Jeremy has Clark's geeky glasses and all.

Two days passed. Yumi and I said very little to each other, but that was mostly because classes interrupted most everything. On Wednesday Odd came back much to everyone's surprise, ecstatically explaining that the doctor said that the fracture was not a complete break, just a splinter of one of his bones. He wore one of those huge black plastic boots, but he was already walking around without crutches. Odd said that he had to convince the doctor to let him go without them—it actually took him an entire day, but he did it. The gang just has to keep an extra eye on him, because he does things that he's not supposed to. (You know Odd.)

Aelita still wouldn't talk to me, but the angry tension between us has simmered down a bit. Jeremy's actually been talking to me for once, but it's just been a lot of small talk. Still, it's a change that I've taken note of.

It's Thursday now.

Thursday afternoon to be exact. For the past few days or so I've been hanging out with the gang during free time, and that's what we were doing in the courtyard, hanging together and mostly studying. I had my physics book open as I was frantically trying to cram everything I could into my troubled brain, seeing as I couldn't concentrate in class due to recent obstructions. Jeremy was helping me whenever he thought he needed to, and Odd was lolly-gagging about and singing random songs here and there—some of them actually being Disney songs. Aelita was quietly reading a book off to the side, I think it was called _A Great and Terrible Beauty_ or something like that. It didn't look like a book I would be interested in.

There was only one thing missing.

Yumi.

She wasn't there at lunch either. Aelita mentioned that she ducked into the bathroom beforehand to take care of some business, so we all just shrugged it off for now. But it's free time, and she hasn't shown up since. In the back of my mind I wondered if she had gotten sick, but in the way that Aelita said '_business_' I'm quite sure she didn't go in there to puke or something. It was a possibility in the back of my mind, but for some sick gut reason it just didn't register nor pass for probable in my head.

The rest of the afternoon classes were spent with Yumi apparently absent, according to what William said after Odd asked him if she showed up to them. He shook his head and said that he was questioning this too, after seeing her in the morning.

The sun had already began to set, washing the courtyard with long shadows and amber light. Jeremy, Aelita, and Odd were off near the vending machines while I floated about nearby so I could eavesdrop.

"...maybe it was Xana?" Aelita suggested. Jeremy shook his head.

"Even with as powerful as he's gotten, he can't restart with an attack like that this early. After what Yumi said about the attack the other night, he wouldn't be able to charge up for as large an attack as that,"

Odd butted in, "But you never know. Have you checked Lyoko?"

Jeremy rubbed the bridge of his nose where his glasses were absent, "Yeah. Twice already in fact. I haven't found her there, in Sector 5, or in the Sea. She can't be in there, it's near impossible,"

"Near," Odd piped, trying to sound hopeful, "You said near, right?"

I would've heard more, but my phone rang out with a Subdigitals song, and I had to fumble for a bit before I flipped it open after getting it out of my pocket. I was a bit confused and surprised, since _nobody_ calls me, and I didn't recognize the number. I answered anyways, curious to as who it could be.

"Hello?"

"I knew you would pick up,"

My blood was instantly frozen. Well, why the _hell_ would Lukas call me anyways?!

"You," I growled lowly, "What do _you_ want?"

"Just a token of grati—,"

"I asked you what you called me for," I interrupted, unable to keep my anger in check. My voice was low so no one could hear me, but the sheer anger blew everything away.

"I just want to tell you—,"

"You haven't answered my goddamned question!" I snarled, pacing back and forth near the vending machine shed.

"Look, son—,"

"Answer my question and tell me _where Nevaeh is!!_" I demanded. Lukas gave a funny little sigh, then lowly stated something that made me keep quiet for only a moment.

"You'll listen to me soon enough—I have the force to do so," There were a few rustling sounds from that end of the line as I began to threaten him.

"Listen, you goddamned son of a bitch I want my little sister back and if I don't speak with her I swear I'm gonna—,"

A new voice was heard. It was weak, scared, and very, very shaky. As soon as it came onto the phone my anger vanished in to pure defeat as I realized that Lukas really _did_ have the force to make me listen.

"R-Reese...?"

My throat squeezed so tight I thought I'd die. Every last nerve on my tongue withered and perished within split seconds. I was facing the vending shed, but all of the sudden my arm was leaning on it for sheer support from how hard this really hit me. Sweat began to roll down my head in succession and my breaths became pants, making my spine tremor with every intake. My voice didn't sound like me, because it was so strained and quiet and horrified.

But it was me. And it was her on the other line.

And she was in Lukas's hands.

"Yumi...,"

* * *

There. See? Not too bad. It was all for the weakness and exposure, not for the lust.

Anyways, how y'all been doin'? Naw, I'm not from the South. I'm from Wisconsin! XD

So. Am I evil or _what?_


	20. Poison Luck

Most. Boring. Chapter. Ever. (cry)

Sorry for the long wait. When I started to write this I realized I didn't have the documented conversation for the beginning that appeared in I Will Remember the Others. So I stopped working on it for a while. Once I got the conversation right...I found out that this chapter was VERY boring. Maybe not for you. But it was SO boring for me to type.

Oh, and does anyone remember back in Chapter 18 I mentioned something about Silence of the Lambs? I only did that because they played a game of Quid Pro Quo. And then...Guess what was on Encore Mystery today!

Silence of the Lambs! Weeeeee!

* * *

Chapter Twenty: Poison Luck

_We're all mad here_

My throat shattered. Not her too. Not Yumi. Not my fiery Yumi.

Probably trying to sound casual, she choked out an unstable 'hey.' I would've commented more on how Yumi-ish this would normally sound, but the disaster factor in her voice stated that she merely said that because there was nothing else to say.

"Are you alright?" I whispered hoarsely. As soon as the lock broke loose on my mouth, I couldn't stop a sudden flow of questions that must've bombarded Yumi all at once, "Is Nevaeh there? Is she…is she alright too? Yu-Yumi…,"

"Yes…," Yumi answered softly with a hint of strong, hidden fear, "Y-Yes…we're both fine…," To me it sounded like she was blatantly lying. Just a thought.

And with that thought came a billion others. Relief lightly swept over me for only a moment as I freed the trapped air in my lungs in a poorly disguised sigh. They were…okay. Alive, at least. That calmed some of my nerves, but alive doesn't necessarily mean that they weren't hurt. It also meant that they could very well _get_ hurt. Oh Nevaeh, Yumi, I can't lose you. I can't let you get hurt. I can't let _anyone_ get hurt.

But I've succeeded so well at that, haven't I?

"God no…," I protested, way too much pain pushing through, "oh _God_ no…,"

My voice was quiet—nearly to a mute. Volume at one half. When Yumi answered me her voice soothed so much it hurt. She was okay—but she _wasn't_. God I was so...torn.

"Reese…," she said lowly. There was desperation in there, but her tone was tender, as if she was saying my name because it somehow comforted her. _My_ name. The _alias_ name. A part of my heart was sorrowfully ripped away, yowling all the way to rest beside Yumi, wherever she was. Why did she feel that way?

I think I was going to continue with our conversation somehow when the phone was taken away back to Lukas. I was physically unable to say anything else throughout the rest of the call.

"I think we've reached a point of agreement, don't you suppose? So far, no…accidents have happened, but keep going with that attitude, and there might be. I won't want to hear any more of this whining, because you very well know what I have here…,"

My stomach shrank. Oh I very well knew what power he had. And he was already wielding that power over me with sheer blackmail.

There was a punch of a button, and the phone on the other line was switched to speaker. The next thing I knew Yumi gave a sharp, pained gasp of shock and began to pant heavily into the speaker. Without control or consent a sobbing, shredded, helpless cry spat past my lips. I didn't know what happened, but I'll be damned—Yumi was in pain! If the only thing I could do was yell, then by God let my lungs _burst_.

Yumi shrilly said my name—probably knowing it couldn't do anything but saying so nonetheless. (For the comfort…?)

"Reese…! Reese…!!"

_Yumi Yumi I hear you Yumi God hold on please hold on Yumi!!_

"Ahhh…Ahhhhhh!" she screamed, gurgling some spit in the process. My body twisted and twitched in unnatural ways, making my own pain to compensate for hers.

"Nuh…Nyahhhuuhh…," I moaned, writhing in pain against the vending shed. It was no surprise that some kids started to stare at me suspiciously I barely registered them.

With Yumi gasping and wincing the far too near background, Lukas wrapped up his business.

"I think you understand. Don't try to call back—this number won't exist two minutes from now. I _will_ contact you again. Just be wary of that. If any one else finds out, they're _both_ dead."

Click.

Yumi's desperate voice echoed in my brain, and my lips began to tremble with great power. Somewhere in my scattered phase my phone closed and was tucked in my pocket. My sweaty forehead pressed against the vending shed, relishing in the cool relief. The heaves of breath I took in must've been extra loud, because Aelita spoke to me for the first time in forever in a worried voice from where she and the boys stood, speaking the question of many kids' minds there.

"Reese…are you alright?"

All voluntary actions completely shut down in my body, and it seemed to only be a miracle that I registered what Aelita was saying. I'm not sure what came out of my mouth as I threw my head back, but the best I can describe it would be a gurgled scream that held the emotions pain, rage, frustration, sorrow, longing, helplessness, and utter defeat. The world became a dangerous dizzy, and I stumbled away from the vending shed, seeing the ground, trees, and amber sky lazily smear together in my vision. A strong headache burst its way through as kids began to circle around me. Suddenly there was gravel in my path, and lots of it. Aelita gasped out my 'name' in horror, and with a swell of pain, the world went pitch black.

LIBERTY: Captivity means nothing with a strong mind.

As Yumi's is.

Soft wind was continuously being blown on my face with a cool, heavy wet thing plastered on my forehead. Of course those things were only meant for ill people, and it must've helped a ton, but jeez, my first thought was that the wind was _incredibly _annoying. The way it tickled my skin made me think of my latest dream with Yumi—

_Yumi!!_

My nerves crackled like the Chinese New Year, and I flung my body into a sitting position.

"Whoa!" A young female voice protested, picking up the rag that had fallen into my lap, "Lay down, there is no way you've recovered yet!" Nurse Yolanda literally forced me down back onto the infirmary bed, sternly scolding me.

"You're out for an entire night, then what do you do? _Flash!_ Just like that! You think your body can heal overnight?"

Overnight…? I've been out for over twelve hours? But that could mean—

"Hey, young man! When I say lay down, I mean _lay down_! Pay attention!"

I could've protested and fought, but she was right. When I said Chinese New Year I neglected the fact that the sharp popping noises and pain of the fire in the crack left a heavy burden on my noggin. Gaah.

Oh. I guess I wasn't aware of a third party in the room, because suddenly Aelita's voice broke the scene. I would've loved to see her, but my eyes weren't functioning right, and all I saw was four blobs: One white, one pink, one purple, and the other blue.

"Is he going to be alright?" the pink one asked nervously.

"Yes, well, physically anyways. Nerve attacks like that, causing you to pass out? Only he can decide—unless it's a severe disease, but I doubt it," the white blob comforted, still an edge of sternness in her voice. If I could've, I would've gulped.

"When will he be out of here?" The skinny purple blob quickly asked, sounding slightly anxious.

Yolanda was about to answer Odd, but the phone rang and she picked it up, made some small talk, then affirmed that she'd be right over.

"I don't know when, just be patient! If you'll excuse me, another kid has twisted his ankle. Oooh, that Jim, why does he insist on teaching an entire new class sloppy martial arts?!" With that, she stormed off—obviously in a mood this morning.

After Yolanda left Aelita sat next to my bed and began to talk softly, a little shaken for words.

"You, um, fainted, Reese," she began.

No crap?

The blue blob, Jeremy, began to explain with more depth, "It was like a severe anxiety attack—your body responded in the best way suitable to protect itself—fall unconscious,"

"Literally fall unconscious," Odd butted in, "it was like terror magic—one moment you were fine, then when you answered the phone you went white and rigid. Sort of like some psycho Hospital of Horrors episode—,"

Jeremy the blue blob shut him up before he could continue ranting. I silently thanked him—even if he did explain why my head hurt so much.

"I heard part of the conversation—forgive me for eavesdropping, but is everything alright?" Aelita said, her concern at its peaking point. I tried to say something to her, but to my fear I found speech quite impossible. I don't even know what I was trying to say, but it didn't come out pleasant.

After feeble attempts at it, Jeremy relieved me.

"We should try that one later—at least he's awake,"

The pink blob bobbed up and down with agreement, taking the rag off my head.

"Here, I'll get a new one for you—this one's a little lukewarm," Thank you, Aelita, the lukewarm is not helping my splitting head.

Almost the same instant she laid the refreshing yet cold wet rag on my head Yolanda reappeared, still in a very sour mood.

"You kids, you've spent enough time here! I don't care if you changed the rag, out, scoot! You've got classes to go to, skedaddle!"

Odd, Jeremy, and Aelita left without any argument, silently trudging off to their classrooms, each of them feeling concerned and a little regretful. Yolanda watched them go and closed the door tightly behind them, swinging around and mucking about her medicine cabinet once they had gone. Something had spilled, and Yolanda gave out a very rare curse. It was loud enough that if she had the window open, someone would definitely hear it outside.

Oh wait. The window _was_ open.

After hastily cleaning up the mess, Nurse Yolanda gathered up her composure and carefully selected a bottle of meds. As this was happening, the panic returned to me at last, and I began to breathe faster as I tried to pause and think of a plan that could get me out of here.

I _needed_ to get out of here.

Yolanda walked up to the bed and sat down with a cup of water. Frantic thoughts clouded my mind, realizing that all I had to do was roll off, move in some way…

But aggh, my head…

"Here, this will make you sleepy, but it will clear up the pain and by the time you wake you'll be able to move around, sound good?"

No, no it doesn't! I need to get out of here! Don't you understand that? Yumi and Nevaeh—

Goddamnit my head!

Yolanda lifted my face up from the back and tilted it forward as she put the pills in my weak mouth. They tasted awful. Failing to spit them back out led to my moaning and feeble flapping of the arms. The nurse, ready to have nothing of that, slapped my hands down and tipped the cup to my lips all in one smooth angry movement.

_I need to get out of here!_

The sweet water flowed into my mouth, taking the pills with it. Before I knew it they were too far down my throat and I was forced to swallow. I scrunched my face in disgust, and tried to break free of the bed.

"Don't fall off, I've had enough of you today. It would do me a big favor if you just slept,"

Yolanda's dry tone mingled with other noises as I realized too late that the more I moved the more energy I took, and the more susceptible to the drugs I became. I let out a final, disbelieving groan before my breath drifted off into drugged slumber.

FERAL: Born to be wiiiild

Oddly enough.

There was a wind again. I didn't like that wind. It caressed my face, as if gently saying _wake up, wake up now…_But I didn't want to wake up. That was the best sleep that I've had in forever.

Yolanda had her mood fixed up fabulously as she ran around, doing random errands while humming a vaguely cheerful tune. I watched her silently, strangely content. But there was something, something in the back of my mind…The medication she gave me did make me sleepy, that's for sure. But it cleared up the pain perfectly, just like she said it would. I blinked hard, clearing up the once nasty vision. Yolanda moved out of my sight to the other side of the room. I watched her for a moment, trying to think of why my mind was going berserk. I remember most everything…I feel like I just woke up from a million-year sleep though, and that'd get anyone truly groggy.

As she passed a table I noticed an old volume sitting on the edge. I stared at it for a minute, trying to see what it was from the spine.

It read _Macbeth_.

I shuddered. My sleep was free of that crap, but when I was awake it was plaguing me. What kind of a twisted world is this? I turned my head away and snarled as a voice began chanting in my head.

_Macbeth Macbeth beware Macduff!_

Yolanda turned around and noticed me. She walked over with long strides, a faint smile on her face.

"There, see? I bet you feel better now, don't you?" she proved.

_Macbeth Macbeth beware Macduff!!_

That damned voice kept going in my head. In return to the nurse I just stared past her, trying to mentally keep it away. Yolanda smiled and turned toward the door.

"I'll be back in a moment, okay?"

Each step she took was like an eternity in itself—and with each step came the phrase again.

_Macbeth Macbeth beware Macduff!!_

Who the hell was the first to say that to me anyways? Wasn't it Reese? Why was it going on _now_, of all times? I just had a good sleep for once—dreamless! I still can't remember what the important thing was, but…

Wait. Who else constantly called me Macbeth? I settled down farther into the bed, wriggling my bare toes. The blankets were underneath me, but they still felt comfy. I might as well try to sleep some more, since Yolanda is turning the knob and she'll—

_MACBETH MACBETH BEWARE MACDUFF!!_

_Yumi!!_

"_No!!_" I screamed, almost flying out of my bed onto the freezing tile. Yolanda stopped her hand on the handle, shocked. My mind suddenly exploded with everything that I had forgotten in my sleep. Yumi and Nevaeh were kidnapped. Kidnapped by Lukas. And Lukas had no qualms about harming them in any way.

I had to get out of here.

"Wha—Now wait just a minute, young Mr. Anders—just because you feel better doesn't mean—,"

My hand gripped hers beastly tight on the doorknob, suddenly fighting her to get it open. Like water evaporation, Yolanda's good mood disappeared like that.

"Sorry, bucko, but you aren't getting out here—not on _my_ clock!"

_Yumi…Nevaeh…kidnapped…Gotta get out…gotta find Aelita…_

Tick, tock, tick, tock. Yolanda put the theme in my head, noting that time was racing against me—and winning.

Tick, tock, tick, tock…

"If you'd like _my_ suggestion, _I'd_ get back in bed. This certainly isn't going to look good for you anyways, Reese Anders,"

_Hickory…_

I twisted my mouth. There was only one way to get out of here, wasn't there?

_Dickory…_

I stared her down, not releasing my grip. She returned the glare, not wavering from my eyes. I sucked in a breath, and murmured one thing.

"Sorry,"

_Dock._

My sharp elbow jutted into her stomach, causing her to half-way collapse on the ground, coughing hysterically. I struck the door open and bounded outside barefoot, my gaze wildly sweeping left and right. The sunshine was bright, suggesting around noontime. Panic settled in me. I had to hurry.

The infirmary wasn't that far away from the lunchroom. That was the first and most important place to look. At this time, they'd probably be there, Odd digging in like no tomorrow. I took off with little time to spare, the gravel digging into the soles of my feet.

When I got to the cafeteria I swung the door open and poked my head in, surveying the tables. Only a bunch of seventh graders and a few eighth graders looked at me strangely. I huffed a few breaths, and glanced at the clock.

Twelve thirty-six. It was free time. I pulled my head back while slamming the door shut, turning around and looking at the courtyard. They could be in their dorms, or in the woods. In the dorms would be taking way too much risk. There were monitors and teachers up there, and I was closer to where Yolanda could find me. That left no other choice.

To the woods.

Sticks and stones prodded at my feet as I blasted through the park madly. The more time I took to run, the more my mind became lost in psychotic hysterics. I didn't know where I was going, but if I ran into them then thank the lucky Gods I had found them.

The trees went by so fast they were just a blur of brown, gray, and new leaf green. Branches caught me in all possible places, but I always shrugged it off and kept going.

Until my right shoulder smacked into an oak.

My feet flung out in front of me from the momentum and inertia, swinging my back to the ground like a well-plotted Looney Tunes feat. I landed with a thump that lifted dead leaves up and around me from the air created. I gave a short groan and sat up to a kneeling position, massaging my shoulder.

"What was that?" a muffled voice not that far in front of me asked. My eyes and ears suddenly snapped to attention, listening intently.

"Probably nothing—you know how the animals are in spring—,"

"ODD! Enough! We don't need visuals!"

I'm now thanking the lucky Gods.

Without gathering any sort of composure or thinking about how a grand appearance would be, I forced my legs forward to run again. It wasn't long before I came to the aspen clearing where the remnants of the gang were sitting. I was right about making the grand entrance though.

Odd happened to be sitting in the perfect spot of entry, and with my mind and sanity the way it was it was _all_ too easy to trip over him and land somersaulting into the clearing. Odd screamed in both surprise and partially in hurt, seeing as I tripped over the leg in the cast. Aelita, who was sitting with her back to the tree, and Jeremy, off to Aelita's side, both stood up, instantly alerted. Aelita was the first to vocally respond.

"Reese…? Shouldn't you be in—,"

Giving total ignorance to everything else, I messily righted myself and began to crazily sputter the only vocabulary I could process.

"Aelita…! Aelita, Aelita!!"

"Yeah that's her name," Odd growled through gritted teeth as he clutched his leg, "Now what do you want?"

Mercilessly I took hold of Aelita's shoulders, making her gasp in pain unexpectedly. Jeremy started, watching my every move.

"She's gone!" I burst, "She's gone, she's gone, all gone, Aelita!! Gone!!"

"R-Reese, Reese, calm down, who's gone, what are you talking abou—,"

"He's got her!!" I screamed in her face, trembling and shaking, "He's taken her, he's got her!!"

Jeremy crouched down, ready to defend if need be, "Spit out what you want to say or we'll take you back whether you like it or not," he warned.

Jeez Jeremy. Since when were you the King of Sparta?

"Reese, please, just calm down and tell us what's going on—,"

Tears exploded from my eyes as I continued, my voice cracking on the last sentence.

"Yumi!! He's got Yumi Aelita! _He's got Yuuumiii!_"

Aelita went stiff in my hands as her voice levels dropped drastically, "Are…are you sure…?"

Snot started to crawl out of my nostril as sobs racked my body to the point of damage.

"Don't think I don't know her voice…!" I sputtered, "Lukas has Yumi…He has…he has…," I couldn't keep talking through the tears. Aelita gently took my hands off her as she and Jeremy put my back up against the aspen. Odd scooted so he was right in front of me, the pain washed away and replaced with interest and concern. Aelita stayed close to my right while Jeremy hovered on my left as she put a hand on my shoulder and leaned close to me, asking me through soft whispers at my ears.

"That was the phone call yesterday, then…?" she said rhetorically. I moaned to signify an affirmation.

"God…," Aelita cursed, "What did he say?"

I held my head in both hands and stared down at the ground, remembering all too well.

"If any one else finds out, they're _both_ dead…," I muttered sorrowfully.

Odd raised an eyebrow, "You're kidding right? He'd go so far as to kill his own daught—,"

"No, I'm _not_ kidding, Odd! You don't _know_ him, none of you _know him!!_" I spat, glaring him in the eye. He shrank back after quietly saying a quick apology. An instant pang of regret took hold of me, but I forced myself to ignore it.

"Is she alright?" Aelita asked. I shook my head.

"Yes. No. Maybe. I don't know…I don't know…,"

Jeremy realized why I was saying that, and kneeled down trying to ask as gently as he could, "…What could possibly happen to them? What is this Lukas capable of doing?"

I began to softly count the things he could do as all three of them leaned in to hear what I was saying. Jeremy took out a notepad and began scribbling it all down just for safe keeping.

"Knife…stove, burn…glass…boots, fists…graters…anything at hand…,"

I paused, running over the list again in my mind.

"That's it?" Jeremy said. I was about to say 'yes' when I was reminded of one simple thing. It never happened to me, so it wasn't stuck in my memory. Then again, I wasn't female.

The reality of it struck me faster than the sunrays, and my eyes shrank to dots while I went ultimately rock still. Odd was about to ask what was going on when my stomach gave a lurch. I clapped my hand over my mouth, and pushed Jeremy away so he stumbled backwards and fell. Turning my head to the side of the aspen, I released my hand and with the second lurch came whatever was left of my stomach—mostly some bile with a few remnants of yesterday's supper—toppled out of my throat and onto the forest floor. I winced and coughed, trying to get the awful burning out of my throat. Odd gulped and let out a low 'eww,' followed by a stern glare from Aelita. Thinking quickly Jeremy turned around and got the water bottle from his backpack and handed it to me. I coughed out a thanks and swished the water in my mouth, spat it out, and repeated that, cleaning up my face while doing so.

As I straightened up, Odd had the courage (or stupidity) to ask what that was all about.

I turned around and stared at him with a serious death glare, not intended toward him, and I think he got that.

"Nothing. Nothing at all. I'll just kill him if he…if he lays a hand on them. I'll _kill_ him,"

Sadly, it did not take long for everyone to figure out what I was talking about. Nobody spoke for the longest time. Nobody had anything to _say_ after that. Jeremy didn't bother writing it down—I figure that he didn't _want_ to write that sort of thing down. Silence reigned down on all of us. I put my head back against the tree and closed my eyes, trying to get the vision out of my mind and desperately trying to relax.

I was interrupted by Subdigitals music from my pocket.

All eyes suddenly went to me as I took my phone out, gave them a grave silent signal, and answered it with a dry "Hello?"

"…Reese?" Yumi answered, "This is your phone number?"

"Yes…," I said, lowering my head—my voice and emotion automatically relaxed into sadness.

"…Oh," she said matter-of-factly, "He's…He's in the house, he just…dropped this phone at my feet with a piece of paper…I guess it was your number he gave me…,"

I wrinkled my nose in confusion, "Why would he do that?"

"I…I don't know…,"

I dropped my chin in wonder. After a while of silence, I found something to ask her about.

"What…what happened to you last time?" I said lowly, "I mean, when the phone went speaker…,"

Yumi gave a shuddered hum before explaining, "He…grabbed my neck in such a way that he could control my movement somewhat…,"

I rolled my head back up and gave a moaning sigh, "Nothing else has happened?"

Yumi answered with an affirmative, and I felt the tightness in my chest release with relief, "You're…okay…,"

"For now…," she added, and I hummed in agreement, closing my eyes. Aelita, Jeremy, and Odd's eyes never left me as the conversation carried on. I felt some lone hot tears trickle out of my eyelids as I asked my next question.

"Can I…speak to Nevaeh?"

Yumi gave an apologetic gurgle, "She doesn't come out when he's in the house…she has this hiding place of hers…,"

I couldn't help but have a flash of a smile, "Smart kid…," I muttered, then for some reason thought of adding, "I…wish I was that small…,"

Yumi sucked in a breath, "Must've…read my mind," she commented. I smiled again, but then instantly dropped it.

"Yumi…," I said, for the same reason she called out my name yesterday evening. She didn't answer, just held the phone and listened to my breathing as I listened to hers. There was a heavy sound on the other line, and Yumi hastily wrapped up.

"Good-bye, then…,"

I squeezed my eyes shut as more tears flowed down, "Tell Nevaeh…tell her I love her…,"

Yumi gulped down something and said a positive 'okay' before hanging up. I let the phone buzz for a moment before closing it and putting it on my lap.

The forest was silent once more, me against the tree, Jeremy to my left, Aelita to my right, and Odd right in front of me. Nobody said anything as they drifted in their own worlds. Everything was silent like the break of dawn before the twitter of Jeremy's watch warned us that class was about to start.

As the three of them packed up I stayed sitting, praying for the two girls' lives.

* * *

(snore) Borrrriiiiiiing!

* * *


	21. Ultimatum

Posted a day later because this website was being a DOUCHE and not allowing me to log in.

WHY NO, LABYDWELL IS NOT ANGRY TODAY.

But it has nothing to do with the internets, so don't even think that it's only about this goddamn website!!

Anyways, enjoy it, you freaks. Reading is a better activity than chatting unintelligent speak with friends all day long anyways!! -anger vibes- NO. My anger did not come from me chatting all day! buzz off!!

* * *

Chapter Twenty-One: Ultimatum

_Lying in wait_

My heart was heavy with the apparent dark victory that Lukas held over my head. I was lost among myself with ideas, thoughts, worries, excuses and accusations. Slowly my feet dragged themselves over to Yolanda for instinctive reasons. I was half-expecting a scolding and maybe a detention, but when I got there I got something worse than all of that.

She was standing silent and straight-jawed next to the bed my…'friends' had carried me to. Her arms were across her chest in a business like way, though her facial features said nothing about business, only soft worry and hidden concern.

"So you did come back," she noted, her voice stable. I blinked and nodded slowly. "For any reason in particular?" She asked. I shook my head, but stopped midway.

"Lay down. Sleep, maybe. Still delirious,"

_Delirious is an understatement_. My mind shot.

Yolanda nodded and stepped to the side. I shuffled in to seat myself on the bed, but as I passed Yolanda, she leaned down and whispered in my ear like a soft, uneasy mother.

"If you ever need anything, just know that I'm here. I don't expect to know your story, not yet. Just know that you can talk to me, alright?"

Dammit. Nurse plus scars plus strange behavior equals bad.

I regarded her as an ignorant teenager should and sat on the bed. She stared at me for a moment, then left the room.

I swung my feet onto the bed, taking note of my shoes and socks underneath the end table. I inhaled a long and deep sigh, and closed my eyes. Maybe sleep would clear this all up.

After a while I realized there was a problem.

There was no way I was even coming close to sleep.

Frustrated, I punched the mattress and lay there, regardless of how my mind would torment me. I didn't need sleep anyways. I didn't need anything.

I just wanted a glimmer of hope…

VICTORIOUS: Picking out victories in failures

Picking out pink

Two days. Two days had disappeared, and I haven't heard from Lukas, Yumi, or Nevaeh since. Two days passed without a blink of sleep shown by the ever darkening circles underneath my eyes. Two days went by with no news from cops or anything and the rest of us cowering in paranoia and scrounging for anything to hold on to. Two days of solid nothing.

Aelita had told me that Jeremy used the voice changer at the lab to call Yumi's parents as Yumi, telling them that she'd be staying over for the weekend for studying, seeing as the kidnapping case was kept from public. As far as they knew, it worked for now. She told me this at the beginning of free time before she headed off with Odd and Jeremy to study together in the park and I stole away, locking myself in my dorm.

Still no sleep for me—not that I was dying for some, that is. I didn't want it—or seem to need it. Kiwi showed signs of worry for me, and though he was a dog—a _dumb_ dog—it clearly said that he knew feeling like none other. He wouldn't leave me alone for hours, always seeming to make sure I was alright. Through my reassurance I calmed him down—for a moment.

The music teacher wanted to hold a special meeting with select students from the class—students who apparently showed talent in the field of music. He invited them to come whether they wanted to or not. So I showed up after lunch Saturday afternoon.

There were about ten kids in there. Aelita and Odd were present, as well as Tamiya and a few other kids I recognized. I took a seat close to the door for an unknown reason. The other kids sat within their own groups around the room, fairly spread out.

The teacher began to talk about some sort of talent show coming up late in the year—around the end of May or so. It was barely April now.

About halfway into his suggestion about somehow getting together to do a music number, my phone buzzed and rang with Subdigitals in my pocket. I grabbed my pocket, suddenly in a cold sweat. The teacher glared at me and was about to approach me and confiscate my phone when I used my clammy hands to fumble with it, answer it, and blast out the door so clumsy and unexpectedly it left the room dead silent in confusion.

I almost answered one second too late. Lukas made that very apparent.

"Close call. I almost was about to revert to plan B…though I'm quite sure you wouldn't like the outcome of that…,"

I had to take a second to regain my breath before I spoke, "What…What do you want?" My voice was strained and quiet, not threatening at all.

I hoped.

"I think it's time we settled our…differences, don't you? I'll hand you the choice again between your darling sister and the Jap. Think of it as generosity from me, I wouldn't be doing this normally. Tomorrow at the same time it is right now I want to see you on top of the old abandoned factory near your school. You heard me. On the roof. Not a second early, not a second late. I'll be there with the two prizes. Come early and witness their death—come late and see the aftermath. I have the gun—and you should know it wasn't easy looking for it after you threw it in the damned woods."

That's what he came to Kadic for that one night—the gun. I shoved my face nervously to the window of the music room door, staring desperately at the clock with wild eyes.

Twelve forty-five.

"Are they okay? Please, just let me speak with them…,"

Lukas's voice sounded as if he gained a scowl on his face, "You'll see. Tomorrow. Factory roof. On the dot,"

I sensed the hang up coming and took my face from the door, bursting.

"Wait!" I nearly screamed, "Wait! Let me speak with them! Let me speak with Yumi! Please! I just want to talk—," Click, endless beep, "…with them…,"

I took the phone from my ear and stared at it, letting the dial tone drone monotonously until I finally closed it shut.

"…No," I whispered in useless protest.

Two minutes later the kids started trudging out from the room—some of them staring at me, but most of them ignoring. Aelita and Odd made eye contact the longest, sensing and knowing what had gone on. Before they could close in the music teacher, mustache, glasses, goatee and all, stepped in between them and me, eyes flashing.

"Hand it over young man," he ordered, holding his hand out, "You know phones aren't allowed in or around class!"

I winced. I figured that Lukas had finished his business over the phone with me, but I could never be sure of that or anything when it came to him. But if I disobeyed the teacher, he might give me a punishment that would disallow me from being there at twelve forty-five. I noticeably bit my lower lip as I struggled with the decision. Picking the lesser of two evils has never been and never will be an easy choice.

Which is why I wanted to fall to my knees in worship when Aelita decided for me.

"Mr. Polowski, please—his, uh, mother is in critical condition at the hospital, and updates are random and urgent—If it was possible to give him a break…,"

The music teacher stared at Aelita for too long of a while, contemplating. Odd shifted on his uneven feet during the silence as the teacher looked back between me and Aelita. Finally he sighed, and looked at me over his glasses.

"Just this once—you hear? You should've told me about it beforehand, okay? Until next time, Mr. Anders," He gave a curt nod, and I numbly nodded in return. He locked his room, then walked off to the break room. Aelita and Odd came forward then. I couldn't stop myself at that point.

"Oh God, thank you…," I hoarsely whispered.

"You don't need to call her God, y'know," Odd said, though his face was solemn and his tone gave away his seriousness. No one smiled at his joke, though it was quite zingy for once.

Aelita nodded gravely in return, not expecting me to tell the events, but asking anyways.

"So what's the news?"

I glanced around, and although no one was around I grimaced and bit my lip.

"Not here—_anywhere_ but here,"

Odd searched the area with his eyes as Aelita agreed.

"Jeremy's room is safe. Let's go. If we're caught we can say that we were studying for Criminal Justice class,"

While contemplating the option I noticed Sissy and her goons approaching nearby. It wasn't that hard to make a quick decision when I saw _her_.

"Yes," I said, "Yeah, that's perfect. Let's go,"

Aelita and Odd bordered me as we power-walked past them. Sissy's suspicious eyes followed me for a moment before she apparently lost interest and continued to walk, prissiness in her step. I tried to ignore that.

Odd didn't pause a second after knocking on Jeremy's door before walking right in with authority. Jeremy jumped and turned from his computer, startled. When he saw me his expression turned halfway to dark stone, but he hid it well.

"What's up?" he asked, concerned, "Did something…electric happen?"

Aelita and Odd both shook their head, Odd using his smart-mouth.

"Only slightly so—not in that way," then added, "Reese here got a…call. From that one guy,"

Jeremy's hard expression released somewhat. He stared at me with sky blue eyes that were unmasked by glasses, then glanced up at Aelita before turning back to me.

"What did he say?" he asked. I tried to keep my limbs from trembling before I launched and quoted the entire conversation word for word. Aelita, Jeremy and Odd all listened intently as I closed my eyes, recalling every last detail that I could—even the sound effects. It was all etched in my brain.

"He…he hung up without letting me speak to them…," I finished finally, plopping down next to Odd on Jer's bed, "I…I don't even know if he's…done anything to them…," I cupped one of my hands over my eyes while staring down and massaged the edges of them tenderly, wincing although it didn't hurt. The three that made up what was left of the gang stared off in silence—Odd directed at me, Aelita out the window, and Jeremy just off into nowhere. I heaved in a few shaky breaths before Jeremy tried to stop the disturbing quiet. I thanked him telepathically.

Because I was really starting to hate silence.

"So is that it then?" He said, grabbing his glasses and polishing them as a diversion for his hands, "Just…show up? Go along with what he says?"

"I can't see how we can maneuver around it," I lowly answered, "Anything slightly off color and…,"

Odd let out a disturbed mumble and stood up, beginning to pace, "That _can't_ be it—We gotta think of something, some way to get around him—Wait, Jeremy, what if you…If you activate a…you know…,"

Jeremy stared at him, "Odd, no. I can't. First off, it would…expose it to people we don't want. Secondly, you know who would jump on that advantage and just make things worse!"

Odd stared, scowled, and burst at him, "You think I don't know that? I do! But this is our _friend_, a teammate, someone that we can't lose! Ever since…that guy left we've been struggling, and without Yumi it'll be even worse! Aside from that, there's a little girl with her life on the line as well! _Little. Girl. Jeremy._ I don't think any of us could live with each other if a little girl…well…if that happened on the very roof of _our_ factory!"

"I _know_ that, Odd!" Jeremy argued, frustrated with himself more than his friend, "I _know_ what's at stake! But for once, I can't turn things around! The safest way we can do this is to stick according to Lukas or whoever's plan! It's the only way it'll work…,"

Jeremy sighed and sank down into his chair, depressed. Odd gazed at him, trying to figure out if there was a way—_anyway_—to make it a better situation. He finally snarled at himself and kicked at the closet very hard with his ridiculously big boot. Snarling viciously at himself again, he dropped to the floor and clutched his leg, hurting but still very angry and not for the pain either.

"Odd," Aelita chided, "Don't do that!"

"I don't _care_ what I do, because apparently nothing I do will help Yumi and Nevaeh, huh?!" he growled angrily. Aelita looked at him very sympathetically and wrapped her arms around her, breathing deeply to keep calm.

"I know…," she said softly, "I'm…I'm scared too, Odd…,"

Odd paused and looked up at her, the sun twinkling on his piercings. Half of his look was a glare, but the other was a mixed feeling of agreement. Jeremy let out a whoosh of air, and laid back, rubbing his forehead. I looked away.

What Aelita just said went for everyone in the room—no matter what their position was within the group.

After a while Aelita spoke up again, this time a little louder but with no more hope than she did last time.

"There are…a few things we could prepare for," she muttered, "Jeremy, Odd and I could go early…maybe even sleep there tonight. Jeremy, this would be for—,"

"—A return trip," he confirmed. Aelita nodded.

"And for video surveillance. Just in case. Reese, we'll need your number for contact if you have the time to do so,"

I nodded slowly, even though my brain highly doubted that I would be using my phone for anything unless Lukas called again.

Jeremy swiveled around to his computer to fix a few things on the screen, the keyboard tacking with his fingers. After thirty seconds of pause, Aelita lit up with another idea.

"Oh…I know the com to Yumi's gym locker…I mean, that's where she's storing the—the…,"

"His sword…," Odd finished, "Do you think we could use it? Is it of any use?"

Aelita shot a glance at me, and tucked her chin down, "Yeah…Yeah there's someone in the room who I know is skilled at that sort of thing…,"

Jeremy immediately stopped typing and slowly turned to look at the pink-haired girl, then after a while switched his gaze to me. Odd caught on and looked at me also. Aelita took in a big breath and refrained from joining in on the staring contest. I shook my head and stood up.

"It doesn't matter if I can wield a sword or not—if I don't get the opportunity right, it'll be useless. He has the gun," I said straight to Aelita. Her features tightened up as if it hurt to hear that even though she most likely knew that already.

"Still…," she whispered, "It's always better than nothing…,"

That awful quiet once again erupted in the room, only to be disturbed by heavy footsteps and booming knocks on the door.

"Belpois! Are you in there? Mail call! You got a letter from your parents!"

Jeremy nonchalantly called to Jim, saying that the door was open. The handle turned downwards and the proud sweatband bearing gym teacher filled the empty space, gaping at the scene.

"What is this here? Stones! You know that you're not allowed on this floor!" He said, pointing straight to Aelita.

"Yes I know Jim," she said, forcing a fake smile and tone, "We were just studying Criminal Justice together, that's all," she lied. Jim didn't catch it, so it's all good.

He blinked his eyes in dim confusion a few times before he straightened up and cleared his throat.

"Well, yes, studying together is a good thing, only I can't understand why Della Robia is on the floor like that, and um, Anders, you got a letter today too. Just came in, in fact," He waved a envelope in front of him, "Should I give it to you now or—,"

"You can…shove it under my door…," I said quietly. Jim nodded and left the room, leaving Jeremy's letter on the pillow of his bed. I stared at it for a while, then blinked.

Something just occurred in my brain that told me that something was way off. Odd voiced that out loud for all of us.

"Wait…so, um, who'd you get a letter from?"

I shook my head. I didn't know.

Jeremy went over the plotted plan for us for Sunday two times, making sure we knew every detail. He and Odd were going to sleep in the factory tonight, and tomorrow I'll come to the factory with Jeremy's directions that he gave me, with Aelita meeting me before hand with Yumi's (or, should I say, my) sword. I could conceal it underneath my jacket as I approached the factory, just in case he was looking over the edge of the roof. I'd make it there by street and not sewer. Smart enough.

After the second time of running through it, Jeremy gave a little glance to both Odd and Aelita, and Aelita turned to me.

"Um, Reese, we've got some planning to do that kind of needs to be…alone,"

I recognized the flash of eyes as soon as I saw it, but acted as though I didn't know it. I nodded to her and without question I left the room, closing the door softly behind me.

Proceeding to my room took next to no time at all. I opened the door to find the letter carelessly laying in front of my feet, and I picked it up, finding no return address or stamp—just a simple name of 'Reese Anders' scrawled on the front.

Here's the kicker: My name was enclosed in noticeable quotations.

Whoever this was definitely knew about my alias.

Feeling heat rise up in my throat, I sat down on my bed, ignoring Kiwi's hellos. I was slightly nervous, but my curiosity overcame that quite easily. Kiwi soon became bored and padded off to lie down. I slowly ripped the envelope open and took out a folded sheet of paper.

I unfolded it, took a glance, and brought the sheet to my face, shutting my eyes desperately tight. It got crinkled a bit, and even though I didn't want to harm it in anyway, I let it happen.

My face creased back in severe sorrow, and tears began to leak their way out silently.

Odd walked in a minute later, starting up as if he was going to ask me something in a normal tone, but softened when he saw me for real.

"Hey Reese, I—…Reese…?"

He stopped in the doorway, inspecting me. Slowly approaching, his voice got to a concerned level as he too ignored Kiwi.

"Reese…? What is that…?"

I didn't reply. I couldn't. The pain was too much. As he approached I didn't move whatsoever. He could see my tears, and stared at the sheet—knowing that it was the very thing that caused that.

When he got close enough he tentatively grabbed the top of the paper, wanting to see. I didn't stop him as he carefully and slowly took it out of my hands.

He remained silent with a touch of grim knowledge as he stared at the paper. With time he lowered it, and stared at me.

Sorry empathy was truly shown in his eyes as he gently placed the sheet face up on my lap, kneeling down so he was level with me.

I watched as one of my tear drops fell onto the paper, soaking into my baby sister's crayon drawing of her and me holding hands in a field of sun—the both of us smiling.

* * *

Okaaaay...

I think I'm slightly better now. If only.

It'd be better if I didn't walk or bike anywhere today. I'm gonna stay inside and write/draw.

Thank you.


	22. Stairway to Heaven

**Author's Note!** This Chapter should be read after re-reading Chapter 1 and once that is done and you are ready to read this? Read it with a copy of Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven lyrics right next to this.

Seriously.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Two: Stairway to Heaven

_All that glitters is Gold_

"Hey…um, Reese…I've got something for you,"

I turned my head away from the wall ever so slightly on my pillow just so I could see Odd's face. Sniffing at him, I turned back, staring at the picture that was tacked up on the wall six hours ago at one o'clock. My jacket lay in a careless tussle with a sleeping dog on it, leaving me to stare at the picture in peace without the heaviness of the coat.

"C'mon, Reese, it'll only take a second," Odd pleaded. I looked back at him with my peripheral vision again, and sat up, facing him as emotionlessly as ever. He held something behind his back as he talked to me, his eyes just a tad on the watery side.

"Look, um…What's happening tomorrow—it's big. Really big. And um…you never know what could happen when you go there…," He sucked in a breath before continuing, "And sometimes you can't say good-bye when a bad thing occurs…,"

Odd blinked, making his eyes more watery, "And um, I want to give this to you. It belonged to my good buddy Ulrich. He was—like you, I guess—a talented sword wielder. And one night when we were hangin' out I found this for him, and after he bought it he never took it off…until he left,"

He brought his hand out with a choke; enclosed within it was the dog tag I had left behind so long ago, the word SAMURAI still perfectly embossed into it, the pewter shining like new. It had been taken care of well.

"I…I want you to have it Reese…I know we're not that close, but you've done a lot of things that justifies you having this. Tomorrow, you're gonna be a knight in shining armor for two girls up on the roof—I think it's only appropriate if you wear this…,"

I stared at him for a while, "But I can't do that," I protested, "I can't take that, Odd, you love that thing,"

His eyes expanded for a millisecond, then returned to normal. He did recognize it. I quoted the exact same words he said to me when I passed the dog tag onto him. He shook his head multiple times to rid himself of the memory, a stray tear escaping.

"Here," he said with finality, "Take it. Wear it. I have to go to the factory. Watch over Kiwi for me, okay? Later…Reese…,"

Odd dropped the dog tag in my lap and quickly left, his boot clomping as he walked quickly down the hallway. I stared at the door for a minute before I picked up the tag, staring as it dangled from my hand. Kiwi shifted in his sleep, ruffed, and settled back down. I took a short glance at him, then sighed.

The cool metal chain felt good against my neck, the top of the tag reaching just past the end tip of the yin yang shard under my shirt. I fiddled with it for a while, running my hands over SAMURAI maybe just a little too much.

_Tomorrow, you're gonna be a knight in shining armor for two girls up on the roof._

Was I really a samurai again?

LOGICAL: Live long in prosper.

To Jeremy, logically.

The sunlight made everything glitter from the dew, changing every object into gold. Everyone—including the ladies—was absolutely sure that it would be a marvelous day.

Except for a select few.

I actually got a few winks of sleep while I was staring directly at the picture, memorizing each and every detail. The sun's outline was a near perfect circle with neat rays, as well as the grass being a trim zigzag all across the paper—indicating that a certain older girl helped my sister create the picture. On the top was a neatly printed 'To:' corresponding with the bottom 'From:'. Yumi wrote those as well. The rest was all done by Nevaeh. The sun was messily colored in with a bright yellow as was everything else the work of a toddler—from my head to her toes. Up above next to the 'To' she wrote 'Brugger' as best she could, spelled the exact way she said it too. That must've been Yumi's doing. Down at the 'From' she wrote her name spelled correctly, taking up lots of lopsided space underneath the grass. It took me an hour to realize it for the first time, but underneath Nevaeh's name was a very small, very concealed scribble of Yumi's name in Japanese. It was apparent she wanted it to be an art piece by mostly Nevaeh and have next-to-nothing of it. I think that she didn't want to barge in on our moment.

How little she knew.

I let my fingers graze the precious piece of paper, caressing Nevaeh's supposed face. Sighing heavily, I forced myself to get up and get dressed.

As I padded down the dormitory stairs I heard lots of small talk, some people mentioning that stores were closing because of the fantastic new spring day that it was supposed to be. Shaking my head, I tried to ignore it—knowing that I could get what I wanted with only a word without the stores.

Signs on the wall passed me by throughout the entire morning—during breakfast and brunch. I skipped lunch for the one reason I'm sure you don't need explaining for. Aelita skipped with me, grabbing the sword before we ventured out to the aspen one last time. I wanted to be sure. She wanted to be sure.

This was our last meeting.

"I…I'm sorry…," she muttered under her breath to me. I stared at her.

"That word could have two meanings," I replied, and she turned around to look at me, her aqua diamond gray eyes pleading with tears.

"I truly am. What I said when Nevaeh was first…I'm sorry—I shouldn't have—,"

"Aelita," I stopped her with authority. Nearby a spring brook babbled close to the tree we were at, "Stop. This is our last meeting here—or, it may be. I don't want it to be like this,"

"Well I don't either!" she proclaimed, throwing the sword on the ground, still in its sheath, "I don't want it to end here! I don't want it to just…stop like this! If you…if you die, just like this—then who will, who will…No one knows who you are Reese, and if you die like this you won't be remembered like you should be remembered! Only I will remember you the way it should be! Only _me!_ And everyone else will go on about their lives, just thinking you were…were…," She sniffed, and sobbed, "Reese Anders…and nothing more…,"

Some sort of songbird sang sweetly in the distance as there was a short pause before I picked up again, my voice soft.

"Aelita…I have to do this—to save them. If I don't come out alive, who cares. Ulrich is already dead. If Reese dies, it won't matter. Not a lot of people like me, Aelita. And it'll just be you who knew the reason why,"

"What is the reason…?" she asked the two of us, "What is the reason why no one likes you? Reese, I—...Ulrich…," She sniffed again and wiped her nose with her sleeve, "I don't want you to go again…We need you—ever since you left the first time we realized just how much we needed you with us—both because of Lyoko and because of friendship. Ulrich, if you don't make it out of this alive, I'm not sure what I'll…what I'll do…,

"I'm scared, Ulrich, I always have been. And now that you may actually die soon, I…I just don't know…,"

I remained quiet to her thoughts, seeing as it was the best idea at the time. Then again, my thoughts on hers could've been misgiven. She continued after gathering her voice up again.

"And look at what I've done for you…next to nothing…,"

"Aelita!" I cut her off with shock. Nothing? She didn't have the faintest on what she had done for me!

"Well, it's true, isn't it?" She shot back, tears scrolling down her face.

"If only you knew how it wasn't!" I said, trying to hide my surprise, "Aelita, if you hadn't have been there when you had, Christ, you don't know how fast I would've gone insane. I was terribly bad off when I first came here, and who knows what would've happened before I met Mrs. Periwinkle—if I was to meet her and Nevaeh at all! What's more, you held down Yumi's sanity as well as mine, making sure that while we remained enemies we didn't tear each other apart—er, correction, _she_ didn't tear _me_ apart. I don't think you understand your role in this, Aelita. You've been the greatest help I could've ever asked for. It just makes me wonder why you think that you're not…,"

Aelita bit her lip and turned away, unable to look at me anymore.

"It…really makes me wonder,"

She spoke in a half-audible whisper, "I don't know, Ulrich…Sometimes…I wonder about myself too,"

The songbird continued to sing at the brook as Aelita kept her face turned away for a given amount of minutes. Then without warning she faced me, stared into my eyes for a few seconds before completely bursting in sadness.

"I'm sorry!!" Aelita cried, taking a few steps forward and wrapping her arms around me, sobbing into my shirt. I stayed my ground, and waited until I returned her hug. She was my friend. She'd always be my friend. And if it came to be that I'd never see her again _after_ pretending to be someone else…I don't know. Nobody knows anything these days.

"I'm sorry Ulrich…I really wish I could help you…but I…,"

"Aelita…," I shushed her, "Shut up,"

She jolted and I think maybe a laugh came out of her mouth. Either that or a wince. Whichever.

Her sobbing continued a little while longer before she picked up where she left off.

"Ulrich…no matter what happens…I guess—as long as you're happy…," She looked up at me, forcing a smile on her face, showing her teeth. Tears worked their way around the creases of her smile, enhancing the emotion and truth in her voice, "I…I hope you're happy, Ulrich. When it all comes down…I hope you're happy…,"

There was a feeling I got as I stared at her, but I couldn't name it—couldn't match it to a different time. It felt nothing more than an excessively strong friendship bond.

"Thank you, Aelita…," I whispered to her, "Thank you for everything…,"

RESPECTFUL: In the world today, a shred of respect is a diamond

Yumi is in a thousand ways a diamond

I looked to the west with the sword sheath in my hand, my spirit crying for leaving. I couldn't stand it any longer. Looking back at Aelita, she gave a slow affirmative nod. I blinked back in response to her, and sped out of the gates to the surprise of the once sleeping gatekeeper. He yelled at me to stop, but I didn't hear him.

I hardly heard anything at that point.

As I dashed through the city streets I saw in my thoughts visions of what it would come to be if I was late—or, terribly, if I was early. I didn't have a watch or a clock on me, so it was all by what Aelita had said.

But I didn't have Aelita with me anymore.

That statement was like a straight message sent by rings of smoke through trees. _You don't have Aelita with you anymore._ I was alone.

For the first time since I had met the entire Lyoko gang…I was alone. When I had left I was with my mother, when I came back after my mother had died I had Aelita. After Aelita came Mrs. Periwinkle, Nevaeh, and Sarah. Then gradually Odd and Jeremy came—even if one of them held a grudge. Then came Yumi.

But they aren't with me anymore.

Mom is dead. Aelita had to stay behind for safety reasons. Mrs. Periwinkle had her hands full with the remaining toddlers. Sarah was in critical condition still at the hospital. Nevaeh was kidnapped along with Yumi. Odd and Jeremy had to watch everything from a distance.

I was truly alone in this one.

The voices of people that stood looking at me as I raced past flew over my head in a blended mush of noise, not one of them registering in my head. Some part of me wondered about their conversation and whether it involved me or not, but most of me ignored it—pondering about the events that were going to follow.

Nevaeh. Yumi. I need to save you. Desperately. You are the only ones I have left. You are my family, and if I lose you, I'll die regardless if my heart kept beating.

My teeth smashed down on my lip, drawing pain and small amounts of blood. Not now. This was not the time to get choked up. If I started to cry or show that sort of emotion my thoughts would be clouded. When I get up to the roof I won't think straight—I'll be acting on emotional instinct instead of survival. Emotional instinct would make me do stupid, senseless things causing either my death or one of the girls'. Survival instinct might cause a death—but it would be for a much wiser reason as well as my thoughts wouldn't be clouded throughout the entire thing. I dug my fingers into my eyes, and growled deeply from my chest—forcing the tears away with raw anger. I whispered to myself that it would be coming soon. Soon…

I tore my fingers away from my face just in time to crash into a fellow pedestrian. She gave a short cry of protest before I righted the both of us, murmuring a very speedy sorry before launching off one leg into another long-stridden run. The only thing I noticed from the girl that I slammed into was a flash of reddish hair. It made me wonder…

Concentrate. You need to do this.

I focused on the road spewing out in front of me, my mind inadvertently directing itself to a calling tune of a certain song I never wanted to hear again. In response extra adrenaline flowed through my veins courtesy of rage and my pace quickened by just that much.

Lukas was the name of the piper, and I was one of the children following him. The way he said it made it sound like the piper would lead us to reason—but personal experience told me and everyone else wise. He would steal our souls before the new day dawned even if you stood for very long.

The trees of the nearby forest seemed to echo with his laughed. I scorned at them, keeping my gaze paying attention of what was ahead of me. The hedgerow that divided the park from the row seemed to bustle, but I wasn't alarmed. I had a goal, and by God I was _going to reach it._

I had a choice though.

I could take another path. At the time I'm not so sure I knew what it was—well, I did, but I didn't really dwell on it long enough to really separate out just what it meant. I didn't want to. There was still time to change the road that I was on—but if I did that…

Walk away. Don't bother with this. Leave it to a return trip and just…take the other route. Easy street is happy street. Right?

But in the long run I'd kill myself.

Yumi. Nevaeh. I'm coming for you. Please hold on. I promise…I won't even make you wonder.

My head ached and hummed with worry and with half of it screaming to go the easy way. I understood that it would never go even if I tried. I just took it as a call from the piper.

I was going to kill that piper.

Hearing the wind blow past my ears just gave a reminder of the emptier airspace ahead. Was I getting close? I checked the street name.

Only a few jogs away.

The stairway in the factory's call lay on the whispering wind.

I wound on down the road until I hit the bridge full blast. The sword strapped across my chest lay concealed underneath my shirt and jacket—the hilt tilted so it followed my shoulder's broadness. The slight itchiness of the leather on my skin had to be pushed away as my footsteps pounded on the metal, somehow finding their way to the roof staircase on their own. The light that had cast long shadows taller than my soul disappeared as I dropped into a corridor leading to the stairway. It lead to the girls they all knew.

Flashbacks attacked me like starving wolves.

_Macbeth! Macbeth! Beware Macduff!_

Don't bombard me with this shit now.

_Macduff will be the death of you!_

I friggin' know that, stop reminding me that Yumi'll—

_It's her blood! Her blood! Macduff's blood, it's hers!_

Yumi…Yumi's blood…

I stifled a frustrated roar and vaulted up the first three stairs in one leap, beginning to clamber all the way up to the top. She was one of the girls we all knew and she still walked. For now. If I had any control of my dreams I would make it so she would be shining white light instead of dripping death. I wanted to show her…that things still could turn to gold…

_You left Macduff. You've chosen ignorance. Your world will end. Macbeth, Macbeth…_

I don't care if Yumi would make my world end as long as she would continue hers.

_Ended in new life, Macbeth will have no slack. A short time to ponder, but no turning back._

Ended in new life…Oh my God.

Spring was considered a very happy season because it signified the new life coming into the world as both plants and animals. New life. Oh my God. This must be it.

I'm going to die. And there's no turning back. This is my time to ponder.

The stairs came by my feet in slower motion than before as I forced myself to give my mind time to think.

_You left Macduff._

_Open for attack!_

Holy hell. I knew that the time when Zombie Yumi said it that statement was way too much of a fragment—but was that really what she meant?

Did I willingly leave Yumi out for an attack in the wide open?

Yes I did.

Yes I did.

The top of the stairs became visible, and my heart skipped beats. I stopped quietly just before I reached the door and somehow managed to slip the sword out from under my clothes. I listened hard, and heard the tune come to me at last.

Led Zeppelin.

I gripped the hilt in my hand. All are one and one is all. It was time to rock and roll.

_No escapes for Macbeth, save the dagger that may float in front of your eyes. Is it there? Can you grasp it, Macbeth? Tell me, what will you do before this world ends…?_

I'm going to give life to the hopeless in exchange for my own.

I silently unsheathed the sword, watching the blade glimmer. Lukas's whistle came to a close end with the line "_And she's buying a stairway to heaven_" and I inhaled a breath, dropping the sheath carefully on the floor.

Showtime.

* * *

There you have it.

Next chapter.

It all comes down to this.

(I sound like a TV show series finale announcer, huh?)


	23. Final Showdown

_She lives in you_

_She lives in me_

_She watches over everything we see..._

lol. Oh, by the way, the little chapter statement in italics? Yeah. That. ...Gackt, anyone? 8D

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Three: Final Showdown

_Redemption_

An eerie grin spread over Lukas's face as he stood there, looking over the edge of the factory. He turned to the two girls, speaking a simple phrase.

"He's late,"

Yumi stiffened, her grip on Nevaeh's shoulders tightening instantly. Lukas continued to smile as his hand fished around in his trench pocket, pulling out an all-too-familiar weapon. Chocolate essence within Yumi's eyes froze, realizations of death flying all too fast into her heart with poisoned tips. Her hands carefully moved from Nevaeh's shoulders to her head, gently covering her eyes as Lukas loaded the gun and pointed it at her head.

"Such a shame to lose a neck like that…," he commented.

Yumi closed her eyes, saying one final thing to the little girl.

"Don't peek, Nevaeh…,"

The click of the revolver echoed in the winds and Yumi flinched. A nanosecond of silence stretched out longer than possible before I made my move. The door that was only slightly ajar suddenly blasted with sound and force as I smashed my shoulder into it, sword held in front. Lukas was dead ahead of me after blasting into the scene sideways, and I took no hesitation in drawing into my energy reserve for a full out sprint toward my once-father. A rage-filled scream of raw, pure revenge took over the air before I could realize it was coming from my mouth.

The glittering blade shimmered in the bright light as I twirled it around a few times before I flew into my target. Shining silver became masked by a sudden rush of red. Lukas screamed—the sound unnatural and almost like an animal. I blinked, shocked. The sword had flown in an arc following my arm, landing in a place that countered the gun. In result a splash of blood spurted from Lukas's wrist, a consequence of the depth of the cut. His animalistic scream rang out again as he jerked his hand away, blood dripping everywhere from the force of the slice. The gun still remained in a firm grip in his hand, though it was trembling from the pain he went through to keep it that way. How deep was the cut? I didn't know—but it looked bad. Real bad. I might've hit bone with as hard as I brought the blade down in my rage. A gurgle got caught in my throat, realizing the drops of blood that stained my shirt, face, and the once-perfect dog tag and sword. After Lukas was done screaming, he glared at me with so much hatred it was hard to believe, his dark eyes piercing through like a lance. I stumbled one step back. If Yumi or Nevaeh said anything, I sure didn't hear it over the pounding of my own heart.

Lukas's dark gaze locked with mine, and I froze, lip quivering. His right hand probably throbbed with uselessness now after what I just did. The left hand of his flashed forward and I could barely dodge what would've been a well-aimed punch. Instead of hitting me he quickly changed it into a very tight grip, refusing to let me go. I gasped in surprise at the ferocity of the tight hold. His dark eyes bore into me, and we became caught in a mental battle of gazes. We quaked with the power it took to resist each other.

Out of peripheral vision came Lukas's bloodied hand, managing to keep the gun in place still, and knowing that all he had to do was pull the trigger I was petrified at what he was thinking of next. It didn't take a lot of strength to release a bullet.

Although he shook as he did it, he slowly aimed the gun at my stomach. I made no move, just finally broke that insane man's stare to keep track of the barrel. I sucked in a breath through my nose, closing my mouth just waiting for him to squeeze the switch.

He had a change of plans.

I watched in horror as he moved the gun ever so slightly from my stomach to somewhere directed right behind me. I flinched as Yumi gave a rather loud wince. Nevaeh gurgled as though she still couldn't see anything. Lukas lifted the gun higher.

Snarls that had been waiting years to be released exploded into a flame in my chest, working their way up so my throat rippled with the sound. With as much force as I could muster I jolted my shoulder backwards, caught him off-balance, and pushed him just centimeters closer to the edge of the roof. He didn't release his hold on me while he cried in protest and tried to get his hold and aim back while I quickly switched the sword from my right to my left hand. I lost my logic at this point, acting on pure instinct. I think the sword rose a little higher in menace while Lukas twisted my arm so cruelly I swear he tore a few muscles. I cried in pain, trying to twist away from him. He moved his ruined hand closer to me, determined to finish me off first.

Then it happened. I don't know how. I don't know why. I just acted. I roared in frustration, tired of being pushed around by this mere man. The sword rose higher, then came down, down, down.

Lukas screamed once.

Blinded, the sword came up again. And what goes up must come down, of course.

Lukas screamed twice.

Not even realizing we were so close to the edge, the sword came down again; hitting the same wrist it had been targeted at from the beginning. I knew the blade was sharp, but really…I never thought that it could go this far.

The sword came down in the right spot, and Lukas's hand hit the rail. There was no air for the hand to go, only metal, so with the power I brought down with the blade, it hit square ground—at least, square enough to hold an amputation.

Lukas didn't scream.

He shrieked like a wounded bear in its final moments of torture.

Blood flew everywhere. It landed on Lukas's coat, his shirt, his tie, his face. It landed on my jacket, my shirt, my dog tag, my face. It was warm. And bittersweet.

And sick.

The right hand that was still clutching the gun toppled messily from the rail and fell away, plummeting and twisting down to the ground so far below, leaving a falling trail of blood in the air. In a sadistic way, the gun was taken care of. But all that blood…there was so much. So much! And Lukas screaming in the background didn't help either. I hate the man, but I never meant to amputate his hand!

I stumbled back. His blood was all over me, dripping off the sword making what once was silver into a crimson dye of desire. The pewter dog tag was ribbons of polished metal and cooling red. More blood sprayed onto the factory roof, creating some sort of art piece that would've impressed Jackson Pollock as Lukas danced around, frantically trying to sort out his pain and senses. I stepped back a few more paces, stopping still in front of Yumi and Nevaeh, not taking my eyes off of him. It took me a minute to realize it, but I was trembling so hard that the sword shook back and forth, my fingers kept twitching, and my lips quivered so hard my teeth clacked lightly. I was afraid of what I had done and what I could do. But there was a part of me that didn't care. Didn't mind. There was a part of me that cackled in delight. _You deserved that one. _That half said to Lukas. I couldn't help but agree. He deserved that one. Those thoughts just made me tremble more until finally, finally, I could hear her voice again.

"Reese…," Yumi whispered, emotion in her voice but altogether unidentifiable, "Reese, you came…You came for us…,"

I gulped down dry saliva and looked back at them, showing my scarred cheek. I looked into Yumi's scared yet strangely comforting chocolate eyes, lost in their renewed warmth. Her fingers spider-webbed over Nevaeh's face, and one of the little girl's lime green eyes peeked out from in between them at me. She softly whispered a 'Brugger…,' before I answered Yumi.

"How…How could I leave you…?" I whispered back, chokes and cracks in my voice. It wasn't just from the blood either. It was mostly from how close they came to losing their life in front of my very eyes. "How could I live…knowing that I'd left you…?"

I meant it. And from the look on Yumi's shocked face, she knew I meant it too. Maybe it was my imagination, but a soft pink spread over her cheeks, and Yumi blinked multiple times, one of her hands twitching as if she wanted to pull a crimson lock behind her hair. She resisted, but I saw and recognized the familiar look in her eyes.

Lukas grunted, and immediately my attention snapped back to him as he stood up, his bloody stump crudely wrapped up in his tie and shreds of his trench. Hatred didn't gleam in his eyes anymore. What was in his eyes was too soulless, too insane, too inhuman to be just hatred. He wanted me. And he wanted me more than dead.

Out from his left pocket flashed his switchblade, out and glimmering in the sunlight just like my sword was doing only a minute ago. A strong grimace spread on his face, and he looked more than ready to kill.

I shoved my less bloody hand behind me, pushing Yumi and my sister back just a little bit farther. They obliged quietly and backed off. Lukas took a maniac step forward, wobbling as though he were drunk (though I assumed he actually wasn't for once.)

"Run, Yumi," I said lowly to her, "Take Nevaeh and _run_. No questions. Get out. This has nothing to do with you,"

Yumi, though she must've been through a harrowing experience, was getting a grasp of this new freedom.

"I have questions, Reese, and if you don't survive to answer them…," she sucked in a breath, "I'll never forgive you,"

I couldn't help but give a weak smirk.

"Brugger…," Nevaeh said again, I took a quick moment and looked down at her.

"I'm here, Nevaeh," I said softly, "I'm here to protect you. I always will be,"

The wind gently caressed my face, as if applauding that statement and urging me to look forward. I shook my head of the metaphor, and turned to Lukas. He was very near.

"Get back!" I shouted, raising the dripping sword in defense. Lukas staggered forward, and I kept the blade separating us, steadily stepping back.

"You're raving mad," I observed, "You're nothing but raving mad…," Lukas snarled at me.

"You…You…bitch…Jap…bitch…you…," he spat, unchained, "You'll…You'll pay for that…bitch…pay for this!!"

"_Run!_" I shouted, ducking a fatal knife slash. Yumi took the message and fled near some metal boxes on the roof, taking poor shelter behind them, watching the scenes from there and making sure Nevaeh saw nothing of it. Lukas slashed again, nearing my arm but just barely missing the artery. Some of my blood was thrown into the game as he slashed the muscle of my upper arm. I winced, but didn't fall back. He was acting like some sort of deranged zombie with a knife—a marionette for all to watch.

A puppet show.

A Shakespearian puppet show.

I thrust the sword forward, hopeful to agitate him enough to back up enough for me to get more distance between us and Yumi and Nevaeh. He stopped, staring at me. The little humanity that remained in his eyes was no more. There was only beast.

No. That's too complimentary for him. He was nothing more than a frenzied…thing. And nothing more.

But as I soon found out, he was a _clever_ frenzied thing.

"So, are you?" he asked me. Confused, I didn't know how to reply and just stood there, looking a little taken aback. I wanted to ask, but I didn't want to make conversation with him. As an additive, I didn't want to be sucked into another psych-out preformed by him. There was no way I was going to be fooled this time.

"Are you going to kill your other family member?" he continued. Something in my chest got struck by lightning, but I forced myself to ignore it. _Be strong. Get through this. Come on. You can do it…_

"Come on. You can do it," Oh hell, please don't go mind-reader on me, Lukas! "You've done it before. I'm sure you remember, don't you? Tell me, did she scream? Did she squirm? How did you manage it? How did she die? Tell me, how did she die?"

"Reese…," Yumi sputtered, "What the hell is he talking about?"

Oh no. No, no, no, no, don't listen to this Yumi—don't believe this please!

"It wasn't my fault," I stated, though my voice was noticeably weakening. Lukas definitely took note of it, and his grin returned as he continued, his improvised bandage skuzzy and dripping.

"Oh, of _course_ it wasn't. Nobody…ever means for these things to happen—but sometimes our anger just gets in the way…wouldn't you agree," Lukas dropped his voice so only I could hear, "…Ulrich Stern?"

I faltered so much I nearly dropped the sword. Lukas twirled the knife around in his fingers, still grinning.

"Because wasn't it you who was broadcasted nationally about the murder of his own mother? Weren't the only DNA samples found adequate at the crime scene yours?" He approached me, glee crossing his face as he watched me quiver. Each step was an echo to me, and I suddenly forgot who I was and why I was here. His smile was very close to mine when he spoke again.

"Cold-blooded murderer. Taking Meria's life like that. Your own mother…why did you do it?"

Frog-like blubs came out of my mouth, stating clearly that I was unable to answer. Lukas stood there staring at me for a minute before his eyes traveled down to my bloodstained shirt. He noticed something I hadn't earlier, and his grin turned to a sneer.

"You even had her lie to me about this necklace. You know where I've seen one of these before? _On the Jap!_" His only hand snatched the now-exposed necklace and pulled back. I gurgled in surprise and sudden desperation.

The yin-yang shard.

Yumi's shard.

_My_ shard.

"Don't!" I begged, "Oh God no don't please!" I tried to tug away from him by struggling to back up a few steps, but he held his dirty hand firm on the shard, pulling on the leather cord. That cord wouldn't last for long, I knew this. Lukas relished in my pleas as I continued to weakly pry his hand away.

"_Please!_" I cried, trying to slip it away from his grasp. As if he was basking in the wake of my cries, Lukas gave two sadistic pulls on the cord.

From the back of my neck I felt the cord snap.

_I know it's Chinese, but…_

Time flew in slow motion. I saw the two leather strands billowing in the saddened wind, connecting in the fist of the cruelest man on earth. Falling backwards, I screamed in agony as I watched the shard disconnect from me. I wasn't supporting my weight, so it was no surprise when the metal roof made a resounding smack when my spine hit it.

_This is my farewell to you._

Yumi…

_Good-Bye…Ulrich._

Yumi!

The sword fell from my hands as I lay there, tears sprouting in my eyes. _Don't leave me!_

The shape of Lukas shadowed me, and I winced as he dangled the shard in front of my face as if I was a kitten he was depriving of a catnip toy. Fighting the urge to reach out for it was harder than expected. I knew that it would prove to be fruitless, but still. I needed that necklace. I needed it so much…

It was a touch of my benevolent past.

"You could've been great," Lukas seethed, "Instead you degraded to the level of manure," I sniffed. Somewhere in me my blood boiled from the way he put the Orientals, but it was miles away. Defeat was so much closer now—especially as I realized something scarily crucial.

There was no alcohol on his breath. Not one drop.

"Oh my God…," Yumi exclaimed from behind me. Wincing and flinching, I realized that she must've seen what he was tormenting me with; a black yin-yang necklace, the exact opposite of hers. I didn't know what she made of that as far as identity, but it must've been haunting to see such a thing as that. Lukas's head snapped up to stare at her, and some of my senses returned.

_Yumi_.

I let my hands flow the way they needed to, grabbing Lukas's legs and clawing at them to make him as immobile as possible. The crazed man shook his leg roughly, but I would not let go. I heard Yumi make some noises as if she was ushering Nevaeh away to a safer spot while she herself stayed put before the world spun.

If this was a Looney Tunes production, there would be a clear shoeprint embossed onto my forehead. If this was a take-off of Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon I would've slid fifteen feet. If this was some sort of Marvel Heroes showdown I'd be unaffected by the mere kick. In the real world it snapped my head back, cracked my neck, and made me fall limp to the metal, colors that weren't supposed to be present prancing about like they owned the place. There was sufficient pain in my head that transferred to the rest of my body while I lay there, slightly helpless.

"You're just as stubborn as your mother was before you killed her," Lukas stated, staring down at me, "Stubborn as an ass,"

My mother wasn't really the stubborn one in the family. Of course she had some of it, we all do, but I'm quite sure that I inherited it from none other than Lukas himself.

The yin-yang shard was dropped next to my face and I slapped my hand down on it without thinking. Right after that was accomplished Lukas's sharp shoe came down on my hand as if he was going to crush the shard underneath. I grunted and whined as he twisted and pressed down, crunching my hand all the way to the floor. When he released it was throbbing so much I'd thought it swell up to the size of a grapefruit. But the shard was safe—my touch of past wasn't harmed too much. I cried my last few tears before Lukas grabbed me by the collar. He held the glittering switchblade to my face, pressing the point of it into my jaw.

"I gave the decision to you one to many times. You can't save either of them now. They're mine,"

Lukas moved the knife to the bridge of my nose and slashed downward in one quick, smooth movement. My face reopened with an arc of blood as I turned my head to the side and screamed in pain. One slash of the scar had reopened, its path lengthening to where Lukas had pointed the knife to. I wanted to break down and sob. Out of everything I possessed, I never thought that he could take this scar away from me—this scar, the only one I wanted to relive, the only one with a perfect memory with it. I never thought that he was able to take it away, but here…he just did.

"I never understood your scar," Lukas said as if he was starting a casual chat. I gave a wounded feline moan as the cool, sharp tip of the knife found the crossing slash at the near corner of my mouth, "Out of all the other scars you have, I know nothing of this one. Tell me, boy, how did you acquire such a strange thing?"

As he talked he reopened the other side of the X, and I screamed again, never turning my head nor opening my eyes. Falling into the fleeting pain both physically and mentally, the last shred of dignity I had bled away with my wound. Gone. Everything I owned now belonged to Lukas.

And it was soon to be true that everything I cherished belonged to him as well.

"Go to hell…," I gurgled softly, not even caring anymore. Lukas snarled and dropped me, the back of my head whip-lashing on the metal roofing. I rolled away from him and everyone else, closing my fist tightly around the necklace and holding it close to me, letting my other hand cover up my now bleeding cheek in remorse. Blood dribbled down my face, following down the curves of my lips and damming up against my nose.

Damn it all. Damn it all to hell.

I felt myself begin to cry.

_I can't even save my own mother let alone my sister and love_.

Nevaeh made a move that Yumi found very bad, seeing as she shouted her name and screamed out a 'no.' Yumi stopped her from going an inch further just as Lukas began to advance on them. I curled up into a ball and wept. Nevaeh cried my name, but I didn't try to hear her.

I was already gone.

Yumi gurgled and stepped back a few paces. If this was normality she could've easily defended herself and Nevaeh, but I saw what she looked like. She was pale and weak, and her eyes were red from either sickness or lack of sleep. With as raving insane as Lukas was and the differences in strengths, she wouldn't stand a chance. The poor Japanese girl knew it too.

But she still tried.

"Me!" She cried, pleading him, "Do it, kill me first! Go ahead, kill me first!"

_Kill me first,_ I chanted in my head, _I deserve to die._

The wind suddenly took up an angry gust against me, and I felt like I was taking a beating from its fists. How ironic. This all started with a beating, and it's going to end with one, isn't it?

_Get up_.

I don't want to. I can't. It would be worthless anyways.

_Get up!_

The wind pounded at me harder, and I winced. It was such a nice day outside, and it was all going to end right here…in new life.

_Ulrich Stern! Get up!_

Was that the wind chanting to me? Impossible. Wind doesn't do that. Your mind does—that is, if your mind is lost. I wouldn't be surprised if mine was.

Yumi screamed, and then shouted once more, "Kill me first!!"

Her voice echoed a memory in my head.

_So…what do you think of the stars?_

Mother…

_Is that what you think of the stars, then?_

Yumi screamed again, throwing herself straight at Lukas, who struggled to one-handedly push her away. She ordered Nevaeh to run and hide, and I could hear her little feet obeying her command. Yumi then repeated what she had been saying all along the entire time.

"Kill me first!!"

_Get. Up. Now._

The wind smacked my face, then brushed it lightly as if it was nothing but a mere kiss on the forehead.

_There was no reason to remember me. But you have made one. And now I must be remembered._

_GET UP._

Maybe I'm brainless. Insane. Cuckoo. Mad. Wrong in the head. The wind was whispering to me and I heard it as a long-lost voice in my ear. I don't care if I killed her or not. She was my mother. And as far as I'm concerned…she's alive.

Lukas kicked Yumi back. Nevaeh came out of her hiding place, being the toddler that she was. Yumi told her to run again but my sister, being related to me, refused. Tears of frustration burst in Yumi's eyes, before Lukas landed a blow to her head with the knife hilt. The Japanese girl stumbled backwards and landed on her butt. I realized then that she was as sick as I expected she was. But she still said the same thing.

"Please…just kill me first…," she murmured, her voice losing its power, "Please…," Yumi sobbed, waiting for the blow to strike. She'd never see her family again, would she?

But only if she followed Lukas's watch.

"It will change nothing," Lukas chided, "You all will die anyways," He stood over Yumi, and raised the knife. She shut her eyes and waited.

Lukas gagged, choked, then began to cough in a frenzy. Yumi's eyes shot up immediately, wide and shocked. But no one was as shocked as Lukas as I tightened the muscles up in my arm against the pulsation of his throat. He gagged again, and dropped the knife as he grabbed me, trying to weakly shake me off. I wouldn't hear of it.

"Never again," I seethed dangerously in his ear, "Never, _ever_, again,"

A shiver undulated up and down Lukas's spine and I couldn't help but smile. For once the tables were finally turned. He was now afraid of me.

I spun around, holding full control of Lukas as I let him go, putting me between him and the girls as it should be. Before he could catch his breath I swiveled around and landed a sharp turn-side kick square on his sternum, and he backed up a few paces and began to violently cough. My morale was raised as the wind gently swathed itself around me and I approached Lukas, stopping in line with the sword.

"Did you know you made a mistake, Lukas?" I asked him as casually as he had confronted me. I swept my foot out, caught the sword, and kicked it flailing upward, catching the hilt in midair and twirling it around to comfort myself with it once again, both the red and silver of the blade, "You had caught me off-guard for a while, I'll admit that. I didn't think—I never thought—that you could ever take my memories away from me. And yet…you did…,"

I lowered my tone to that of a vengeful villain, darkening my voice.

"I never imagined you could take my scar away from me, but you did," I stepped forward and kicked him in the stomach with a nice front kick. He fell backward onto his butt just as Yumi had done.

"You took away my last happy memory, Lukas. Now you have everything I own. Are you happy? You sure don't look that way to me,"

Lukas was indeed far from happy. Though his face was twisted into a fierce scowl, his wide, frightened eyes gave it all away. He thought for a moment, licked his dry lips, and replied.

"I know where you got it; it was when you killed Meria, wasn't it?"

To everyone's surprise including myself, I threw back my head and laughed, "That won't work on me, Lukas. Why? Because she isn't dead. Meria isn't dead,"

Lukas narrowed his eyes, "She _is_ dead, they buried her months ago," he retorted. I laughed again, and pointed the sword at him, becoming serious.

"Who's to say that was her? Who's to say that _wasn't_ her? Who's to say that the person buried under the name Ulrich Stern in the cemetery is _Ulrich Stern?!_" I challenged. Lukas's eyes shrank and he gulped.

"Meria's dead!"

"Alive!" I shouted, "Meria is alive! Everyone would agree, Meria's alive!"

Yumi's eyes bore into the back of my neck. If I didn't look blatantly insane I don't know what insane is. Then again, aren't I insane?

Not as insane as Lukas. He proved that himself right there and then. His voice cracked and screamed while he suddenly burst.

"She's _dead_, boy! She's dead! I know she's dead! I saw it myself! Her head banged on the countertop and started bleeding! I thought she was dead even _then!_ I saw it, boy! She's dead! I took her to the abandoned rotwielers near the back alleys! I saw her die! I heard her scream because she was still alive! _I saw her die, boy!_"

Not even the wind stirred. Everything was dead silent. I stared emotionlessly at Lukas. Lukas stared at me, panting. Yumi and Nevaeh were behind me, and Yumi was breathing high-pitched and fast. I took in a heavy sigh.

"You're right," I said, my tone normal. What he had just said racked my mind with horrible visions, but I pushed them away for reason's sake, "She is dead,"

Lukas's voice regained some of its normality when he spoke again, "She is. Game over,"

I nodded, "It is for you, Lukas. Because right now I've got something that you could never have that would be your downfall,"

"What…?" he said, growling disbelief in his voice.

A toothy smirk worked its way on my face, pushing my injured cheek up to meet my eye. I had won the battle of the wits. Gullible is written in the sky. Lukas had fallen in my trap. Because I have my back-up.

"Witnesses."

Realization dawned on Lukas's face as his eyes became pinheads, his focus suddenly behind me to the two people who had heard everything he had just confessed. The wind swooshed by, as if applauding me as Lukas began to struggle with whatever grip he had left.

Yumi was staggered behind me, and it was clear from the awkward steps and noises she made in response to Lukas's gruesome testimony that she could hardly believe her ears on what had just happened. I was playing insane the entire time, but of course nobody could know that until the work was done.

And it was finished with a gold star.

Lukas fought to his feet, and started to look for an exit. Before he could see one I was on him, hand at throat and sword delicately dancing on his Adam's apple.

"You can't hide from me, Lukas," I warned, "You're not going anywhere,"

Lukas blubbered over words and sounds, trying to find something—anything—to use against me. He came up with nothing for a long time before he took in a deep breath, released it, and finally agreed. I kept my angry eyes drilling into him the entire time.

"Yes. Alright. I'll go with you…," Keeping my hand and sword at his neck but loosening my grip, I allowed myself to listen.

Bad move.

"I'll go with you!" He screeched, swinging his skuzzy bandage straight into my eyes. I roared in pain and frustration, stepping back and wiping the blood and grit from my eyes. Yumi gave a sharp gasp.

"Reese!" she called just as I took a heavy blow to the side of my head. I gripped the sword tightly, not willing to let it go. My body stumbled to the side then dropped only a meter or so from the railing. Lukas began cackling like your clichéd villain and kicked at my ribs. I sputtered and dropped my wiping hand from my eyes, blinking until I could see clearly. Yumi screamed my alias again as Lukas landed another blow before he picked me up by my lapels.

"Of course I'll go with you! I'll go with you to Hell and back!!" He laughed again, nothing left in his eyes.

"Have a fun time in Hell, son!" he said, just before he was going to launch me over the edge.

He was infiltrated by a clean punch to his cheek delivered by none other than Yumi herself. She was panting, and there was a thick line of sweat on her forehead despite the nice weather. Fever.

"God, that felt good…," she remarked, massaging her knuckles. Lukas groaned and sat him. I nodded a quick thanks to her before striking the sword down at his face. Flicking my wrist I led the sword in such a way that it made a graceful arc, amplified only by the line of blood following it. Yumi fell back as I raised the sword again to bring it down on the same cheek, letting the tip of the blade rip as deep as it wanted.

"You're finished, Lukas," I growled, watching as he sat up and let the blood drip from the X scar on his cheek to his chin. It was a perfect mimic of the way mine used to be before he reopened it. "You're done for," I repeated.

He stared at me once again with that sort of feeling that bypasses hatred with a couple of light years.

"To Hell and back," he muttered darkly. Before I could open my mouth his shoe smacked into my knee and I screamed, feeling an awful screech of ligaments as they were unexpectedly twisted the wrong way. Yumi screamed again as Lukas stood up, but before anyone gave her the chance to run forward again I threw the sword back at her, flicking her a glance that clearly said '_stay there_.' She started and froze. While I was turned away Lukas made his move.

Snatching me, he used all of his strength and flung me at the railing. Cries of terror flew out of my mouth and I grabbed the railing without much thought, hanging onto it for dear life. A glimpse of the below ground struck me, and dizziness won a revolution in my brain, causing me to choke. I tried to back up farther into the middle of the roof but Lukas was right behind me, trying to shove me over anyways. Crying in dismay, I instantly spun around and in self defense nabbed him and threw him toward the railing like he had done to me, instinct pumping through my blood the entire time.

Lukas caught the rail, but his handless stump had jammed itself against it and he screamed in agony, losing his balance. Most of his body weight was directed over the railing from catching himself, so where did he fall?

Up and over.

Not expecting such a thing to happen, I rushed forward and peeked over the rail where he just disappeared. Yumi gave a short gasp, and tentatively approached, keeping her distance.

One handedly Lukas clung to the vertical pole of the railing, foam forming at the corners of his mouth. I let out breaths of exhaustion, staring at him, then turning my body full away—too sickened and dizzy to look down any longer. I tried to regain my breath before I turned around again, because then it would be to help him somehow clamber back up. Crazy? Maybe. But I was _not_ going to be a murderer, fake or not—in self defense or not.

I took in two deep breaths, caught Yumi and Nevaeh in the corner of my eye, and prepared myself to turn around again.

"Reese, look out!" Yumi shrieked. I had one second to process what she said before Lukas's hand took vicious hold of my ankle. I yelped in surprise, twisting my body around to see his elbow wrapped around another vertical pole while his hand clenched at my ankle like a vicious crab. Using my body as leverage, he began to systematically climb his way up until his chin was just beneath my shoulder. I didn't dare to move during the entire time, afraid of sending us both over the edge. He threw his amputated arm across my neck, tightening his muscles just as I had done. I choked, noticing that I was being pulled down by him. With his weight and mine and the way he held onto me, I was slipping drastically fast. My mind raced, realizing that if I could just slide out of my jacket I could rid myself of him easily enough—his real strength was not in his injured arm. His weight tugged on me again, telling me one thing: I was running out of time. I had only one small window to use for freedom.

Yumi was struggling not to run up and help me. She understood the physics of the situation and how delicate a light push could be. My window of freedom was coming, I was just slipping out of my dark gray jacket when something else popped up—someone who did not understand the physics of the situation came sprinting from the side, tears scrolling down her reddened cheeks. Yumi couldn't stop her in time.

Nevaeh bowled into my legs screaming my name and I faltered, falling down just a bit farther and faster. Panic and emotional pain struck my heart as I realized one thing.

I had missed my window.

I was going to fall.

And if I didn't do something soon, my baby sister was going to fall with me. Tears stung my eyes, knowing there was only way I could save my sister. The unbearable hot water burst from my eyes as I shouted one thing I should've said from the moment I met her.

"I love you, Nevaeh!"

Heaving in a sob, I kicked her sharply, causing her to travel three meters from where I stood. Yumi called out and started to run to Nevaeh, but changed course as she saw me fall back. Thank God, Nevaeh sat up and stared at me, sobbing. I didn't hurt her too bad.

The wind kissed my bleeding cheek as Aelita burst through the door, panicking. Her gray marine eyes saw me and exploded with fear. All three girls watched as the scene folded out in front of them in slow motion, helpless to do anything.

The ground slipped from my feet and Lukas roared something about Hell again. My eyes became dazed as I watched as the three girls disappeared from view to be replaced with clouds. Feeling a sudden heave of anger, I twisted around and faced my maniacal parent. I grabbed one of his lapels, and screamed the very same war cry I had called the night Nevaeh was kidnapped.

"_MERIAAAAAAA!!_"

Fear crossed Lukas's eyes one more time. I relished in it, basked in it, immersed myself in that triumph, hearing another voice mixed with mine. A Japanese voice mixed with mine.

"_REESE!!_"

Slam.

Unbearable, luscious pain flooded the arm that held Lukas as we landed. There were quite a few main resounding cracks; one came from my arm, another from my already injured knee, and one more coming from either Lukas's skull or his neck.

His eyes were still open.

I bit down hard on my tongue as we landed, maybe ripping a piece of the tip off or something. My ribs screamed with my sternum when we hit the ground. The front of my head banged with Lukas's as he died, and weight was dependant on my broken arm.

Pain. Black. Dizzy.

Blood poured out of my mouth like a fountain from my lungs, and I fell to the side of the corpse onto steep ground.

The next thing I knew I was frozen all over from the spring melt of the river, and I was sinking down, down, down into the clutches of the creature death itself. Blood and water choked me at the same time, and I didn't fight the urge to fall asleep.

_Yumi wasn't the death of me. Yumi was never Macduff._

_Nevaeh was._

Fade to nothing.

* * *

Burrn, bitches.

To all those that do not believe that I just killed off Reese by throwing him off the roof because the story is in his POV...well, guess what? Next chapter isn't in his POV!! Mwahahahaha!

Suckers. :U


	24. The Art of Loneliness

I have been a mean author and delayed postage of this from this morning at exactly 10:19 am to 3:14 pm. Not because of inability to post, mind you. Because I DIDN'T WANT TO.

This chapter still isn't going to be posted on DevART. For a while at least. Let's see if they find out!

...I enjoy tossing people off of abandoned factory roofs.

Really.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Four: The Art of Loneliness

_Because they're really gone…_

_Panic like never before flung itself into Yumi's heart, riding it like a flaming chariot down to her stomach and then to her head. She was bent over the railing, her hand outstretched to the boy who had just tumbled overboard even though she knew that she couldn't do anything to help him stay up. His name blasted out of her lips, screamed for the longest time she could muster._

_Then he hit bottom._

_Even from way up on the roof of the factory Yumi could hear the sickening cracks the bones made when they split and broke from the force of the fall. Why did physics have to be working today of all days?_

_Yumi watched, horrified as her pink-haired friend Aelita came up to the railing next to her to see Reese, the boy, slide off of his father's body down the concrete bank into the river, leaving a nice large blood smear behind. Yumi gave a short shriek and turned around, instantly discarding her denim jacket._

"_Aelita, please, take Nevaeh downstairs to the main floor—get Jeremy and Odd up here, hurry!"_

_Aelita was about to question her actions, but the door down to the factory had already slammed shut by the time she had opened her mouth._

_Taking the stairs five at a time, Yumi literally flew down to the main floor, the adrenaline pump putting her fever and sickness aside. Thousands of needles stabbed at her heart as she used her long legs to an advantage. Reese. Reese. Reese. What was it about that boy? He was a cruel bastard to her most of the time—except for when she was physically hurt or helpless. Even yet, when Reese was harassing her, as soon as he laid a hand of harm on her, he'd falter, stumble, then curse and punish himself for his action. Yumi should've hated him. She kept telling herself that she did! But as the school year wore on, with the appearance of his little sister and his father, Yumi had realized that there was _far_ more to this Reese than met the eye. That, actually, could be said about anybody, but the way that Reese was placed in that statement made it extra interesting._

_So he had grown on Yumi, whether she liked it or not._

_Come to think of it, it was also a matter of whether _he_ liked it or not too._

_Her footsteps echoed through the deserted factory, the metal tones flying past her brain as she had one goal in mind._

_The river._

_Yumi leaped to the side of the bridge onto the narrow, steep shore. She slipped and nearly toppled in, but she caught herself before she lost her complete balance, throwing her shoes and socks off with unknown speed before taking a deep breath and standing up._

_There was a ribbon of blood in the water, and if Yumi peered hard enough she could see the direct source. She shut her eyes in disbelief before she plunged into the river with a messy dive._

_The ice-cold water slid over her, freezing her in its bodysuit quality. She wanted to stop and tread for a moment to warm up her muscles, but she—no, Reese didn't have a moment. Besides, it would help her fever anyways—she hoped. Without pushing up for a breath of air, she sliced and pulled the water behind her, keeping her eyes open as best as she could underwater. Yumi knew this wasn't the cleanest river in the country, but goggles were a luxury she couldn't afford at the moment._

_A foreign shape floated dully in the water, half-sunken but hovering just above the riverbed. Yumi fought her urge to scream out underwater, and gave three great kicks upwards. She broke surface, gasped and inhaled deeply with her stomach, then seal-dove back into the water. Using her long legs Yumi kicked as hard as she could until she reached him._

_Red clouds swerved and drifted around his mouth, twisting with the current to create an eerie spell with the dark water. Yumi fought the urge to gulp the air encased in her mouth, and let the current help her attain the limp boy's body. When she reached him she immediately shoved her arms under his armpits, and scraped the sandy bed. Touching firmly as fast as she could, Yumi gave a mighty kick on the ground, sending her and Reese shooting upwards. They reached halfway to the surface before the current picked them up again and they started to sink down once more. Defiant, Yumi wrinkled her tired face and kicked as hard as she could, frantically trying to recall lifeguard lessons in gym class. Catching a notable point of importance, Yumi switched from flutter-kick to breaststroke kicking, furiously striving to make headway. Hair flopped into her face without Yumi's notice as she pushed herself harder and harder. Lights and darks were starting to intensify and blur when finally she broke surface._

_Though she had jumped into the water to the right side of the bridge from the factory, she now found herself on the other side to no surprise. Yumi gulped in reviving air and rearranged one of her arms, putting it on Reese's cheek and chin, making sure his face stayed above water._

_Even if it didn't mean anything anymore._

_Blood mixed with water flowed out of the corner of his mouth as well as his cheek, making Yumi have to try her best not to be realistically squeamish at this time. Coughing and forcing herself to breathe, Yumi forced her weak limbs to move with power. Hair was plastered to a half of her face, blotting out one eye. Yumi dealt with it, not willing to risk losing Reese to a vision problem. The river was swelling with the spring melt, making the current just that much harder to fight. In the midst of her swimming a familiar face rushed out onto the bridge, spotted her, and leaped onto shore._

"_Odd!" She called as best she could, "Odd!!"_

_Odd's eyes were wide with understandable fear as he crouched down on shoreline, shouting his encouragement. Yumi had known Odd long enough to tell that he desperately wanted to help, but with his fractured leg and 'fashionable' boot (as he put it) were too much of a drag to swim with._

"_Come on, Yumi, you're almost here! You're doing great, just a little farther!"_

_Yumi panted, winces from the cramps working their way into her voice. She gave an extra lift to Reese to make sure he was still above water, and kicked frantically, losing her pattern and quality. Odd clapped nervously and hurried her along, following as the current brought her more to the side. Yumi squeezed her eyes shut._

_The side pains from the cramps were eating at her lungs, ravaging at her breathing ability. She growled, gulped in a breath that was half water, and cursed inwardly. She felt her body sink just a littler lower, giving the knowledge that Reese too had sunk with her. Frustration tangled her insides and brain, and she felt like screaming._

_Then her hand hit the rough concrete of the man-made shoreline._

"Awesome,_ Yumi!" Odd cheered, "Hold onto the bank, that's it—I'll get Reese for you!"_

_The Japanese girl gratefully gripped the bank like it was the rest of her good future laid out for her, and plowed Reese's body through the water so he barely rested on the concrete. Odd was still congratulating her to take his mind off of the situation as he took hold of Reese's arms and hauled upward. With a strained 'oomph' and a complaint at how heavy he was, Odd stumbled and spiraled backwards as he pulled the boy out of the water. Yumi watched tiredly in concern as the unconscious boy triumphed over Odd by twisting up and eventually laying on top of him as if they were merely playing the childhood game of Monkey-Pile. If normality was in play, Odd would've groaned, perhaps giving a comment about help to get the heavy load off of him. But Odd was silent—scared stiff of the events that he no doubt witnessed via video surveillance. Yumi felt empathy for him as she uneasily crawled out of the freezing water, the lanky boy worming out from under Reese, causing Reese to be face down in the grass._

_Yumi, even though her limbs felt disconnected and far too weak, remedied this taboo position immediately, helping Odd to flip him over on his back. As Yumi saw the blood that was still present on his face, her esophagus clogged up and her eyes stung. She shook her head violently to rid herself of the sensation, and crawled over to Reese's chest._

"_Odd," Yumi said hoarsely, "Odd, I know this sounds strange but please, check up on the man on the other side—I think he's…I think he's…,"_

_Odd recognized the tone in Yumi's voice immediately and nodded, clomping off with no questions. She needed her time alone._

_Yumi's mind was disconnected and frantic. She could perform CPR on him, but with the blood that was no doubt coming from his lungs, what would that do? Mouth-to-mouth wouldn't really help either, well, maybe, but with as far as Reese was gone._

Reese was _not_ gone._ Yumi ordered herself hysterically._

Reese is _not_ gone!

_Her mind scrambled and useless, she was practically helpless on what to do. Nothing? God no! She could never live with herself! But the blood—his punctured lungs! He wouldn't last long—even if she did save him, he was going to…going to…die._

_Like the other boy did._

_Yumi felt herself begin to cry. It had happened. Whether her mind wanted her to or not, Yumi's heart had fallen in love with Reese Anders. Despite what she knew about his condition, she crouched over him, her hands placed delicately but firmly on his chest as she belted her emotions out at him._

"_Reese Anders, don't you _dare_ die on me!! I have so many questions, so many answers that I want! I know you're different, I just don't know how!! Don't die on me, Reese! I…I don't want you to die! Not again! Don't do this to me! Don't let him die…again…!"_

_She was bawling to the point of breathlessness. Reese didn't open his eyes. Didn't even twitch. If medical help wasn't there within two minutes, Reese was going to die._

_Even if she called right now, the ambulance wouldn't be here in time. Her heart was already shriveling and pickling itself, knowing that his life was lost._

_Odd stood over her on the bridge, his face numb, grim, and his eyes cloudy. The man, Lukas, Reese's father, he was dead. That alone made Odd just a little squeamish, but the fact that this one boy who had needlessly saved all of their lives for no cost but his own grief was now laying utterly broken there on the narrow bank strip, that had really stabbed Odd in the gut. For the first time in his life, Odd felt like he wouldn't eat for the rest of the month. The knife twisted itself and pulverized his stomach as his Japanese friend began to scream uselessly at the unconscious—or deceased—boy._

_He's just a boy. Odd thought to himself._

_Just a boy…like me._

_He felt sick. Vomiting was imminent. As Jeremy approached the bridge leaving Aelita and Nevaeh in the main room, Odd turned to the river and pulled his head over, ready to let loose._

_When not-too-distant sirens sounded, getting closer by the second. Odd choked back his bile and puke, and glanced up._

_There stood a red-haired girl dressed in punk attire, holding a simple cell phone in her hand as she looked passed him to the soon-to-be corpse. A lone braid bordered the left side of her face as she stood frozen there, the call she made not even ended. In a thin, awestruck voice she whispered one thing to him and Jeremy as a white vehicle pulled up behind her._

"_I called the paramedics…as soon as I saw…I never thought that he…,"_

_Who was she?_

_Odd stared at her as a bunch of EMT men jumped from the ambulance and followed Jeremy's staggered pointing finger to where Yumi was glancing up at them, tears reddening her eyes. They made no hesitation to approach the situation while Odd straightened up, forcing himself not to barf. Jeremy came up behind him, the same question that was in Odd's mind suddenly out in the open as his intelligent friend spoke it out loud without hindrance._

"_Who are you?"_

_The girl took a few moments to respond as she quickly gathered her mental composure and finally closed the cell phone. She took in a few deep breaths before finally answering them._

"_I…My name is Tara. He—er, Reese, he used to go to my school. We kind of were, kind of weren't friends. I…didn't know much about him,"_

_Suspicion barely creeping through in Jeremy's I'm-slowly-losing-my-mind-and-stance voice, he retaliated her as the EMTs gravely but systematically put the dying boy on a stretcher, shouting desperate orders to each other while Yumi stood against the factory wall, distressed._

"_How did you know he was here?"_

_A small smirk flashed on Tara's face, as if she knew she could tactically turn the question right back at Jeremy as an answer, but the situation did not call for smart-mouthed wits. They had all seen what had happened. They knew how dire the mood was._

"_He nearly crashed into me while apparently racing somewhere…He apparently didn't recognize me, but the tone in his voice and the way that he fled through the streets told me something was up…I had to follow,"_

_Jeremy stood frozen for a while, but then cracked and slowly nodded, his lips trembling. A Xana attack? Oh, they all could handle that. Anything out of the norm was easily dealt with, Odd knew._

_But the cruelty of man? That was something completely different. Everyone knew what the cruelty of man really was. Witnessing it firsthand was a little…disastrous and harrowing to go through. This was another game entirely, and only one person knew the rules._

_And now that person could very well be dead._

_A spasm shook Odd, and he stopped himself by hugging his arms._

_Reese. Dead._

_Ulrich. Dead._

_All of his roommates._

_Dead…_

**.let there be death for the alive and life for the dead.**

_Yumi sobbed. She couldn't help herself. Why she sobbed so hysterically there, up against the unfeeling wall of the factory, she did not know. He was just a boy; a remarkable boy, to be sure, but nothing but a mere boy. Younger than her, even. She hated to watch as the EMTs lifted his limp body up onto the stretcher, but she could not tear her eyes away from the horror that he had become, his shirt and face soaked thoroughly crimson as if he had gone bobbing for apples in a vat of his own blood. When they eased him onto the bed she gagged as his left arm swung about, an extra joint forced into his forearm. It was nearly a compound fracture, where the bone would've surfaced his skin, saying 'UP PERESCOPE' along the way._

_Black humor._

_Yumi's brain was entertaining her with dry, black humor. She moaned, shuddered, and followed the EMTs until she was on the bridge again, shivering and broken. Odd, Jeremy, and the redhead girl named Tara got out of the way in respectful silence as the men quickly rushed Reese into the back of the ambulance. Before any of them could comprehend it, the metal doors of the back of the ambulance slammed shut with a metallic clang, and the woman driver sped off, the sirens going rampant and the bubble lights on top flashing red bolts of alarm, leaving a lone EMT on shore with the deceased Lukas. Though normally he might've been a bit crushed to know that he was left behind, he understood that an emergency was an emergency, and the wounded had to be taken care of first._

_No sooner had the ambulance sped out of sight than the police cars arrived. Like great metal badgers, three cars filed in and blocked off the bridge with their monochromatic bodies. Solemn policeman stepped out from the cars as Aelita and Nevaeh finally emerged from the factory, wide-eyed and stricken. After a short while of confusion the policeman began to mechanically take their stock of the situation, accounting Lukas the madman as dead and listening to everyone's recount of the event. Nearly everybody—even Yumi—repeated multiple times that a lot more people would've been hurt if it weren't for Reese. That he was a hero. A martyr, even; because no one knew if he had survived yet or not._

_Nevaeh did not know the meaning of the word martyr—and she only asked Aelita once what it meant. Aelita shook her head and bit her lip, her eyes shining. She knew that if Nevaeh found out what the word meant, she wouldn't stop bawling. But that's when she started asking a different question over and over._

"_Where's brugger?"_

_Again._

"_I don't see brugger…,"_

_Once more._

"_Do you know where brugger is?"_

_Then, finally, with sorrow, "I want brugger…,"_

_Despite the patched group's effort to stall Nevaeh's knowledge in finding out that her brugger was…elsewhere…the little girl did not take as long as they'd hoped in figuring out what was going on. She knew that sirens meant bad things, and that there was a siren before the police showed up. Nevaeh didn't quite know the complete story of what was going on, but she had begun to guess that he was somewhere else because of the fall he took. Given from all of the scared, silent, and crying faces, she almost knew that it was, to say it simply, very bad._

_The policemen dressed in a deep navy that was almost ink black tried as best they could to appeal to her and try to talk her into telling them what she had seen, but she always shied away from them. Some of their faces were square and scary with stubble and cleft chins, but others looked kind and forgiving. Their badges were out in the open, but despite the lessons and teachings she had learned about the police she still avoided answering the questions. Aelita tried to gently coax her into it, and soon Nevaeh stopped burying her face into her sweater and crept away from the pink-haired girl. Shunned, Aelita gave up on the police questions and just tried to get Nevaeh back next to her._

_Nevaeh wouldn't listen. Something very wrong and happened and nobody was telling her what was going on. She wanted to know, but no one seemed to even hear her. As Aelita reached out her arms to the toddler, Nevaeh let out a pathetic little squeal, squirmed away from Aelita's grip and ran. The police shouted with Aelita after her, but using her small size to advantage she weaved in and out of their legs, ending up just beyond their hands. After breaking through, there was nothing but the stretch of bridge and the police cars parked on the sides._

_Needless to say, Nevaeh didn't know where she was going. Anywhere but there, she guessed. Back to Mrs. Periwinkle's? That love was contenting, but there was really only one person who could heal the empty pit that had become her tiny heart. She couldn't even remember the last time she got a pure hug from her brother._

_For unknown reasons her vision blurred up horribly, and her little legs that were running had started to trip and stumble. There was shouting behind her, noise, loudness. Loud sounded angry to Nevaeh unless it was laughter, and there was no joy behind her. She didn't want to turn around. If she paused to listen she could hear a few pairs of heavy footsteps behind her, wanting to catch her._

_There was only one man she associated heavy footsteps with._

_As two policemen barely got to her Nevaeh screamed and picked up her pace again, aiming straight for one of the cars. Right before she arrived at it the door opened and another man dressed in an ink suit stepped out. Nevaeh skidded to a stop and instantly changed directions, slipping. She didn't know where she was running now, as long as it was away from the footsteps._

_Surprised voices sounded an alarm in Nevaeh's head, as they were loud and close. Meaning that they were angry and they were going to get her. She panted and pushed herself harder. For a moment the way she ran almost brought exhilaration to her body as she felt as if she was flying she was sprinting so fast, like Superman even. But from the sounds, the men in pursuit were faster. Nevaeh was just about to give up when she ran smack into a denim leg._

_Knocked back onto her seat, Nevaeh shuddered as her blurred vision revealed dark pants. In her confusion she had run right into another patrolman! The mystery of her blurred eyesight was solved as the tears that were rolling down her cheeks intensified as the person with the long dark legs knelt down. Nevaeh flinched and tried to scoot away until two bright red stripes stood out against the haze. She stopped struggling to go away and stared at them, waiting for her eyes to focus even though they never did._

_Yumi returned the little girl's stare, somehow knowing what she wanted and knowing as well that they wouldn't be able to provide it. Nevaeh found herself frozen in front of Yumi save for her uncontrollable trembling. Yumi watched her steadily, calmly, not trying to hide the pain in her face. She wanted the toddler to know that they were on the same level of suffering and that they weren't that different from each other. Even if Yumi didn't want to admit it, she was feeling just as much pain and betrayal as Nevaeh was. The reason was clouded to her in her state of denial—not for the loss of Reese, but what the loss really meant for her._

_She felt the pain of not seeing a sibling for a long time. Yumi herself had not seen her little brother Hiroki in a week. Normally this would not slow her down, but after the kidnapping and the happenstances with her and Nevaeh in that awful storage room they 'stayed' in, Yumi missed Hiroki now more than ever. Not just him, but her entire family. Yumi choked and nearly started crying herself when she realized that Nevaeh's brother was the only family she really had left. This is why she was sobbing so badly. Reese was pretty much all she had to cling on to for real._

"_Hey there...," Yumi said, her voice quiet and choked._

"_I want brugger...!" Nevaeh sobbed, stinging Yumi's emotional tendons. She knew exactly how Nevaeh felt._

"_I'm...waiting for him too, Nevaeh," She said as Nevaeh allowed her to pull her close to her heart, "Wait with me,"_

_With time and loss of reluctance Nevaeh threw her hands around Yumi's waist while she continued to cry into her bosom. After letting the scene unfold, the policeman and Aelita left Nevaeh alone, the police trying to see if it would be possible to plan an interview with the toddler later—as a child's eyes are usually unclouded by emotion, opinion, and prejudice. That was their job—they didn't have to like it._

_Yumi wrapped her weak arms around the poorest girl there, and kissed the top of her head, letting her lips linger there. Her own tears trickled down to meet the roots of Nevaeh's hair, as they had down so many times before when they were together in the kidnapping._

_They both needed something they couldn't have._

**.we never realize what we have until it is lost to the eternity of nothing.**

_Reese was alive._

_Alive? Hardly, actually. It had been a long and grueling operation, and they had nearly lost him too many times to live on without having a heart attack or two down the road. Pumping the blood out of someone's lungs was never pleasant, but not only doing that and mending the lungs at the same time from the ribs that had punctured them! It wasn't the first operation of the like, but that didn't make it any more delicate and dangerous._

_Reese was alive though._

_But he was nothing more than a vegetable._

_People weren't allowed to visit him. Mrs. Periwinkle nearly exploded, the Vesuvius that she was, but even she was smart enough not to blow up in the doctors' faces. To them she waited patiently like an old lady should, but when they were gone she was doing her patented cussing and hopping about, angry that she was left with nothing to do. Everyone noticed it for what it was, though._

_Mrs. Periwinkle was worried sick._

_People could see it in the plain eye. She knitted things like crazy (Mrs. Periwinkle never knits!) The quality in her cooking had gone down considerably (the food was still heavenly, but it wasn't homey.) At times she'd be calling for Sarah or Reese only to stop mute-still when she realized they weren't there (Yumi had taken it upon herself to help Mrs. Periwinkle with the kids, therefore helping Nevaeh along the way.) Instead of warm, confident wisdom in her eyes there was now a bleak pain, a startling weakness (It emerged the very instant she heard about the instance with Reese at the top of the factory roof.)_

_And, as a result, Mrs. Periwinkle hardly smiled as much anymore._

_Yumi had the same reaction that she had when Ulrich had left two years ago, and when the news of his demise reached her ears. If someone said something that could just slightly tip her off, she burst into a fit of fiery rage in their faces. Some of her nights were spent sleepless, and some of those nights were because of her confused, frustrated tears, leaving her red-eyed in the morning. But most of all, she had gone the most silent she had ever had in years. If all was as it should be, her friends would've guessed a ferocious fight that her parents had. The Lyoko group knew, though, that this was not the case._

_Distance had grown far between Yumi and the real world because of it._

_Jeremy was sulking because Aelita was almost as sad as Yumi. He figured it was because she liked Reese and that Reese must've liked her too. Fights between the young couple sprung up like wildfire despite Aelita's attempts to patch up her relationship between her and Einstein. Nothing worked, therefore prolonging Aelita's sadness. Though Odd and Yumi saw plainly what was going on, Jeremy was deaf to their pleadings of truth._

_Jeremy was left with burning coals of resentment within him, tearing him and Aelita apart._

_His pink-haired girl was sadder than ever._

_Odd's leg was healing rather quickly now, and he was experimenting and doing more things with it (which is maybe the reason why he kept the boot on for longer than they originally told him) On the outside he pretended to his best ability to remain the unchanged one of the group, cracking the worst jokes thought of on the planet and eating like a gluttonous ogre. But the loss of another roommate had really cut him deeply. This time he didn't have a possession to remind him of this one. Ulrich had left his dog tag, but he gave that away, therefore erasing Ulrich's presence from the room. There were times that Odd would sit on his bunk, stroking Kiwi as he stared across the room at the childish drawing that was pasted on the otherwise blank wall. After a few week of doing this in his alone time, Odd saw something peeking out of the bottom of the pillow case._

_Should he?_

_No. Never._

_But curiosity killed the cat!_

"_And satisfaction brought the purple thug back," Odd whispered wickedly to Kiwi. Kiwi, being the dog that he was, looked at Odd, yawned, and scratched his ear with vigor. Unceremoniously, Odd pushed the dog off of his lap and nearly off the bed as he took one giant leap with his gangly legs to Reese's old cot. As he examined the glossy corner poking out of the pillow, he realized it was a photo. A shaking hand crawled forward, and he so wanted to see what it was. He was Odd, how could you blame him?_

_Just as he was pulling the photo out ever so carefully to barely see a brown-haired boy pushed up against a photo-booth wall by a…black-haired person a frantic knock pounded at his door, making him jump out of his skin. Odd hastily shoved the photo back into the pillowcase before he told the knocker that the door was unlocked. Aelita instantly opened the door and poked her head in, her expression hyper with urgency._

"_Odd! Odd, Odd!" She nearly screamed, but before Odd could ask what was going on Aelita blurted it out for him._

"_Reese, Odd, they're allowing visitors!"_

_Odd stood up from his fallen position immediately, pushing Aelita out into the hallway and closing the door behind him, following her as she and Jeremy power-walked down the hallway._

"_They are? Is he awake?" he asked in shock._

"_No, I don't think so. But we gotta go see him!" Aelita said breathlessly. It had been a week and a half since Reese had catapulted off of the factory, and no news of his immediate recovery was released until now—as this was an accepted way of telling the public that he was slowly but surely healing. Odd's heart began to pound. Was this it?_

_Jeremy said nothing. Aelita's excited voice coaxed him to continue doing so. When they got to the gatehouse there it was very dark, even for being just a spring evening. Once again pooling their money together after Yumi hastily arrived from helping Mrs. Periwinkle, they called a taxi and were soon found at the hospital doors. (Mrs. Periwinkle would arrive later after all the kids were sound asleep.)_

_When the nurse escorted the group into the room, it was nothing less than a shock._

_Nearly Reese's entire left arm was in such a huge cast it was probably more cement than flesh. An oxygen machine was hooked up to his nose like head-gear for those wearing braces. Each of his breaths brought a mechanical sound to it, giving a 'Hospital of Horrors' feel to it, as Odd said. The breaths even _looked_ mechanical, it was that bad. His cheek had a greatly thick square pad on it, putting pressure on his renewed scar. For once in his life his brow wasn't furrowed with his constant negative expressions, the eyebrows giving way to a normal, unconscious look. A lump underneath the thin sheets transformed his knee into some kind of watermelon. How they got nutrients into him the group had no idea, but overall they were glad that they could, even Jeremy was secretly thankful of this gradual recovery._

_The gang only stayed as long as they could before the awkward feeling of being in front of an unconscious person who seemed to have only faced death yesterday took hold of them and they left._

_Two people gave second glances back at him as they exited the room. One was Aelita._

_The other was Yumi._

**.why is it that the sleeping, dead, or unconscious are the easiest to talk to.**

_Reese…_

_Noontide washed into the hospital room, alighting all of the metal and the white walls into bright sunrays and shine. Despite the near unbearable brightness of it all, Reese's little sister Nevaeh was nestled in deep sleep, gripping his right arm and burying her face as far into him as she possibly could._

_In a chair pulled up next to the bed a young Japanese girl sat as Nevaeh's escort from Mrs. Periwinkle's house, her hands folded near her mouth in contemplation. Nevaeh's small breaths mixed with her brother's mechanical ones, and Yumi listened to them intently as her thoughts stabbed at her heart for the billionth time since she was rescued from his father._

_Weeks had passed. Yumi had lost precise count of how many, but she was guessing it was around two more weeks ever since they started to allow visitors to see him. She had come to visit him multiple times, usually with either Odd or Aelita (Jeremy started refusing to go) so she could sit there and talk to them during their visitation period. But there were other times that she went alone—the times that she never told Odd or Aelita about. Perhaps these were the times that Yumi remembered better, as she often found herself talking to Reese or just simply thinking more and more about him. Sometimes she felt as if she wasn't welcome there because they were enemies, and the pact they had shared was gone._

_There was only one time Yumi sorely regretted coming to visit Reese alone that day, and that was the day that on her way out she bumped into the girl that had opened up his chances for survival with a phone call. Tara had come to the hospital and saw Yumi at the door._

_She had stopped her, asking if she was a friend of "um, er, Reese's," and Yumi, slowly shaking her head but politely explaining that she knew him. Tara smiled at her, and asked if she'd like to go for a walk around the block before the red-haired girl went it to see Reese herself._

_Yumi obliged, and though she liked the walk and she generally liked Tara's optimism, she was uncomfortable the entire way, as if Tara knew something that she didn't have the privilege of sharing. The city scenery was quite lazy for a Saturday as they took a looping walk around the hospital. Tara asked quite a few questions, and Yumi answered them as best she could—for it'd be impolite to completely shut away her curiosity. After a while, a question popped up that twisted Yumi's insides._

"_So…you don't really like Reese then, huh?" Tara concluded. Yumi took note of how she stumbled over Reese's name quite a bit and that she was getting better of calling him that as the conversation wore on. But more than that, Yumi didn't know how to answer the question. She remained silent for a long while, her face furrowed in thought._

"_No. No I don't like him at all. He's horrible, stubborn, unthoughtful, dark, and he'll do anything to keep himself locked up nice and tight. I hate him," she finally answered._

_To Yumi's ultimate surprise, Tara turned her head to the side and started to giggle. Yumi whipped her head to look at the shorter girl in shock. What was she thinking about?_

"_Haha, yeah I get you there," She said in between giggles, "I didn't really know Reese too well, y'know? I just let him sit at our table in school and helped him around with stuff. Never really said a word back, except the occasional 'Yes,' 'No,' and 'Thank you.' He seems to have always had that strange aura about him…,"_

_Tara's laugh and happiness died down with a sigh as she started to recall what she and her friends had witnessed while he had gone to school there. Yumi took note of this change of heart and slowed down her strides to lengthen the walk. She was curious._

"_Strangest thing, though, was that nearly every day we could always pick out…a difference in his appearance," Tara paused in her speech and glanced up at Yumi, "You've seen them too, haven't you? The scars…,"_

_A shudder worked through Yumi and she nodded sullenly. It was a little hard to forget the abundance of those._

"_They…they appeared every other day?" She asked, whispering._

"_I'm quite sure they did, even if we didn't see them. There'd also be times where he'd come to school and some part of him would be wrapped heavily in bandages. Not professional ones, mind you, just like, the homemade gauze wrappers. Sometimes even ACE bandages were used for gauze purposes. It wasn't all that pleasant to see it going on._

"_My boyfriend Derek had the same gym class as him, and he told us that he's seen Reese do a lot of martial arts,"_

_Yumi interrupted with a nod before Tara went on._

"_So for a while we kept telling ourselves that it was the martial arts that did it. Derek even said that he's seen him practice with a sword replica. Once again we told ourselves it was the martial arts. But even the one in our group that has a die-hard love for Bruce Lee was convinced that all the scars he accumulated couldn't have come from just the martial arts,"_

_Yumi was silent. Tara was right. Yumi had gotten a whole array of bruises over her career in the arts, maybe a few cuts, but it was always things that healed over a given amount of time. Never anything that created a scar. Nothing that deep._

"_By the time we had decided to actually bring it to light to the ignorant teachers at our school…he was gone. Fall of last year, and just poof, gone," she confessed._

"_That's around the time he appeared at Kadic…," Yumi murmured, confirming Tara's observation. Tara nodded then stopped, for they were at the door of the hospital._

"_Yeah. I don't know. I feel awful, but everyone says I shouldn't feel that way. I guess I'll find out today, huh?" Her smile returned as she offered a hand. Yumi took it and shook gently, failing to force a smile of her own out._

"_Can't believe he wasn't a jerk to you," She pointed out, "Then again, my friend Aelita sure didn't have any problem with him,"_

_Tara retreated her hand as she answered almost casually, "The pink-haired girl? That's Aelita? Huh. No, I have no idea why she wouldn't have a problem with him," The tone in Tara's voice sounded like she actually did know, and she wasn't going to share it. Yumi squirmed and tried to survive through the rest of the conversation as Tara continued._

"_I'm pretty sure it was for personal reasons, and most likely ones you wouldn't think of," Tara turned around and glanced over her shoulder, waving a Queen's wave back to Yumi, "Ta-ta, then!"_

_As Tara disappeared into the hospital Yumi murmured a surly 'ta-ta' and turned on her heel, returning to Kadic promptly by walking, not even knowing that she was walking in the same footsteps that Reese had done just nearly a month ago._

_Yumi let out a hot breath of exasperated air and squeezed her eyes shut as she thought about that, Nevaeh shifting into a more comfortable position on her brother._

We always have been enemies…_she thought_.

The pact is gone. Nevaeh is safe. So we can all go back to the way we were…

_Yumi's mind flashed back to the night in the cave where Reese bandaged her wound and they played an unsettled game of quid pro quo with bats as witnesses. Then Reese had tricked her cruelly into thinking he was asleep. Which, in turn, made her blurt out a bunch of top-secret confessions to him. Oh! How she hated that!_

_But she had to admit: he was soothing warm to the touch._

_And this all raised the important question: Did she want to go back to the way they were?_

_Her mind flashed to the night he mocked her about crying over Ulrich, then to the night were they had such a fierce one that Reese blindly slapped her so hard that she had started bleeding from the zipper of his glove. Ugh. Horrible past—maybe it should be somewhat that way. At least it'd be familiar territory. Yumi had lots of experience when it came to fights. Her parents weren't exactly the most perfect married couple in the universe._

_Then again…the night of the slap Yumi nearly discovered something that resembled a turning point in her thoughts about Reese. The things that he murmured before he broke off into the woods, they had almost been like a key that unlocked part of his past to her. And after she had a crash encounter with Lukas, it wasn't too hard to figure out what had happened to Reese not long ago._

_Reese (and most likely his mother too) was a victim of domestic abuse._

_The profile fit, didn't it? The scars, the silent, stay-in-the-corner-unnoticed attitude, and all of his actions toward others nearly made everything make sense._

_Nearly._

_Sure, Aelita must've been quite an escape for him if they were in love. But if he was in love with Aelita…why did he transform into a Mongolian berserker every time she, Yumi, was in trouble? That day with the Xana clone…_

_How did he even know that it was fake?_

_Dull realizations started to slowly dawn on Yumi when her thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a shrill, excited voice._

"_Brugger?"_

_Yumi's eyes flew open. It was normal for Nevaeh to call out for him, but the way she did this time, why was it so hyper?_

"_Brugger? Brugger! Brugger!!"_

_Yumi lifted her head just in time to see Nevaeh scramble up to Reese's shoulder, nearly screaming his name as Reese turned his head and opened to the world a green eye that Yumi had been missing ever since they had closed._

_He was awake._

* * *

FPOW that was sentimental. God. Wow.

I need to go stab something.

I'll be right back.


	25. Truth about Lies

**You've gotten this far, and now this is it?**

**It's been years since this updated, and now this is it? And if this is an update, why isn't it a new chapter?**

**Well, I have some news for you. I've been getting messages about this story to this day.**

**reeseremembers . tumblr .com might have some answers for you.**

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Five: Truth about Lies

_End of fear is where we begin_

Small breaths blew on my cheek, warm, moist, and rhythmic. I felt it for the longest time before my senses even began to return. Brightness flew in through my lids and flooded my vision with red. It hurt too much to keep seeing that accursed color. In turn I forced my eyes open to be blinded by the white, and deafened by the cries of a baby angel.

"Brugger? Brugger! Brugger!"

Nevaeh my sister. Nevaeh my chrysanthemum. Nevaeh.

A chair was pushed aside in a hurry, accompanying a slightly strangled gasp. Disbelief filled her voice, and she found herself unable to say words. Instinctively I greedily drank her words in, as many of them as I could at a time.

"Ah…Ah, R-Reese! N-Nevaeh! Reese…! Reese…?"

Yumi, my companion. Yumi, my love. Yumi.

I felt tears appear under my eyes, and if I had the strength I would've burst. Nevaeh's face lit up with the strongest joy that I could comprehend, and the weight of her tiny hands on my shoulder intensified as she supported herself on them to see me better. Yumi started for a moment, as if to confront me and take Nevaeh off, but her smirk twisted painfully and she stepped back to allow peace between my sister and I. I watched her peripherally as she slinked backwards towards the door.

My mouth cracked open, forcing rusted vocal cords to work with my mind. I failed miserably at first, but as her hand graced the doorknob my desperation escalated to say my first words in forever.

"…Nno…,"

As pathetic and as soft as it sounded, the room fell stone silent. Nevaeh's eyes followed mine to stare at Yumi, who had frozen facing towards the door. Her hand gripped the knob fiercely, drawing her knuckles white. Nothing happened, so I spoke again.

"No…," grimace, "Don't…don't…" I swallowed, tried to continue, but couldn't find the strength. Yumi stood there, caught in between the decision to leave or stay. I shut my eyes in pain and swallowed again, a headache starting to butt its way through. The knob jiggled and my chest inwardly lurched.

Yumi's steps moved near me, and soon Nevaeh was lifted from me with her small protests. I cracked open my eyes again to a fading, blurry sight of Yumi's face with Nevaeh at her shoulder. Her shock was replaced with a distant regret as she stared at me.

"The nurse is coming," she explained, her voice twisted into mangled tones within my aching head, "we won't be able to stay."

Nevaeh waved a sad good-bye as Yumi turned to the door. Before she opened it she stopped and called back to me, sadly but with layers of hope.

"We'll come back."

By the time the nurse arrived I was all but passed out.

RISK-TAKER: It's annoying and frustrating

Oddly enough it saves lives

People came. People went. I was sleeping less and less as each day passed. The more they came the more I remembered. Tara, Aelita, Odd, Jeremy, Mrs. Periwinkle, Nevaeh, and Yumi frequented the most, though Tara didn't really show up as much. The only one who nearly beat Tara for infrequent visits was Yumi. The prize that goes to the most visits by a single person is…Jeremy.

Surprised? I was too at first…until he entered the room alone one day, a stern look on his face. His motions were stiff and business-like as he maneuvered the single chair in the room to sit next to my bed. It had been a week and a half since I first woke up—I had recovered quickly, and could sit up with the help of the hospital bed. There was always the dull pain of my arm and knee there, but otherwise I was healed enough for Jeremy to begin his visits.

"Reese…when you were to wake up I was going to converse with you about…sensitive subjects. I will be upfront, so don't be surprised if I go too far."

I blinked in response to him as he cleared his throat, scowling slightly while he avoided my gaze. Honestly he was confusing me by what he meant, shuffling the papers and files on his lap. I didn't have the faintest idea what he wanted to talk to me about unless it was about Aelita and _that_ would be awkward.

Jeremy's aura told me that it wouldn't entirely have to do with the girl of his dreams. Nonetheless I waited patiently for Jeremy to tidy up and begin. After a deep, irked breath of preparation he took his glasses off, stared me straight in the eye and started the avalanche.

"I'm going to invade your mind now, but I was working when you were unconscious. Researching,"

"Researching…what?"

Jeremy let out a huffy breath as he stared at me.

"Your father: Lukas."

My muscles tensed, bringing newfound pain to my body. I didn't say anything in response to him save for a surly "oh." Jeremy expected as much, and let the silence slide for an agonizing long while before he explained why.

"On the factory roof you and your father shared words that…could only be heard by you two. Even the camera couldn't pick those words up. I can't emphasize how much I watched the recording over and I'm still confused by what happened. So in turn, I looked up Lukas's past to better deduce such reasons for harming mere children." Jeremy paused and leaned forward, narrowing his blue eyes, "Do you know what I found?"

I stared at him, slightly knowing what but only at the back of my head.

"I searched for Lukas Anders…and found nothing. No files, no names, no DNA records, nothing,"

Devoid of responses, I kept up my emotionless staring contest with him. He breathed loudly, his shoulders rising up and down with his excitement.

"The man with the closest profile to your father is a man with the name of Lukas Stern—ironically the dad of our late friend Ulrich. I wondered, Reese, what you had to do with each other, so I researched that as well,"

When Jeremy gets angry, his voice will escalate and get rough depending on how angry he was. However, if Jeremy was utterly furious beyond logic, his voice gets low, vicious, and scary. Jeremy leaned forward even further, his voice the lowest I had ever heard it in all the years I had known him.

"I searched for you, Anders, and guess what I found?"

For fear and knowledge, I still said nothing. Jeremy answered anyways as I expected.

"I. Found. Nothing."

Silence.

"Reese Anders, according to the city database, you. Don't. Exist."

What a coincidence—I haven't wanted to exist ever since I started lying about everything.

Jeremy huffed a few more breaths, the edges of them reaching the bridge of my nose. His cheeks blushed to a bright color of anger, and he sighed in irritation before gathering his papers and glasses and standing up. He didn't say another word as he slammed the door behind him, leaving me alone in the silence that followed for the rest of the day. I had that for a brief interlude until he reappeared the very next morning, papers in hand, flustered and a tad on the clumsy side. The irritation had left most of his features this time, even though what he was about to share with me was something he had known far before he ever started researching about my father.

After he sat down again with that same business-like attitude, he took in another deep breath of preparation before confronting me yet again.

"How much do you know about Lukas, Reese?" he asked, leaving the previous subject only half-buried. I sighed heavily, feeling the backs of my mended ribs against the soft mattress.

"I don't know," I replied, "Not much. I…I don't like him. _Didn't_ like him."

"…Do you mind, Reese?" Jeremy asked. Stunned, I turned my full attention on him at the question. His eyes, which here highly irked yesterday now showed a certain level of sympathy and pity reserved for those without basic needs such as the hopelessly homeless. From anyone else I would've hated such a stare—but from Jeremy it meant something different. It meant…progress. Perhaps retribution. Another chance in friendship with my old, lost, friend.

After I got through the initial shock, I shook my head against my pillow to say that he could continue. Jeremy nodded to himself absent-mindedly and pulled out a file.

"Lukas, Reese, the one who you called your father…well, I'll just make a run-through I suppose…," Jeremy began, fixing his glasses back on his face, "whether he was your father or not…,

"I think, ah, the most important thing to cover would be that, well, he moved here from Germany to France because of his father abusing him and his family. The uh, neighbors apparently called on it and the mother took his family to France for relative's sake. You know, there's uh, statistics that uphold this lineage of abusiveness in families…mostly for the males too…," Jeremy shifted in his seat, slightly nervous.

"So it's not that surprising that he ended up…abusive too," he concluded, sifting through some papers and muttering some things under his breath.

Lineage of abusiveness. Lineage of abusiveness.

God.

This meant that I could end up…exactly, _exactly_ like him. There were the signs, weren't there? The mood swings, the harsh anger…the slap, slapping Yumi in the face, my willingness to blindly harm my own father, the hatred I felt towards Lukas, William, and hell Sissy too I bet.

My vision started to get dangerously woozy, and I moaned distantly. Jeremy immediately stopped what he was doing, dropped his files to the side of the chair and stood up, calling my name I believe. I felt his hand at my shoulder, and to respond to him I swung my head limply and stared pathetically up at him.

"Reese are you okay? Can you hold on?!"

"mmfmwegghh…," I gurgle, unsure of how to answer that truthfully, "those statistics…that statistic…what did it say, what were the numbers…," I asked in a moan.

Jeremy refused to tell me, but kept talking to me as if it would bring me back out of this terrible state. Keeping a hand on my shoulder, the other hand reached above my head to push the nurse button.

Sloppily but surely I raised my better arm and slapped down on his outstretched hand just in time. I looked him determinedly in the eye as I lowered my voice to a weak but meaningful growl.

"The numbers, Jer…give me th' numbers…,"

Jeremy looked at me, looked at the nurse button, and bit his lower lip. After a while he sighed, and nodded, retreating his hand. The fierceness of my glare didn't simmer down until he had seated himself again, to which I let out a breath of exhaustion and somewhat relaxed again. Jeremy coughed uneasily before he opened up a file again and read straight from it.

"Er…sixty percent of males abused by their fathers go on to continue the abusive lineage after they themselves get married and/or have a relationship with someone. Th-Then…you know, forty percent don't. Y'know Reese that isn't a bad percentage, that really isn't—,"

I was really far gone by this time. Sixty percent. _Sixty percent._ More than half. My vision blacked out but I could still feel I was conscious—I heard Jeremy's voice asking again if I was alright and I heard him reach again for the call button.

"Fine," I interrupted him, "I'm fine Jeremy, fine."

Jeremy backed up, stared at me, and contemplated whether I was telling the truth or not. I wondered _myself_ if I was telling the truth. He nodded after a while, though he was still worried. I watched his blurred shape shuffle more papers, and barely comprehended his last few words.

"Reese I'm not saying that it's gonna happen to you, alright? All I know is that he also went to a local college here where he met his future wife. After that…well I haven't looked after that,"

He muttered to himself once again as he slid the files into his arms and walked to the door. In the midst of turning the knob he paused for a moment, thought of something, then turned to me—a fiery sort of irritation back in his eyes.

"But if it does happen to you, I swear Aelita will never be yours."

The door shut with a final click—not as loud as yesterday's slam, but far more powerful.

Jeremy left me there lying in the bed, torn up inside from the information I had just learned.

Lineage of abusiveness.

Sixty percent.

SYNDICATED: Imperfectly being perfect at the same time

Being Aelita; in line but out of line with everyone else

Those two statements glued themselves into my brain, and I was unable to break free of them no matter how desperate I was to do so. Even if my greatest friends were present to take my mind off of this world I was still…lost, shall we say. Even when Nevaeh was there my eyes were distant from the thoughts of the distantly real nightmare that now plagued my head.

Lineage of abusiveness, sixty percent.

I imagined her beaten, bruised, crying. I imagined a shadow standing over her, a shadow that did nothing but resembled me.

Yumi, being a faded ghost in the corner, caught my scariest attention. I imagined her bloody, broken, laying at my feet.

Mrs. Periwinkle, twisted, mangled, unable to scream at the bottom of a stairs I was standing at the top of.

Aelita, laying there unconscious, abandoned, forgotten.

Odd, head twisted backwards, smiles and laughter gone from the pain I had caused.

Jeremy, glasses broken, contacts removed, eyes blinded.

Nothing that ever could happen would tear my mind away from the two accursed lines I practically made Jeremy spit out to me.

Lineage of abusiveness.

Sixty percent.

Out of everything that people told me, that people showed me, from newspaper articles with my face on the front page ("Unlikely Hero Saves Two Girls Selflessly") to the latest news from Lyoko secretly shipped to me via Aelita, only a few select things reached my ears.

Nevaeh had reached her birthday, and I had missed it.

I could walk without crutches in a few days, thanks to the healing done as I was laying in a coma and afterwards physical therapy.

And the talent show had decidedly been cancelled due to lack of entrants—replaced with a belated memorial service for the student that was Ulrich Stern.

Lineage of abusiveness.

Sixty percent.

PERPLEXION: It's a talent when you learn not to show it

Jeremy has learned how to do that over the years

The knee brace and the cast on my arm felt totally alien to me, but after a day's return to Kadic academy I soon got used to them. What I didn't get used to was the stares.

When I arrived back here as Reese Anders I got some stares, but nothing too overly drastic, and soon all stares at me vanished like I did into the walls. It was something I had slowly gotten used to in public too—the stares of fear, pity and interest is nothing new for someone with overly abundant scars. In an overview, I was used to it.

These stares didn't go away. These stares were not because of my scars or my foreboding aura. The stares I was getting now all revolved around the events that happened only two months ago. Saving Yumi and Nevaeh had inadvertently made me a heroic celebrity, and as I soon found out the school was doing everything it could to keep the nosy newscasters away from me. Emotions such as admiration, astonishment, confusion, and just blank wonder stares all now tickled the back of my neck every time I turned around. It bothered the hell out of me, but there was nothing I could ever do about it.

As I half-limped around campus for the next week or so I became closer and closer with my original friends more than I had ever dreamed I would be. It was a false dream come true. Though the connections helped along with personal therapy, there was always such an abundant emptiness when I was around them, especially when I had to be pushed away when they needed to talk about Lyoko. It was nothing for me but one bright, shining, blatant reminder:

They don't know me.

Aelita knew that time was running short, and she had more than once taken me aside to talk to me about when it was possibly going to happen that I was going to come out of my shell so to speak. For the longest time I didn't know, didn't _want_ to know how, until the memorial service drew closer and closer, and suddenly I had an idea.

I shared it with her. She froze, then slowly nodded, slowly agreed, then quickly made arrangements for it to be so. Aelita told me afterwards that Mr. Delmas and Jim were to speak first before declaring open mike to all friends. My eyes lit up when I heard this. The entire school would be there for reasons the principal really only knows.

It was a one-shot chance only days away.

In between those days, I had come across an unexpected event while thinking one day alone in the park. I wasn't expecting anyone to even pass by accidentally I was in so deep.

A rustling in the bushes behind me proved me wrong.

Startled, I turned around almost too swiftly and nearly fell over—especially when I saw Yumi standing there, staring at me with a sort of soft, unknowable complexion.

I opened my mouth to speak, but she shushed me with her finger to her lips. Taking a few steps toward me she tipped her head downward as she began to speak.

"You know, Reese...I never came back. I should say I'm sorry. I-I am,"

Instinct told me to verbally brush off her needless apology but the quiet, unsure tone of her voice shut me up. I was curious as to what she was going to say and do. I would never expect anything like she did.

Yumi took another baby step forward, drawing in a shaky breath.

"Also, for saving my life...I never...said...,"

Yumi's breath stopped short, and she looked at me, eyes shiny with unshed tears. She shook her head as she stared at me and tipped her chin downward again. After a while I was finally about to reply when she shut her eyes tight in preparation and stood up on her toes, craning her neck forward.

Everything in my body absolutely froze as her small lips tenderly brushed the heart of my scar, where the skin was still red and healing. There was enough gentle pressure for a light sting of pain to accompany it, but it only made the sensation that more everlasting.

My jaw shuddered as she held her lips there, dropping slightly open from shock. Yumi murmured something incoherent as she slowly pulled away, brushing a lock of crimson hair behind her ear. She didn't make eye contact with me, nor did she say another word. All she did was give a low, neutral hum, then walked off into the woods.

Lukas took away my scar, and Yumi gave it back to me.

The memory stayed with me for the rest of the days until the memorial service.

The auditorium was too humid and dark to think calmly that night. I squirmed constantly in my seat, sweating as Mr. Delmas set up a photo projector-overhead next to the podium that the microphone was placed on. Mr. Delmas gave a long speech, a speech I don't remember anything of due to my nervousness.

Jim spoke. Some blither-blather that I couldn't understand but still knowing that he screwed up at some points of the story. At the end he coughed then awkwardly announced open mike.

I jumped up out of my seat, and rather quickly advanced to the stage stairs. Aelita had hidden herself off stage to what was going to be my right as I slowly ascended up to the stage. When my face hit the blazing, bright light, gasps and scowls of disbelief and disgust could be plainly heard from within the crowd. I did my best to ignore them and approached the podium.

The podium was fifty meters away even when I was standing right next to it. Sweat that shouldn't have been there dripped down my forehead, but I forced myself to ignore it. My heart pounded at a thousand miles an hour, hitting against my sternum so hard it hurt. I took in a deep breath. Took in another. Then looked out to the eyes of the crowd.

One more breath, then I began to speak.


End file.
